It is with a very heavy heart that I report the passing of our dear friend Kirk Radandt yesterday afternoon.
To say this was untimely, unexpected and horribly premature would be to understate the sadness of it by a country mile.
I have met few people on this earth who were as happy, friendly and just fun to spend time with as Kirk. His sense of humor was sharp and displayed itself often. His love of children made him a favorite of our sons and the 3 adorable daughters of his beloved Gayle’s son Aaron (Tony Ortega covered Gayle and Aaron’s story on his blog). I have long held a measuring stick against a man to gauge his attitude towards children and theirs towards him. To me it has proven a reliable indicator of their goodness. And by that measure (and any other for that matter) Kirk was off the top of the charts. A caring friend who was never too busy to help out, Kirk was that guy you have over for dinner that does the dishes and fixes the clogged drain and waters the plants to boot. When I said I had a very heavy heart, I really mean to say I have a large hole in my heart, a vacant space where our friend Kirk resided.
Kirk and Gayle have been like family to us since the day we first met them. We shared common experiences in the church in the past, but also shared the bond that is forged in the pain of disconnection in the present. Kirk’s son Zach is a staff member at the Tampa Idle Org, and he has refused to communicate with Kirk for two years now. It was something Kirk talked about often, how some day he would reunite with his only son who lives just a few miles away and is now married to a daughter-in-law Kirk doesn’t know. And now that is never going to happen.
It is the finality of death that is so hard to accept. The opportunities that will never present themselves again to tell someone how much you love them. To share your joys and sorrows, victories and accomplishments. And it is the tragedy of disconnection that this tearing apart of relationships, almost universally without the consent of one half of the family, in the end becomes final and unrepairable.
Go in peace Kirk. And rest assured your many friends and your loving family will always remember you, and will take care of your Gayle, and will ultimately bring an end to the savagery of enforced disconnection.
There are people in this world who have met no strangers. Because everyone they do meet, they are fast friends in minutes. It sounds like Kirk was one of those kind of people. My sister was one too, I always said she could walk up to a tree and be fast friends forever with it. She was a light and attracted so many to her and our family home was never without a bunch of her friends around. She left this earth way too early and she is dearly missed. My sincere condolences to all who knew Kirk, his light will shine on in all of the people he touched.
Ran CC with Kirk in high school was great guy will be missed! Mag
A being that recognizes truth and holds tight is one to follow. That was he. Such an inspiration of love for friends, family and life. So glad to have known and hung out with him.God Speed Kirk!
My sympathies to all affected by Kirk’s passing.
Yes, when you have a comm line like this, a person who is simply irreplacable to you, it is the finality of death which is so hard to come to grips with that one must live with, deal with daily, hourly, and minute by minute. From experience I know there is little you can say to someone who is experiencing the emptiness and aching sadness of a tremendous loss like this. Confronting it is an ongoing process which takes as long as it takes and which can, months or even years later, rear up suddenly, and there you are, once more, confronting that awful finality. Sometimes it can be comforting to get lots of pictures of the loved one and blow them up, very big, and place them all around you in your house, all over the place Sounds silly, but I did it once, and it helped, gave some comfort.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-PNun-Pfb4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eh44QPT1mPE
MikeyWr – Here’s a little Neil for both Kirk and Gayle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAdtUDaBfRA
We will play some Neil Young for you, Kirk.
So sad to learn of Kirk’s passing. I had the pleasure of being one of his fellow staff members in Columbus in the early 90s. Heartfelt condolences to my friend Gayle & her boys. Very sad.
Gayle, I’m very sorry to hear this sad news and so very sorry for your loss.
Mike, that was a beautiful memorial to Kirk.
For someone I was just getting to know, Kirk was one of those special people who always seemed to be smiling. I saw him as a warm and devoted love to Gayle and a warm friend to everyone he met. I was just emailing my friend Mary about going to Kirk and Gayle’s New Years Eve party when I got the news of his passing. After my extreme shock of a wonderful man who was gone way too soon I cried for all his family and friends. Kirk you will be dearly missed. Gayle, Christie and Mike and all of Kirk’s family, I am so sorry for your loss.
Very very sorry for the loss of your friend, Mike. I know from experience how hard it is to have this sort of thing happen. He sounds like the kind of being who would not want you to have a hole in your heart under any circumstances…..
Enforced disconnection is truly an evil and cowardly way for a person to avoid handling thier own inability to confront and communicate with other people and to seek to manipulate others. My heart goes out also to Kirk’s family.
I am so sorry to hear of your friend’s death. He must have been a wonderful man, he left such a loving legacy. His son may have acted cruelly by disconnecting as ordered by the church, but I can’t help but think he must be hurting very badly now, and he has no one in that miserable church who will help him. My deepest condolences to you and all of Kirk Radandt’s family and friends.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Mike
I do not know you (and if we did meet, I apologize for not remembering); I want to thank you for your kind words about my brother. Reading your remembrance and the loving words of those who comment confirm what I had suspected–Kirk had a great circle of people around him in Florida. He had a rich full life. Sadly, I have not met many of you, but as his brother, I am heartened to know he was so well loved.
Thank you all for knowing him, appreciating him. I, too, wish there was more of him to share.
Doug
Doug — thank you so much for coming here and commenting. It means a lot to me. No, we have never met, so nothing to apologize for. But in some measure I feel I know you through Kirk as his love of his 3 brothers was the topic of many discussions and his recent trip with you all was a highlight that couldn’t stop talking about before he went and then when he got home. I have had the great pleasure of meeting and spending time with your mother and with Ross and Dawn and if you are anything like them and Kirk, you are good people. Gotta tell you too, I love Colorado as anyone who knows me knows. When I found out where you lived it told me that when we do meet, we will be kindred spirits. I have very fond memories of the time I have spent in Ned and always got a kick out reference to the flatlanders.
This sad death brings me back in the dark circle of my life.
I joined the Sea Org at age 14, and lasted pretty much 25 years of my life. Every month or so I ask myself if I wasted my prime years of my life and I know Mike Rinder you do as well.
I blew or departed in 1998, got to see my mother Claire Reppen die in 2001 while I was barely able to stay in good standing. Times were looser then. I am sorry Gayle that this has turned out to be.
Dear Mike, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your good friend. His legacy of love and joy, laughter and caring is always yours to feel and recall whenever you wish him near. He is as close to you as your next breath., or the next beat of your heart.. Which of course doesn’t make the tangible loss any easier to ber.. at the moment. My condolences and love to you all. JL
Heart felt condolences Mike and your kind words of love and admiration for someone; though a friend; was like a brother to you it seems.
Mike, I’m very sorry for your families loss of a such good friend. My heart goes out to his family and to all who knew him. His light shines.
I’m so sorry for your loss Mike. My deepest condolences to you and your family, and to Kirk’s family and friends. He sounds like a wonderful being, may he find peace.
I’m truly sorry for your loss Mike.
Though I’d never met Kirk. He seemed like a nice guy.
So sorry for your loss.
Awwwww…..thank you Mike for such a compassionate, kind and loving tribute to Kirk and his family. Disconnection is THE worst thing $CIENTOLOGY does—-and for me, “This is WHY”. (I speak out…I continue to try to help families, educate people to NOT join, etc). I did not know Kirk, but I know **way** to many “Scientologists” who have died way too young, OR have taken their own lives.
You mentioned not getting to tell people you love them. I learned this when my Dad died when I was 22. I had just written him an entire letter pouring out my heart to him, telling him how sorry I was for my many mistakes and how much I loved him. For my entire life I’ve met people who have told me: “I just wish I could have told your Dad______” (Thank you, how much they loved him, etc). So with that, and this, I always try to remind people: Tell people how you *really* feel, NOW. You never know when this will be your last chance.
Fly high, Kirk, and may your family and friends celebrate the fact that they did get to know you.
Peace and love,
Tory/Magoo
A beautiful tribute. My condolences to Gayle, family and friends.
What a beautiful eulogy. I never met Kirk but almost feel I *know him* from this write up. Fly high with the angels Kirk. ♥☆¨*:•.
Very sorry Gayle, Mike and Christie for your great loss. Kirk sounds like the type of guy it would have been an honor to know.
Thank you Mike for your wonderfully appreciate words.
I am still sort of speechless. My encounter with Kirk was very good though brief -the last Indie meeting- but I really got from Gayle that he was a great guy to be with and worth keeping.
Often bad things seem to happen around X-mas, I almost hold my breath, it seemed we were over the hump and then I got the news.
I can’t hold back my tears….Gayle, I am holding you in a big hug!
Greta
Well said Mike. Kirk looked like a great guy.
Gayle, Tami and I are saddened by your shocking loss. We have all lost a dear friend.
“A heart ❤ is not judged by how much you love ❤, but by how much you are loved by others. ” The Wizard of Oz. – L. Frank Baum.
Mike, and everyone that cared for this good hearted man I am so sorry for your loss and I hope you will seek comfort in fellowship with each other to continue this fight until everyone in now will be an ex- member of this hateful cult. Thank you all for all you do to show that there is life after Scamatology.
All of my family, when body death comes, are cremated. Planting bodies in the ground never appealed to us. However, there was one grave marker at a traditional burial plot that read, “I’m Just In The Other Room.” Greatest message I’ve ever seem on a grave stone. And one that resonates with me.
Kirk…you’re just in the other room..
Thanks, Mike – that was a beautiful eulogy. Kirk was such a wondeful guy. I had the great pleasure to stay with Gayle and Kirk for 10 days last Spring. He was a fun guy to joke around with and was very caring. He even taught me how to cook a steak in his inimitable style. What Jewish guy knows how to cook?
I will sadly miss him. So long ….
Thomas Paine was a philosopher and political activist credited for inspiring the rebels in 1776 to declare independence from Britain, thus launching the American experiment. His sights were global, his audience humankind. He became notorious upon publishing ‘The Age of Reason’, in which he argued against institutionalized religion in general and Christian doctrine in particular.
In 1793, he was imprisoned for publishing, in Paris. Ostracized for ridicule of the church, only six people attended his funeral in 1809.
The name of Kirk was unknown to me until his passing.
Of his love there is no doubt.
Energy can neither be created not destroyed, it only changes forms.
You can see in the golden glow of sunset the suffering that once resided in the heart of Kirk,
suffering brought by the cold policy of disconnection.
It makes a golden glow, a silver lining drawn above the black clouds resting on the horizon of the Pacific reaches all the way over the ground upon which you stand. Some days, it will be harder to see. But, it is Kirk, the beauty of it driven by his once-suffering heart. Listen. Close your eyes, You may hear the heartbeat, rising up from the middle of Earth.
Tune your ear, and the voice of each of us becomes the voice that is his.
We are spirit. We are immortal. Look again, over the sea, and Kirk is remembered, yet not alone.
Sad News. God speed Kirk.
Your light has dimmed
but it has not gone
in those that knew and loved you
a little flame of light lives on
and when we are together
we will bring those little lights
and they will shine
your light will burn brightly
we will talk and laugh and cry
and you will be among us
lighting up our lives again
I didn’t know Kirk but its very sad to hear of the loss of a dear one. May all his family and friends consider mostly of the good times together and celebrate his life, he’ll take comfort in that.
I am sorry for your loss, and my heart goes out to Gayle and Kirk’s son. It is events like this that show us just how much each one of us matters.
We each are a light in someone else’s life. Let’s keep on shining. Maybe Kirk is up among the stars, shining back.
Big hug to all of you grieving the loss of your good friend. I did not know him well but had heard from other friends how wonderful he was – everything you described Mike.
I am so sorry for your loss.
I hope one day his son wakes up and gets out.
Mike, I am sorry for the loss of your friend.
My condolences to you, his family, and friends.
My heartfelt condolences go out to all of you who knew and loved Kirk. May he Rest in Peace.
Very, very sad to hear this Mike. My sincere condolences Gayle. I am in shock and speechless.
A beautiful dedication for a beautiful being. Thank you Mike for your tribute!
I never knew Kirk, but from what I’ve seen he is and has been well loved by those who did know him. Thank you for the wonderful words of appreciation, Mike, for this good man taken from us too soon. Rest in Peace, Kirk.
This is so beautifully written Mike and so fitting. His father was one my favorite people from my former org in Chicago — such a warm and irresistibly lovable man. I was sad when he died and when I met Kirk, it was like seeing my friend all over again because there was instant warmth, love and kindness. He also shared this great love of his dad and it was so nice to feel that bond. I never got to know Kirk after that but it was blatantly obvious, from one meeting, what an amazing man he was — no doubt.
Gayle and family, I am sorry for your loss. There are no words.
I didn’t know Kirk but your words shared all that he was with us. Thank you.
What a beautiful but sad story! My thoughts are with all of you.
My condolences to Gayle and All of Kirk’s family members and friends. My thoughts go out to his son Zach, and all for people who are affected by the evil practice of Disconnection, which is a form of a living death. Something the Church of Scientology is well practiced at.
Perfect tribute to a wonderful friend! He always had an ear to ear grin on his face and would light up any room. He was a big kid at heart. He and Gayle had a beautiful relationship that was just plain fun and loving every single time we all spent time together. Kirk has left a huge hole in my heart as well, I will miss my very kind, fun and happy friend too!
I am so sorry for your sudden and unexpected loss. Your tribute is a beautiful reflection of your love for him and of his for you.
the Church of Scientology will feel no shame over their shameful act of forcing this mans only son to disconnect from him. His son will not even be allowed to attend his funeral to say his last good bye, this is how truly heartless this organization has become under the leadership of David Miscavige.
…..Not only not allowed to attend the funeral but the sin will likely be compounded by someone at some point suggesting to his son that his father had fallen into some kind of spiritual abyss because he turned his back on David Miscavige’s church.
I am sorry for the loss of your friend Mike and particularly at this time of year.
So accurate KFrancis. I hope Kirks son does attend the service …………. for his sake. If not, the spiritual abyss for the cult will grow much much wider on that day.
Yo Dave,
If you have one braincell left, you would use it to be sure Zach has time off to attend his Dads service. We will be watching.
Yes. There’s no humanity in the true believers. They will say he pulled it in by committing suppresive acts. There’s blame for everything inside the cherch. Somehow believing he pulled it in will make sense to them.
Mike, I’m so sorry for your loss.
Too Dangerous, you’re talking my language. True Believers, no matter what religion, sect, cult, or organization, have their minds made up and no amount of evidence can change that. And, of course, scientology is a leader in getting people NOT to think for themselves. I’m glad you brought it up. Nice post!
Damn, I am sorry I never knew Kirk. What a shame for his family and many friends. That is the biggest thing that sucks about death: you lose the comm line. If you could still talk to your friends nobody would give a damn about it. Beautiful eulogy, Mike. Unlike anything I ever read in the church.
So true Dan, it is loosing the comm line thats so hard about death. One thing I have found helpful in the past, from LRH, is to establish where the being is and put a comm line in. Who knows, maybe it is imaginary, but somehow it works. They have started another game!
yes, I have also found that it somehow works 🙂
It gives that chance of conveying what one didn’t have a chance to say when the being was still in or around the body.
Greta
My deep condolences to you, his family, and friends.
Kirk, I knew you for only a short while but it was impossible not to like you. We will continue to be there offering friendship and help to others just as you and Gayle were there for us.
You are loved and missed.
Mike, I’m so very sorry for your loss. Kirk sounds like he’d be everyone’s best friend. A man so full of love, he can’t contain it. A bright shining light in this universe.
Kirk, although I never knew you, I wish you well on your continuing journey to the next level of life. Like the call to arms when in Texas the Alamo was overrun by Santa Ana’s troops, our call to arm with you is to wrap you up in our unconditional love for you and your family. The only constant in life is change. I sometimes have trouble with that, but, there’s no getting around it. Kirk, I look forward to meeting you on the other side.
When we have friends and family leave us for the great beyond, we always send them off with a round of applause for a life well lived. Well Kirk, I hope I can’t speak for all the posters, Mike and his family, that we are all standing and giving you a tremendous round of applause for your life so well lived. Go in peace, my friend.
+1
+1
Beautiful OSD.. You spoke words that I could NOT.. so eloquently and from the heart..Thank you..
+1
Sorry to hear about this loss. Our condolences Gayle and family
My thoughts and prayers go out to Gayle and her family to help them through this difficult time. They are very lucky to have friends like you and Christie and your family.
Your efforts to peel back the dark forces of disconnection and reunite families and friends does not go unnoticed Mike. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for being such a good friend to Kirk and his family. My best wishes are yours.
Coop
+100 Again…
I am very sorry for your loss, Mike. Kirk sounds like the kind of friend and person we all think about finding and keeping. Why anyone would knowingly agree to not share in the joy this man could bring – defies all logic and all sense of compassion. I hope his passing has some profound effect on those who shunned him and bring up their awareness of what they just truly lost. Perhaps then they’ll see the unnecessary hurt their actions and agreements perpetuate.
Odd
Watching the friendship, joy and love shared by you and Christie, Paul and Jacki, and Gayle and Kirk has been one of the great pleasures in my life. Kirk’s passing leaves a big hole, but I am confident the bond is not broken.
Gayle and Mike and all who knew him, my sincere condolences. He looks so young, so that makes the loss even harder to take. You have friends in all of us at the Rinder site. I send you my love.
Beautiful eulogy, Mike.
Kirk was a new friend who I was looking forward to getting to know better. I had the pleasure of spending a little time with and another pleasure of meeting and having a memorable talk with his mother the night before his untimely death. In that way I am blessed.
Thank you for sharing your memories and love of Kirk. I know him better now.
My heartfelt condolences to you, Christie and your sons.
My heartfelt condolences to Gayle, Jackie and the rest of Kirk’s family and friends.
+100
Dear Mike – I didn’t know your beautiful friend, Kirk, but I wish I had. One can never know enough golden gems like him.
And, I know what you mean about a hole in your heart. My best friend in the world passed away abruptly a few years ago. Way way too soon and way too abrupt. The hole will heal in time but, just like pleasure moments, the love will never fade away. He was lucky to have you as a friend.
A beautiful tribute to a beautiful and loving person, Kirk Radandt, Mike. I cried as I read this and I’m still crying. He was everything you say here. He meant so much to all of us. I can’t believe he is gone so soon. Just two weeks ago at your party, he came up to me with this ear-to-ear grin, threw his arms around me, gave me a huge hug, a kiss on the cheek and said “Hi Sara, Merry Christmas.” When I would visit Clearwater I would often stay with Kirk and Gayle and he always treated me like I was family. I will miss him so much. It is heart-breaking that he never got to see his son again because of the evil practice of enforced disconnection with the church. I was thinking of him yesterday and I had this little thought, He said “I’m OK. It’s all going to be OK.” And, I felt his big smile and love and a sense of peace. He left us with lots of good memories of fun times and sharing the love. Love you Kirk. RIP