Could not resist the title.
Just a laugh on a Sunday morning to accompany Tony Ortega’s now highly anticipated “Sunday Funnies”.
This latest casting call would indicate they have not yet shot the needed footage for the release of the New (old) Mark Sooper 8 e-meter. Cannot imagine what else they would need a (hairless) hand model for. And as usual, at the last minute there is a frantic request for a shot the following day in Hemet. Typical RCS “planning.”
From: “Marie Bystrom via Casting Networks” <[email protected]>
Date: October 30, 2013 7:09:35 PM PDT
Subject: SCIENTOLOGY PROJECT- 5/Other/Non-Union/
| Casting Notice | |||||||||
| Project Name: | SCIENTOLOGY PROJECT- 5 | ||||||||
| Project Type: | Other | ||||||||
| Rate/Compensation: | $150 and $30 gas | ||||||||
| Shoot Dates: | 10/27/13 | ||||||||
| Project Type: | |||||||||
| Message:
We are doing several close up shots of hand-talent; both men and female. Shots are being done Thur the 31st. If you fit the description and is available, please submit. Marie Bystrom |
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| New Mobile WebSite! Click here to submit to this role on your mobile device | |||||||||
| PLEASE DO NOT RESPOND DIRECTLY TO THIS NOTICE. | |||||||||
| If this project does not fit your specifications, click here to update your gender, ethnicity and e-mail options in your actor profile. | |||||||||
“We are doing several close up shots of hand-talent; both men and female. Shots are being done Thur the 31st. If you fit the description and is available, please submit ”
Is available! Are these English speaking?
thank you for answering. i have read OT3. i think i know what you are referring to.
i should have accounted for that. thanks.
Way to go, Marie, at least 7 typos and grammatical errors in this one little ad. Go home and get some sleep. You’re making a bad impression for DM.
Every morning I wake up wondering what weirdness will come from the Co$ this time…or are they all out of ideas.
Haven’t been let down once.
What’s the big deal with race? I know many Hispanics and a few of African descent who are very light skinned. WTF kindof photo are they taking where that would matter? Can someone tell a if a hand was Caucasian and who would care? So stupid!
These hands is beautiful (need gender change).
http://beautysaloon.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/hands.jpg
These hands is for DM and his minions.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m20zj6KljP1ro9n99o1_r1_500.jpg
These hands is for Scientology 2.0.
http://static9.depositphotos.com/1085342/1095/i/950/depositphotos_10957067-Hands-with-victory-sign.jpg
Note: Scientology 2.0 is a term copyrighted by Graduated.
https://www.mikerindersblog.org/aaa-corporate-scientology/#comment-21993
i was just wondering about something. maybe an indie can help clear up my confusion.
leys say a PC discovers through auditing that they lived 80 trillion years ago, and it reads on the meter. it’s confirmed however way that’s done.
how could that be if Ron says man started to evolve only 76 trillion years ago?
i guess it’s the same question as how can multiple people claim to have lived the same life. for example, more than one person claiming they were Marilyn Monroe. somebody has to be wrong or can it be true?
If they have an incident prior to 76 trillion years ago, chances are it is a lifetime on a different planet or solar system. And your other question is answered on OT III. The tech is available to you in the Indie field and not much money to pay for it.
I never said I was Marilyn Monroe.
Though I wouldn’t have minded being Jack Kennedy…er….before that nasty head shot and all that.
I’ve personally audited several PCs who thought they were Jesus Christ and a few who claimed they were Napoleon.
Marilyn would have been a refreshing change.
Well to answer why some people run being famous people pretty much answers itself.
Doesn’t invalidate Past Lives.
Actually the Ol’man says 66 Trillion or something like that back in late 51 early 52 when we was all into mapping the Time Track and he wrote “What to Audit” or what’s those damn Brits called “History of Man”.
Turned out it was maybe a little longer than that when they started running R3 at Saint Hill.
-Hey you Captain sir!
-Say
-This are be “all hands”
-RPF at once!
Okay, this is not fake Mike.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yx8_ahakrSI
The ad forgets to mention the other side of the hand — where acid will be used to remove the fingerprints. no witnesses …
I’ve submitted mine: A hairy hand and modeling my middle finger
Unexpected escape from the trap by a soft-spoken soul: 1 of 7
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laEIpPjPWRg
They forgot to specify that the hand should have a long visible middle finger to be show it to He….after all He deserves it.
I’m continually amazed that the expensive KCET building in Los Angeles that was supposed to house Mad Hatter Productions still languishes unused. Aren’t there hand models with resumes in Los Angeles. At least more than in San Jacinto?
My understanding is that with the Mark Super Duper Better-Late-Than-Never meter, the 6th finger is for hitting one of the alert buttons that makes the whole thing go live in Dave’s office whenever his name is mentioned. Red button for uncomplimentary thoughts, or when unknown bank accounts or other assets are pulled during ruds or sec checks, Orange for when he’s not mentioned during the session at all or if your name or Marty’s are mentioned instead, Yellow for any particularly salacious sexual incidents, and green for kudos for Dave. Winds up being a pretty active finger (on the first 3 buttons).
Don’t forget the zapper for behavior modification.
Makes me wonder if Dave isn’t just doing another audition to enhance Tom’s sex life…
This movie “The Hand” was remade with Michael Caine. The original was, I believe, Peter Lorre.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=he58B8gjfBc
There’s also a Rebecca Romijn video about the “Hand Bra” ….
Whey!
I am Spanic, Caucasian, Non-Unionized for now!
And is available
But why do they discrimate Unions?
So Scientology is only for the “few chosen”
Casting calls are leaking very regularly lately. Was it always like this? If new and exciting, is the change likely to indicate initiative from a new source, or simply reflect a lack of staff available (and up to the exacting standards)?
Not enough hands (anymore) in the “Church” or … looking for the IDEAL hands for the IDEAL e-meter?
Is this a gay thing? Twinks shave your hands. ????
Hey — we’re not hairies, we’re fairies, be waries!
I thought Shelly had nice hands. Not too hairy.
Sort of surprised he doesn’t use his own perfect palms for the shot. Lord knows he’ll never blow and expose the crimes of Co$ top management.
LOL. You gave to be able to pretend you know how to operate an e-meter. But you’re right he wouldn’t expose the crimes of Co$ top management, but if he DID. he could always get some attorney to say he doesn’t even know top management, and that it is a religious matter to be handled internally.
Maybe Shelly has too many broken fingers from Lou?
Hey! I “is available”! Sadly though, they can’t even get a casting call right. In the message they say they want shots of both male and female hands. But in the box below they only specify male models. So which is it? Proofreading tech, guys. It works.
It came from beyond the wrist, from deep in the Carpal Tunnel, to wreak havoc and horror!
Fingers so flexible, they can pick up a dime, or grasp a check or credit card with an unbreakable grip! Can you come to grips with The Hairless Hand? Opening soon at a theater near you, on, natch, Palm Sunday
The title is priceless. I’m going to use it as a pick-up line.
Could be the only tax-exempt hand modelling job ever.
But all seriousness aside, with millions of members, don’t tell me they can’t do this in-house? Really? There isn’t one Scientologist who would fill the bill, much less do it gratis to help the cause?
These are the end days.
This is how it ends. They can’t find a hand model that meets DM;s approval, and the whole thing collapses.
They could call George Costanza.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZxX3-rJoNI
1 subg,
You don’t understand.
With all of the nail biting, cleaning toilets and floors with tooth brushes, digging graves,
changing the landscape when Tom C shows up, lack of sleep, staff members hands show the toll of the labor. Would YOU use the hand of a slave?
They cannot possibly be used for such an important task!
Greta
No no. THIS is a job for Thing Addams of the Addams Family!
I like the “If you is in the area.”.
I’d love to do get the hand job, but I’m apparently too old….
LOL
So, from the millions of Co$ members they can’t find one with nice hands? Hell, it’s “close up shots of a set of male hands”, not a face shot of the next to blow. And, yes, I “is available”
The problem with using talent at the Int Base to model the new e-meter is that their skin tone is so pallid white from years of being in the hole, and the skin is loose and floppy from the diet of beans and rice. They would only be a good choice for a model if you’re doing something promoting a zombie costume. And they just missed Halloween this year.
Out of the millions of Co$ members they can’t find one whose hands aren’t hairy.
Now THAT is funny on so many levels. No staff have hands that are good enough?? Not like a face they would need to eliminate after the person wakes up and gets out. I love “If you…is available…”.
I is available! And I have hairless hands! I’ll bet they bestow OT 15 on me for being so upstat!
Interesting point. What comes to mind is that Miscavige is probably telling all the staff they are so incompetent, that no one can hold an emeter can correctly, and he has to go pay a Hollywood actor to do it.
In a way, he is probably right. Staff are so out of practice getting to hold emeter cans, that they can’t do it. And the ones that have had recent (last 10 years) experience only know to clutch the cans nervously, as if they were being interrogated or something…
Mike, that title was so funny I laughed my ass off just reading the title alone before I even got to the article. And then it was funny again. Thanks for the great laughs today!
Got to hand it to you Mike, it looks like “Carpe DM” is losing it as far as promo, permits, deadlines, shoot schedules, tents and oak trees. If he can’t grasp (even with all five fingers and the thumb in the photo) that instead of successfully leading a world religion, he has completely botched his stint at management and may well be remembered instead for his tenure in Federal prison- he is in for one hell a hell of shock. Imagine the relief when he is gone!
“Got to hand it to you Mike,”
I’ll just leave that there.
I’d like to update my gender, please.
Perfect.
You have got to be kidding me. Is the six fingered guy for real ?
I did know some really hot female ASS Models, would that help Davie ?
anybody, anybody ?
Yeah right next to the two headed baby, the bearded lady and the space alien that looks a lot like Miscavige which is next to the Church of Scientology ad in the National Enquirer.
I see that only “Caucasian” hairless hands need apply.
Wonder if they’ll be hit for violating the CRA?
Hmmmm
No they would not be in violation of the CRA. That is precisely and uniquely what the “ministerial exception” is about. The actors in this instance are being hired to represent “ministers”.
Like there’s no such thing as anything but crackers as auditors these days.
No wonder them and NOI get along so well.
They’re sorta like the reverse image of the same thing.
I mean even the LDS is trying to present the image that they’re just one happy interracial family.
(Which I sure has Smith and Young spinning like tops within they’re respective graves.
But anyhoo…)
Yet it seems that the Church of Scientology is making great strides backwards these days in Social Consciousness, Justice and Civil Libertarianism.
Not at all the same Organization I signed up with back in the ’70’s.
Sad.
Then of course this is all about releasing the Mk Ultra meter.
(I wonder if the name is intentional or just a Freudian slip.)
And you look at the CIA which compared to all the other Government agencies still looks like the Billionaire’s Boy’s Club.
Though I doubt if there is any connection.
Really nothing there folks so let’s move along.