Patter is a term used in scientology to describe a script that is given to people to say out loud. According to Wikipedia: Patter is a prepared and practiced speech that is designed to produce a desired response from its audience.
Whoever wrote this has a misunderstood word. He or she thinks the word is “pattern” because it seems to make more sense to them. It might be a “pattern” if it was an “outline” of things to say. In fact, this is a verbatim script.
Learn how to parrot this, call enough people who tell you “Yes, put me down again as a confirmed for the damn event and tell everyone to stop calling me” and you can even earn yourself a commendation…. Wow.
Of course, the hype in here is monumental, unprecedented and unparalleled. Can you imagine possibly living up to what is said? Everyone knows and is complicit in the inflation of claims in scientology. They all know that everything today must be bigger, better and more spectacular than yesterday….
Jeez, I cleared “patter” when I was 10 years old on the Comm Course. Don’t Sea Org members do Scientology?
(no, they don’t)
It’s the same old bullshit “pattern” from a dying money grubbing religion (and I use that word loosely).
What is a commendation?
Oh, a commendation is a simple letter stating the recipient was obedient and did what he was ordered to do.
Where they give you a certificate for doing something the cult wanted you to do.
scientology can’t ever use any word not a superlative: it makes the cult ridiculoius as soon as one detects it. I’ve even written to LRH when I was still a good scnist, one more letter he did not dare to answer. He could’nt think normally, since he was alcoholized by his whiskies AND by his own successes, even if those were not so great, after all, he was very far from a multi-levels billionaire. DM is worse, regarding images and style: his taste for ,gooldened things or big buildings asserts his own petiteness!
Do you know that over seven billion people on this planet have absolutely no idea how important Dave and the IAS are?
I’m suspecting that 99.99999999999999999999% of them will never find out, nor care.
Someone once said that the not quite bright have a bad button on self-importance.
That’s my comment of the week.
Also, out of sequence: please confirm yourself and then we will tell you the activities that will take place.
Outstanding absurdity.
Pattern • Patter • Pattern.
It’s a signal:
S • O • S
“The IAS sponsored Ideal Org of London”. IAS sponsored = despite the UK being the world’s fifth largest economy there aren’t enough British Scientologists to fund even one flagship Org so we had to get the IAS to supply the funds for it.
“5-star dinner by the premier caterer of England” – always the need for hyperbole. There isn’t any one single “premier caterer” in England. There are many excellent caterers, there are probably some awful ones, too. I wonder who they’re using.
My favorite is when they’re promoting a singer or entertainer of one sort or another, it’s always INTERNATIONALLY RENOWNED!!!
Yeah, her brother who lives in England listens to her on YouTube.
The “Premier caterer” is likely some poor guy/gal they can spring from the RPF for the night who flipped burgers for a week when they were a teenager. Their crew would be whatever warm bodies they can dig up.
Well I guess it is a pattern. They call, and people scramble to hide wherever they can. The mere fact that they have to go through all this trouble to get people to come to their events, shows you how much people don’t want to go.
Went to a Dodger game the other night. Thousands and thousands of happy people there. Not one of them was called.
I’ll bet no one wants to go to these events. Why the fuck would they? It’ll just boil down to fundraising…
Yes, it’s enforced unpleasantness. It’s been that way for a long time.
You start running out of excuses….”Uhhh, I have to go feed my gold fish” ” Yea, I was on my way to the event when I saw a car crash. And cause I know no one else could handle it, I had to stop and attend to it” ” I wanted to go, but since my stats were down on my Basics home study course, I had to stay home and get my stats up”. Here’s the one I give them now… You and your god damn event can both go fuck yourselves”.
So, let me get this straight. They are emailling people who may or may not have agreed to go to the event themselves and telling them to get 5 more people to come. All for a commendation.
Pass.
Of course I wonder how much pressure someone who receives this email would feel just to confirm themselves and how many of them have become smart enough to simply ignore the email. — oops! it must have gone to my spam, they say on October 10.
It would show in the E-meter xD
“Cultural epicenter”? Saint Hell? You know, there’s an actual definition of “cultural epicenter” that’s accepted worldwide, and that’s a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Those are cultural epicenters by definition, because they’ve shaped humankind in ways for the better and provided a touchstone for entire cultures. They are considered precious artifacts of humankind worth preserving for future generations; witness the outcry when ISIS started blowing up parts of Palmyra. Saint Hell will never, ever become one of them. And if you tell me that it should because it was the “home of Mankind’s Greatest Friend”, I’ll consider violence against you.
So take your “pattern” and shove it up your collective asses.
Makes more sense if they delete ‘cultural’ and just leave ‘epicenter’, as in the focal point of an earthquake or similar total humanitarian disaster.
Don’t tiptoe around the subject, let us know how you really feel? ??
This “historical rebirth of a cultural epicenter” is probably just them buying the old KCET
studios.
Dave,
KCET is more like afterbirth. Viacom has worked out scenarios for selling Paramount Pictures. But, valued at between 8 and 10 billion, THAT is out of your dwarf league.
Oh, Espi, you are SO subtle! LOL
Call-in pattern? Done & done! Our grandson’s room is a beach theme. Ummm, that is what they’re talking about…..right?
Seashells and stuff too? Driftwood is always cool. A little C grass matting here and there plus an old glass fish net float or two never goes astray either. Suspended piece antique fishnet maybe? It’s good to see you’re on the ball with the right priorities Dude – I too am glad you post here!
Wow! You should work in interior designer, I Yawn! You’re good! Really good!
OSD,
What! No Scottish theme!
No Bagpipes for Babies?!
No e-meter with baby sized cans?
No miniature naval uniforms?
How is wee YSG? (Young Surfer Grandson)
He’s a little more than a month old. My screen saver has him in a bassinet with a shirt reading, “Ladies I have arrived.”
same ole same ole boiler plate
no results.
Oh yes… “Call in confirms,” who doesn’t remember that crock of crap?
It is with embarrassment by the bucketful that I can remember staff musters where as adults we “seriously” went over the confirms patter (even twinned up and practiced it out loud) and the associated bs that makes up a Scientologist’s social commitment and interaction to, with and for our fellow human beings. That glassy eyed, false enthusiasm and steel hard glint in the eye determination to be part of the wrecking ball that is known as Scientology is too much to contemplate today without the threat of a severe bout of nausea.
What was I thinking, acting and doing? Geezers… aw well. Could be worse… we could still be in I suppose?
Thank God for computers, the internet and having a conscience!
Maybe you should spend time in your bathroom, I Yawn. You never know when the nausea is going to hit.
At my age – it’s my second home anyway!
I heard that!
I-Yawn,
Don’t forget the over the top laughter, the ‘I’m having the best time of my life’ glee and the ‘jump up and down because COB is making a speech’ happiness!
The ‘everything is so fabulous what could possibly be wrong’ look.
For an example, look no further than the cackling Tom Cruise.
Katie Holmes was often criticized for being robotic and having a 100 yard stare. I don’t blame her one bit. If that is the alternative to looking like a jackass like her former husband, I’ll take it
Smart girl in the end that Katie Homes. Her trail to TC must have been a nightmare camouflaged with tinsel & gold dressing for her though! Such is Hollywood and their lifestyles.
The ‘cleb’ entertainment will probably include a Chilli-EB and Joy Villa sing off. Maybe Travolta or Cruise can sing back up. Would that not be a treat?
I always thought that ‘patter’ was just a way of speaking. Disk jockeys ‘patter’ all the time. So are ‘patter’ and ‘natter’ related and how should one clay demo them?
Just demo them till you have a full conceptual understanding. Wait till you get a PFFFFFT! or a OH MY GOD! moment.
Then go to the Examiner write a Success Story about how this was the most EPIC, MONUMENTAL action you’ve ever experienced and that you will never be the same. Better than OT XXV would be a nice thing to say.
Oh and finally don’t forget to thank COB, the most intelligent, compassionate, understanding, blah, blah, blah…….oh and that other guy, Ron something, if you happen to remember.
The Oh My God moments usually occurs in beds. But, the PFFFTs are quite common…
Celebs are like modern-day “canaries in the coal mine” when it comes to alerting us to what’s no longer cool or trendy in the La La Land of pop culture and beyond. They’re very quick to distance themselves from anything and anyone who their refined sense of impending unpopularity detects, lest they become uncool by association.
Generally speaking, that’s a regrettably superficial and narcissistic way of being in the world, but for our purposes here in keeping tabs on the rate at which $cn is contracting, it’s one that may prove quite useful as a measuring tool.
$cn celebs have been notable in their absence from a whole host of recent ribbon-yanking ceremonies in the aftermath of a series of direct hits to the cult’s image that have made it a regular media target for derision and expose. Instead of being seen by the public as “The coolest religion on earth,” the cult seems to have earned itself a reputation for being the “cruelest religion on earth”.
Any celeb who’s concerned about his/her public image (and name me one that’s not) couldn’t help but note the level of stench pervading the pop culture atmosphere there. So, if Tom “3rd BIGGEST Being” Cruise, John “I never kissed that man, not one time!” Travolta, Kirstie “I bite the heads off of bats for fun” Alley and the rest of that rogue’s gallery of used-to-be and wannabe celebs continue to stay away from big events like the upcoming IAS Anniversary Event, then that’s not a good sign for the cult at all!
$cn ‘jumped the couch’ quite awhile ago in the public’s eye, so it’s way past time that all those Kool-Aid guzzling celebs who’ve been cruising on that ship o’ fools notice how low in the water their fave religious vessel lies and the hurricane they’re sailing straight towards.
well formulated.
When I get a cold call from an insurance salesman I just hang up without speaking.
After reading today’s post I really need a throw up assist. Anyone?
Got the bucket ready…
Is receiving a ‘commendation’ sufficient reward for the punishing task of confirming five people to yet another horrid scientology event? It depends on the degree to which your self-esteem has been systematically eaten away, rendering you hungry for approval and ‘commendations’.
What would scientology be without the inferior shit tubes looking up worshipfully at the superior shit tubes from whom a word of praise yields orgasmic satisfaction? In scientology parlance the superior shit tubes are called, “OT’s” or “civilization builders”. Mere ‘commendations’ aren’t enough for them. They require a ceremonious presentation of rhinestone-studded trophies measuring no less than the height of the most superior shit tube of them all.
5 new confirms = a commendation.
What wouldn’t a galley slave do for one of those?!!!
Almost anything, I guess.
The assumed close makes my PTSD flair up. It’s everywhere in this attempt to ensure there are enough people at this event so david miscavige gets the applause He deserves and doesn’t look like the fool He is.
And the grammar! “…will be an Anniversary to remember with.” Ouch. My head!
C’mon Mary! Imagine all the pressure these SO staff get to bring in people for this event!
Oooookaaaaaayyyyy. There is some relief in knowing that and that it must bring some of them a little closer to blowing – I mean “being removed.”
“Relocation” is a good word!
The “IAS-Sponsored Ideal org of London”? Does that mean that London isn’t making enough to pay the rent or keep the lights on?
“The IAS-sponsored Ideal org of London”? Does this mean that US scilons are mandated to pay for and donate real estate to Co$ for the benefit of DM but IAS pays for that overseas?
mmm… I don’t think you’re appreciating the bigger picture River. First there’s Hubbard (PR in DM’s mind – as there can only be one) then there’s DM and of course tail end Charlie is TC – all the rest are minions of varying monetary or labor value.
It’s a broad world and even broader universe, what’s a little geography got to do with it? The Scio checkbook is a creation of epic, often mystical but always gargantuan proportions. It deals with matters well beyond the scope any of us mere mortals to comprehend.
The IAS has to pay for it in the UK to avoid embarrassment when Dave’s Best Buddy Cruise visits London. If it were left to the 2000 or so British Scientologists to fund a flagship org in the capital it would be about the size of a garbage bin behind Euston Station.
Wasn’t it rumored that, a couple of years ago, Cruise popped into London Idle Morgue unannounced and had a shit fit because it was deserted?
You’re right, though. The IAS’s tight-fisted wallets open up if Cruise is somehow impacted. I know of at least three Idle Morgues that opened up solely because of Cruise: London (where he was filming at the time), Bogota (ditto), and Madrid (because he was auditioning Penny Cruz to be Wife #3 and wanted somewhere nice to convert her to his laughable excuse of a religion). This is a pattern. We all know that Inglewood is Idle because Issac Hayes, FSM rest his soul, was bitching and moaning about Scientology and African-Americans; the same reason is why they put Harlem on the runway (and which got put on the back burner when Hayes died).
If that’s the case, then why aren’t they celeb-feeding with Bart Simpson? Not big enough? Or is she pouring too much money into that walking embarrassment known as Valley to have her stop and get an ego-pat?
Scientology. The religion whose adherents jump up on sofas and scare the shit out of prominent talk show hosts.
It’s also what magicians say to misdirect people. A bit too close to the truth, eh Ron?
I checked “patter” with dictionary.com
1. meaningless, rapid talk; mere chatter; gabble.
2, the usually glib and rapid speech or talk used by a magician while performing, a barker at a circus or sideshow, a comedian or other entertainer, a vendor of questionable wares, or the like; stylized or rehearsed talk used to attract attention, entertain, etc.
3. amusing lines delivered rapidly by an entertainer or performer, as in a comic routine or in a song.
4. the jargon or cant of any class, group, etc.
Seems like numbers 1&4 most closely describe in inanities that scio has finally chosen as its method of “communication”. And, as you point out by outlining in red, Mike, they’ve run out of descriptive words, now using the same ones year after year. But what can one expect from people who essentially have no education to speak of?
Scientology used to be staffed by college dropouts.They have been replaced by highschool dropouts and hapless third world staff.
Where’s the patter for the re-confirm and the re-re-confirm?
It’s nothing like the patter of the re-re-re-re-re confirm…
Those damn held down sevens pop up all the friggen time, geezers they make things complicated!
Oh, wait. I found it.
CALLER: Hi, I’m calling from the Church of Scientology to re-re re re re re re re re re confirm your attendance at the…………
PUBLIC: Damn it, stop calling my house! I told you I’d be there about half a million times! Now don’t call here again!(CLICK).
Curious to see how much attendance will be down from last year.
If anybody has a guestimate how % much 2015 was down from 2014.
this will help us to more acurately predict the estimated lifespan of this terminal (but very loud and obnoxious) patient.
They’re having to confirm people to confirm people who may or may not have confirmed yet? LOL
The whole damn thing is on life support Dave, we’re just waiting for you to trip over the plug.
Lights out…
Drinks served…. (well, here at least lol 😀 )
I’m on my way. I’ll take a bottle of Merlot…
Get a room you guys!
“Patter” is the term used to described SELF HYPNOSIS. Very clever – that ole turd L Con Hubbard!!
Common uses in churches for millennia. The priest/pastor makes an utterance, and the congregation responds. Very rote teaching, something like Pavlov’s dog almost. No thinking needed.
Same as the way children are made to memorize the Koran in madrassas. They repeat it over and over in a kind of chant while rocking back and forth. No understanding required.
Just more religious hypnotism.
Oh, please don’t. Next you’re going to tell us that “Scientology is no worse than any other faith.” and “Well, I’m not fooled. I’m an atheist.” Dig it. Even atheists can have weird ideas. Like Stalinism.
Scientology is one of the worst religions out there, perhaps the worst although there are some strong contenders; ever heard of the Moonies or Heaven’s Gate?
Steve Hassan’s BITE model is a way to measure just how bad a religion, or any organisation is. BITE stands for how much the organisation seeks to control: Behaviour, Information, Thoughts and Emotions. All religions and many organisations seek to do all four to varying degrees. It is up to the individual to decide just how much an organisation is seeking to control these aspects and how.
Military services always seek to control behaviour, they want to make you capable of killing another human being. To some degree they also control thoughts and emotions but generally do not control information; they usually do not discourage looking at “bad data”. As to how bad that makes the military services is subjective.
Scientology demands a certain behaviour, you must behave in a certain way to be a good scientologist and if you do not fellow scientologists will rat you out using a Knowledge Report. Scientology discourages reading “entheta”, certain information, because that will destroy your case and you will have to submit to “ethics”. Scientology encourages self policing of thoughts using the tone scale, to be good you need to always be uptone and doubt is bad. Scientology also controls emotions, you must always be upbeat because if you are not then you have done something wrong to “pull it in”, ethics again.
Other religions also have practices similar to scientology that are practiced to vary degrees. Jehovah’s witnesses also use the ultimate sanction of disconnection from family, loved ones and friends only they call it disfellowshipping; unlike Scientology they do not deny this practice and openly promote it. They do not usually harass ex-members to the degree Scientology does.
Not all religions are nearly as bad as Scientology, but Scientology does not have the monopoly of being the only destructive religion in the world. All religions seek to influence all four aspects of Steve Hassan’s BITE model, that is the nature of religion but obviously some religions are more benign than others.
Also remember that controlling aspects of the BITE model is not exclusive to religion. The military is an obvious example, as are pyramid marketing schemes (or scams). Likewise so are self help groups and alcohol and drug dependency support schemes (Narconon); each group needs to be measured against it benefits to determine if it is damaging in the long run or not and there is a lot of subjectivity in it.
The rabbit warren goes pretty deep with a lot of that stuff you mention. Just how much you can stomach is the real game. But it is not for the faint hearted. Conspiracy within conspiracy within conspiracy is often a game only fit for heads of states (with very high end lawyers), bankers and business familes. Profit and money are very good motivations but not necessarily the end game, it is for most people the reasoning behind most things uncomfortable but not all, sex rears its head too as gross when used as a criminal motivation but overall it’s on a lower level. Power is the ultimate game but it knows no borders.
An example of somewhat gross social behavior is when the 3rd Reich stormed into Poland and across Europe what sort of trucks were they using? They were supplied by Ford mostly, plus Ford contributed to turbine technology used in the V2 rockets – nothing like a nice little profit on a global scale. Makes ya think which side some are on. Henry Ford was even awarded the Grand Cross of the German Eagle from the Nazi’s.
Military “think’ varies from country to country. I spent a little time with the Indonesian Army once. Scared the crap out me just to be with them. Live firing and artillery used in infantry training and the almost God like status of officers was indeed a worry coupled with the very low living standards (and dare I say, low educational level of the average soldier). It’s how you define “mental processing” that makes the difference imo. For what purpose? Soldiering requires discipline, it has too.
Any organization is occasionally vulnerable to one individual coming along and stealing the whole show and the game takes on a new flavor. That’s what often makes an assassin’s bullet, blade and or legal/financial/betrayal ambush such important part of history.
Then there’s the tool of religion…