They keep hyping the vital necessity of Orlando “ideal” org because there are so many tourists.
They’ve apparently got no better reason to try and persuade people this is important.
Of course, they don’t mention that more people visit Los Angeles and New York each year, and they’ve had ideal orgs for decades. The result? Zip, nada and nothing.
And even more on point, Las Vegas has almost as many vacationers, and arguably ones more susceptible to the scientology pitch than families on the way to Disney World (kids account for a good portion of that 68 million number — there are probably more adult visitors to Vegas). Las Vegas has had an ideal org for about a decade. Nobody even knows it’s there. Just like Orlando, it’s out in the boonies. It has a perpetually empty parking lot, few public, less staff and difficulty paying their utilities bills. That’s quite a model to strive for. All those tourists in Vegas are absolutely meaningless. The Vegas ideal org sees none of them,
And now they are doubling down on their insanity. More “reasons” this ideal org is SO important (remember Silicon Valley that is going to take over the tech industry because they have a parking lot that borders a parking lot that Google people park in?) and they are even wackier than the tourist stats:
2nd best place for job seekers… and that is important because people without jobs are good candidates for scientology?
It has a nickname? And it’s pretty lame. NY and Chicago have better nicknames. So what?
Largest University? I guess that means Boston is not such a big deal? Orlando has one university, Boston has dozens. So does NY, and LA. Chicago’s got a lot too…
Clearly, they have NOTHING related to scientology to talk about so they are trying to sell the idea of “Orlando” as a nice place. Weird.
This really encapsulates the scientology mindset. They are like a guy sitting on a pier with a fishing pole, a pin and a worm. He announces to everyone who will listen that he is “tapping into the largest food supply on earth — billions of billions of fish right there in the ocean.” He then starts asking for donations to get a better looking fishing pole (leaving the bent pin and the worm) proclaiming “I will be overwhelmed with more fish than I can eat and I will share it around with all of you and everyone will have fish. Jesus only fed 5,000, I am making planetary hunger a thing of the past.”
And that would only be a good analogy if you added one final thing. All the fish had internet with pictures of worms on pins and big letters underneath “stay away, it’s a trap and they will eat you if you get caught.”
Brilliant post and analogy Mike!
Coming back today to re-read this. Co$ loves the ignorant. Co$ loves uneducated, unemployable people. Accordingly, all Scientology Still Ins in good standing dutifully raise their children to be exactly this. Thank God this cult is tiny, because this cult mindset about education is catching on. Its troubling that our current President appears greatly enamored with this particular demographic.
I recently visited Orlando. Terrible traffic & freeways under construction, too spread out, Universal Studios took way too much time to explore. There is no way vacationers will waste precious time at a controversial religions building. I would rather go see the beach in Daytona or nightlife in Downtown Orlando.
They would literally need to buy a resort and give people free night stays in order for anyone to do a Scn tour. That’s their competition in Orlando. It reminds me of doing a timeshare demo with a really ugly arm twisting at the end.
I’ve been to Orlando a few times. A pit with horrible half built TOLL freeways and no reason to exist except for Disney World.
🙂
Orlando: Fasting expanding city in Florida
Scientology: Fasting shrinking religion in the guLAXy
Fasting? People in Florida fast? Well…good for them! That’s a healthy thing to do.
Oy, what’s the point of the 5 minute edit window if I don’t proof my posts even once?!?
I’m guessing that out of that 68 million $camology might get, if they’re lucky, 90,000th of 1%.
68,000,000 visitors comes to 186,301 people per day, 365 days per year. I don’t think so.
I would bet that NOT ONE person going to Orlando on a vacation would ever set foot in a scientology building. I can’t imagine anything more dreary than scientology while visiting Orlando.
Let’s see kids, Disneyworld or scientology automated kiosks in a bleak sterile echo chamber? Where do you want to go today, children?
Scientologists have crossed over from fantasyland to complete insanity, the very thing they keep lying to themselves that they are eradicating.
Lunacy!
What if the kids answer that they want to go to Fantasyland?
I think you mean Cenobiteland where they have such sights to show you…
I agree. It is the insanity. How sad for the people still in giving their life and their money to let DM live a life of privilege. When will they wake up to the abuse that is Scientology.
Those Calciolis sure do get around…
Why would a member of CMO UK be recruiting for a US org?
Nobody else capable enough from Flag (if Wick Allcock qualifies as capable) so they import someone from the UK (not sure why she isn’t doing something about the dismal state of the London ideal morgue…)
Mike, have a heart. The woman needs a change of scene. Spending too much time in a foggy M’orgue can make a person down tone.
LA was mentioned as one of the most visited US cities..Anaheim is close..
I googled Disneyland. In 2015 they had 18+ million visitors
If u count. 3 million that attend Angels games..it adds up
Seems like big opportunity to hand out Way to Happiness books
The dramatic language that Scientology uses in their PR campaigns is amusing. Much like the car/truck commercials on t.v. they love to use over top analogies and ridiculous statistics. Mike’s comments on Orlando’s visitor numbers got me thinking. Just for kicks I googled the most ‘popular’ places to live in the US in the years 2017-2018. Business Insider listed 50 cities but not Orlando. Money Mag. decided St Augustine was the best place in Fl. The lists go on but I could not verify via a Google search Scientology’s claim. From whence do they cultivate their facts ? Lack of source references indicates slip shod work but we all know that story. At the end of this ‘commercial’ it says, ‘source article L.R. Hubbard.’ Wow the guy who attempted to bluff the world into believing his word was true, authentic and the ultimate in Savior Power. Attempted as in ….it is over so turn in your hero cape. Oh man, picture Hubbard atop a tall building in a red, skin tight, Super Hero suit with an S on the belt, hair blowing in the stiff breeze, lumps and bumps undulating under the suit. Next to him is McSavage in a miniature red suit, DM on the belt, hair not moving an inch in the stiff breeze.
At this point, a better tactic is for staff to dress in orange robes, shave their heads, and pretend they are Krishnas. What harm can another bait-and-switch do?
Scientology cannot stop stuffing both feet into mouth. I beg to differ with the most Ethical Beings that ever arrived on this Prison Planet, but I have been to Orlando, the airport was insane with crowds going to The Mouse House, which is the name of Disney World in Northwest FL. And Winter Park where I was had a Huge sinkhole and those two points did not endear me to the area. The Ideal Org IAS Scam looks all white and sugary shine, but open the doors to go inside & all that fake bridge, melts into a rancid puddle of Lies.
Thank you Mike. Love your pieces, very powerful & True.????
So will Sea Org members be dressed up as LRH, his numerous wives, disowned family members, and David Miscavage? I mean it is Orlando and they are competing with Disney, Harry Potter, etc. And, do they have a rides? Maybe miniature race cars where ministure atomic bombs are thrown at the racers. Talk about back to the future.
I envision a poor man version of Lincoln in Disney’s Hall of Presidents…
A pathetic automatron of LRH droning on about his bullshit musings he pulled out of his ass, with all the “you see”s and “so forths”.
It could double as a sleep disorder clinic.
LOL, A J!
Will this automatron refer to ‘difrenchiating'(differentiating)?
Say what you will about LRH but I get a chuckle out of that Montana accent he used to speak with!
It’s particularly ironic that the PR campaign around this org focuses on all the traffic and activity in Orlando and the supposed opportunity that implies (or imagines), because it’s pretty clear that for about the last decade, the “ideal” org campaign has effectively given up on “body routing” public outreach, and abandoned trying to have orgs in prominent, central locations. Instead this new org location, like the others of its ilk, is in out-of-the-way cheap commercial office park property, intended to be convenient enough for daily commuters but not really convenient to the general public. I suspect that, in part, they’ve retreated from public spaces because they don’t want their staff (and members) to have to face increasing rejection by the public, and so prefer to remove themselves to isolated locations that are also less attractive targets for pickets and “raids.”
These rather remotely located orgs aren’t actually doing anything significant or effective to reach out to the public and take advantage of any possible opportunities – and certainly Orlando hasn’t up until now, struggling along as one of the smallest and weakest of orgs. They just seem to keep imagining that somehow people are magically going to start making the effort to come to them. Possibly worse yet, this new org building is on the opposite side of town from their previous locations and away from where people generally live, which will probably make it harder for them to get even their existing members to come in.
Excellent observation. I think you”re right on the money.
How much money are we talking about, Chris?
Ha ha! How much have you got? Inquiring IAS registrars want t know.
Me? I’m jess po’ white trailer trash wit page numbers on my toilet paper.
“They just seem to keep imagining that people are somehow magically going to start making the effort to come to them.”
Yes! This! Buy a beautiful building, furnish it as an “Ideal Org”, and people will then flood in for Scientology services! Its magic!
Its insane.
But ‘ll tell’ya, how Miscavige was able to sell them THIS snake oil of a stable datum is no small feat.
How he persuaded them to believe this, to OPERATE on this – this RIDICULOUSNESS! I don’t get it!
I have to hand it to the Dwarf, though. What a con! PT Barnum, move over, you know? An amazing con.
Many people didn’t buy the Ideal Org Strategy, yet many others did, and still do!
Some of the people who bought it are NOT dummies at all in other ways. Highly trained people, in Scientology for decades…how is it POSSIBLE that they FELL for this, and are STILL falling for it?
Did I mention that I don’t get it?
End of the rant this turned out to be.
The Ideal Org project is a total and utter scam.
The new Ideal Org in our City, that we just had to have now, now, now – way back in 2007 or 2008 – is getting sold and we are staying the building we are currently in. What a scam.
It has been 10 years plus of bankrupting the staff and public only to make a full circle.
Many members filed bankruptcy and lost homes to foreclosure to “make it go right”.
There is so much financial ruin for the members – you think now they would wake up and come out of the fog of lies.
Scientology delivers nothing but broken promises and lies.
That’s really sad. I’m curious to know where that is, that they’ve finally given up, and are just staying in their current building. San Diego already went through that “cycle,” but I can’t think of another org currently in such a position, though it’s not not surprising that some of the many that bought buildings that have become a liability as they sit and decay, are are getting to that point. It’s awful that members essentially gave up their own homes, so that the org could have a 40,000 square foot building to serve a membership that typically consists of only about 4 to 5 dozen really active people.
Boston has given up on the historic property that they bought around the same time, but they have since purchased one of these more modern but still aging (built c. 1980s) commercial office properties, apparently waiting for the sale of the first property to provide funds to renovate the second, though I suspect they are going to take a big loss and still come up short. In the meantime, they continue to work out of what was supposed to be temporary space, having sold their centrally located long-term home. They’re now in what looks to me like an inconvenient location that may even be hurting them – I’ve thought of checking it out when I occasionally go through Boston, but the org is now so out of the way that I’ve never made it.
I’d really like to see the story told, of the lies and loss of one of these “ideal” org campaigns, because it’s got to be sort of slow-motion tragedy taking place in many cities – Mike, how about that for an Aftermath content idea?
I assume now that it must be the St. Louis “ideal” org campaign and building that have been abandoned, since as I noted in a post on this week’s Funnies, it’s conspicuously missing from a collage of all the campaigns and projects currently claimed to be in progress. Or is there another one that has been “disposed of quietly and without sorrow”? (to quote LRH)
Ah… fishing analogies. Just my cup of tea.
Fish are not stupid, Scientologists are!
Are Scientologists Stupid?
PC: Yes.
Course sup: That is the correct answer.
There has been an org in Orlando for decades. It has always been a tiny, struggling, nothing of an org despite all the great things about Orlando. No renovations is going to change that.
It’s a better looking fishing pole Mat… Bound to catch more fish. Enough fish to feed the world.
What was that about “Having to have before you can do…” ? That used to be pounded into us … but of course it doesn’t apply to DM.
I love your analogy! It is a perfect comparison to those Orlando ads.
There has been an org in Orlando for decades. It has always been a tiny, struggling, nothing of an org despite all the great things about Orlando. No renovations is going to change that.
When a whorehouse does not work well you are not changing wallpaper and furniture.
That’s right! When you change the wallpaper & furniture, you’re going to get thousands of people to come into your org. I guarantee it!
The toxic rep of Scientology puts every marketing program they attempt from Ideal Orgs to SciTV firmly in the “polishing a turd” category. Maybe LRH is doing better at Target 2?
Their reputation is just a shade above Jonestown…and falling quickly.
Nevertheless, Dude, many have died, too.
True that…
All the listed “reasons” are WHY Orlando will alway fail; No visitors there for Disney will go near the Idle Morg and long-distance body-routing isn’t likely, even if Disney allows SCN to flog their wares(unlikely), people with jobs and good job prospects won’t be susceptible, those students stay on campus, enjoying their parties. Nothing gonna happen that gets bodies in. AND if the bodies came in, there’s no training or auditing going on(except down at Flag), so no cashflow from that expen$ive boondoggle/white elephant, and its location is so bad, Dwarfenführer might not be able to sell it off to cut his losses and run.
I think you’re exactly right regarding Orlando org’s poor prospects, as I noted in detail in another comment.
That last point is a good rebuttal to people who think that the ideal orgs are just a real estate strategy by Miscavige, intended to be unloaded if he wants to raise cash.
This building sat on the market for years, and finally went to sale at auction, indicating that it’s not very desirable or easy to turn over. Scientology may upgrade and renovate it, but they will probably remodel and reconfigure it in specialized ways that wouldn’t be attractive, or have value, to a prospective commercial owner, who might well want to gut it and return it to a more normal office building configuration. These properties would probably be hard to sell, and then only at a significant loss.
This is similar to what is encountered in residential real estate, where custom features in a house, such as taking up the back yard with a pool or pond in an area where those aren’t the norm, or having an upstairs with lots of tiny bedrooms for a large family, actually reduce the sale value of the property because most prospective buyers will have to go to the trouble and expense of re-configuring the property for more typical use. Sellers may hope that a buyer will come along who actually values specialized features, but that rarely pans out, and typically such properties go for a big discount after having sat on the market for a long time.
Yes, Orlando might be a great place to live, but staff won’t get to enjoy it much And when you’re working SO hours, you can’t do it. After 5 years in Clearwater, I got to enjoy the beach just a few blocks away a grand total of 3 times, two of them about midnight; after my sweetie and I got off of work and we felt like a night-time stroll. Another time, another sweetie and I ditched CSP to walk around Honeymoon Island for an hour. And that was in the glory days when Flag was THE ideal org, recently spruced up, fully staffed, and stats regularly BEST EVER. Other than for 2D infractions, “Ethics” was pretty light.(Oh, I forgot: That was also when Sraff were being RPFed for an isolated rock slam, not even L1 R/S, and Tubby’s auditor was thrown under a bus for suggesting that Tubby’s HUNDREDs of R/Ses be properly handled. Life in SCN has always been easier when you were away from the limelight. Worst thing you can be is a “shining example”, as the next thing you know, you’ll be squashed like a bug, subjected to TPTB’s “Simon Bolivar” condition application.
Totally hear you Jere Lull… the insanities never end with this group.
Yep! They just get crazier.
Great analogy.
I took a deeper look at the economics of the Orlando Ideal Org a couple weeks ago on my blog, including some details on the purchase price. The link: http://johnpcapitalist.com/2018/02/ideal-org-orlando/
It’s as bad as you say — the fact that Scientology has a skeleton presence in the 4 cities with the biggest tourist influx in the US (LA, Orlando, NYC, Las Vegas) sure shows that they don’t want people to find out about Scientology. And the fact that they bought the Orlando building on the cheap at auction suggests that even the long-time true believers are not buying the Ideal Org program any longer.
The fishing analogy is excellent. Have to remember that one, it really cracked me up!
LOVE your analogies! True and funny as hell Mike.
Ya know, in the sun belt they could have at LEAST put solar panels on the roofs of the ideal morgues so as to defray the electricity costs. Hell, with almost no one inside it would probably provide cash from the power companies on a monthly basis.
“And that would only be a good analogy if you added one final thing. All the fish had internet with pictures of worms on pins and big letters underneath “stay away, it’s a trap and they will eat you if you get caught.”
ROFL
In 1988 I met Davey face to face on the Freewinds. He had a simple mind at the time dominated by a few taped lectures from Hubbard. He was in the process of trashing OT VIII because he could not understand Hubbard’s rantings about politicians,anti-Christ, Buddha, and space aliens. Now almost thirty years later, Davey enters the major trap of his life. Here is Davey selling a watered down version of Scientology which no one wants. Just imagine the possibilities he missed. Orlando with a Xenu statue. Now that would be exciting. How about a ride in a DC-8 with Hubbard instead of John Travolta as the pilot? This is almost tragic. Who needs an Ideal Org which is based on false assumptions? As a mater of fact, I need to change my Museum of Religious Freedom from Clearwater to Orlando. My picture of Blavatsky throwing butter at Hubbard at the dinner table would be a hit. Seriously, this Scientology needs to stop. It is basically false advertising with Davey and I don’t see why we cannot lift the statute of limitations. I had no idea what Hubbard was into forty-five years ago and he wasted my time.
He wasted my time too George. LRH looked into the spirit world and reported his findings filtered through his imaginative and disturbed mind. (As many that preceded him) He also discovered he could use his viewpoint and his story telling talent to make money and gain power/control over people. And THIS is where he really excelled: he didn’t invent/discover spirits, Body Thetans and other non-MEST viewpoints, but he sure as hell discovered how to monetize them!! Hahaha…. all the way to bank…
Was Davey the worst or the best person to follow LRH? It depends on your viewpoint. But whatever your viewpoint, Davey sure turned the word Scientology into a 4 letter curse word faster than anyone I can imagine. For instance, what if Diana Hubbard had taken over in 1983? We might have have had a kinder, gentler world of Scientology. Maybe a longer life? I don’t know.
There was a giant elephant in the room when LRH was alive: people in a hypnotized state were willing to pay all their $ with nothing in return. This was seldom exploited by LRH because he knew that eventually running a straight con with nothing in exchange (like auditing or training) would eventually put him in jail. Davey did not get that message. Either because he was too young or too evil or too dim, but I believe this out-exchange was how Davey got the Scientology movement so quickly into the toilet of history. With Davey, it’s all about getting money from LRH’s hypnotized public and giving nothing back.
I did briefly meet Diana Hubbard in 1983. I think she would have been a better choice.
Good Lord, a beachball with arms would have been a better choice than Miscavige!
Hubbard flying a DC-8! Now, THAT would be a neat trick, since he’s been dead for decades and all. Not that I would have sat in any airframe he piloted UNLESS I could wrest the controls away from him when he gave “The Empress” a go at controlling things (I did earn a pilot’s license, unlike Tubby. He never did have the wherewithal to finish complex tasks, I’ve observed.)
But George!
Hubbard led you to Crowley, which led to Blavatsky, and back to Hermes Trismegistus. It has been one hell of a trip IMO.
You are correct on that, Jim. As an Egyptian Priest, Hermes Trismegistus would have bathed three times a day. He would have shaved off every hair on his body in order to remain pure while he was accepting money donations from the fooled public. This is according to Blavatsky, of course. HT probably invented the original ARC triangle which he defined as Alchemy, Astronomy and Theurgy. At the end I had to act all of this out in order to banish Hubbard from my mind but it was worth it.. I found out that Alchemy was in the end all about body thetans. Astronomy was all about the Marcabs. Theurgy was all about exteriorization which any good Neo-Platonist could do in his sleep or while awake.
A home run.
🙂 Good analogy 🙂
When I was “in”, from 1970 to 2005, there was always a disconnection from reality by staff and public. But today as staff and public sit in empty Orgs and talk about saving the planet, it reminds me of those Japanese soldiers left on isolated and uninhabited Pacific islands who continued the war for years past V-J day.
There always will be that disconnect from reality for those in the bubble. It’s required to accept anything Tubby said/wrote.
Japs on an Island . Perfect analogy of Scientologist ,staff and public. Very funny.
The term ‘Japs’ is an insult. I should know as I’m married to one. Just so you know what I’m talking about…
No worries. I just got a little wound up when I read, Japs on an Island. But, really it’s kind of funny when you think about it. It’s like one of those reality shows! And now it’s time to play, ‘Japs On An Island!’ Who will be the first voted off the Island!
Hey, we all have to find something to laugh about everyday!
OSD, I get where you’re coming from. I’m half Italian but I don’t look it at all. All my life people have been telling me their Italian jokes with “ethnic slurs” like “greaseball”, “wop”, etc ..you get the idea. Similar jokes exist for Polish people, and then there are Jewish jokes about being cheap, Irish jokes about being stupid and stubborn, etc. Anyway when I hear these Italian jokes, it they’re funny, I laugh! No big deal. Some of them are very funny. Now, it has occurred that afterward, the tellers of the jokes found out that I am Italian, on my mother’s side, although no one ever knows from looking at me…anyway OMG did they get mortified and embarrassed and apologetic, etc! So I had to calm THEM down. I wasn’t insulted. Funny is funny. And its true, you have to find something to laugh at every day.
I should have used quotation marks ,on ” Japs ” , referring to the term used in WWII.
Now, now, now. Don’t say ‘ japs ‘.
Well, that’s what my Social Studies teacher told me in 1980!