This is a good story to begin the new postings on this blog.
Though long, this write up by Jason is worth reading because it illustrates with specifics and detail a lot of what is wrong with the RCS (Radical Corporate Scientology). His experiences — and he would serve perfectly as the “typical staff member” — demonstrate all of the following. Disdain for the well being of the individual. Insane stat pushing. Mistreatment of children. An utter inability to think or apply reason to even the most mundane task, but instead substituting the “winning valence” (mad orders and “cover your ass” actions). Insane regging and efforts to sell “the Basics.” Treating staff like slaves. And a culture of violence accompanied by idol worship of Miscavige (Jason’s bathroom sign incident is the perfect microcosm of “COB”). And you just know that everything is not only true, it is probably understated. What a waste of a dedicated, willing and hard working staff member. Mike
My name is Jason Barclay and below is my Sea Org story. It is more important to focus on what can be done now or just simply remain modern day philosophers. I’m letting this story go out into the world because it’s very therapeutic to finally send it out there. Also, I hope current Sea Org members come across it, as it may wake them up.
All feedback is appreciated.
The current SO members, at least in the CLO, are miserable. With high stress and few days off they are living the lives of slaves. They are very tough people and ‘can put up with it all’ but are in need of help themselves. Any way you can put ethics in on the Church seems to be the only way you can help them.
***Random Tidbits and Experiences***
Keep the following bits of data in mind when you read the SO STORY.
*Before I joined the Sea Org I had a small degree of Candida. Candida is a yeast that normally lives in the body peacefully. But when you eat the American diet (Sugars, processed foods, trans fats etc) this yeast becomes a HULK. Ultimately it destroys your immune system, makes it hard to go to sleep, prevents you from sleeping well… etc but can eventually become it’s own cause of death if untreated. Naturally I mysteriously began to get constantly sick in the SO and had obvious visible signs of Candida. The one medical liaison person on the base for 1,000 SO members had no idea what I had. So I’d continue living my life of no sleep, eating the exact things that fueled the thing, being around harmful chemicals and epoxy paints… After being in the Sea Org for 1.5 years my heart started to ‘feel funny’ at times. Again, the person on the base didn’t know what the cause was so asked me to report if anything more happened. If I didn’t leave the Sea Org on that fate changing night I would have died.
*My mom was on the level during this time and since LRH said ‘calmag helps’, she was ordered to take too much of it every day. She had no time to exercise but her health was of no concern to the Church, only how she would be able to borrow and earn money to stay on the level. Over time she also started having some ‘heart trouble’ that I didn’t know about. She gained about 40lbs in 3 years while ‘on the level’. She had taken so much Cal Mag that her body stopped strengthening her bones. As a result bruises would last for weeks. She’s certain that if she hadn’t left the church, she would have died. Also please understand that people ‘on the level’ were not allowed to see chiropractors since that was obviously ‘Another Practice’, just like ‘seeing doctors’. Thank god she left or we would both no longer be around.
*There was no real medical coverage. Just one person on post and if she didn’t know the handling for whatever you might have then you’d just get sent to a room full of sick people (ISO) that would never be filled with vitamins and get well gear. It was assumed people here were ‘Ser-Facing(just trying to make others wrong)’ and shouldn’t receive any ‘extra attention’ or funds. That’s also why my candida had grown so out of control. The one person over health didn’t know why I had visible candida symptoms and I would just get yelled at every other week when I got a little sick (candida kills your immune system- bad idea when you work in bathrooms all day).
*If your stats were not up it was only because you were ‘off policy’ and would get yelled at constantly and told ‘YOU DON’T WORK FOR LRH’. If your stats were up but your area still had some trouble, well, then you still ‘didn’t work for LRH’ and would get yelled at. You’d get ‘used’ to a weekly slew of insults and angry comments and no actual leadership from above. I believe the leadership is better hearted in African diamond mine areas. The few nice Seniors are far outweighed by the dominating loud mouths and entheta.
*Within the Sea Org, if you desperately needed an item (which was any item you needed for your post) and happened to see it, you are usually desperate enough to take it without knowing who it belonged to or how to get it back to them. If you leave your laundry in the laundromat for two full days it is unlikely you will get everything back, especially when you leave any ‘common items’. If you leave equipment, dollies or generally useful items not locked up and accessible you can expect it to go missing within the hour.
*The tools and belongings of other people, especially the engineers, were always getting ripped off by random people, especially the RPF who were heavily pushed to do an amazing amount of work every day and often without the tools they needed for the job.
*Near the end of my first year I half joked and asked my senior if I could have a LOA. He had just had a LOA himself and only laughed in response, like I was crazy.
*In the first 1.5 years working there I spent $1,500 out of my own pocket on lights and paint. I would get killed if a light bulb went out whether or not there was money for them. So I’d constantly have to go out of pocket to try and keep from getting nailed and possibly to try and earn those precious days off (Since lights also affected my stat). I also knew that if a light bulb was out but my stats were up I would not be able to take a day off. This usually required me to spend $50-$100 out of my own pocket to handle this when I thought I could get a day off despite the nine reasons I could still get rejected above. One Christmas my dad sent me $300 and I had to spend all of it on lights. Whenever I’d tell people I was donating lights to my Org I would only hear ‘That’s stupid!’ – But then I’d just keep getting killed if any lights went out.
*I slept in a room with 18 other people and few of us were on the same schedule. It usually smelled bad, with 2 regular farters and 5 regular snorers. The guy right below me snored like a Harley and if you didn’t climb into bed like a NINJA he would get pissed and punch the bottom of your bed really hard. One guy, like the movie dumb and dumber, loves to make use of his three blankets and would keep the window wide open even during winter. I found out that 16 of the 18 people in the room hated the room being -50° at night. But since he would open the window after we’d all go to sleep we sort of felt stuck living in freezing temperatures, so he could enjoy his three blankets.
*I’ve seen a few IAS reg cycles where the reg extracted the full amount of saved infrastructure funds the company needed for maintenance and expansion (Around $200,000 each time). Life savings and things like that were ‘better spent’ on the churches needs.
*I’ve seen many heart breaking SO reg cycles where married couples were ruthlessly torn apart because one or the other ‘wasn’t qualified for the SO’.
*There weren’t many ‘Direct’ KR’s, usually KRs written in CLO were CC’d to 10-20 other people – who would often demand answers and even conditions assigned before the full data, or even your response, was available.
**** MY SEA ORG STORY***
I was 13 years old at Flag while my mom was trying to stay on the level. This was around 1998.
Some recruiters asked me to help save the world and I said ok, as long as I got to see my family (in California) once a year for 3 weeks. I was told I would be on a ‘lineup’ to eventually become a Super Power auditor. My mom and sister went shopping for me, buying me matching pillows and stuff so I would feel more at home there. They gave it to me before the shuttle picked me up to take me to my berthing for the first time. After my mom left I randomly blurted out that I missed her and the other SO members there laughed at me. I was later told I would have to throw out the pillow covers blankets and sheets by my EPF I/C since they were not “matching”.
When I joined I was told I’d have a guardian who would be there like a buddy for me. I never saw him again.
I also had my entire collection of ‘Magic The Gathering’ cards I had gotten from all previous birthdays etc. (About 1,000 cards) These were all taken from me, behind my back, when I graduated the EPF and moved into a new room. My mom wasn’t able to stay on the level and I felt responsible.
I was told I’d be able to go to school while in the S.O. but I only went to one day of school at a Delphi where we were taught Psychology ‘speed reading’ tech where you could ‘guess’ the definitions of words based on the paragraphs before. I asked the teachers why they were teaching that and that was my last day of school for the next 6 months. They didn’t seem to care if any of the SO kids were really learning. I wondered why I no longer had to go to school because I thought that was a government requirement for my age.
I would get up each day and be at the 9:30am muster. I’d study Scientology data for 5 hours a day and get back home at 10pm after work. Every day for the first 4 months I was verbally abused twice a day by the then EPF IC ‘David Engleheart’.
I would have to do hard manual labor like moving bags of cement around. Sometimes it was gruesome, sometimes it was ok. I loved working in the rain but realized later that was messed up that ‘the rain’ was no excuse for getting a little less of a ‘product’ that day. On my last day in the EPF I was physically abused by the EPF IC who was mad I didn’t have a uniform belt yet. He grabbed me by the hips and shook me around a bit asking where my belt was. I simply replied that the uniform IC said it would still be a week or two.
A few times I worked till about 1AM in the morning and left once I ‘felt done’ and crying only because my team IC forgot to tell me we were done for the day.
When it came time for my LOA they would only give me 2 weeks off.
So I called my mom and had her withdraw her permission for me to be in the SO.
****12 years later****
I was the Second in command of a 26 man Scientologist film group. I was the cinematographer, director, lighting, sound, editor, marketer, producer and main investor. Unfortunately the head guy was an SP. We had been ‘producing’ for two years. About once a week the head guy would slap me on the back of the head only when I was trying to work on editing and wondering why his ripped version of Adobe was ‘acting funny’. He was an SP and I didn’t have that tech. During this entire time I had no help from the church since I was a ‘freeloader’ from when I was in the SO at 13 years old. I needed help but didn’t have much money because I was investing everything into the show. I was making about 3k a month as an Extra and about $1500 a month as a professional editor for three shows.
One member of our cast was Weston Dugganstar, son of George Duggan who was a multimillionaire scientologist. Weston had full access to the bridge but still wouldn’t want to set foot in the church. Instead Weston was living for no rent in one of our rooms and racked up a $500 bill with me for rarely paying for my car mileage or house utilities.
Soon I became able to pay my freeloader debt so I could continue my bridge. I finished all of my ‘lower conditions’ for leaving the SO when I was a minor. I even paid my freeloader debt. I also had $1600 ready to pay for my purif – but I was stopped and still labeled as a ‘freeloader’. But still I could not get my status lifted and be allowed to continue up the bridge for the next 3 months. Instead, the MAA at CC recommended that I used my purif funds to buy half a Basics set as that would “help my chances of upgrading my status”.
Then they came to recruit me again (Feb 2010). The recruiters promised I would have good berthing, $50 dollars a week, free medical, 3 weeks off a year, every other Sunday off and would be promoted to Golden Era Productions Right away. They knew I had about $4000 of debt and said we’d be able to “handle that later” – but we never did.
I told them I wouldn’t join unless the make/break point of Scientology was at risk. They said it was, so I joined. That was it and none of the recruiters promises came true.
(This is what I looked like when ‘in a good mood’)
When I routed onto the EPF I had a Blackberry Tour phone which was taken ‘because you can’t have phones on the EPF’. The recruiters made me terminate my sprint contract which ADDED a $300 debt in my name. I later learned this phone was given to my seniors senior and basically stolen from me by Sea Org officers. Unless it was pure coincidence my senior’s senior got a new blackberry tour phone two weeks later? Hey that was ‘the greatest good’ right? The EPF was tough but at least it was “sane”.
Me and my best friend (and model EPFer) graduated in the same week. He was going to be the new CO LA Org Estates and I would be his junior. He didn’t last a week and I was ‘promoted’.
I quickly learned that the AC units in LA Org were turned on during the renos ‘so the new wood could acclimate’- This only FILLED the AC vents with construction dust and fiberglass that still remain to this day as a health risk to all who enter. Most ideal Orgs are done the same way.
Unfortunately along most of the hallways there was a design to put high trim along the ceiling and in sections so it could freely expand and contract with different temperatures. Near the beginning of this they looked up and realized they had the sections mismatched. Instead of correcting the error right away they decided to fill all expansion joints through the entire building instead so they would “look the same”. As a result, most of those expansion joints continue to bulge their fillers and paint by 1 cm every three months. $10mil was spent on those renovations and didn’t cover those high trim pieces somehow so our RPF had to do it and was of the few things ‘the Church’ handled on that renovation. $100K was spent on painting but the walls were coated with a ‘washable’ flat sheen, which later had to be completely redone after excecs tried to yell me into making flat paint work for a commercial building. And boy did they try.
On average LA Org was making around $30,000 a week combined and I would usually only see $300 out of that to go towards all maintenance and sanitary items required to keep the 60,000 Sqr ft building serviceable to the public. This more often than not required money to come out of my own pocket in order to meet the high demands of the executives over the Org as gone over below (Mostly spent on lights and paint).
Also during the renovations about 10 parking spaces were taken out of the total space count to allow for more trees. LA Org was usually empty but about twice a week that parking lot would get full since it serviced all buildings in the area. Any cars left overnight would automatically get towed before daybreak. Staff or even Sea Org who parked their cars in that lot, even in the daytime, were usually at risk of their cars getting towed.
(There was a later incident when my mom went to flag and she left me her car so I could go places on my days off. I called security and told them I was parking it in a specific spot in the parking structure. The guard recommended I got a card. Two days later it was towed. He did not tell me that if I did not get a card then it would be towed. My mom got back from flag two weeks later. We went to the parking structure where I had left it. It was around midnight. We found out then that it had been towed. The security guard that showed up did nothing to help, he only continued to try and make me wrong for not having got the card as my mom freaked out about the out security of having her OT seven materials and no way to get home. We ended up calling a taxi and she was later charged about $500 for the tow. No apologies were made by the church and I was asked to “handle my mom’s ARC break”.)
I started with two “staff” to take care of the new $10,000,000 Model Ideal Org of earth (LA Org). One staff had just previously been homeless and was a ‘wide-open-case’, he would believe ANYTHING anyone said with wide eyed enthusiasm, before he would fall asleep in utility closets throughout the org.
The other staff member had a decent heart but was a previous drug (meth) dealer with a shaved head, tons of tattoos and did more damage as the ‘Maintenance Officer’ than he repaired. You would expect to see him at a rave and not as a clergy member by a long shot. Oh and with one slight catch, I actually had NO control over their actions since I was merged into LA Org from CLO. So instead I became the handy janitor as they ran happy errands for the Org.
I received ZERO training or apprenticing for my post on how to professionally take care of ALL cleaning and maintenance actions of my org to 5 star hotel standards. I did, however, take a cleaning course which recommended cleaning products from the 60’s. Any training I did receive was on the ‘feel of it all’ or the ‘essence a CO Building should have’.
If an executive was upset that 1 in 12 BR’s was dirty at any time in the day my seniors would only shout my head off and tell me how bad I was doing. They would never try to find the WHY and hat and correct as needed. The criminal level of my only staff (THAT I HAD NO CONTROL OVER) never seemed to be a factor. A regular thing my seniors senior would shout was “YOU DON’T WORK FOR LRH! I DO!”. That’s like a priest shouting to another, “You don’t work for god! I do!”. It is funny to look back on it now.
The only regular policy applied from above to me was “HCOPL ETHICS PRESENCE” and the condition assignment of Liability/Treason.
I was on my own to learn how to hold the post, with my two “staff” doing more harm than good.
The homeless guy ended up throwing out $1,000 worth of microfiber rags in his first week and the drug dealer set fire to the CPU of one of our treadmills. Thank god he rarely actually worked. He later became a folder admin of all things but held that post well, strolling down the hallways with tats and all.
It was ‘known’ that I had 2 juniors and I wasn’t ‘keeping the org up to standards’. But since I was CLO I was not their actual senior and had no say on their actions either. The CLO into LA Org board had never been figured out and I was left as the glorified target for upset church executives. There were a few times I almost changed my post title to “Glorified Target For Angry Execs”, just out of spite.
7 months later I finally gained an awesome staff member, his name was Alfred. Even though I had no direct control over him he would listen to my pleas of common sense and how to better take care of the Org. The Org was spotless at this time. People started flowing into the Org. I stopped getting yelled at. The income of LA Org started to skyrocket. I closed him and his wife to join the Sea Org. I knew that with him I could change the face of LA Org and start making progress on the real outpoints I had noticed. But he was ripped off and told he would be the FSM IC Day and Fdn on STAFF. The income of LA Org promptly crashed to its normal range. It must have been assumed, “Alfred on post makes stat go up, lets put him on a GI post!” He and his wife were told they would be the FSM IC and deputy respectively. As Day AND Fdn staff members their finances were immediately crippled since they were not able to moonlight like the rest did. After 1 week of this, and still without receiving their post title, they decided to have a kid and left for good. The income stayed crashed. The Org wasn’t as kept up as it was before and I started to get yelled at again since I was “obviously off policy” with my own crashing stats.
My stats were SQRPCS (Square Paces) which was another way of saying square yards of perfect space. If there was one handprint on a hallway wall, which was 300SQRPCS, with three people present and doing “Touch that wall” drills – it would get flunked. A few spaces would get flunked because “The arrangement of books doesn’t match the opening picture from 7 months ago”. I would be up 6 hours past my secure time trying to “get my stat up”. It took me 1 year to get the guard to tell me WHY spaces were getting flunked. Naturally this all led to a roller coaster – so I must be PTS and shouldn’t get actual handlings.
I got to have libs about 6 days a year and in spurts. There were 10 reasons I couldn’t have libs even though my stats would be up on my libs week as follows:
1. Your stats aren’t up enough
2. Your stats aren’t in a high enough range
3. Your stats are roller-coastering (And no handlings then done)
4. You were recently sick
5. All is not well in your building
6. There is an event the day before, which you will have to be at for 5 hours, and that would be too much time off your post.
7. I forgot to pass your CSW on, sorry…
8. It isn’t your libs week, oops it was, sorry…
9. You ‘upgraded’ out of liability before the libs CSW deadline but didn’t turn in your new Normal Condition to me (Even though my post stats and post condition was in affluence)
10. You didn’t make your ‘Golden Age of Tech’ WQSB quota. (Sales on Basics – I never wanted to figure out how you do that while cleaning toilets as I felt that would be awkward for the public), so it would come out of my pocket.
I learned that in the PAC Base there was no such thing as doing Evaluations. The orgs were empty and we were constantly operating on “orders from management to increase bodies in the shop”. This was in the form of the yelling chain of command and if someone was not “getting bodies in the shop” they would get yelled at because they were ‘obviously off policy’, crammed in random policies, demoted or transferred. At no point was anyone really allowed to take a look at the scene, look for out tech and off policy actions that could be repelling the public away. Harassing our public with phone calls, mail, unrealistic reg cycles, unfocused bridge actions, prioritized IAS donations and fighting over them between different orgs able to deliver the same service- never seemed to be even remote causes and suggesting them were treasonous. (Most of these fights were between ASHO and LA Org. Since ASHO also delivered grades, the basics courses, introductory courses and a slew of other auditing services in addition to the SHSBC) I knew early on that the empty orgs was a neon sign of off policy and out tech actions. It didn’t seem we had much of a chance of improving but I believed that if I just held on “someone else” would be able to untangle this mess.
It almost seemed a weekly occurrence that a public allowed to finally do OT preps at ASHO was smashed back down to redo their purif because it was found they had administered it outside the church.
After six months of that Estates life it was finally time that I was going to get promoted. I was finally going to go to Gold and two more SO members were going to be added to LA Org Estates so I could escape the hellhole I was stuck in. I started FPRD. Each session would start with “I’m not auditing you” and after covering the ruds he would then say “now for your FPRD”. During this time, I suddenly found out about a very gross time of my past but was glad I would be able to audit it out. At times my auditor would be looking at the meter very impressed and I would say, “I’m getting a lot of TA huh?” He would nod in response. I felt physically lighter after each session but was also always at a loss since no havingness processes were done to make up the sheer amount of TA I had gone through. An old “overt” from a long time ago (this life) turned up, it was an out 2D action that almost happened (very serious compared to my virgin lifestyle). This was enough to cancel my promotion. I was told that the two people that were going to replace me were still going to LA Org, so I would at least finally have personnel under me. Unfortunately, these two men were ripped off by my own command channel and sent to other areas within PAC BASE CREW. Instead I would continue to be yelled at for ‘not applying policy’ and ‘simply keeping my org perfect’. At the same time my FPRD stopped and I was left in the middle of it. I would stay ‘in the middle of it’ for the next six months and not even be allowed to do OW write-ups or do the purif, since I was “in the middle of a major action”.
To say I was crushed would be an understatement since going to GOLD was the whole reason I joined.
***THE CALL CENTER***
To top this off, the next day my senior’s senior, Rebecca Christenson, began to hit me across the back of the head every day when I went to the Golden Age of Knowledge recovery WQSB. This continued for 6 months straight. It was known I was stuck in a major action and she knew that action restimulated me. As if it wasn’t enough that she ripped my juniors away from me. Going to the WQSB was a hell in itself. In theory our job was to call ex-Scientologists or people who fell off the lines, get them to talk about what went wrong and convince them to talk to the next person on the line. Unfortunately you were so pressed to make your quota of transfers that if someone yelled at you or said they were sick of your ‘cult’ you would assume it must have been your bad handling and would leave no phone notes so hopefully the next guy could have better luck. As a result you would mostly call people that have been getting harassed, threatening legal, on the do not call list or simply shocked that the last 15 people who ‘said they would help them get off the list’ were lying. In reality, your job was first to get the person to admit they were them by trying to sound like a casual friend (e.g. Hey Chris, how are you?). Then you would hope they could give up their ARC break so you could then hot potato them over to the ‘material consultant’. I would frequently get a hold of people that just moved or just got a new cell phone number JUST TO GET AWAY FROM THE CHURCH’S CALLS AND MAIL. I felt bad when I got them to admit their identity knowing they would continue to get calls and mail possibly until the end of time. My own twin sister fell into that category and started receiving mail a week after she moved to her new place.
I would only get hit by Rebecca while I was sitting at my desk, and while trying to produce, and would always be out of the blue for maximal impact. Even if I was making my quota I’d still get hit across the back of the head in ‘enthusiasm’. I couldn’t believe she had been knowingly restimulating me all that time. I only found that out on the last day when she said, “I know this restimulates you but what you did ‘wasn’t ok’ ”.
On average we’d contact about 10,000 people a week. Of those we’d get maybe 100 to buy basics packages. Of those 50% would either send them back or simply didn’t do them. The other 9,900 were aggrieved and felt harassed so we could reach those 100 basics sales.
So you see you are calling a body of harassed and then venomously upset people. The only “nice” people you would call were ones that already had what you’re calling about and were current Scientologists usually disgruntled by our lack of admin. Lucky for them we’d start aking them about the next events instead!
The thing that shook me the most about that experience in the call center is that none of the other 40 Sea Org members present ever said anything or lifted a single finger in regards to my abuse.
I felt bad for all of the material consultants because if they were not regularly getting basics packages from this broken and hostile list of ex-Scientologists then their chances of ever having days off were zero.
The ‘execs’ declared that if you weren’t making a sale every week then you were off policy, not following the patter and should be further punished. If you were one of the poor souls who actually sold a package once a month then you would not be allowed to take libs at all on any week you didn’t sell a complete basics package $3,500 a piece (regardless of your post stats).
***Continuing SO Story***
After those six months of hell in the call center (while being stuck in the middle of my whole track FPRD and getting hit each day at the WQSB with execs completely baffled why I couldn’t handle that Org on my own) a major “incident” almost happened. I was out on an award watching “The Adjustment Bureau” someone came for me in the theatre saying that there was an incident in my Org. I was told rags that I had brought down to the basement had caught fire. I knew it was right next to 20,000 PC folders and was crushed beyond belief thinking I have blocked the bridge of 20,000 PCs.
Two weeks before this my senior ordered the grounds officer to have the EPF unit take self flammable oil to maintain the front planters of LA Org with. Neither he nor the grounds officer told the EPF or me that this oil can catch itself on fire. Instead they expected you to know the “flammable” label on top meant “will catch itself on fire if let sit in the open on a bunch of rags”. The EPF unit left a gallon of this oil with a bunch of clumped rags on top that were doused in this oil within the first floor cleaning closet. I was ordered to take that item from that closet down to the basement…
Two weeks later… It wasn’t until I got back to the base that I was told they had only started to smolder. I was considered to be the only one at fault for those rags smoldering in the basement and was assigned Treason. Over the next month I had to do 50 hours of amends and could only use my mealtimes and sleep time. I also had to contribute $200 more out of my pocket towards the Org as part of “Liability”. I was demoted to the LA Org cleaning IC regardless but had all of the same functions, responsibilities and still had to go out of pocket for weekly lightbulbs. Being stuck in the middle of FPRD was considered a main cause for my “destructive behavior” and I was allowed to resume and finish my FPRD! How nice! But of course now that I was receiving auditing I was not allowed to take days off haha.
A few months later the local Sea Org Security I&R who had been inspecting my stats was demoted and placed as the CO LA Org Estates. He was still in the middle of doing his lower conditions for having engaged in an out 2d action on the base. Luckily, LA Org started setting aside more money for sanitary and maintenance but this new guy, Trevor, began buying expensive cleaning items instead of much-needed maintenance items. He was in the middle of his own Sec check and did not feel ready for this post. He would do maybe four maintenance actions a week. And I would continue holding all cleaning actions and would do 5 to 6 maintenance actions a week. But my seniors loved him since he knew how to talk and demand that I “work more”. He started to go nuts when he realized that it was not possible for me to “work more”. He was also promised we would be getting two more personnel to our estates that we could, for the first time, have the required amount of personnel to do the job. After four months going by with that proving to be a false promise he blew. I much wanted my old post back but was told I was “not qualified”. Of course I would still have to continue holding the exact same functions as my first day in that building.
Two months later a new kid, demoted from the Freewinds, was posted above me. I still had to hold the same functions while he took four weeks to “groove in”. He promised he would help with the cleaning load since he knew that was the majority of the work but this lasted only for one day. And boy was that one of my best days there! After that he did spend a half-hour a day sweeping hallways and stairwells but not the three hours a day he had agreed to. He would do some maintenance but spent the most of his time creating ‘new plans’ for the Org. One ‘new idea’ was to clean the org and he passed that ‘plan’ to me to ‘implement’. His idea for me was to ‘forget about the past’ and start anew. I could not simply forgive and forget the above and thought him a shitty leader for suggesting this.
Then, one day I looked at my inbox and noticed I was demoted AGAIN to the nighttime cleaner. I was told we would gain a new personnel within a few weeks who was currently in the CAT B EPF (For previous Sea Org members that had really messed up and needed extra “handling”) – and she would become the LA Org Cleaning IC – MY SENIOR. I was devastated that after everything I had gone through, everything I had done and kept my production at a level that no senior could even approach, I had been demoted with no ethics hearing, committee of evidence or even “a memo”, so much for being ‘Permanent Status’. To me this was an ultimate statement of how little they had to think of me. To not even let me know I was being demoted?
My mom, Chris Barclay, was on OT seven and said she did not want to stay on the level and would not go back to Flag. I granted her beingness and simply talked about the importance of the bridge for the fate of this planet and the universe. A flag rep from CLO then called her asking her to go to flag, she then agreed. She came back from flag asking for a refund. I was shocked and wondered what mis-handlings had taken place. I told her if she did something LRH said was bad then I would have to disconnect and asked her to withdraw her request for a refund. She did. She told me she couldn’t say anything but that I should read the HCOB “the no-interference zone”. LRH very clearly said that OT’s cannot be interfered with. In there, he mentions that if an OT is moving slowly then there is roughly 9 tools that can be employed to get them moving again. I knew that at Flag EVERY OT Seven had to automatically do a six-month check and had to automatically do only one of these nine tools arbitrarily (which was the ‘confessionals’). I suddenly realized the extreme degree of out tech not only in my own Orgs but at Flag itself. I quickly called flag and even sent a Telex to David Miscavige asking for answers. After a week of no straight answers I called my mom to pick me up at 1:30 in the morning.
I left very cloak and dagger like and did not sign any contracts to be silent about what I saw.
The church logged onto Facebook and told my friends I was a suppressive person and should not socialize with me. Friends I knew for my whole life walked away without listening to anything I had to say.
One friend, who hasn’t done a course in years, said I shouldn’t just complain about the Church and actually do something about it and until then wouldn’t be able to talk to me… (and that was in response to receiving this story).
I quickly found how hard it was to make friends at the age of 28 when you have no money, few real world skillz and a whomping case of Candida.
I also had a hard time trying to get a college Pell grant since the church never filed my taxes, even though they told me they did.
***Data on Ideal Org Building Outpoints***
(I am only including data that I knew were a direct result of our own out admin and mis-management. This is also only the data I knew about.)
LA Org (The “Model” Ideal Org of Earth):
- Major roof leak! Anything more than a drizzle would cause a stream of water to drip through the fourth floor ceiling in 3-6 spots. Every time this happened I had better be there within an hour of it starting to downpour or I would get NAILED. It was my building so it was MY responsibility. My lack of training or funds to handle it was besides the point entirely.
- The Film room doors were given cheaper doors which allowed the sound float into the courserooms.
- Nothing special was done for the auditing room walls or HVAC- as result PCs in those rooms could hear nearby PCs.
- There was only one working sump-pump for both pit areas. Since neither one had a backup we were taking a seriously stinky risk. If one had gone, it would have overflowed, with septic sewage smells permeating through the org and local neighborhood for weeks.
- The High Trim expansion joints were filled in and resulting in hundreds of hours and dev-t of me and outside hired professionals trying to maintain the many bulges.
- Only HALF on the toilets and urinals were given sensors. As a result the public would assume they all had sensors and would not often flush. This cased a lot of urine build up as you can imagine. Even when making it to each bathroom every 4 hours.
- There was NO safe way provided for me to change the Dianetics reception lights. It was about 30’ high and I would have to grab a 25’ A frame ladder which had a broken foot that was sort of taped together with another piece of metal.
- The building started with FLAT PAINT. The original painters were paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for this overt product. All of the walls had to be redone, that task led by me, and of course without thanks.
- HVAC filled with fiberglass from renovations, estimate to clean was over $1,000,000
- HVAC ducts not redone so AC efficiency was seriously questionable. LA Org had to pay about $3000 a month for AC – yet many of the areas were uncomfortably warm and unusable.
- Every ideal Org had a testing center to help flow body traffic in except for LA Org. It was ironic that LA Org had to show how all the flow lines worked when it couldn’t show the very first one. A large test Center has been owned for more than 10 years but has never been renovated. Instead LA Org has been made to pay $13,000 a month to rent the shitty temporary test Center on Hollywood way. Maybe 10% of the ceiling tiles were in good order. The rug was damaged in most places from water stains and any time it rained you would see a labyrinth of plastic coming from the ceiling in order to funnel the many different leaks. The front gate was unusable but the poor staff would be seen morning and night spending 10 minutes screeching the thing open and shut. One of the receptionists, who was out there half the time, did not usually have dress shoes and instead had sneakers on, even with the new LA Org uniform. IN this way LA Org has had to spend $1.5 million, over the last 10 years, black PRing the name of Scientology on one of the busiest streets in the world. I saw it was recently shut and am very glad. That thing was such a DB piss hole that also drained a lot of time from the LA Org Estates.
- Due to lack of Estates personnel and staff cleaning you would occasionally see cockroaches in the Ground floor areas (Under the first floor).
- The Div 6 Public Folders rolling shelves got a face lift but the actual track and wheels were not repaired, as a result signs like “DO NOT MOVE THIS SHELF, IT CRACKS THE FLOOR” would be posted.
- During the LA Org opening the signs on the Mens and Womens BR doors were switched so DM could have a bigger restroom. The signs were left like that by the crew who switched it for me to figure out how to fix.
Inglewood Org
- Flat paint was still used on these walls even though I had proven how stupid that was ONLY because they were operating off of old plans. Hundreds of Sea Org man-hours and hundreds of thousands of dollars were spent and not a single person spoke up before the opening. It is already known that this Org was only going to have two SO members to maintain it, even though it was two separate buildings. It was not maintainable and did not have enough staff to maintain it. The resulting lack of activity cost the Inglewood Org 70% of its staff members.
- Their HVAC was also contaminated due to turning on the AC then there was still a lot of construction and remodeling going. Renting exterior AC units did not seem to be an option.
- There were only 2 SO posted to take care of it when it was known they needed at least 4.
- The floor tiles were never sealed during rennos and the new Estates personnel did not know how to do it. As a result they usually looked FILTHY and soaked up a ton of the staffs time.
- There were too few ‘walk on mats’ in the Org and as a result much of the dirt and filth would be free to flow into the org.
Phoenix Org
- Flat paint was used again ‘because they were operating off old plans’.
- There were several carpet stains during opening. The warranty on the carpets demand that no water extraction is done for six months. The estates manager will not be able to hot water extract those stains out, he will have to do some other bullshit process and get killed for his lack of product. By the time he is allowed to use the right process the stain will already have been long one with the carpet itself.
- Only 1 SO personnel was assigned even thought it was known it was a job for 4.
- There were no ‘walk on mats’ in the Org and as a result much of the dirt and filth would be free to flow into the org.
Pasadena Org
- Flat paint was used again ‘because they were operating off old plans’.
- There were too few ‘walk on mats’ in the Org and as a result much of the dirt and filth would be free to flow into the org.
********THE END********
The yelling chain of command prevents Sea Org members from being allowed to even find out what the out tech and off policy actions are for themselves and thus KSW.
If you know someone still in the church you have to remember that everything you say sounds completely insane. The only thing you can do is point LRH policy in the following way:
1. Establish the tough idea that they can think for themselves by asking them what they should do if they noticed an off policy or out tech action in their own Org. Per KSW should they “wait it out” or do something about it? (Without this established they will happily sit through a holocaust)
2. Have them read the reference on what empty orgs mean in relation to off policy and out tech.
3. Have them read HCOB “The no-interference zone” and point out that it was revised one year after LRH’s death but still forbids OT sevens from being interfered with. Tell them how all OT sevens at flag are given six-month checks and made to do confessionals across the board.
4. Ask them to contact flag and try to get a straight answer. Get them to specify the exact policy by LRH that counters it. Prep them by saying either we apply the HCOB’s or we don’t.
5. Let them take time to try to get an answer.
6. At this point they will be fed up with the church, realizing how much out tech there actually is for themselves. All of the outpoints they had been ignoring will then start to surface. All of the injustice actions they faced themselves are suddenly unforgivable. All the times they were made to buy BASICS or donate for their relatively small overts now seem like extortion, which they were.
If you intend to hold up signs and banners outside orgs, you should keep the above in mind. Here are some suggestions for signs that would work and get across. Remember that for every sign you have nearby that in any way seems critical, rumormongering, entheta or out PR in any way will make the rest appear likewise:
1. Get back in eval tech! No more acting blindly.
2. Read the HCOB “the no interference zone” – please KSW
3. KSW (That was most impacting to me as a SO member by far)
4. LRH says empty Orgs are a sign of out tech and off policy, what are you doing about it?
5. Don’t ignore the out points, KSW.
***********************
Thank you very much for reading this novel, I hope this helps lay some insight to the current Scientology scene and make it easier to get ethics in.
After being yelled at and told how shitty of a person I was for 2.5 years, I had a very low opinion of myself even once back in the real world. It took me months to bring myself up to the point to go back to college and learn some real life skills – like website programming.
Finally now I am making websites for myself and businesses, working to complete my book (which I hope will be the next Harry Potter ), studying Political Science and IR at college, going to $800 wealth building seminars (with amazing money making data), and getting back into Film Making for businesses and indie groups.
Feel free to follow my achievements at facebook and my website:
FaceBook.com/Jason.Barclay.777
WritersPhoenix.com (100% Custom made by me – except for music)
Me today….
ML,
Jason Barclay
Hi, Jason, I met you almost ten years ago. I remember you and a bunch of friends were all living in a house in Sun Valley. The guy who ran the house gave me the creeps, and the way you were all living seemed so crazy to me. Like drug addicts, without the drugs. You were all so young and so lost. You seemed like the nicest guy and a very gentle soul. I had no idea the hell you were going through, but I knew you weren’t in a good place. I’m glad you found your way out of that and I hope you heal from it. Therapy helps.
Well, I see things haven’t improved much over the years. Not a good indicator for a group selling “self Improvement”.
If Rebecca had smacked one of my kids in the back of the head, I would have been in the front of the building waiting for her. And I would have cheerfully done my time for my feed back. People can abuse your kids very covertly also, with out tech, wrong items and wrong indications. You practically have to be a watchdog committee to ensure your children do not get abused or aborted in the Scientology community.
Simply amazing where people are willing to go when they think nobody is watching them. No integrity whatsoever. These are the folk putting ethics in on the planet.
Glad you are free from that abuse. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!
Jason,
I’m glad to read that you are out and don’t waste your life anymore in that insane organization.
And thanks a lot for your enlightening report.
There is this simple principle that LRH wrote down : “hat don’t hit”. It is even in the green volumes. But it seems it has been completely forgotten by Sea Org top clowns ( the word “exec” does not really apply to them ) .
Your reports implies that this insane cult is dying from its violations of policy and plain logic and sanity. If it finally does, I will not waste a single tear. It has always been the style of the evolution to let unfit organisms pass away.
All the best to you !
Han Solo from Germany
Jason, thank you very much for this account and all the best in life with your newly found freedom.
Great article Jason. If you still have that health issue popping up you might try looking into mineral supplements, e.g. Dr. Wallach.
Jason,
Thanks for taking the time to write your account of what is going on in PT in the SO. I’ve been off lines for a while and you definitely have filled in some blanks. I’ve got some advice for you. You may feel you’ve wasted a lot of time this lifetime with the SO, but if nothing else, you must have learned how to be persistent. Once you get on he right track it doesn’t usually take too long to see some real success and you sound like you’re on the right track. This reminds me of my favorite LRH quote: “there’s no such thing as failure, only eventual success”.
I want to wish you the best,
Paul J
During the LA Org opening the signs on the Mens and Womens BR doors were switched so DM could have a bigger restroom.
There’s a raunchy joke in there, but in consideration of this being a family friendly forum, I’ll refrain from posting it 🙂
Welcome to freedom!
Great points on how to approach and handle people still trapped.
I’d love to see banners like:
LRH says empty Orgs are a sign of out tech and off policy, what are you doing about it?
What a wake-up call.
Lots of good comments here about your stunning narrative. But main I am totally aghast at your statement that a Delphi school would be forwarding the 100% pshrink-based method of students gaining conceptual understanding of words by guessing at the context. I’ve been a teacher in the public schools for years and have seen this device. It is pure evil. But used at Delphi? Years ago? Please tell me more.
I’m afraid that’s about it. As far as I know there reasoning was ‘since they are studying ‘wog’ tech then it doesn’t matter if they really get it or not. If i didn’t say anything I would have come back at least a second day. Also as far as I know, it’s illegal to house minors and not send them to school as a nonprofit. Maybe the over powerful religion clause cancels that tho?
I am at the tail end of your story Jason but very well done to you!
Your story is valuable for the so very many people just looking and getting to grips with their situations within RCS.
Mike. Magic idea to have this site. It looks like it takes a whole bunch of time and organize to get this done, so thank you very, very much.
Greenonwhite
Jason –
Welcome out, and very well done on your courageous write up. I know what that takes and I admire your courage and integrity for doing it.
I like your idea at the end about protest signs that you think would impinge, and I like your ideas about how to get through to the Scientology mindset to get Scientologists in the Church thinking and confronting again.
The communication lines you have to people still onlines are very valuable, because you can use those to achieve your purpose. Much of the Ethics Tech, and the whole of the PTS/SP technology was created to make sure that people like you could not reach onlines Scientologists and do what you are doing. But knowing this, you can get around these and still accomplish many good things for the freedom of Scientologists.
You’ve got a lot of good ideas.
Keep up the great work.
Alanzo
Thank you for writing this article Jason. It is very moving.
Many people still in will somehow get to read it and cognite
that all is not well in the C of $. We need more stories like
this, to help the people still brainwashed inside to get out.
The problem is that those on the inside have very limited or non existent chance to ever see this material. I was there for 18 years and I tell you it’s true. If they did there would be no CoS by now.
Hi Mike,I want to thank you for picking up this exact hat.I believe its absolutely vital that there be a platform like this where data can be acquired and reality can be generated while truth,if unpleasant, is revealed.Those busy removing themselves from the C of S need to arrive in a relatively calm space where the credibility of LRH is not in question.It is current management who have seen fit to head off into realms way outside original source intention. I have been a Scientologist for a very long time and I have seen a lot of strange things almost always generated by individuals.
I have taken on the personal purpose of creating/or finding and assisting a group that will use standard original LRH tech and will see to it that this is preserved for future generations.Although when I mentioned this to a very highly trained former Flag S.O.exec that person said”which version of standard tech”
Nonetheless I have had substantial personal benefit from the LRH tech I have made use of ,very especially in earlier years and I want to see my family and others be able to benefit from the same applications.So while it may be exciting to join in the pursuit of that that does not exist in Standard Tech I think I will keep my feet on the ground and assist with the application of the miracles that LRH created regardless of any perceived shortcomings of the Man.When I say miracles I mean that.I have seen and assisted with many as has any auditor.My OT levels are done and I too would like more,but not at any cost thank you.
Thanks again Mike.
Hi Jason, Fantastic write up and brilliant idea about the protest signs. You are so right and it is amazing that no one ever thought of this before. Actually, I think I used the wrong word to say this idea was brilliant. I should have said it was BRILLIANT with all caps on. Or maybe GENIUS. Or maybe both.
I think some people don’t realize this kind of story tells in microcosm what is the same story in the macrocosm. It is the broken, broken, broken, broken, broken down organization that is shameful in every single respect and really can not do ANYTHING right. They can’t even paint the correct finish of paint. When I was assigned to the RPF in 1990 (for saying that the problem with the int base was that the senior execs were intentionally mis-applying ethics to create an atmosphere of fear and intimidation) I was first put into the painting section. We painted everything in the Manor with eggshell finish. But they had non-Sea Org staff overseeing the construction. And Tom Martiniano was overseeing them.
You mentioned one notable enemy line — “I work for LRH. You don’t.” — that came straight from DM’s mouth and Mike Rinder can vouch for this. I heard DM say it and that’s where this asinine shit comes from. Various DBs who work for DM then want to look good, so they repeat whatever he says (trying to “be” DM) and the insanity is exported throughout the world just like that. The unconscionable wastage at ever turn — as bad as it was in these “Ideal” Morgues, that too was exported from the Int base where it was far worse.
To give you an example, a person named April Hall was given the task of building berthing buildings for all 700 staff of the Int base. But of course DM slashed the budget down to $4 and put a gun to her head to make it go right. So poor April got a bright idea — because there wasn’t enough money for lumber, she put the flooring rafters (these were 3-story buildings) 24″ apart instead of 18″ apart. All the buildings were framed in. Then she eventually blew and good for her. The walls were slowly sheetrocked. Finally it came time to put the tile floors into the bathrooms. Oops. It cracked. Floors on 24″ rafters are too flexible for tile. So everything inside every building had to be gutted and they had to start over from scratch with new rafters 18″ apart. Millions of dollars wasted. Meanwhile the whole reason for the buildings was to “save money” because staff were living off the base in apartments that were being rented in Hemet. So during the 10 years these berthing buildings were being built, the Int orgs continued to pay parishioner money not only to rebuilding all the on-base berthing buildings, but also to pay rent on the apartments being rented in Hemet, plus the six buses used to transport staff to and from those apartments 9 miles from the base, plus the diesel fuel, etc.
The whole of the CoS is like the USSR, where nothing worked right, ever line broken down, wheat rotted in the fields while people starved because no trucks were available to pick it up. David Miscavige is perhaps the worst, most incapable, wasteful, horrifically bad administrator of all time.
So glad to hear you are out. Your mom just added her name to the Indie 500 list yesterday. Congratulations to you both.
Steve
Hi Jason – congratulations on getting out. It never ceases to amaze me with the amount of abuse good people put up with. I am delighted with your accomplishments since leaving and by the way you look terrific.
Jason, I may have been one of those thirty year old lost members that you contacted. While I was surprised that anyone had remembered me after all those years, I nonetheless tried to use the call as an opportunity to educate you (or whatever poor soul was on the other end of the line) on what was going on in the church. The calls would usually come on a Saturday afternoon and the first thing I would ask about was the Florida weather. I would then go on about all the wonderful things that were going on in the outside world and how it must really suck to be sitting in a room calling people that wanted nothing to do with the organization or anything connected with it. I am glad to see you get out and welcome you to the world.
Jason, what an experience for a young boy to go through. Your story was very interesting, it made me sad and disgusted, but very happy that you got through it. Now you’re on the road to success with a bright future.
Jason.
You are a good writer. Even the little details like having to pay for light bulbs out of your own meagre pay. Some FBOS and Treasury Secs have been leaking information that an Org is left with 18.5% of all the revenue of the week, while 82.5% of all the revenue is ripped off by management, hence no toilet paper in the Orgs, and $15 take home pay for 80 hour slave labor weeks.
Someone, somewhere, some Bank Accounts are raking it in ! Can you shed any light on the finance side of how and where the money goes ?
I also want to thank you for giving me a good reality of what Alexander Jentzsch endured in his 8 year stint at CLO Wus even though Vicki Shantz was relatively kind to him. Thanks Jason.
Lets see, all Orgs (Including CLO) were forced to keep their ‘payments to flag’ stats up. Even if they were currently being threatened by DWP for not paying their utilities. Most of the time the payments to Flag stat had to remain much higher then we would receive in commissions. Our ‘commissions’ never seemed to be a part of our weekly FP.
Most of the time Flag would take 25% of what the org made (off the top, not of the net) for it’s “management”.
For the entire time I was there that base owed DWP about $500,000 for back utilities.
The month base DWP cost was about 120-160K – not including CC of course. I think they were loosing a lot of energy somewhere but they wouldn’t buy meters to try and track down where the costs were actually coming from.
LA Org was supposed to actually pay about 30K a month for utilities but were only paying 3K – forcing the other orgs to pick up the burden. Meanwhile LA Org was forced to spend 13K a month on a totally DB test center.
This in generally how I think LA Orgs FP went.
25% off the top to Flag
10% Off the top in FSM commissions
Flat 3k a week to utilities
Flat 1K a month for “staff welfare”
50% of “net” for events and promo
Staff pay was usually $10 a week for a 40hr week.
During the last year somehow the average staff pay rose about 3 times.
Remaining money would go to “everything else” – (Including staff pay) E.G. maintaining the building. My mom had to buy me toilet paper a few times because the money just wasn’t there for Estates. It’s not easy to try to take care of a $10,000,000 building with a combined $400 a week or so lol.
It was never a question to spend a little less in promo for the sake of fixing say, the front door.
In CLO, hard to say. But our FP#1 was like 80K and we made about 20K a week in commissions to other Orgs. The main way we made money was the call center, although we gave a lot of commissions to lower Orgs. The poor chefs were given random amounts of funding – and always under what was needed. And at the same time they would get REAMED if they didn’t keep a 4 week future menu in place.
I also think that’s why you’d get so much heat in the CLO if you didn’t make sales in the Call Center – Because you had a feeling you had to earn your own food and board.
Thank you so much for this information! This is the type of info that gives a very clear picture of what is really going on at the orgs, management wise. Your comment here reminds me of the one of the reports former ASHO Treasury dept staff member Mark Plummer posted on the internet back in 1997, where he describes the ASHO Day weekly FP, Finance and FP policies in the Sea Org, the typical FP at ASHO where the bottom line average was $6/ week staff pay and how the what policies were used resulting in meals of rice and beans sometimes. How the money was allocated and disbursed is quite an eye opener.
http://groups.google.com/group/alt.religion.scientology/msg/a72995151500a729
The toilet paper issue is one that goes way back to the late 70’s early 1980’s! As a public during those years, I and others used to have to bring our own to ASHO because there was never any in the bathrooms! Major outpoint.
Jason,
Your story is just insane and it is great that you left all of that behind. I’m very happy for you, your mom and your sister. I know you can have a great, normal life now.
Luis
Jason, what a long nightmare you had it in the SO; my heart is with you and all the souls you left behind in the similar position as you. I’m glad you are out and doing well. Congratulations.
“Not wrong in the slightest”.
Exactly. Mike can say so much in so few words. I am working on that.
Meanwhile,
Jason, you are a strong being. I am so sorry that you endured such abuse, especially when you were a child. No one should ever have to. Sea org wusses tell a big lie by redefining the word “toughness” and feeding it to Scientologists. They wanted you to believe that you were “tough” if you endured abuse or that they were “tough” when they abused others. They are not tough. They are wusses. They run when they come up against real “tough”. Real “tough” is strength, and it takes Love to be truly strong. Real “tough” doesn’t change or compromise principles or deny truth even when faced with dire consequences.
The sea org betrays the purposes of beings who want to dedicate their lives to forwarding Ron’s Tech. You and your mom have been through a lot and have a lot to sort out and you are doing it.
Here is a quote from Ron on the subject of being “tough” which has helped me sort stuff out. Notice what he says in the last paragraph. I hope that you and your Mom find this helpful too:
“KINDNESS: Our Most Valuable Asset
(OEC Tape: Attitude and Conduct of Scientology, 3 November 1955)
“The most valuable asset we have, actually, is our ability to understand, to be kind, to be decent.
Amongst us we have occasionally the feeling like: life requires that we be stern, life requires that we be ornery enough and mean enough to fire him: life requires that we’ve got to tell this preclear the next time we come that she must go, she must leave, she must never darken our door again. Life requires that. We must be stern, we must be mean, we must be occasionally ornery, and we must steel ourselves to take an unkind action. And we feel sometimes there’s something wanting in us, because we refuse to take this unkind action. We feel we are being cowardly that we are ducking back from our responsibilities. We feel the best way to solve the thing would be to be a little bit mean about it. Get the idea? We should be able to be tough…
“And so our kind impulse is muffled by the fact that we ‘know’ we had certainly better tell this person off…
“Well, I hate to unsettle a very stable datum, if it does unsettle it. But the only way anything ever does resolve is by letting your own kind heart reach through. That’s the only way it ever does solve.
“And it never solves by being tough. And believe me, ladies and gentleman, here talks a guy who in his college days was a top sergeant of the reserve marines, who drilled battalions. And when I tell you that it doesn’t pay to be tough, I’ve had experience.
“An officer in the war, and I can tell you that at no time, at no time during the entire war, did I ever see toughness win either in the field of discipline, the field of efficiency, or the field of getting a job done. I have never seen it win.
“…There is no substitute for liking people like liking people. There’s no substitute for reality like reality. There’s no substitute for communication like communication with good affinity and good reality. And that’s really close to a static. Do you understand?
“You go down scale from that you get into Dale Carnegie-ism. You ought to read that book sometime; it’s a real killer. It’s how to subvert ARC.
“All right. What do we have then? What do we have in these organizations? What do we really have of value in the organizations of Scientology?
“The only thing we have of value, actually, is Scientology, an understanding of life, increasing ability to communicate, a good concept and grip on reality, and the ability to like guys. That’s all you got.” – LRH
Jason, you have penned a darkly tragicomic look into the Church of Scientology. You are a very good writer; I could see your work here becoming the basis for a screenplay.
The high level of detail you put into this work is outstanding. I would like to read more as the details are fascinating. Roof leaks; missing sensors on urinals; flat paint in commercial buildings; David Miscavige needing a bigger bathroom; the gross inhumanity, etc. It is all serves to illuminate what life is really like inside the malicious and soul-killing Cult of Scientology.
Your narrative serves to confirm that The Church of Scientology has no idea whatsoever of what real management is or actually does. The Church is full of screaming robotic people who do not realize that they themselves are destroying the Church by their own incompetence and blindness.
No amount of SP’s inflict the amount of damage on the Church that the Church inflicts upon itself each and every day.
Right on!
Thanks for sharing your experience with us. I read it and go, ‘no way’, then I go, you can’t make this stuff up.
iForrest
Forrest — when it comes to the RCS, truth truly is stranger than fiction!
That is an understatement!
Is it not amazing how much better he looks ! Good indicator 🙂
I haven’t read the story yet… I am sure he tells it much calmer than I would. Like when he had second thoughts and called security from the secret location I had taken him to!
It is awesome being a family again and co-creating for the future.
Much Love, Jason’s Mom
Dear Jason’s Mom,
Yes, he looks so much better, so much healthier and happier 🙂 So glad you are together and growing as a family. So many others have been destroyed.
I hope you have read Jason’s story by now . I imagine it might not be the most comfortable thing for a mother, reading the story of her son’s life in Scientology ,but I can tell you that it’s definitely a story many of us can relate to and because of that, it will help many. You’ve got quite a son there.
Best wishes to you both,
Mary
Hugs Mary, I have now read the story and I knew much of the story. I supported him through it the best I could whilst he never complained, not even when his eyes were bloodshot. We never fully ‘disconnected’ when he was in. So when I had a bad experience I ended up looking up ‘Scientology’ on the internet I was shocked. It’s all good now. Time & diligent life creation will heal. Chris
Wow. Cussing-A.
You know this is true. You can’t have ever been involved on staff in any manner and then say this is BS. This is so true it hurts to read it. Thanks for the write-up Jason, and for your service.
I was on NSO staff at Flag and Pac in 1977 and 1984. This crap was happening. My mom was in the SO in the mid-70s. This crap was happening. My step-father was in the SO in the ’70s. This crap was happening. I have very good friends who were on staff in Detroit in the ’70s. This crap was happening. Of course, Jason saw it first-hand in the last fifteen years. It is worse now.
So, I have a question of Mike Rinder and other long-time SO members. Why? What the hell is this? How did this happen? I just spent an hour scanning OEC Vol 0 – trying to find a clue. There is a lot of wisdom in there. A lot. Frankly, there is a lot of BS, as well. I ran across the PL “Leaving and Leaves” that came out in 1976. All staff departures are caused by Overts or Withholds, according to this PL. But this is not true. Some are, yes. Not all. Then I ran across the HCOB “The Supreme Test.” This is the origin of “Cold Chrome Steel.” “Make it go right!” was the command of so many staffers shirking their duty on some other staffer, or making it possible to hire bums into the SO from the nearest rehab unit on Skid Row.
Then there is “Case on Post”. Look at HCOPL 27 June 1979 – “Crime Additions”:
“The following are crimes in Scientology. …
1. COMMITTING A PROBLEM
2. COMMITTING A SOLUTION WHICH BECOMES A PROBLEM
3. CASE ON POST.”
Come the cuss on! What BS is this, really? I am sorry, but this is LRH policy that, when taken in by people who have zero nuance or understanding of life, people, or anything else (like someone named, say, DAVID MISCAVIGE) can be used and has been used as goddamn hammer to crush any cussing person on any kind of whim at all. Pissed off at your senior? “CASE ON POST! RPF the bastard!!!”
Being on staff never had to be this way. Never. I know it can be a fun experience. It can be and should be a very rewarding experience to help people do better in life. Which is what Scientology is supposed to do, after all. I had fun on post when these policies were left the cuss alone.
The problem with these kinds of policies is that it opens the door wide to abuse and hatred. And guess what happened? Wide abuse and hatred in spades and beyond imagination. And stupid people were allowed to wield the atomic bomb of declaring people and forcing disconnection. With no real recourse. I can count the number of sane ethics/justice cycles I have seen on one hand – and the ratio is something like 10-1 crazy vs. sane. Recourse and real justice requires intelligence, nuance, and understanding, and taking time to do it right. Injustice and stupid application of dangerous policy only requires someone like Miscavige to smack a guy across the face and tell them to rot in the cussing hole. The hole was inevitable based on these policies.
To me, in order for Scientology to survive at all, these policies have to be stripped out of it. Stripped out. This is not an easy task – although, one way that we are doing is by cutting the Gordian knot and just rejecting the church and all its structure by declaring and being independent.
And I think that is the way it will go down when it goes down. DM, like Rajneesh, will sneak away in the dead of night when the fires are burning and it will all go up in smoke – because this crap is unsustainable.
Am I wrong?
Mark — not wrong, not in the slightest….
Mike Rinder +1
Mark, there are so many correct indications in your post, I hardly know which one to applaud most. In my view, the only way that things could have gone sanely with the Sea Org, is if they’d maintained the high recruitment quals they started out with. I’d say entry level quals should have been Clear and Class IV, at bare minimum. Such a group might actually have survived, and even thrived, under such policies. But as you correctly pointed out, look at what occurs when you try to run a group of aberrated, untrained people with such policies. Sheer madness and internal destruction within the group. Put such a group at the top of the food chain of an international organization, and complete meltdown ensues across the boards.
I like to think that if LRH were around today, that he’d radically alter the business model of the church to end this horrendous scene, but as it is, the situation is self correcting anyway. It’s finding its natural balance through the attrition of good and decent people who’ve chosen to unhook from the insanity. The thing cannot support itself without the cooperation and support of the good and decent. It will finally collapse under its own weight when enough of them have left. At that point, the church can choose to reform itself, or slide into the dustbin of history. Scientologists will go on.
I know LRH would be kicking some serious butt. There is no cussing way there would have been a GAT, a bogus re-editing of the basic books, or an “Ideal Org” strategy if Ron were around. In fact, the state of the church is proof that Ron meant what he said – he is not coming back to fix this mess, it is up to us.
I know that Ron would issue sweeping policy and then manage by exception. I think he issued the sweeping policies to make it easier to just apply the policy and move forward, but there are always exceptions. When he was around, he could take an exception and decree that in this case, the policy should not be applied or should be modified. Or clarified. But, he is out of here, and no one stepped up to take on that role. I know he was grooming people to do that – but he did not groom any intelligent tigers that would take out DM like a tiger takes out a goat.
I sort of feel earth was too chaotic for any pure religion to survive on it’s own at the time. LRH did say admin wasn’t his strong point and I think he needed a partner with an admin model stronger and purer then this earth could ever touch – I can’t imagine what they guy was going through just trying to prevent WW3 (since at the time nuclear war was actually very likely).
There are definitely one too many policies that were written and passed on. But the sad thing is LRH wasn’t the only one writing those policies. In the SO there was a ‘tech word’ for a policy someone ‘helped LRH write’. And LRH said only policies confirmed by him, his wife and the 3rd member of their council were standing policies (per HCOPL WHAT IS POLICY – ish) – But the lists of approved policies were no where to be found. So ANY policy written appeared binding and ‘written by LRH’.
In hindsight a founder should make the only binding ‘policies’ the video-recorded ones. And no one person would have ultimate control over the religion, just like LRH led it with his council. Im not sure if they had dependable video recording ability back then.
For now the ‘current church’ should be seriously studied so we can better answer the riddles of humanity from here out.
Right – but there is an admin scale which tells exactly how to look at and interpret policy. Goals and purposes are senior to policy. By the way, this is an excellent observation by Ron. Modern business practice is to have corporate strategy align with the company goals (which are almost always “make more money for the share-holders”), and then ensure that all projects, initiatives, policies, and job descriptions align with corporate strategy.
In the case of LRH policy, it takes a thetan to evaluate the existing policies against the overall goals and purposes of Scientology – and the church does not have that now. In the Indie world, that thetan is each one of us.
“I can’t imagine what they guy was going through just trying to prevent WW3 (since at the time nuclear war was actually very likely).”
I was wondering if you could explain what you mean by this.
Jason, so glad you are a free being again!
Thanks!
Mark,
In the HCOB “Blow-offs” 31 Dec “59 Ron does state ” One can treat people so well that they grow ashamed of themselves and knowing that they don’t deserve it, that a blow is precipitated, and certainly one can treat people so badly that they have no choice but to leave, but these are extreme conditons and in between these we have th e majority of departures; the auditor is doing his best for the PC and yet the PC gets meaner and meaner and blows the session…..leaves because of their own overts and witholds”
I would say we are looking at an extreme condition.
Hi Ingrid! Yes – I am very aware of Blow Offs – and that one line in that HCOB is the most overlooked liine in Corporate Scn. That subtlety was lost from 1959 to 1976. There is no mention of that in “Leaving and Leaves”:
“As the actual reason behind blows is overts and withholds, the excuses for leaving are usually simply justifications and are actually a third-party action of associates, usually false reports.
“Therefore, informing fellow staff members and others that one is leaving is hereby properly labeled a suppressive act.”
and
“All persons whose contracts expire without renewal and all persons who wish to leave are to be security checked… This will remove the overts and withholds inevitably connected and so relieve the person and the org of the usual justifications and false reports.” (emphasis mine).
So, according to this PL, Jason is an SP despite how badly treated he was, because it is IMPOSSIBLE for him to have blown without having overts and withholds.
This policy is wrong – or, since the other way you can interpret an overt on Jason’s part is “failing to take on the entirety of the craziness that is the Church of Scientology and single-handedly making it go right to correct all outnesses, injustices, and stupidities of the corporate church, but instead being selfish and blowing his post leaving it to his overworked superiors to make it go right and continue to wipe DM’s ass with TP from the ladie’s room” – then the policy is just plain impractical. It certainly does not mean that. We are PTS because we are on this planet. We are all committing overts because we are not dedicating all waking moments to clearing the planet. That will not wash anymore.
It comes from selectively using “policy” to nullify and dominate. Take another look at HCO PL Blow-offs. There is a line in there where LRH says something like, you can also treat people so badly that they have no other choice but to leave. That’s policy, too! But how often is THAT little gem ever get used or taken into consideration. Yes, people do leave areas where they feel they have committed harmful acts. But they ALSO leave places where they are being abused! It’s right there in that policy letter (PL). Hobby-horsing on the first when the second is the case is a classic example of selective application so as to nullify and dominate by wrong indication.
Why does this occur? See HCO PL ‘How to Prevent an Ethics Officer from Doing His Job’.
How do those maladies become systemic? Just by injecting a paramilitary culture into a grassroots movement for the sake of expedience.
Mark, I don’t think any policy letters will be stripped out of Scientology, so much as those who desire to continue to audit people, will just ignore most policy and concentrate on some of the very basic ones. Same with ethics. Yes, to successfully audit someone, you do indeed need to make sure they are not PTS and you can’t run a group, no matter how small, if you don’t handle any intention that exists to destroy your group or even to lower its effectivenes.. And that will basically be it. Very few people will do any of the “wierd stuff” – like “committing a problem” is a CRIME? Yeah, right. I can’t tell you how many seniors I had in the Church who spent 90% of their time committing problems for the few staff who were actually working to produce auditing and training, but had to devote X amount of their time to their incompetant seniors running their incompetant programs from THEIR incompetent seniors ….. Well, I guess when all else fails as far as producing any VFPs, just ask for money and the sheeple will take out their credit cards if you just threaten them enough.
You are 100% right. And yes ONLY the kind of destructive policies get applied but those do get applied relentlessly by the crazies. But it gets much better. You should see some of the advises!
Jason, that was one of the most heart rending tales I’ve read in some time. Sadly, experiences (like yours) in the Sea Org, have become all too common in the last three decades. During the lunatic reign of David Miscavige, they’ve become the rule, rather than the exception.
How any relatively sane person remains in that (alleged) organization today, is beyond my reality. It has literally become a violent insane asylum of people madly destroying each other like rabid animals. No one is going free in there. No one on staff is actually helping to achieve the original goals and purposes of the religion. Every single participant there is serving but one goal — to enrich and empower the ruthless dictatorship of one man.
I don’t blame you one bit for sneaking out the back door like you did. Leaving through the front door is a whole ‘nother level of hell, as many ex-S.O. members have attested to. You paid your dues. You had every right to leave a game you no longer wished to play — on your own terms, and at the time of your own choosing.
Welcome to Independence, my friend. If you still have the goal, you can now experience the true gains of unadulterated, On Source Scientology, the way it was meant to be. Good luck!
“50 ways to leave the Sea Org”
Slip out the back, Jack.
Make new plans, Stan
Don’t need to be coy, Roy,
Just listen to me.
Get off the bus, Gus,
Don’t need to discuss much!
Just drop off the key, Lee,
Just get yourself FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=298nld4Yfds
Good song, too!
Your description of your dorm sleeping scene had me really lauphing as i exerienced much the same. You put that many guys in a room, and your gonna get some irritating crap to deal with. In my case we had the pleasure of having the IAS reg’s in our dorm when the blew into town to fleece the flock. Those assholes had 10 times the mest of the average staff member (laptops, various gadgets, expensive clothes/shoes, nice food treats, etc) and invariably they would spread it all over their bunk and around it, and also, they never ever made up their bunks. When security would do a birthing check, then everyone else caught hell for the sloppy condition of their bunk and area. When the IAS assholes were in our dorm we either had to clean up their area and make up their beds for them or security wouldnt let us go for CSP time or liberty day off. Their arrogance in that situation made me forever loath the IAS.
I loved that they switched the Men’s and Women’s room labels at LA Day when DM was there because he needed more room in the stall! I would love to know the back story there.
Unfortunately, as the Building Manager, I was never let in on the ‘plan’ to change the bathroom signs for DM. When I asked about all I got was shrugs like, ‘changing em back aint my problem’. I also had no idea how to handle and re-apply signage. So the signs remained in the wrong places for about 3-4 months. Random men would ask why the mens BR had a tampon dispenser and the women didn’t.
How crazy. This one incident sums up the cult of DM to me: David Miscavige can’t even use a men’s bathroom. It is so idiotic. It is hard to gather the mind-set of people who would do this! I mean – if the men’s rooms were not adequate for Mr. David Miscavige at the World Standard Ideal Org, then they not up to Mr. David Miscavige’s lofty standards in any other Ideal Org in the world!. Therefore, Ideal Orgs are not Ideal, because DM has to scurry to a women’s room to take a pee! But, rather than correct the outrageous inadequacy of the Ideal Org men’s rooms, some moronic genius just swapped signs! And what is really telling is that DM fell for this, hook, line and sinker. He probably thinks ALL men’s rooms have tampon dispensers and receptacles! And I am now thinking that he hasn’t seen a urinal in years! Wow. I am guessing it is because urinals are too exposed and make him feel inadequate when peeing next to tattooed ex-Meth dealers.
Yeah, not sure if this is in the story, but there were many weeks had to handle other people underwear drawers – fold em and everything – eww!
God what a mess. Add to it the fact that, as the MODEL Ideal Org, executives of other orgs are supposed to train in LA Org to learn the ropes for running their own orgs. This ensures the insanity and epic fail quotient will spread to many other orgs as well. Sounds like the “Action Confusion Formula”:
“Doing the things that lost, not on-policy things that won before.”
Hi Jason,
Sorry you went through all that. Your story sounds much like mine when I was in the Sea Org between 2001 and 2004. The church hasn’t changed anything despite the fact that the same things they have been doing for decades have failed to work.
My parents wouldn’t listen to me when I tried to tell them what I went through during my time in the Sea Org. I am disconnected from them now because I was declared for writing an anonymous story about my time in the Sea Org online. The church tracked me down and showed my parents the story. I saw my declare but I couldn’t have a copy of it.
I hope that people stop joining this church so that they aren’t put through the same heartache that so many of us have.
BTW, your idea of a protest referencing the policy violations occurring is a great idea! The policy reference that your Mom told you to read about the non intereference zone is what got you to look and that and otherr references will get more Scn’s to look probably more than anything.
Wow, Jason!
Thank you so much for sharing your story! This gives me new perspective and understanding on what it’s like to be a young, enthusiastic and caring staff member and how difficult it is especially when you really want to help!
I’m sorry for what you had to endure but, I feel confident in the idea that you have helped immensely by sharing your story.
I’m glad for you, that you are doing so well in life now. Ans, thank you for making yourself available to help others. You’re a great young man!
Thanks again,
Laura Ann
Congratulations on just getting the bleep out of the nuthouse Jason.
You did it right in just slipping out the back, Jack.
I notice you look much better now and I’m sure you feel much better!
Hi Jason,
We don’t know each other because I was in the SO (Flag) from 73 to 81, the time when I left, the time when David Miscavige took control of the SO while LRH was ill and unable to do anything. What you experienced was David Miscavige’s version of the SO and Scn, which were a complete departure from qhat it used to be before Miscavige. Well done for escaping, but let me tell you, you have never experienced true scientology. If, after your ordeal you are still interested in Scientology, my advice is that you start from the beginning, reading LRH’s un-fucked up version of DMSMH and the next LRH’s materials which are available in lots of places. Avoid any matterials written after 1982.And if you are no longer interested, which I could understand, just let it go and carry on with your own life outside of the bubble.
Sincerely said
Alex
I still love Scn, I just don’t have any ‘zest’ to continue it atm. When I first left the SO I was critical of everything. Now I have a strong respect for anyone continuing to practice and train others. The data I’ve learned from courses will for sure help my story telling though!
Great write-up, Jason. Unbelievable, the insanity you endured. This is valuable documentation as to how far over the edge this thing got to. As an org DSA, having observed the back-lines at PAC while there as outer-org trainee, I can personally relate to a lot of it, but I can see that the daily reality was far worse than I could imagine. (Loved your escape plan – bless your dear Mom for driving the get-away car!)
Thank you for having the courage to get out of there, to recover, and to tell your story so gracefully.
Best of luck to you!
Congratulations Jason on surviving what sounds like a truly spirit crushing experience. Thank you so much for adding your voice to those who’s stories are day by day exposing the tiny tyrant and his abuses.
It’s folks like you that keep us in front of those Orgs every week educating the public. With much respect PJS
Hi Jason, quite a gut wrenching account of abuse towards someone who is just trying to do the right things and gets hammered for it. Thanks for getting your story out. Glad to see you are doing well.
Well done, Jason. Just goes to show how any Scientologist with common sense and the willingness to look can see the insanities in DM’s corrupt network. I won’t even give it the honor of calling it “Church of Scientology” anymore because it’s not – quite the reverse.
I wish you and your family every success.
Hi Jason,
Thank you for speaking out and describing the madness!
When you wrote: “I also knew that if a light bulb was out but my stats were up I would not be able to take a day off”, I had to laugh. It’s basically a sad situation but at the other side a so hilarious example of the insanity and off-policy (I was in the SO, so I have full reality on such occasions, kind of déjà vu).
Congratulations for escaping and building up a new life. I wish you all the best for your future!
Karola
Wow Jason, that is quite some story. I laughed sometimes, cried sometimes and then laughed again at the end to see you smiling!
Thank you all! I’m impressed y’all made it through my novel!
If anything there does help any activities then great. If anyone needs more specifics etc just let me know 😉
It’s such a shame to see such a powerful religion undone by one man and the homosapian will to follow.
I remember a policy where Ron said tech was his fortey not admin. I wonder what could have been done in tech to prevent what happened?
I think all this touches on the universal problem of how to establish a clean group who remains so throughout the ages…
Best,
Jason
Jason, I left the Sea Org in 2000. You can read my story on the free zone if you google my name. There are many of us who left Scientology but still consider themselves Scientologists. So the solution is to keep doing what we have been doing, exposing the atrocities of Miscavige and his tyranny. The more we get and the more organized we get, the easier it will be. There is already enough admiration poured towards that direction. Your’s is one more theta beam to get the monster to disintegrate.
Jason, you look great! I was fascinated by your story and read it beginning to end. I did my own time as an estates manager in a CL V org way back when and spent another 13 years in the SO. Good on ya for figuring it out and getting out. Your observations are spot on and your ability to communicate them in writing is excellent. Hope it helps others take to their feet!
Linda
Hello Jason,
thank you for telling the story.
Also thank you for the advices at the end of your writing re “holding up signs and banners outside orgs”. This is a very wise adivice.
I also wish you all the best for your writing career. 🙂
I will check out your http://www.WritersPhoenix.com homepage and read what you have to tell about writing.
All the best to you!
Thank you so much for taking the time do write your thorough report. It is important that people know the truth. So many kids have left the S.O but they are silent. The best of Scientology does shine through and is being applied in the Independent Field. Well done on taking control of your life and deciding on Freedom!
Jason, thank you very much for writing up this story of yours. I think 3rd dynamic aberration is in full swing here. Your write up is so clear and thorough that one can only see that in the flurry of “production” good people are butchered. For the sake of buildings we are victimizing people. I was fascinated to read all the details you give in a very analytical way of how things were going wrong. As if there was no real communication between the staff. And that was a reality. I recommend a good tape from the PDCs, I think it’s number 35 and is called DEI Scale (Desire, Enforce, Inhibit). the church now is at Inhibiting the Tech. People in it and around it are inhibited to get the benefits of the Tech.
thank you for coming out and speaking out. And thanks for differentiating between the tech and the way the church is run. Very important.
Hi Jason, I’m glad you finally wrote up your story, the place is inhumane as ever, thanks to the cruel rein of David Miscavige, such a waste of good people. I’m glad you are out and doing well now!
Hi Jason, I think the track record you provide for inadequate building and maintenance management of Idle Orgs may be relevant for local authorities. It seems to me that in particular some of the issues in the LA Org (sump-pump, unsafe replacement of fixtures) might be worthwhile to report.
Wow. That is quite a story. It says so much about the mentality that has spread through the Scientology structure. I loved your observation about the yelling chain of command. The thing that you can’t see on that chain is where it starts. You never suspect it starts at the very top with a totally coo-coo for coco pops “leader”. Thank you so much for sharing this. Congratulations on starting a new life. You have my best wishes!