Another in the ongoing series exploring the “explosive international growth” of scientology and its “straight up and vertical expansion,” according to the gospel of David Miscavige.
A Special Correspondent happened to be in Calgary recently and sent in this report.
Although not listed on the official church website, Scientology maintains a Mission in Calgary Canada.
According to http://scientologycalgary.org/ the “Church of Scientology Mission of Calgary” offers:
“a broad range of services from life improvement courses, such as how to be more effective at work, how to know who you can trust, study skills, and many more. We offer free lectures and films, individual counseling and coming soon, the Purification Rundown, the world’s most effective detox program.”
A course on “how to know who you can trust”? Offered by Scientology? Well let’s go check this place out!
4310 MacLeod Trail SW
Suite 201
Calgary, Alberta
Canada
Hours of Operation:
Tuesday 5:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m.
Thursday 5:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m.
Saturday 12:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m.
The Mission is on the top floor in the suite of offices to the left of the sign. The building is located on a busy commercial artery populated by run-down strip malls, car dealerships and fast food restaurants. Pretty much zero foot traffic.
They share the upper floor with “M.T. Motors Used Auto Sales” who, apparently, also offer massages.
I’m assuming the text on the sign is supposed to read “Hubbard Life Improvement Ministry of Calgary” but as you can see someone from the local welcome wagon has already been by to visit. Scientology, making friends everywhere they go.
Just barely clinging to life. This really is ideal!
PS: According to scientology.org official website, there are a grand total of 5 scientology missions in the entirety of Canada.
Doesn’t quite match up up to the ever increasing “11,000 churches and missions” the church keeps telling everyone they have. When it comes to scientology, the whole of Canada is flat out and vertical.
Re: Scientology Calgary Expansion: Flat Out And Vertical.
“Nobody cares. Nobody’s interested.”
At least in that location you KNOW THERE IS A SPOT FOR A TRULY HAPPY ENDING! And it probably only costs 20 Canadian dollars!:):) YEAAAAA, that’s the kind of auditing we want!!LOL!
“straight up and vertical expansion,”
Rather like Mr Bransons latest rocket test!
Interesting that the paint is the color of blood. Nice subliminal messaging.
And for those on a budget, get a massage. Maybe for a good tip you get the happy ending?
On the issue of shrinking, in Melbourne Australia,in recent years, the Church sold it’s CBD location (now a Chanel Flagship Store) and built an Ideal Org in suburbia, great for passing foot traffic and overall visibility. They then opened a Scientology Information Centre in a not so ideal CBD location to field initial inquiries and move people onto the Ideal Org. I now note that this has been dropped from their website and an internet search shows the location was leased in June this year with vacant possession. Guess the general public of Melbourne are not beating a path to their door.
I’m just not of the mood or energy to respond to this tonight as much as I could, but it does remind of my yesteryears and coming out on Marty’s blog a couple years back. You can can check that out under “Alaska” in the categories on his blog.
… a broad range of services….. -above an auto body shop-. Ok ok, I said I wasn’t going to respond..
A Scientology Mission, a used car dealership and a massage parlour…make the theta choice, people, and buy a used car.
Massage, please!
At first I got a little shock as I thought it was blood. Creepy looking. Amazing that they leave it like that. But now that its on the Fringe of the Internet I’ll bet David Miscavige orders it to be cleaned. Funny.
That’s what I thought too, Aqua. Appropriate.
I’m curious, why not use the name SCIENTOLOGY ? Is it legal in Canada to practice the faith or is it considered a CULT? Why has Davey Boy not learned his method does not work and try to change the lies and deceit and violence that follows him?
Looks like Walter has crawled back into his hole. So much for confront and shatter. Bye Davey!
This is O/T to today’s topic, but I thought very interesting in light of the ‘Shermanspeak’ phenomena. I found the article at The Dish.
‘…research has shown that patterns of language can be good indicators of deceit in fields outside of science.
…
…wrote with more certainty when describing his fake data, using nearly one-third more certainty terms than he did in the genuine articles,” the authors wrote. “Words such as ‘profoundly,’ ‘extremely,’ and ‘considerably’ frame the findings as having a substantial and dramatic impact.”’
http://dish.andrewsullivan.com/2014/11/11/from-the-journal-of-dubious-studies/
Some people see the Virgin Mary in cloud formations. I see Slappy’s head exploded and dripping on the Dianetics symbol.
I see it Bognition! It’s like a Dali painting, the tapestry of lies is meeellllllllltiiiiiiiiinng!!!!!
It would be awesome if somehow we could organise a synchronised effort of recent photos of most orgs around the world and put together a “Thursday Funnies” poster showing how “clear” the entirety of Scientology really is.
The comment ” Scientology – DONE!!” Would have a whole new meaning. Ha!
Why can’t we? I got Houston Mission covered. It looks pretty pathetic and its totally surrounded by iron security fences. Very Scientology Prison looking.
Ah, Mike, how little you really know! Of course we can’t show the whole sign!! If we showed the whole sign, as the only group in this sector with effective tech, everyone would freewheel out of control and wander the streets of Calgary all night like teenage girls at a Justin Bieber show! Moreover, Mr. Bieber himself went clear at this very mission and is no exterior working his way to Target Two to perform for LRH, who knows ideal music when he hears it. Its clearly logical! OTIII was posted on the internet in the 90’s and then- BAM!!!!!- Ebola. See? Logic!!!!!
I’m again very disheartened to see that you and your quivering conglomerate of cantankerous cretins still blindly fall for “photographs” as if that represents some sort of “evidence”. That’s so obviously illogical as the photographs posted in Freedom show a mob of people trying desperately to salvage themselves with workable tech, even though you can only read part of the sign. The thetan knows what the thetan wants. We had to put up a fake massage sign and offer free unicorn rides, just to distract the people (and identify the degraded ones) long enough to recruit another 2000 Sea Org members from Tajikistan to send there and we still have 10,599 missions left to cover! By they way, you’re a turd. David Miscavige has not personally read, revised, reformatted, and/or taken credit for this comment.
Hey Lip, Got a chip on your shoulder?
I found the picture of the paintball leaking over the sign to be the most telling. Here are people who claim to have mastery over MEST, but who are unable to get themselves sufficiently together to borrow a ladder and spend ten minutes with a glass scraper cleaning off the window. It’s kind of sad, actually — that some clever Anon would do this and they are so wallowing in self-pity that they can’t even recover from a relatively trivial act of vandalism.
Glass scraper? Don’t you mean newsprint and vinegar?
Newsprint? No way! Someone might read it first, and go PTS.
note that the landlord scrapped the paint off the building… and left the window
Ahh… I think you’re missing something. The sign wasn’t noticed until now, they have been so busy they didn’t have time to look up. Even if they did see it those inside the bubble must be told exactly and specifically what to do at all times. Self-determinism in any form is viewed as counter intention. Dave is a busy man trying to remember all his lies but he’s onto it now.
The idea about the glass scraper is good though – they are recruiting now if anyone is looking for employment, 2-3k week plus benefits, interested? Scrapers and paper towels provided and long term remuneration guaranteed by honest Dave’s employment agency.
Clear your glass now!
Aside from the creepy looking exterior, I noticed they are not open very many hours. How do start someone on the bridge to spiritual freedom if you are only open two or three days a week for a few hours?
And I would bet that someone dropping in and checking would find that they’re not even bothering to show up for a reasonable percentage of those few scheduled hours.
Very common representation of mission hours (Not one for one but many).
As I recall those were the hours posted for the Stockton Mission which is owned by Freedum Medal Winner Rohn Walker. That was when they still rented a commercial space. Word has it that the mission has moved to the home of an OT VIII in town who is apparently mission ED.
Another straight down and vertical expansion now approaching a permanently horizontal position about 6 feet under.
I think Rohn also still has a mission in Reno and Thailand. They are probably doing great!
Maybe now – but in the 70’s (when missions were in caves, not Ideal per Miscavaige by any means) they were open 9-11 five days a week and a little shorter hours on the weekend.
Oh – and the ones I remember were booming – lots of traffic, lots of Pd Comps, good GI Divided by Staff statistics, lots of public flowing up to the local churches, etc.
They only need to be able to complete a reg cycle or two and then have the seals study at home on an extension course. Oh yea, they also need to be sure the CICS have a garage with enough room to put a pallet of basics into.
Though Calgary does have a few GO/OSA/DSA people. I noticed that Don Whitmore (who was the one charged and convicted of infiltrating the RCMP for the GO) recently moved to Calgary. Maybe they’ll clean up the out ethics field in Calgary, safepoint the area, and boom the misson.
Al Buttnor is back in Alberta, but I don’t know if he’s in, out, or all the way out.
Every funny thing in this world is slightly funnier in Canada. A down-in-the-dumps, pathetic, ramshackle, empty, pointless, soul-sucking Scientology outpost is funny. But in Canada, they add red paint accents, just to boost the laughs. Turning it up to 11, so to speak.
Something about the positioning of a RCS mission with a used car lot and a massage parlor that makes me laugh.
They for sure can learn something from each! I wonder which one Dave would pick first? Hey Lou, want to weigh in on this?
One stop shopping. Get screwed buying a car, get screwed while getting a massage and then get the mind fucking of your life!! Lol.
And Tony …. at the CoS you always get your WALLET massaged! (But alas …. no happy ending!)
As I recall, the Ottawa ORG isn’t any better than that mission, and with similar neighbours.
Scientology is a ghost town hiding a mass grave of spiritual seekers.
Hey Walter….could you at least get someone to clean up that sign?
Walter are you there?……oh you are next door receiving services at the
massage parlor…..I see. You are probably receiving better service than
what one can get at the place with the painted sign next door.
Possibly you should go after the local city counsel to get rid of that
stupid car dealer ship.
Love that picture!
The state of affairs in the church of scientology. Perfect picture representation.
I think I’d rather have a touch assist next door…
🙂
The Gentleman’s Hand Wax at the car dealer /massage parlor? Hahahaha!!!! At least the Mission staff can make a living wage if they go across the hall to work there.
+1 LOL!!!
with a “happy ending”…
You made me laugh so hard that coffee came out my nose….
They are flat out and horizontal or downward.
I think we all know the reason why Scientology’s not more successful in Canada, Mike: Most of the target cities have downtown aquariums. Have you seen the one in Vancouver? It’s fucking massive. How is Pope Dave supposed to compete with all those fish and tourists? CICS nature lovers.
Aha, ofcourse! The whales go to the aquariums instead of orgs.
That’s it edge, you nailed it!
“other fish”
Not a good indicator.
Wow…I am impressed by this monumental emptiness and the never in history 47XXX straight vertical plunge. But, ‘nobody cares’, so, no worry.
I always thought scientology expansion was “straight DOWN and vertical”.
six feet under and horizontal
Dave,
My guess is that if you ask politely, Mike might allow you to use some of his photos for your next Clubbing of
the Seals.
That is an “Ideal Mission” compared to the “missions” I saw in Europe. Basically tool sheds or garages filled with unused materials.
Canadians are early spotters of BS.
And they have obviously figured out ” how to know who you can trust.” If one cannot be trusted, know them by their red badge of a traitor.
Yo dave,
About time to take a road trip up to Calgary and get that hole squared away don’t you think. I think you would not make it back out of town good buddy. Your shoes and styled hair are a DEAD givaway.
Truth!!
Flat-lined and horizontal.