They actually sent this out.
Perhaps the most blatant admission ever that their photo ops are staged fake news.
No doubt this photo (if they actually got anyone there) will be touted as evidence of how booming things are with “10x the number of graduates at ASHO” or some other blatant lie. What is so amazing is that the participants become willing partners in the deception, almost proud that they are helping to show the world how scientology is expanding.
Hey Miscavige, why don’t any of your “celebrity” useful idiots in scientology apply for these choice roles
Maybe the guy who could yank it all away from you in a heartbeat, TC, should take over and get on with KSW?
Hubbard knows, you, Miscavige, are fucking it all up.
Cruise, go for it! Scientology needs you. So are you with me? Let’s clean this place up.
Maybe if they got enough poor smucks there with a few payed actors ( OK …. more than a few ) and gave them all certificates they could spell ” WE ARE ALL A BIG FAT LIE ” or won,t there be enough smucks , probably not .
Still very sad and totally pathetic the lengths that Scamology will stoop to .
My only surviving scientology cert is my Minister of The Church certificate which miraculously survived in the bottom of a trunk. It wouldn’t do me any good for the photo shoot since I’m probably defrocked.
Richard, it wouldn’t matter, and might be the most-real cert there. At least you EARNED the cert back in the day, so it’s that real. That you’re not in good standing wouldn’t matter, as they’d accept trained apes if they showed up. My certs rarely lasted the day before hitting the round file. Even at the time, they didn’t mean much to me.
This may be a silly question, but I’ve always wondered…..do the certificates come framed or do you have to pay extra for that?
ANYTHING extra costs extra. I’d be surprised if gradutes don’t have to buy their certs for $100 or $1,000; over and above the incredible costs of the “courses”.
Are you kidding??? NOTHING in the Cult is EVER free!
Since the whole thing is fake and they want bodies for a photo, I want to show up and be in the photo holding a cert.
Please Jeff Please!!! That would be sooooo funny.
That would be fantastic!!!!
You’d think they’d just hire actors. My God – handing out fake certs just to get people to show up! Arent’ they embarrassed? And the Still Innnies, given how Scientology is expanding so exponentially, with leaps and bounds, in epic proportions, and so forth, aren’t they wondering why there aren’t enough S/Is with REAL certs for this photo op? Or are they too suffering from Only One Syndrome, meaning, “Every other org is expanding except OURS”? Amazing, amazing amazing how fucking dumb these people are!
and it’ll take ALL DAY to get the shot “just right” THEN Dwarfenführer will reject every shot and they’ll have to come back next week. ANOTHER evening standing around in the heat and they won’t even have cool water for the participants. How many will faint from the abuse?
I want to show up with my middle finger.
Well, I presume you take it everywhere, don’t you? You may not always display it, but it’s generally a package deal with the hands.
That would be hysterical! Maybe enlarge and frame an Aftermath Foundation Card…
Show up with a copy of the “please call” Billboards. That might be instantly effective as the guards point them out to everyone as they try to move you and your protest sign out of frame. Bet you’d get a 10% success rate… Say they get 18people; that’d be two families reconnected. YAY!
hey! What are they paying? Union scale, perhaps?
You have just increased their security costs by a factor of 10x. Not even Grant Cardone can do that. Good job Jeff.
When I’ve seen some of the other contrived and faked photo ops recently, I’ve wondered if the members who get sent these ever start to ponder why Scientology has to resort to such dishonest and deceptive propaganda techniques – and if it gets any of them wondering just how much that’s dishonest and deceptive they’ve been subject to.
yes, you are correct, some of us members did ponder.
I was once part of a video op at my local org in 2011 for to be shown at the next DM mandatory 4 times or 6 times a year “Event”, which were not LRH approved as “events” took away from production time, translate into making money really.(LOL).
We where made to walk very fast to going into the org, like we couldn’t wait to be “on course”. We had LRH books in our hands and course packs, told to be uptone.
After seeing the video op during the next “event” and all the stats on how this org was booming, I did ponder doubt, for the stats were not true.
Then on Jan 1st, 2012 I got the Debbie Cook email. My doubts turned into curiosity and for the first time I researched scientology on the internet. Thus began my journey, my research, out of scientology and hubbards crap.
scientology is a word op, a photo op, a video op, and a SMP op.
LOL
AS Tory Maggo says, it’s the Trumen show.
Wow! Thanx for that info. I’m so happy you are out! Woot woot!☺
Maybe this is a Tom Cruise wife hunt.
Scientologists are the only ones who have the tech for that.
I am constantly amazed at what they come up with!!!
🙂 Jane
Hey Tom! Give it a rest. You’ve already struck out with three women. And you’re getting old.
HE’S GETTING OLD, BUT HASN’T GROWN UP.
Ha Ha, now that is hilarious!
That poor sap Tom Cruise never had any body thetan figments, but he sure has sea-org thetans clinging to every part of his life now.
Try-outs to be his girlfriend, how pathetic is that!?
I wonder how many listening devices and hidden cameras are on everything Tom Cruise owns.
Miscavige, as he swirls his scotch in his evil lair, must have fun watching Tom Cruise pop zits and trim nose hairs.
I guess that’s Scientology being busy. Nothing else to do.
Still not up on all the acronyms, so I googled ASHO. I learned that it can mean “a very beautiful girl, always smiling and kindhearted,small and she’s a little shy” (Urban Dictionary), or perhaps the “Asian Society of Hyperthermic Oncology,” or maybe a Burmese tribe? I was pleased to see that the “real” definition didn’t actually show up. 🙂
a bare ASHO gave me the same results though one looked promising until the link turned up dead. Adding Scientology to the search brought up corporate $cn’s site on the IDEAL ASHO and the rest of Pacifica. I gotta say the new ASHO looks better than the one I studied at (briefly) in ’75.
When I was a newbie I used to think ASsHO** every time I saw that acronym and wondered if anyone else did too.
Ha! If I was in LA, I think I’d show up with an OT 15 cert!
Please let me know when that happens. I just gotta be there.
Yea. That’d be great.
Would love to show up with my Golden Rod and my Silver Cert from AOLA, Permanent Class 6.
You’d be the Bell of the Ball, Mary.
I would love a $camology certificate.
Those things aren’t going to be available for much longer.
I want one of those “Freedom Medals”…you know Kyle, the ones that look like a Tin Foil wrapped around a piece of chocolate……mmmmm….chocolate!
Ah yes, the Freedom Trinkets of Past Bad Mistakes. Maybe Ebay will have ’em. They are certainly worthless, but they do have their kitsch value I suppose.
You guys. And gals are too funny. Love reading your comments
Keep it up!
Of course, if you don´t have one, they will issue you a authentically certified faked one, complete with the signatures of the Keeper of Seals and maybe even the cob!
That offer will be honored for two hours maximum!
PS: The new ones and the aboriginals are worth the same!
Just the same forgery as all the minister certificates the cult manufactured and submitted as proof the person qualified as a minister of religion for US immigrant visas and green cards. Each certificate was a complete lie and sadly the US government didn’t challenge a single one.
What’s an “Aftermath” card look like ? Where can an average Joe get a pack or so ….??
http://theaftermathfoundation.org/volunteers/how-you-can-help/
Aaron has them on the Supporters fb page. You can download them and print them out.
The “AFTERMATH OF THE PHOTO SHOOT”…the next day…
Superior Officer: Hello, Dingdong….
Dingdong: Yes Sir, how can I help you?
Superior Officer: Yesterday you were handed a faux certificate to display during the photoshoot but you
failed to return it us & I am demanding you return it NOW or else.
.
Dingdong: Yes Sir, that did slip my mind…..(hehehehehe)
Superior Officer: Well, bring it in now or there will be severe consequences.
Dingdong: What could be worse then what you’ve already done to me, disconnecting my family!
Superior Officer: How does two months in the “hole” sound to you, I ain’t screwing around…
Dingdong: For your information Asshole….while you were busy cleaning up AFTER the damned
photo shoot…I BLEW…..that’s right, I made a break for it & succeeded. You’ll get
no more money from me…AND I am WITH MY FAMILY NOW…
After touting “47x expansion”. “more expansion in the last decade than in the last 50 years combined” and other blatant lies, stooping to this casting call is another lowest ever.
What kind of mental gymnastics must scientologists do to push away the obvious and justify support of a blatant deception?
I want to make up T-shirts that say “Cult of ScienceFictionology!”
Name your price, Ed.
In my mind they would be priceless!
Ooh, a new name! I love it.
I,ll have one of those tee shirts as well
Why not a T-shirt with the text “The Whole World” as a smiley and the text “fooled” on the backside.
I wonder if the church has lists of people who havent shown up for things like this or Ideal Org openings or events or done a course in a year or so.
Lists of UNDER THE RADAR. ?
Of course they do. Remember the neighborhood field trips a few weeks ago. There was bragging about the quanity of names and addresses.
A man is walking down L.RonHubard Blvd in LA and passes a group of SO members banging their heads against a brick wall.
He approaches one of them and asks, ‘Mind if I ask you something?’
The SO member says, ‘No, not at all’.
The man asks, ‘Why are y’all banging your heads against that wall?’
‘Oh, that’s simple’, the SO member answers; ‘because it feels so good when you stop!’
Belynda, I think you’re on a roll!
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into an org…………..
And they all get into a fight and kick the shit out of each other.
Is it in spite of or because of their OCA scores?
Desperate times call for desperate measures… ::said with a bit of irony::
LOL, I wonder what they would do if you showed up, maybe with an Aftermath T-Shirt
If they saw you wearing an Aftermath T-shirt, they could go blind.
“If they saw you wearing an Aftermath T-shirt, they could go blind.”
OH OH! I see a DM fundraiser. With the help of scientology for a mere $250,000 donation you can help these poor blind people see again. DM will be doing his eazy peazy money sueezy dance.
Do you think He can dance? His best shot at it is walking around in a room full of mirrors. Then add some smoke and Yo Dave will be right at home.
And where the hell is ole Effy Poo today. Probably still chortling over his last comment Dave let him send.
“Do you think He can dance? His best shot at it is walking around in a room full of mirrors. Then add some smoke and Yo Dave will be right at home. And where the hell is ole Effy Poo today. Probably still chortling over his last comment Dave let him send”
Well, now that’s not a pretty picture is it – Yuck.
And, so the person you are referring to – is that the person who claims they are out of the cult, but did all the required “stuff”, got out, yet defends the cult and LRH and DM etc.? Interesting. Not surprising, but interesting. How anyone can defend LRH’s idea that children are adults in small bodies just gives me the creeps. That should be a deal breaker on anything that snarky fake ever said.
Nah, just pneumonia, sort of like OTIII I think.
Well, just remember, when your nose is runny, you may think it’s funny, but it’s snot.
Whoop, whoop! Here’s my chance. I’m going to make them give me an OTVIII certificate. Then I’ll be done and won’t have to pay a million dollars to get it.
When does the party start?
You can have my VIII cert.
Had a new one made for myself which read:
Truth Revealed:I’ve reached the level of infinity dupedumb eh dom.
No, just keep it, sugar. You paid enough of your life and money for it. I’ll just grab one of the free ones they’re handing out.
I would have brought my Oh tea Ate bracelet along but I melted it down into new wedding bands for my new life and new wife. Soooo much better than it was awhile ago.
Yo Dave,
What do I miss most about being a $cientologist?
Nutten good buddy, just nutten at all! I did a full reset followed by a hard start and life has never been better!
I always thought the Ship would have faked the OT VIII bracelets too, as in just gold plating or gold leafing. If it was real gold then at least you got something out of Scn! Congrats on your marriage.
WOW…………….LET’S SEE:
Fake OT9 and OT10 Check
Fake OT levels Check
Fake Class 8 Training Check
Fake SHSBC Check
Fake missions Check
Fake orgs Check
Fake SHs Check
Fake Ideal orgs Check
Fake ideal AOs Check
Fake Delivery Check
and now………..
Fake graduates Check
seems right, to go along with
Fake leadership Check
I THINK WE ARE DONE HERE
And the ‘fakes’ have it! Congrats!
Foolproofjunior,
I can’t help but think that your list is incomplete, ie:
Fake Religion………………………………… Check
Fake LRH school accreditations……… Check
Fake LRH military awards………………… Check
Fake navy…………………………………….. Check
Fake science………………………………….. Check
Fake research………………………………… Check
Fake results…………………………………….. Check
Fake Ministers………………………………… Check
Fake help…………………………………………. Check
Fake TV……………………………………………. Check
Fake game………………………………………. Check
I am convinced that the CofS has taken fakeness to a new level on this planet. Perhaps they will go down in history as the cult of Fakeology, or Lyingtology as has been stated before.
How about “A genuine copy of a fake Dior?” – Thank you Allan Sherman!!!
“Junior”, you’ve a ways to go before you match FP’s trolldom.
“Junior”, you seem to be on the other side of the fence from FP, joining in our lighthearted J&D
jere Lull,
i don’t know about fence-siding but Foolproof and I both have a love of insouciance and ever-so-subtle jabs at doctrine fools.
I. Am. Speechless. Any action you have completed. If you don’t have one you will be given one. I hope Fred doesn’t mind being called Jennie and holding up a student hat completion certificate when he hasn’t even walked inside the door.
I pity the poor Sea Org member who has to stay up all night churning out fake certificates so they can fill the ASHO steps with fake completions. Actually, I hope that is a wake up call for that Sea Org member. Can anyone at or near ASHO get some Aftermath Foundation cards to that photo shoot?
What Valerie said.
Mike, this is hilarious!
Hmmm…as long as they’re prepared to churn out fake certs, if a bunch of us Declared But Still Not Declared types showed up to help, could we get ersatz Goldenrod? I’d settle for a fake Declare! What about the rest of you?
I want my declare! If you get yours, could you ask for mine too? I would come get it myself, but my grandson has a baseball game Friday and family is oh so much more important.
I know! I know! I’ll print up some goldenrod sheets that say, “He’s not the Messiah…He’s a very naughty boy!” and we can hand ’em out at the event.
The cult of Scientology puts their greasy fingers on the scales of justice for someone like Masterson and they also lie in press releases/photos about their expansion news This is like a child hiding under a blanket feeling indestructible because no one can see him as he spouts off. Good luck with that strategy Miscavige. Peek a boo, we see you.
Yo Dave,
I’ll be there. Have Julian the Ethical bring my Ess Pee cert along. Big Party on El Con Way.
Word has it that if any Whales show up they’ll get fake Humanitarian Awards. Celebrity Centre D-Listers will be there for their fake Emmies, and Tom’s fake Oscar is all shined up and waiting for him and looks better than the real thing!
I want to be in a cool hip-hoppish video. I want to groove around and do the hand gestures, like they do in IAS videos. I want to look stupid doing do, like a 50-something white person acting hip-hoppish.
hahahahahahahahahaha
“Bring your framed certificate of some action you completed. If you don’t have one you will be given one.”
I had a major movement today. I was on the seat for what seemed like hours. Do I get a prize?
Only if you have a cert to go with it.
That means I have to leave my seat.
Yes, OSD, if you have not yet received your cert for being a Bowel Movement Completion, one will be given you.
BM completion is much more satisfying than BSM certified comp, just so you know…
Blast! Your second sentence ruined my proposed comment about showing up with a framed photo of a 154.94 centimetre tall (5′ 1″) poo that strangely resembles the Demented One complete with cat coughed up furball on top that looks like a big pompador.
I thought that since the Robot Technology Center cancelled the Briefing Course they only graduate people who are RPF clear.
An “RPF clear” is attained after your toothbrush has circled a toilet bowl 100.000 times.
X’s son scores!
Can i frame the front of my “don’t be culty” shirt and bring it there. I will even hold up a couple of “aftermath” cards in my hands. Come on DM, i will even do it for free.
Wow!!! How obvious can you possibly get?!?!??? How embarrassing for them.
“How embarrassing for them.”
Yes, one would think so, Meryl. But I’m convinced that these people don’t get embarrassed.
Yeah, I keep forgetting that!
I think it’s interesting that this is being called a “casting call” when they aren’t looking for actors. The summons wants scientologists to come in and bring any (framed) cert they have. Too bad the church doesn’t do a “casting call” for ALL declared SP’s in the field for the photo op. “AND BRING YOUR GOLDEN ROD!”
I’d show for that with a picture of my torn-apart family. They’s probably have a bigger turn out.
I liked this but not because I like it but because it made my heart hurt.
Mary;
I would love to show up with my goldenrod but I have never even seen it.
I have never even been told verrbally by any member of the Church that I have been declared.
Either they cannot confront SPs as well as they say or they cannot confront their product; an attempted murder.
Just wow. What a good opportunity for a clever person to make the most of this. ie Sacha Baron Cohen…..are you available? lol #whoisamerica
SBC, you’re awesome! Hard to stop laughing!
Hey, didja notice, the guy with the big mouth and poofed up hair-do is wearing lifts in his shoes.
Now who fits that description?
I wonder if someone in the Scilon art department is making a ‘little’ joke.
Naaaa… they probably got the little clip art from some little website,
or maybe borrowed the little idea, a little.
Anyway, it’s all on DM, a little.
Fake photo shoot for a fake “religion”? Sounds about right…In fact the only two things 100% real about Scientology are the hole it imposes in your bank account and the well documented documented litany of lies.
“IF YOU DON’T HAVE ONE, ONE WILL BE GIVEN TOYOU.” OMG. That makes this such a lie! Wow.
You’re not shocked…are you?
Wow.. just wow