OK – let’s take a moment and take the planetary Clearing challenge once again. LRH proclaims it’s possible, so it must be true right?
Don’t these amazing “no numbers” graphs prove it? They show them at every event and the sheeple seem to lap them up.
Let’s ask the experts: How DO you get 327 million Americans to cross the Bridge? How DO you Clear the planet? (not just “make Planetary Clearing a reality”)
Well, according to scientology postulated math, all you need do is make every org ideal.
So, let’s look at the BEST ideal org. The “model” that was touted repeatedly by True Leader David Miscavige when he brought in 200 Sea Org members and announced that this was the perfect org in the perfect building in the perfect location AND it was “St Hill size.” LA Org.
It had EVERYTHING going for it. So much so that orgs from around the world were required to send staff to “learn how it’s done” at LA Org.
That was 4 years ago.
Now they are proudly announcing their accomplishments. They have apparently produced so much more than any other org anywhere they are sending it out to the world to hold up as the example of “Make It Go Right.”
Let’s take them at their word. Even credit that all these NED Case Completions are Clears – they’re close enough. They will realize they’re mocking up their bank in relatively short order. Or they will do the Clearing Course and also become Clear without ever realizing they are mocking up their own bank… (How that works exactly is anyone’s guess).
So, 665 in 4 years is 166 a year. Let’s call it 200 so they don’t feel cheated.
There are 150 orgs. Let’s call it 200 also so they can’t complain. It doesn’t really have any statistical significance here. If ALL those orgs were ideal, St Hill size and manned with 200 SO members, they would be making 200 x 200 Clears per year = 40,000. Again, for ease of math, let’s call it 50,000.
The earth has a population around 7.5 billion. At that rate (50K per year) it would take 125,000 years to Clear the Planet.
Provided the population remained constant.
And that’s the big rub. The population of earth is increasing by 83 million per year.
So actually, planetary clearing is becoming more unreal every year by 82,950,000.
To keep the situation static — neither progressing towards planetary clearing, nor backslipping, they would need 1700 NEW ideal, St Hill Size, model ideal orgs right now. They haven’t added 10 orgs to the total in 50 years.
This is reality. Not postulated “we are doing it.”
Planetary Clearing is NOT being made a reality. The planet CANNOT be Cleared. Nearly 70 years and the planet is further away from being Cleared than it ever has been.
This is what scientology actively chooses to ignore. Despite proclaiming they are the masters of confront.
There is something very comforting about your maths. Thanks for doing what you do.
“Look at these amazing statistics,” the two sheepbots say. “Aren’t they incredible!!!”
“Nay,” I say. “My sympathies lie with the poor bloody snails they got drunk after they attached markers on their shells and let them loose on the meaningless pieces of papers.”
“Despite proclaiming they are the masters of “confront”.” Confusion, confabulation, con, and crime just to mention a few words that begin with the letter c.
Okay, here we go! Time for
THE ADVENTURES OF BOB, MARY AND SHAHEEN
(Mary enters through the front door of their house and faces Bob who is seated on the sofa)
MARY(sighs): Well, that’s that. The Aftermath people just came and got Natasha. They’ll find her a place to stay.
BOB: Any chance of her going on the Dan Phillips Show?
MARY: Not with her English as broken as it is. Bob, this girl has been through a lot over the past month. I mean, they smuggled her into the country in a damn cargo container! Then made her sleep on a shitty mattress, eat nothing but rice and beans and then hatted and posted her as a love slave!
BOB: I couldn’t even find that post on the org board.
MARY: Well, now she’s in good hands. I wonder if……
(The phone rings. Mary answers it and, to her annoyance, discovers that it’s Shaheen on the other end)
MARY: Ah, Shaheen! What the fuck do you want?
SHAHEEN: What the fuck do I want? Is that any way to talk to a member of the most ethical and elite group on the planet?
MARY: Based on that comment I know you’re not referring to the Nation Of Islam or the Sea Org so what group have you joined lately?
SHAHEEN: Fuck you, bitch! Anyway, I was calling to find out when you were going to pay what you owe for Dear Leader’s birthday gift.
MARY: Which Dear Leader are you referring to? Kim Jong Un or David Miscavige?
SHAHEEN: You know who I mean! You owe $50,000.00 toward a gift for our beloved COB.
MARY: Hell, girl! The Dwarf’s birthday was months ago! And besides, we’ve been declared in case you’ve forgotten.
SHAHEEN: We’re willing to overlook that! Now about that money!
MARY: GO FUCK YOURSELF, SHAHEEN!
SHAHEEN: COB will not be pleased!
MARY: HE CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF, TOO! (hangs up phone)
BOB: Are they still trying to buy the Dwarfenfuhrer a new boat?
MARY: Yes and I am getting damn tired of it!
(Bob sits pensive for a moment then a smile spreads across his face)
BOB: Honey, I’ve got an idea!
(Two nights later Bob and Mary are watching the news. Dan Phillips is standing in front of the org building. Behind him, all sorts of vehicles carrying everything from rowboats to canoes are pulling into the parking lot, each one playing Ruth Wallis’ “Davy’s Dinghy’ at loud volume. Led by Shaheen, the Squirrel Smashers are trying to order the vehicles to leave but to no avail)
DAN PHILLIPS: I’m standing in front of the Church Of Scientology where city residents appear to be answering an appeal to give boats to the church’s top leader, David Miscavige. Everything from motorboats to catamarans is arriving. I’ve never seen anything like it! Sources state that an anonymous Scientologist has started a ‘Dave Needs A New Boat’ campaign and the boats are coming in like mad! What I can’t understand is why the Scientologists are trying to turn these people away.
BOB: I know why.
MARY: Want to call Dan and tell him?
BOB: He’s an investigative reporter. He’ll figure it out.
(Bob and Mary both break out in laughter as the footage shows a flatbed tractor trailer carrying a garbage scow trying to get into the parking lot and Shaheen angrily ordering the driver to take his piece of shit someplace else)
So they sent Sally Matsukawa (the oriental girl in the bottom row holding up her cert with a smile) to the most Saint Hill Size org in the world.
WHOOPEE!
Let’s all throw a party and celebrate! I feel that CCNashville will gladly pick up the tab!
In Janis Gillham-Grady’s latest book, Commodore’s Messenger 2, she mentions that she asked LRH about what a cleared planet meant. He said that not everyone had to be cleared but just enough people so that there was more theta than entheta (whatever that means).
Given the condition of the world, the massive increase in population and the shrinking, Non-E state of Scientology and auditing, a snowflake has a better chance in Hades.
Well, that’s interesting!
It certainly contradicts what the Dwarfenfuhrer said at the 2007 event about getting anybody and everybody onto the Bridge.
Very interesting. I’ve got to read that next.
Actually , it’s a video. You can see it at TrueLRH. com
Thanx Alcoboy, but I meant Janis’s book. I’m trying to read all the books. Definitely keeping me busy but completely fascinating.
Oops! Sorry!
I was in Hades once. I got a great tan.
Another really great article, Mike. Your real stat analysis should be required reading by anyone in the Scientology orbit.
I wonder what scientologists tell themselves about their empty orgs these days. Maybe they think a critical mass that has to be reached before scientology can expand. Maybe they think scientology will hit it big with the right marketing campaign. Maybe they think society needs to face a big crisis (completely crashed economy, global environmental disaster, etc.) for scientology to make inroads. I think thoughts like this can only sustain you for so long. Eventually, you just have to put failing orgs out of your mind, knowing full well that something is not right.
scnethics,
in the Church of Scientology,. stating what one observes, if it is uncomplimentary and/or if it contradicts what the Church says about itself, is HERESY. Co$’s term for this is “Enemy Line”.
Never mind that it is obviously true and plainly true for anyone to see.
The truth or untruth of an observation about Co$ is not a factor in having it branded “Enemy Line”.
Whether it is complimentary to CO$ and/or in agreement with what CO$ says about itself IS a factor. its the ONLY factor by the way.
One can say something about CO$ that is the most OUTRAGEOUS lie, and if it FLATTERS the cherch, its not Enemy Line.
But if someone states something, however true, however accurate, that is non-flattering, even no intention of being critical, just stating a fact (“The courseroom is always empty lately”) that person is “forwarding an enemy line”, and is taken and handled in Ethics.
Let me translate “handled in
That person is “enlightened” about what an Enemy Line is. That person is given LRH references which “demonstrate” that saying ANYTHING NEGATIVE about Co$, however true, however factual, is effectively HELPING THE ENEMIES of Scientology.
Stated another way: “Say nice things about Scientology or keep your fucking pie hole shut.”
I think they must be looking at those downward zags before the huge increases. They must figure that the present moment is at the bottom of one of those downward zags and they imagine that they’re about to go into a steep upward zig.
Or maybe they’re measuring some new metric of desperation. Number of facts denied? Number of uncomfortable moments? Number of former Scientologists with Youtube channels? Doesn’t Hubbard have one of those “if you’re doing bad, you must really be doing good” kind of quotes to float them?
I can see Clearly Now
I can see clearly now, the PAIN is gone,
I can see all obstacles that were in my way
Gone are the dark Tech that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
I KNOWI can make it now, I blew that place
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin’ for
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
Look all around, there’s nothin’ but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin’ but blue skies
I can see clearly now, I blew CO$ it’s gone,
I can see all obstacles that stood in my way
Gone are the dank Kool Aid that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
Outstanding, BL!!! Bravo!
Thank you OSD…..dedicated to you & your lovely wife & family as well as all the SURVIVORS….(no NOT victims, you brave people SURVIVED & established REAL lives outside the gates of this Hell on Earth).
I was going to throw in a few not so nice words to the song…but, ahhh…it’s good enough as it is!
The lie that is all things hubbard “research” and scn proclamations:
A chain of reasoning forged with a bedlam of absurdities.
I think that before “Planetary Clearing” there was local “country clearing” like Sweden, Mexico, etc… and this rang true for many sheeple. But, as they looked around their respective countries and saw nothing was happening, the “carrot” of “which country would be first” no longer held the allure it once had. In typical SCN fashion, Planetary Clearing was invented, which was the last stop in Miscabage’s attempt to recover the declining number of IAS prey.
At the end of Scientology there will be two billionaires bidding against each other for top humanitarian award.
Early on, Hubblard said that Australia would be the first clear continent. Lots of luck with that.
We were? If the Launceston branch of $camology is anything to go by then the clearance should only take about a million years or so, that is if it doesn’t rain.
Brixntram,
Was that before or after Ron realized there was a ANZO Case,
And wasn’t the ANZO case rundown , a Baseball Bat.
Made us feel special, like $1.99.
Granitt.
Ah yes, I’ve got it!
Hang on a sec… darn… well I thought I did. Even after a decade on staff Scio math still escapes me.
OH, OH OH!!! (arm raised high, pick me, pick me, pick me!!! I’ve got it again) It’s the restimulation of the “Magic Universe!”
For those of you who have never listened to Hubbard’s early dribble there’s a whole series of universes before the one we presently have credit cards in and the Magic Universe was one of them, and it’s a biggie! Puff the Magic Dragon lives there.
Now I can sleep better.
There, you see, Scientology math makes complete sense if you’re a mindless idiot! (the true & only workable definition of the State of Clear).
Hey! I Yawn! Can you give me the directions to Puff the Magic Dragon? If ‘Puff’ means what I think it means, I’m pulling out my bong.
Go ahead and pull out your bong because I think you’re right.
Bongs away!
Yep, Bongsville is on the route. Puff loves the place but he takes many forms and can be hard to identify sometimes. I prefer the simple approach myself… here Puff, come on boy, Puff you there boy? You never need a lighter or matches when you do find him but he’ll singe off your eyebrows and roll over belly laughing when he does that. He thinks it’s a real hoot!
Ill go with you guy’s, but no scio gutter math!
If they have 665 completions, why are there only 17 photos? I keep looking at the photos they post and trying to see joy in the eyes of those people.
I guess I’m feeling odd about the whole thing right now because I spent a bit of time yesterday talking to someone who had never heard of scientology before “Aftermath” and one of the things she said to me yesterday was “I just want to help all those people escape.”
A tough job when ‘all those people’ don’t want to go. I suppose all one can do is look for the casualties alongside the train wreck of a cult.
I tried to explain that to her, but how do you explain slavery to someone who has always lived free?
Bring back the ‘Hole’ and use it.
Brad and Alice Spence—32.5 Humanitarians—(as shown in last week’s Thursday Funnies) are asking very similar questions, Mike. And the conclusions they’re coming to are heading in the right direction…until they make a complete U-turn and force their heads back down in the sand. Rather than renouncing the absurdity of the notion of clearing the planet after 50 years of effort, they double-down on the proscribed solution: just give more money. So near…and yet so far.
‘Just give more money’. Well…at least they’re up front about it.
What has been made real is the increase in Real Estates and millions of dollars for the so called leader!
But despite these millions Miscabage lives in continuous paranoia, hiding and scared of when he will be caught on his scam and, for sure, never enjoying openly his stolen money.
Add to that no real honest to God caring friends and you are talking about a real hell.
Well I’ve got to think he’s enjoying some of it. He has a lot of big boy toys, bespoke shoes, expensive scotch, private chefs, etc. The best of everything.
Except friends to enjoy all that stuff with. Enjoyment comes to Dave when he can observe others in pain and suffering. No shortage there so He must be happy as hell!
Yo Eff Peee ………… tell us it isn’t so!
I would rather have a few “things” and be able to walk in the world with my head held high and not be afraid of my own shadow. Personal preference.
When I was married to my first husband in the early ’80s, when the doorbell rang, my ex would say “get rid of them” and go hide in the bathroom. The best part of getting divorced was not having to look over my shoulder day and night.
I can’t imagine living life like that again, no matter what expensive perks come with it. David Miscavige lives in a gilt prison of his own making.
The answer is simple.
When they reach an acceptable number of cleared people they will just use fair game to dispose of the rest.
Of course this will have to happen before DM leaves his body or it’ll be a hard sell.
But then there is always Tom Cruise to be the circus barker.
It is amazing to me that anyone believes this. I live near Clearwater and see these minions being bussed from their living quarters to Flag and whatever in downtown Clearwater and feel so sorry for them and think, how can anyone be so lost in their lives that they have to turn to this.
Best said was the man in Going Clear when he stated that if they told him it was based on aliens from another universe before he started, as opposed to after he reached OT, he’d have called bullshit and saved himself a lot of money.
If $cientologists lived in the real world, they wouln’t be $cientologists. So yes, the ‘postulate’ about clearing the planet is very real to every loyal $cientologist. The real question is how many of these ‘real $cientologists’ actually believe that crap? Probably not very many.
The only “planetary clearing” I can think of the pretty much worked involved an asteroid around 65 million years ago. I don’t thnk $cientology has the kinetic energy to pull that off.
If they all postulated it in unison they would. Well, they believe it, so must be true-Watch out for that soon approaching asteroid!!
“If they all postulated it in unison they would.” If they did the tonnage of poo and nose wrenching pong would be horrific.
Simplified Math: Planetary Clearing will always be one more fundraising event away.
And when you ask them, “How much should we give?”
Ooh, they only answer “More! More! More!”
Fortunate Son
CCR
I was one of the idiots bussed into the DC Ideal M’Org opening back in September 2009. The E/D gave a speech in which she said, “…and Saint Hill Size is just around the corner…”
Eight years later:
Yo ED/DC –
Whassup wicha bad self?
Now, that’s a mighty fine M’org y’all got there.
High ceilin’s, wide hallways –
Betcha voices echo real good in that there building.
Y’all go Saint Hill Size yet?
Oh, what’s that?
Not yet?
Well, flunk!
That’s a flunk, girlfriend!
Sounds ta me like you got yo’self an MU.
A MOTHUH of an MU!
And y’all know what THOSE suckers can do to ya.
So trot yourself right on over to Qual!
Clear to full conceptual understandin’
that lil ole colloquial phrase, “Around the corner”.
Don’t forget to use it in sentences, like,
“Saint Hill Size is just around the corner”.
Start!
They said that about NY and SFO early 15 years ago
Interesting, Mike. But let’s be fair. They could be using this phrase in the Whole Track sense. If so, what’s a thousand years or so?
All this talk about numbers reminds me of a question I still need an answer for.
If planet Earth’s population is growing so much over time, where are the thetans for those bodies coming from? No real answers on the web so the question remains.
Anyone know?
My tongue in cheek answer is that it is all those body thetans the OTs are relieving themselves of.
mmmm… never thought of that… BTs relieving themselves. A restroom for the soul. No wonder there’s never any toilet paper in the orgs. Gosh, that’s wiping the slate clear isn’t it?
(Groning)! However, great post!
“A restroom for the soul. No wonder there’s never any toilet paper in the orgs.” LOL!
Thanks Valerie. Tongue in cheek is good. But I know a few OTs and each has told me those body thetans were totally imaginary. Not surprising really is it?
Anyway, still curious and looking for an answer.
Valerie nailed it Glenn. Check in with Jive Clive the rabid for his 10,000 ‘on or thru the level’ for the assumed make/break point for the Cult. All those ‘clear’ Bee frickin Tees are advancing on the unsuspecting bodies of the world to inhabit them (as clears) ….. that of course would be cleared cannibals IMHO ….. and thus take the world from the inside out.
To date I don’t think anyone has heard of much less seen any reincarnated $cientologists and the Idle Morgues each have a fully decked out office (including some cool cigarettes) just in case the con man returns for a rerun.
Yo Dave,
Any sightings lately? If He does show up …………….. He’s gonna be really pissed …… especially with yer performance as the greatest ecclesiastical leader of whatever you call it. You are seriously fucked up Dave. Enjoy the rest of yer ride.
Thanks Newcomer.
I personally “know” L Con is never going to reincarnate. Mike knows this too. L Con promised to return as a politician and the only person to claim to be the reincarnated L. Con is some dude who recently announced this. But this dude has a long criminal record………… Oh, wait a minute! Maybe that proves he is truly is L Con returned. Wonder when/if this dude will go back to Hemet and remove Miscabbage. And yes, there are plenty of offices for him in all the empty morgues.
All in all, it is becoming more and more clear that the simple answer to my question is it is all bullshit. Wish L Con was still around; I’d love to put it to him and see what he blubbers out. I already know it would be the most complex gibberish he’s ever spewed and anyone listening would have to fight being hypnotized by it all. Just like all else from him, nothing is simple. But truth is simple so guess that tells the fact.
It’s all make believe. And make believe can be fun! I’m still a Jedi Knight! But if you have to pay for it, that drains all the fun out of it.
Jedi: May the Force be with you,.
Scientology: May the farce be with you.
Maybe they hang around at bars watching for people who hook up, follow them home, and wait to see if they have a new place to land?
LOL, I thought “who is Ned Case”. I so so so much to learn.
Very good Peggy LOL. I had him as a PC once but I left the window open and he blew,
LOL!!!
I wonder if they could get DM for prostitution? It fits.
whore
(hôr)
3. To exploit (someone or something) crassly or unscrupulously for personal gain.
soruce:https://www.thefreedictionary.com/whore
Nah. Once they make him undress and look at his scrawny body they’ll break out laughing and then throw out the charges.
Well Alcoboy, you may have a point there. I have read about the negative effects steroids can have on men. Maybe that’s why he got rid of Shelly – plus if it also causes roid rage, and he’s already an asshat, that’s not a good combination.
The problem here is that they seem to be making more enemies than Clearing.. if we need to Clear “everyone”, then there is already no way that they can do it.. I personally know several 100’s that they cannot ever Clear,. including my own Family.. been there, done that.
Pouring money into empty buildings is so against Lafayette’s policies. I never can figure out how anyone who knows policy gets around this bugaboo.
Cognitive dissonance.
Just like it is an eye opener to recognize the signs of sociopathic behavior, a great deal of $camology behavior begins to make sense when you realize that the reason the bubble is so strong, and they HAVE to disconnect, is the result of the rift between reality and what they choose to believe.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance
God in Scientology? Yup: money. That trumps LRH policy about buildings…
Must be where the expression, “good God!” comes from.
“…the rift between reality and what they choose to believe.”
I’m continually amazed at how so many people believe only what they need and want to believe, whether it concerns the Cult of Scientology, other religions and spiritual practices, politics on the extreme right, politics on the extreme left, their spouses, children, friends, lovers – fixed ideas about just about anything or anyone, despite all evidence in plain view to the contrary.
“Oh, but he was such a nice boy. So quiet. Never bothered anybody. Sure when he was five he strangled a few kittens for no particular reason but that was just youthful highjinks. And then in his teens he started tweeting about killing people but you know how adolescents can have their dark moods…we never dreamed he’d actually…”
And one day this nice, quiet boy goes out and murders innocent people in cold blood, for no reason other than he’s completely nuts, .
I’m making this up, its kind of a composite of many things I’ve read about incidents like this, but there’s ONE common theme in the remarks from those who knew the people that committed these crimes.
“…and we never saw any reason to…we had no idea that he/she…we were completely shocked…”
Yeah, right.
My mother was a public school counselor for 25 years. My wife has been a school social worker for over 10.
A very common refrain from them is, “That one is going to kill someone or wind up in jail…”
The criminal, the sociopath, the emotionaly disturbed are very often known by the school professionals that have contact with them.
BUT until there is a prove-able action committed, there is literally nothing they can do to beyond recommendations for placement or evaluation. The response from the parent is very often “There is nothing wrong with MY child…”
I can’t either. I know they know policy. It boggled my mind then and it boggles it now.
I think the real reason they keep building these Ideal buildings for no people is that the new leader does not really listen to policy and Lafayette but to his new leaders, the celebrities!
I know the old buildings bothered me when I first got in. I’m sure the celebrities can’t stand them.
Who is more important to the current leader,
Tom Cruise or Lafayette?
“Who is more important to the current leader,
Tom Cruise or Lafayette”
That’s an easy one. Tom Cruise.
I believe that the Tiny One saw Lafayette as an impediment to power and was glad when he died. The most important thing to the Little Twerp is turning the Church of Lafayette into the Church of Miscavige.