This is the headline scientology has on their website announcing the "new" org in Orlando. A STAR BURSTS IN “THE CITY BEAUTIFUL” AS A RIBBON FALLS ON THE NEW CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY Complete gibberish. And it goes on for paragraphs, starting with this: A “Magic Kingdom” of a metropolitan region where enchantment is routine, the surreal is real and stars are wished upon, the “Theme Park Capital of the World” is entirely unique. Home to wonderlands such as Walt Disney World, SeaWorld Orlando, Universal Studios and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter among many more, Orlando’s massive playgro … [Read more...]
Search Results for: Miscavige
The Scam of Orlando
The holes in the decaying fence around scientology's shrinking empire continue to grow. Those holes are about the only thing that IS expanding in the scientology world. Today, the Chairman of the Bored is supposed to yanks his ribbon in the parking lot of a new building in an Orlando office park. Last time they postponed at the last minute. They now moved it forward a week at the last minute. Maybe it will just be all CGI - the first Jurassic Park style yanking? They could still show it at the next event along with all the other CGI “fly through” and “exploding graphs” and that’s what is rea … [Read more...]
Massive International Expansion Lies
From the latest edition of Source magazine, the official magazine of the "international spiritual headquarters" of scientology. You can see they are making a big deal about their new "7.5 foot diameter world map" with "12-sided polygon locator pinpoints." As always, scientology seem to impress themselves by talking about the size of their maps or details of their toys. It's as gauche as someone telling you "I have 7,000 square feet of hand-made silk rugs in the entrance hall of my 40,000 square foot home -- and you paid for it." This magnificent new map is apparently adjacent to "Embassy … [Read more...]
There Is No New Church of Scientology in Perth
This is Scientology's headline on their website following David Miscavige's parking lot ribbon yanking: DOWN UNDER’S “CITY OF LIGHTS” WELCOMES NEWEST CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY This is a double lie. First, there is no "new church of scientology" in Perth. There is a new building, but that is not a "new church." It's the same crappy little scientology group that has been there for 50 years and has never amounted to anything. Second, nobody welcomed them, except themselves. Here are a few excerpts of Shermanspeak about the opening: Perth may be far-flung, but the city’s can-do, entrepr … [Read more...]
The Final World Class Ideal Org…
This new poster says a lot. This is the "final world class ideal org for America"?? Wow. Scientology of course has no problem making outrageous statements and blustering on through as though everyone will simply agree because they say so. But I wonder how Boston feels about being relegated to the "non-world class" category? Or Philly? Austin? Detroit? There is apparently NEVER going to be any org in Houston, New Orleans or Charlotte, let alone an ideal one. But even more interesting than their stupidity is how much this reveals about the state of scientology in the age of the … [Read more...]
Lies, Lies and More Lies
I had not seen this until perusing the scientology.org website today. Don't focus on the wonderful passage of classic Shermanspeak -- legendary times on the front porch of infinity indeed. No, try to put that out of your mind and note the claim -- apparently in response to the repeated exposure of the dwindling numbers at his events -- that the event was attended by a "record number" pegged at 6700 lost souls from 70 nations. Of course, this is quite a feat, given the capacity of the venue is Ruth Eckerd Hall that seats 2180 (slightly less with all the cameras and sound equipment … [Read more...]
Thursday Funnies
Though Orlando apparently didn't make their target for opening last week (what a shock?) they are making up for it with an outpouring of promotional pieces that is impressive in it's volume, if not the content. It's a constant flow of travelers... So...? Well, for one thing, they will NEVER find you. If the travelers are so important (like they are going to go on course instead of DisneyWorld?) why aren't you located anywhere they could possibly see you? I'm giving him a cleared planet But he doesnt care, he's handling "Target 2". Plus, you're not giving … [Read more...]
Just When It Could Not Get Weirder…
This is a glimpse behind the smoke and mirrors of ideal org openings from inside the bubble. When Miscavige yanks his ribbon at the Gala Grand Opening of a new building, he expects to see enough staff present to occupy his new palace. But the vast majority of these massively oversized new buildings are in cities where the scientology organization is a small, failing operation with a few staff. Or in the recent case of Dublin, with no staff at all. Can you imagine the CEO of WalMart opening a new Supercenter to replace a lemonade stand and nobody is inside to man the checkouts or stock … [Read more...]
No New Orgs
I have often noted that scientology's claim about "new churches" is a semantic sleaze to try to fool the bubble-dwellers and outside world alike that they are actually expanding. They are not. What they have done is moved existing orgs into new buildings and called them "new churches." And those new buildings are EMPTY. They have not opened any new organizations in a decade other than one in Dublin for no good reason, though they have shuttered quite a number by "combining" them into one. Here is a classic example that highlights the foolishness of this "ideal org s … [Read more...]
WTF WOTF
Truth is stranger than fiction (though the Mission Earth series might disprove this old saw - it's hard to dream up weirder than that). I wonder if any of the WOTF contest winners understood that within a few weeks of being paraded on stage and handed a trophy and a check, their speeches would be being touted at the weekly "graduation" of scientology orgs? Like the people who are tricked into saying something positive about the "social betterment activities" and posing for pictures -- nobody warns them in advance that they will be being used to try to bestow legitimacy on scientology and … [Read more...]