By a Special Correspondent
This image was posted by a sharp-eyed commenter over on Tony Ortega’s blog. It shows a full listing of Scientology Portlands statistics for a series of weeks leading up to March 13th.
Scientology goes to incredible extremes to hide the actual numbers associated with its various organizations and always publishes “graphs” that are just meaningless squiggles devoid of any dates or numbers.
These two boards show Scientology Portland, Daytime Organization and their race for improved numbers to celebrate L Ron Hubbard’s birthday. And well done to them indeed, you can see that on the final column they make “done” to tell everyone that they indeed did make their targets.
You might recall that the opening of the Portland “Ideal” Org was accompanied by massive expansion of audience attendence through the use of photoshop – which you can see here. Also to scrape up the staff to get this org up and running they closed the CC Portland and folded the staff into the new Portland Ideal Org.
But the real bonus here is that after the opening of Portland Ideal Org, they started circulating one of their fake graphs, which you can see here:
They boldly state that the number of public introduced to Scientology for the first time has leaped to 110. Well that leap obviously did not last long, if it was ever true in the first place. According to these boards, first service starts reached a blow out peak of 4 in one week. In other words, the same level as is represented at the start of their graph.
The other statistic – number of raw public routed into the org is so irrelevant that it doesn’t even show up, but they do note that they sold a whole 14 books to new people that week.
So lets take a look at what is really going down in the Portland Ideal Org. I am sure many of you will have something to say about these numbers.
These are the numbers they set themselves for 3 POINTS (ie a 3 week Affluence trend which tells you how low the stats were before their final week push):
- Fully Hatted Staff – 27
- Gross Income $35,000
- Gross Book Sales $4500
- Value of Services Delivered $12,000
- Well Done Auditing Hours 100
- Money Paid for Training $15,000
- GI By Staff $750 (which shows that total staff is around 46 people)
- Bodies in the Shop 170
- Number of Books Sold to Raw Public: 14
- Number Intro Services Completed 40 (these services can and are taken by existing Scientologists)
- First Service Starts 4
- Active Scientologists 83
This shows just how dead things are on a week by week basis in Portland.
And what a $10 million plus investment and GAG II can produce.
The most interesting:
100 Well Done Auditing Hours? That is FOUR auditors low level production (and it includes PURIF “hours” and OBJECTIVES).
4 First Service Starts — this is NEW PEOPLE in and includes them watching a FILM.
Really, these stats are the same as small orgs were making in the 1970’s. MANY Missions made way higher production than this (all dollar figures are inflated compared to earlier times — but the hours and starts are not).
And though I don’t know the outcome yet, this org thought they had won the international birthday game as the “fastest expanding org on earth.”
The first scientology city isn’t looking to be happening any time soon.
And THIS is what Kansas City is shooting for. Wow.
The stats are ok. In cologne an indie org, we have no 170 BIS but more FSS. It is not right that to look an film
Is an first service only paid service like pe course. To watch an film is an introservice. I am against the destructive handlings of the cofs but i am not against her. I was an member and i ve had good times.
David Miscavige destroys my religion and that is my problem .
Well Espiando, in fact they don’t even follow their own green on white.
A prime example is the Church of Dave stats regularly posted by Mike on this blog…
Even on the Student Hat Course (one of the first courses done by students of Scientology) all students are taught how to make a graph to record their “student points”. They are taught that ANY statistic is meaningless if it is not graphed against TIME. In other words, if changes up or down occur in an event or production unit, the graph is supposed to show over what period of time did those changes occur.
This is also a standard in business.
As Mike has pointed out many times, the Church of Dave’s statistics are almost always meaningless because they usually just show a picture of a brightly colored graph arrow going wildly up over God-knows-what period of time at God-knows-what rate increment. Add to that what is often a vaguely defined or false statistic and the graphs in their promo are nothing more than pretty pictures with lots of exclamation points.
So no, whatever one’s opinion of Green on White, The Church of Dave ignores it when following it gets in the way of misleading its parishioners.
Thanks to the cult, the phrase “figures lie and liars figure” can be reduced down to three words: “Green On White”.
Off topic but I just found out that comcast/xfinity is having a free hbo preview starting April 6. I really, really hope they include Going Clear! Millions more viewers will be able to see it.
A 2009 Gallup poll found that 69% Oregonians identified with a Christian religion and so Portland Org is going to get a pretty heavy dose of reality (SRA) after HBO’s March 29th release.
Laura Turner at the “Religious New Service” yesterday shows that the Christians are really “piling on” this HBO Docu… There’s obviously some pent up resentment too.
Good PR area control DM
“Scientologists do not want you to see Going Clear, which is all the more reason to go. There are bits about Tom Cruise and John Travolta that will surprise you, but the most shocking stuff has to do with the regular people who bear the brunt of this cult’s secrecy and abuse. The Church will continue to try to discredit the filmmakers and participants, but that will only have the effect of piquing curiosity–and, hopefully, eventually, bringing about its own downfall”
. – See more at: http://lauraturner.religionnews.com/2015/03/16/going-clear-scientologys-coverup-efforts-hbo-documentary/#sthash.kvjNdoLK.dpuf
Funny how every single person in the United States of America is totally free to surf the internet for information about anything…except for scientologists in good standing. And, as soon as they break that rule and start looking at what people are saying about their religion, they are brought in and “handled.” They either close their eyes, thought-stop themselves half to death and deny, deny, deny or they are declared suppressive and disconnected from any loved ones or business associates, or facebook friends who are still “in good standing.”
It is a fascinating study in how truly cowed and mentally crippled people can become when under the thrall of a true sociopath who they believe holds the keys to the kingdom of heaven.
In Scientologese, the earlier similars are the fairy tales they heard as children. And they no doubt loved their kool-aid back then too.
Les, this is a most succinct description of what has happened and will happen over and over….it’s a sad state of affairs.
The HBO title “a prison of belief” sure “captures” the condition of the members of the Church of Scientology. It’s a mental prison, complete with thought police….
I tried to make this point to my son before I got declared. Everyone was allowed to use their own powers of deductive reasoning except Scientologists in Good Standing. Here is the real crazy-making logic:
My son did NOT WANT to read anything negative (Entheta) ABOUT THE CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY or David Miscavige.
WHY? Because my son did not have overts against it or David Miscavige. One ONLY has a desire or curiosity about what’s on the internet or in books because they have prior overts.
I kid you not. This is the “Logic.” This is where the thought stopping kicks in: “To prove I don’t have overts, I will have NO DESIRE to read entheta about the church.”
Yes, and I’m sure Galileo had overts on the universe too as he kept looking and writing about it.
Hans Christian Anderson wrote a story about a swindle similar to the one Miscavige is carrying out against his own members and anyone who believes the church is growing and has 8 million members:
“Before the procession the swindlers sat up all night and burned more than six candles, to show how busy they were finishing the Emperor’s new clothes. They pretended to take the cloth off the loom. They made cuts in the air with huge scissors. And at last they said, “Now the Emperor’s new clothes are ready for him.”
Then the Emperor himself came with his noblest noblemen, and the swindlers each raised an arm as if they were holding something. They said, “These are the trousers, here’s the coat, and this is the mantle,” naming each garment. “All of them are as light as a spider web. One would almost think he had nothing on, but that’s what makes them so fine.”
“Exactly,” all the noblemen agreed, though they could see nothing, for there was nothing to see.
“If Your Imperial Majesty will condescend to take your clothes off,” said the swindlers, “we will help you on with your new ones here in front of the long mirror.”
The Emperor undressed, and the swindlers pretended to put his new clothes on him, one garment after another. They took him around the waist and seemed to be fastening something – that was his train-as the Emperor turned round and round before the looking glass.
“How well Your Majesty’s new clothes look. Aren’t they becoming!” He heard on all sides, “That pattern, so perfect! Those colors, so suitable! It is a magnificent outfit.”
Then the minister of public processions announced: “Your Majesty’s canopy is waiting outside.”
“Well, I’m supposed to be ready,” the Emperor said, and turned again for one last look in the mirror. “It is a remarkable fit, isn’t it?” He seemed to regard his costume with the greatest interest.
The noblemen who were to carry his train stooped low and reached for the floor as if they were picking up his mantle. Then they pretended to lift and hold it high. They didn’t dare admit they had nothing to hold.
So off went the Emperor in procession under his splendid canopy. Everyone in the streets and the windows said, “Oh, how fine are the Emperor’s new clothes! Don’t they fit him to perfection? And see his long train!” Nobody would confess that he couldn’t see anything, for that would prove him either unfit for his position, or a fool. No costume the Emperor had worn before was ever such a complete success.
“But he hasn’t got anything on,” a little child said.
“Did you ever hear such innocent prattle?” said its father. And one person whispered to another what the child had said, “He hasn’t anything on. A child says he hasn’t anything on.”
“But he hasn’t got anything on!” the whole town cried out at last.”
How old is the Scientology Portland?
At the end of the 1970’s I was living in Portland, part of another cult. At the time I had NO idea it was related to Scientology. (Lifspring, Inc.) One day hanging out with my friends we decided to traipse into the Scientology store in the midst of town, and I think it was Portland. If not, SF. Giggling and hanging on each other we walked in. They chased us right out. Someone at WWP told me it was because LRH told the cult to avoid Lifespring members. It must have been written all over our faces that we thought Scientology was a joke.
What I remember most is that the whole damn place was filled with one thing. Books, books, books. And they all looked the same. Picture of LRH beaming. Just like the Christian Science Monitor stores. Shallow and false cheery.
im from the ptld org n I recall the Life Spring thing. We were told that group had been OUR group members but had stolen the tech, altered it and become their own group. Baaaad.
Really! omg. hahaha. It was a totally separate corporation i.e. Cult. I did the trainings in WDC and then they hired me for the Portland office. The headquarters were in SF. I was pad a VERY high salary. No one had to live anywhere. BUT there were so many other things that were similar with Lifespring and $cientology, not the least of which is Lifespring turned out to be bad for the health. THREE people died when I worked in Portland, one of which was about to go to trial until the victims family and John Hanley settled.
John Hanley, Werner Erherd (EST) and LRH knew each other. So the similarities lie in the tech. Maybe LRH and Hanley fell out. I don’t know.
What did they say about EST?
straight up and vertical!
I was in downtown Portland on Saturday and walked past the Ideal Org. It looked empty and there was nobody around, despite the fact that the bustling Saturday Market was taking place only a few blocks away. I did enjoy my peek at Ron’s “office,” though. The building itself is beautiful — I hope someday it can be transformed into something more useful.
There was a HUGE line out the door at Portland’s famous Voodoo Doughnuts, which is also in the neighborhood — maybe the Scientologists could try using “doughnut tech” to get public in the door?
If they had DOUGHNUT TECH, I’d hand over all of my money! You just can’t go wrong with DOUGHNUT TECH!
I agree! I work nearby the org in downtown Portland and can never,ever find a live body to talk out of joining. So dissapointing!
Why not, since Dave is so fond of holes.
Got it.
Now, expanding on this theme, in place of the double wide trailers Hole currently at Int Base, these could be leveled, and an immense, round, doughnut-shaped building with a huge hole in the middle built, a hole that would need enough acreage to accommodate the activities of the many, Holees who will flood into it once it is built, per Captain Miscavige’s stable datum, “Build it and they will come”.
Holees will literally live in this hole and all their activities will occur in it except for being security checked, which as LRH mandated would only occur in the Doughnut Building.
To be truly On Source there would have to be a pole in the center of this hole for those on SR to run around, built of course to the exact specifications of Ron years ago – an Ideal Pole in this Ideal Hole, as it were.
All in all, this Ideal Hole would compare in capacity to that arena in ancient Rome where the early Christians and other out-ethics cats interacted defensively with real cats from India and Africa and so forth, as part of their spiritual rehabilitation on the path to their life-changing cognitions about the Roman Empire.
The Church of Scientology has its own Cathedral; now it needs its Coliseum.
Its what Ron always wanted. The time is now.
Well said Aquamarine. Then those tenants of The Dunked Donut Domicile can truthfully assume a holier than thou attitude.
Thatsa pass on the Alliteration and Pun Tech, Michael 🙂 There isn’t a hole lot more I can say. (Groans).
Those stats are roughly in the same range as those of the org I worked at in 1980. But there is one that just doesn’t add up. GI $35,000? That seems way higher than I would expect from the other stats even adjusting for inflation. I would expect the GI to be more in the range of $8 – 12, 000. Perhaps the extra came from no exchange IAS donations?
Almost without doubt. They get Birthday Game points for “IAS donations” these days. You can bet they pumped that up for the last week of the Birthday Game….
Agreed Interested Party. Around that same time I was checking the stats of all orgs on the Planet before they went to WDC. The GI is off. BTW, those stats are much higher than most Class IV orgs back then. However, this is a one week, end of Game week. Not sustained.
As a whole, class IV/V orgs have NEVER been successful enough to pay their staff members. Scientology was just not popular enough.
Imagine that. Fifty years supporting a dream and telling oneself “tomorrow they will come in in droves!”
Some Definitions of terms:
PDC: Paid Completions- the stat of the ED. Basically a points system that keeps track of how many people completed a paid service. From memory I think it was 40 points for a major service and 20 points for a minor one, but I am not certain.
PTF: Payments to Flag- stat of the Flag Banking Officer. Calculated as a percentage of last weeks income. Basically it is how much money the FBO was able to steal from the org and send uplines to management for their onewonderful “guidance”.
QSH: Qualified Staff Hired- stat of the recruiter. It’s a point system (cant remember how it worked exactly), that tracks how many staff were hired that week.
FHS: Fully Hatted Staff- Can’t remember who’s stat (I must have an unflat Straightwire). Number of staff who have completed their Full Hat, and that have done any auditing that is necessary for their post. Basically it’s the number of fully trained staff.
GI: Gross Income- Total amount of cash that came in the front door from all sources.
GBS: Gross Book Sales- Bookstore Officer stat. Total dollar value of books, meters and insignia (eg Clear bracelets etc) sold.
Dept7Coll: Department 7 Collections. Department 7 is the department of Income (very churchlike). Total amount of money bought in through this dept. Usually from chasing freeloaders and getting them to pay up, but also from straight reg’ing.
BILLSPD: Bills Paid. Disbursement officer stat. Total dollar value of bills paid that week.
AUDPTS: A measure of how PTS Aude is [joke]. Audit Points- Stat of the department of Records, Assets and Materiel. It is a points system that measures how up to date the orgs accounting is.
ASSETSRES: Assets and Reserves- stat of the department of Records, Assets and Materiel. Total value of money in the orgs Building Fund account, General Liability Fund account as well as the value of all the desks, chairs, vehicles, etc etc that the org owns.
VSD: Value of Service Delivered: Technical Division Stat. Total dollar value of all the major courses and auditing that were completed that week.
STP: Student Points. Stat of the Course Supervisor. When you do a course you get points, based on things like how many pages your read, drills completed, words you looked up in a dictionary etc. The total for all students doing a major course is the student points. You also get bonus points for completing a course.
WDAH: Well Done Auditing Hours- Auditors stat. Basically, the number of auditing hours that an auditor delivered that the PC didn’t hate. Purif hours are included, but I think that they are only counted as half. For example if a purifee spend 30 hours in the box, it would only count as 15 WDAH’s. Co-audit hours are also included IIRC, but it must be a paid co-audit.
MPT: Money Paid for Training- Stat of the Qualifications Secretary. Total value of money paid for major training courses. Theory is, that if the Qual Sec, is doing a good job of making sure the course rooms are standard, they will magically fill and so lots of MPT will be collected.
QTSM: Qualified and Trained Staff. To be counted, here you have to be through Staff Status 2 and have done your basic hat. Basically it’s the number of staff who are off probation and have some clue as to what they are doing (as opposed to Fully Hatted Staff, who are supposedly masters of their domain).
GIBY: Gross Income Divided by Staff- that’s what it is.
BIS: Bodies in the Shop: Once upon a time this used to be the number of people who set foot in the org who were on some sort of paid service, or did an extension course lesson. Judging by how high this stat is for Portland compared to the other stats, I think it has been changed to total bodies that were tricked into coming through the front door.
NISC: Number of Introductory Service Completions. I think this is what the old BIS was- number of people who set foot in the org who were on some sort of paid service, or did an extension course lesson.
NBSRAW: Number of Books Sales to Raw public. This is the number of books that were sold to someone who had never bought a book before. Note that if you sell 5 books to one new person, that would be 5 NBSRAW,
FirstSts: First Starts: Number of people who start a basic, introductory course, for the first time.
6BComps: Division 6B Completions. I think this is a point system. It’s the number of people that complete a basic service.
RESIGNMAJ: Resign Majors. This is the number of people who finish an intro course and resign onto a major course. This is the point where you are handing the mark the glass filled with Kool-Aid. When push comes to shove this stat is often made up of 8 year old kids that just finished “How to use a Dictionary” and their parents are cajoled into buying them a purif to “Play the Birthday Game”.
FSMC: Field Staff Member Commissions Paid: When you bring your friend into the org and that friend buys a course or auditing, you get a commission- 10% for auditing and 15% for training. This is the total volume of those commissions paid.
NAMF: Not actually sure of what this is. But I think it is total money collected for the IAS.
ACTSCN: Number of Active Scientologists. This is the total number of people who did anything at all; from mentioning the word “scientology” out loud in public to going on course. It’s the number of people who might not hang up on you right away when you call and say you are from the org.
NUMS: Number of Memberships Sold (I think). Number of IAS memberships sold. Includes free 6 months memberships given away for free to new suckers so they can get a 10% discount on that $30 intro course, and so the IAS can fill their mailbox with spam for the rest of eternity.
Ideally you get a new Mark in the front door, sell him some books, then get him onto an intro course which they finish in a day or two. They go wow, holy taxation batman, and want more. You then sell them a training package and recruit them onto staff. This person is known in the business as a “Board Lighter” because in one fell swoop they get pretty much every stat in the org up.
I can think of a gang of auditors, C/S’s, & various GOI’s in the SO that would of given anything to zombie bite me! However they missed! Take care every kind & strong spirit on Mike’s blog.Ann Watson.
Off topic, but you should really see this. Over on WWP BlackRob posted a series of letters from COS lawyers to HBO about the Going Clear documentary.
It has been a while that I laughed so hard. 🙂
https://whyweprotest.net/threads/scientology-ready-to-sue-hbo-for-copyright-infringement.124428/
Yes, there are two things of note about these letters. I was going to do a posting about them but just have not had the time:
1. They are not sent on behalf of Miscavige. HE is the one that is talked about throughout the film, yet they pick up on tiny comments about the “inch wives” and now they are sending letters on their behalf (Miscavige’s lawyer Bert Deixler now represents Jenny….)
2. Why are they not addressing ANY of the allegations about Hubbard or Miscavige? Not a single one of them. All they are doing is saying “they are all liars” — but the most damaging things about Hubbard come from his ex-wife and the most damaging things about Miscavige come from him being shown on screen on his styrofoam Nuremberg Rally style sets.
Well there is really no need to say any more than “They are all liars.” because it includes Hubbard and Miscavige as they were speaking for themselves. Stupid is as stupid does!
Yo Dave,
The best event I ever attended was the one(s) that were shown in Going Clear – $cientology and the Prison of Belief.
Pouw and Deixler draw lines in the sand and threaten HBO about the film. Then they move the line, and make more threats. How embarrassing for them.
Where is the injunction or copyright action? Where are the lawsuits on behalf of Linson et al? HBO and Gibney could not be very worried. There has been no copyright infringement because Miscavige allowed massive amounts of material to either fall into the public domain or to be delivered to Lawrence Wright. There will be no defamation lawsuits because the truth is the defense, and Miscavige cannot risk dozens (or more) of Debbie Cook-like videos going viral.
Karen Pouw comes across as the most unprofessional, incoherent spokesperson in recent memory. The typos make more sense than her arguments. Are we sure her letters were not written by Mr. Howard from the Howard Howard Howard and Howard lawfirm made famous by the Three Stooges?
The letters are dictated by David Miscavige. Karin Pouw is one of his nom de plumes. She is not allowed to send anything to the media. Even Deixler is told what to write in these letters.
The biggest oddities: Deixler is Miscavige’s attorney. There is about 1000X more said about him than Jenny Linson or my ex-wife (I think they are only shown in the AC 360 “inchwives” appearance) — how come nothing from Deixler on behalf of Mr. Miscavige?
How come no “defense” of L. Ron Hubbard? His ex-wife (Sara Northrup) eviscerates him.
Crickets.
I have it on good authority that the letters are written by one of the junior partners at Wephuckem and Howe.
the ‘ignominy of the once-involved’ is right up there with the ‘bitter apostates on the fringes of the internet’…someone should design a tee-shirt!
Mike, do you know how a Class IV Org is dealing with new public that know the gist of the OT levels?
In the past, NOT A SINGLE WORD was ever mentioned. Not even on these blogs. But, now it IS general public knowledge that the OT Levels are auditing Body Thetans…
Any new public interested in Scientology will at least read something on the Internet and OT III is one of the FIRST things that will come up. It is the definition of Scientoogy today.
So, how the devil do they mix old staff and the old public at class IV Orgs with the new public that are blabbing OT III materials? Same with missions?
This secret is so fundamental to the Scientology organization, and the growth of the “religion” that it’s hard to imagine what they can/will do about this “common knowledge” of OT III coming from raw public???
Robert — no idea. I imagine for the most part they look blank and say “I have no idea what you are talking about.” In other words, no “handling” at all.
Tommy Davis’ response in the Panorama interview is highly instructive on how a Scientologist deals with it.
Mike, didn’t OT III become public back in the mid 90s with the lawsuit of: Church of Scientology vs. Steven Fishman and Uwe Getz? Fishman entered the OT3 materials into the court proceedings to show how he was driven insane.
Your comment will have a whole new meaning after Going Clear launches on the 29th.
Robert A. … “new public”? … don’t think the CoS has to do with that problem too often.
I called OSA UK after I found out about Xenu. (This was back in the late 90s, however). I was told flatly that it was all rubbish put out by liars, squirrels and guttersnipes.
In the mid noughties, at the height of my kool-aidedness, OSA advised me that I couldn’t join staff because I had viewed “confidential” OT data online. This was despite having been regged into the SO a few years prior (I thankfully “routed out” just days before completing the EPF). Many conversations were had as to the exact nature of what I’d viewed, what my thoughts were on it, etc. Even though I STILL wanted to “go OT” and save the frikkin’ planet, I guess I was deemed too much of a “risk” (no doubt in case I blabbed to others).
Unless the cult comes clean about Xenu/BTs, those few coming in who do ask about it will inevitably grow weary of being bullshitted. The more they lie, the more people will seek alternative sources for information and then it really is game over.
For anyone reading here who doesn’t think these dismal stats can be blown into a thing of beauty, I say you haven’t been fully introduced to the beauty of Scientology “Acceptable Truthing”,
For example:
You: “Is this phone call being recorded?”
Reg: “I am not recording you.” (Red record light blinking on the phone while the conversation is occurring.)
How, you ask, is this not a flat out LIE? Simple. The reg is NOT recording you, the machine in which he is speaking is recording you. The reg did not say the phone call was not being recorded, the reg said I, am not recording you. The reg, the person himself, is not recording you. The machine is. Therefore, the reg managed to “acceptable truth” his way around the fact that your call was being recorded.
And there, ladies and gentlemen, is another rare glimpse at some of the “ecclesiastical scripture” on which the “hardcore elite” of Scientology are trained.
Chuckles, Valerie. What you’re describing could also be termed, “It depends on what the meaning of ‘is’ is” tech, taken from President Clinton’s response to the question, “Is there a relationship?”, as re his then intern. Now, don’t think I’m being political because I liked Clinton am largely apolitical. I got a big kick out of the blowback to that response of his, and told my friends, “Actually, there are 13 definitions for the word ‘is’ “. The cult I think is really run by attorneys now, who are good with language and its nuances.
Aqua,
If only it were a joke. I know it is funny from a distance but, I was drilled within an inch of my life on “acceptable truthing.” “Greatest good” and all that blather is deadly serious business.
I hear you, Valerie. I was never staff. Looking from this viewpoint of what you’ve described as having been trained to smoothly, skillfully lie, to having been trained to flow out falsities with just enough truth in them to be believed while eliminating from your appearance the outward signs that one would normally display to others when doing this – I’m so sorry, Valerie, you’re right, this is in no way a joke or in the least funny, and I’m not laughing.
After the 29th of March there will be new meaning to Dave’s words of ‘Drill baby, Drill’
“Acceptable truth” to “make it go right”.
Bodies in the shop. What a telling phrase that is, right up there with Wogs. You are a lesser being UNTIL you give them money.
Zola, keep in mind that they were also called “raw meat.” Still shaking my head that I got involved with this cult. Just call me Raw Meat OSD!
Raw until they have all your money, then you’re cooked!
When you really think about it, raw meat is much more disparaging to those inside that those outside.
What do you do with raw meat ? You cook it, and then it is “done”,
The thing is, I’d rather my brain remains in its raw state than get “processed”.
It’s much more useful to me in this way, thank you very much.
Are these stats combined for Day Org and Foundation?
I agree Mike, the WDAH are very telling. Take away the purif and objectives and what have you got?
I’d guess not many. Hell with that kind of production they only need one HGC auditor and even then that
person would be sitting around doing nothing most of the time. Truly a testament to the workability of “Miscaviges’ Tech”.
In Vietnam we won all the battles but
Lost the War. The Punching Pontiff has
turned this into a Science.
Portland is where people do not get Suntans, they Rust.
Santa Barbara is cursed by the Ogre of Reed Slatkin
and never recovered from the Slatkin Bankruptcy.
Not to mention David Mayo and the gang.
If they didn’t have to pay for staff, utilities, giant-building maintenance or books/materials AND they didn’t have to send any money uplines AND they could maintain this $35,000/week super-affluence on GI every week for almost 6 YEARS, that would get them to the magical $10 million they invested in the ideal org. And they are in the running to win the birthday game??? Game over.
The sad thing is that it’s not a bad return on investment. It’s 1.8 mill a year gross, say 1 mill net. It’s around 10 percent annual return which is good. This will be a higher than usual weekly gross income due to the push.
It shows the disconnect of scientologies balance sheet vs it’s standing with the public.
@Sony – that would be true if there was no Scientology presence in the city to begin with. If however the Ideal Org has only succeeded in doubling the stats then it is in fact a 5% return which isn’t so hot. If the stats are flat or declining (almost certain) then the money is an outright loss. But on the bright side for Dave – at least he didn’t have to contribute
Mike, that is why the leader selected the re-do of Purif and Objectives; it is a fast, surest way to get well auditing hours straight up and vertical.
I guess he could not wait for auditors to try to do 40 hours a week with NO public, so, take the easiest route. After all is for PR purposes.
They could get more people in by offering restrooms if only they could afford tp.
” I heard from my Uncle however, that they were going to escape soon. I am sending them money.”
I love the smell of escapees in the morning. Smells like … Victory.
Someone asked me why I stayed so long, my response was “they mess with your head.” He still doesn’t get it. He said “I was in a cult too (Youth for Christ), you just walk away.”
He has HBO. I hope on the 29th he will get it.
Those true stats are very heartening. It means more and more people are getting it before they have to go through it. I would rather try to explain it to someone who shakes their head in disbelief than try to fix that same person after they get damaged.
” I love the smell of escapees in the morning. Smells like … Victory. ”
It’s like the new underground railroad. We can call it Daves Shortline Express.
It would really be helpful to the non-Scn folks here to see an annotated version of these two charts, explaining what all the abbreviations and column headings are, and what each of them mean in practice.
You can correlate the abbreviations by abbreviating the stats that Mike found worth mentioning. FHS, which is on the right chart, 4th down is Fully Hatted Staff, 5th down is General Income, and so forth. There are a number of Scientology-Sane English, as I think of them, glossaries and vocabularies on the net to help one figure out what a fully hatted staff is, or what Div6 refers to.
This Is from Xenu-directory(dot)net:
Hat, verb
To train for a post or job. “He is fully Hatted as the MAA.”
http://www.xenu-directory.net/glossary/glossary_h.htm#H
I’ve recently been reading about the archeology behind the study of the Sumerians and the discovery of the the Hittite civilization, and it strikes me that the Portland stat board is probably as unintelligible to the never-in as were the Sumerian cuneiform tablets to the people who first unearthed them.
Avenger – I love studying about the Sumerians and their stories about creation of the human race, etc. Did you ever read, “The Gods of Eden?” Someone from the Freewinds told me that I shouldn’t be reading nor promoting that book. The author references LRH in the bibliography.
Oh no. I’m so non-compliant. Here’s the link for the book. haha. http://www.amazon.com/William-Bramley-Gods-Eden/dp/B00N4FV7EQ/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1426809191&sr=1-2&keywords=gods+of+eden+william+bramley
Enjoy.
although miscavige and this current form of the group is on the road to collapse, it actually hasn’t reached critical mass yet. it probably will, but it isn’t quite there, miscavige still has a chance to weather these storms.
when things get down to this level, you have to let the natives run free if you want any hope of avoiding death.
the best and IMO the only thing miscavige can do to mitigate imminent implosion is to initiate a rebirth of sorts, perhaps frame it along the lines of a “cultural revolution”, where he takes all pressure off the remaining members, spends money directly on them with no strings attached. basically make it a happy place to be.
in other words let everyone who’s at the end of their rope inch up a little bit so they can tighten their grip and have something to hold on to.
he’s not likely to change his approach but if he suddenly threw everyone a massive change up he could still survive pretty much intact.
but can a scorpion change it’s nature?
i don’t know that it matters, but wasn’t the Day and Fdn Org combined? If that is the case, I think this could be an old graph, as you can see it is called the “Day Crusaders”.
Hi Mike
Do we know what “active Scientologists” means? Depending on definition, that seems like a devastatingly low number. I live in Kansas City. I was only in the org once 40 years ago on a SO org mission that ended up causing me to blow (Being told that letting a young woman with an insurance settlement and an amputated leg believe that Scientology could restore it was my Waterloo).
I did see a video a few years ago of their E.D, talking to a couple of members of Anonymous. She was fairly reasonable and respectful of them. Stood up to them, but no real hostility. Obviously she doesn’t, or didn’t, stand and chance. On the plus side we have great barbecue!!!
Well, it’s one of those nebulous stats that are routinely fudged. It’s something on the order of anyone who is participating on a course or auditing (not sure if Extension courses are supposed to count, but I am sure they do) as well as anyone who FSMed a selectee and probably anyone who volunteered for some sort of “community activity” for the church.
Put it all together and it is pretty much everyone in the local area who is in any way involved or active in scientology — these are the people who potentially will show up for an event in the org.
Someone calls the CF, Mike, and asks if they were active this week. You could count doing a touch asist, nerve assist, disseminating to someone or applying the tech on yourself.
Just to keep the peace, we would say that we were active this week…then we’d get off the phone and LAUUUUUGHHHHH because our stat was that we posted on Mike Rinder’s Blog!!!
Bwahahahhaha! Well, we were helping other Scientologists get access to “Standard Tech,” weren’t we? heh heh
They don’t call much anymore, and we don’t pick up.
What is an Active Scientology? This was in the Scientology “Tech Dictionary”
Active Scientologist: Noun from L Ron Hubbard and Scientology definition 1950
Someone who did not hang up on a Scientologist doing call-in
Someone who bought a book at a “Stress Test” table at a local witch fair
Someone who smiled at a Scientologist and got “in comm” while they were passing out Personality Tests at a Baseball game.
Someone who walks in off the street lured in by the Open House sign. They don’t do anything or buy anything – they just walked in and looked around and walked out
Any Scientologist that did a service sometime in the past or bought a book. They are on the fringes – not actively coming to events or donating money. They are considered a ” still in ” and not asking too many questions – they don’t have to be on services but they are not asking questions. That is the KEY. They are at – Don’t want to know – on the Tone Scale. You may find many OSA Agents hovering here.
Or they come to those lectures where they serve dinner beforehand. … just for the dinner.
I think it’s time for an update of ‘What Is Scientology’ to clear everything up.
“(Being told that letting a young woman with an insurance settlement and an amputated leg believe that Scientology could restore it…)”
Just like the Ventura mission did with Raoul Lopez, a man who suffered brain damage in a vehicle collision – they found out he had received a large settlement and they started milking every dollar they get out of him.
http://www.holysmoke.org/cos/books/raul-lopez-story.pdf
Don’t ever let fucking scientologists know you have any money. Those fucking cunts will surround you like goddamned piranhas and won’t let up until you’re broke. Fucking shitcocks.
This story is really sad. So unnecessary.
Yep.
I hope you guys don’t mind if I interpret the graphs for you too. After that staff work ~ I am so happy I joined staff – finally, I get to use what “I know”. So theta!
BTW – I worked for free for 2.5 years and when I blew after 2.3 years – I had a free loader debt and It cost me $66,543 and 2.5 years of my life. I lost my parents, sister and nieces and nephews because during that time – they were rabidly antago against Scientology. I got them in and they are still in. I am the only one out. I heard from my Uncle however, that they were going to escape soon. I am sending them money.
As a side note, I had to de program at a Recovering Cult Camp for 3 years to get rid of the ideas and beliefs I was hypnotized into believing. Now I am totally “scientology belief free” and pan determined and can use Scientology to explain what Scientology is and what it is not. I also can do it with total certainty.
If you look carefully at the poster, it says Number of (Raw Meat) PUBLIC ROUTED INTO THE ORG. The poster did not state “Raw PublicRouted in and started services”. Very covertly clever those Scientologists, eh?
Translation: The new Portland Ideal ORG had staff go out on the street and lure 105 clueless WOGS into the building.
The patter drill went like this – “Heh, come into this building. We have a huge surprise for you. We are the first religion in the past 75 million years that has PANELS that actually talk to you – you know, so your whole track does not get re stimulated by us Degrading Beings goofing the floof. We live a “stat driven life” so we have to lie, cheat and steal to keep this “Show on the Road”.
(Now the reality is – it is because our leader, David Miscavige, knows that we are a bunch of CS DB’s that can’t do anything right. And we are such robots – we will believe we are DB’s and act accordingly).
It is really kewl. Come on in – we also have a free lunch! (which consists of some stale chips and tap water – but it works as great bait when you are at Wednesday and it is nearing lunch time and you have located a bus load of homeless people who just got released out of the psych ward).
OMG ! What a story you have. I’d live to read a book that you write. Glad you got out. Hope your family makes it out soon. Co$ is so weirdly seductive to the unsuspecting. As I read your share it made me think of a Venus fly trap.
It’s so telling how many people who get declared are actually the one’s who got their families involved. It’s also sad. It’s completely logical because if you’re SP then getting someone into the church must have been a suppressive act since that’s all SPs do. I wonder, how they react if someone just came out said that… Of course, it’s much better to leave them with a simple line like “I know a time will come when you’ll need me, I’ll do my best for you.”
These numbers for Portland org really are like small orgs did in the 1970’s. Thanks to the special correspondent for the picture.
Mike, you dated the article March 16. Groundhog day today?
WordPress gremlin. Fixed.
My main worry was that Scientology like any MLM* type scam would find temporary success by finding new public who hadn’t heard of it. Well, Portland which is welcoming of unusual and non-mainstream ideas isn’t even biting… *maybe GAT3 could be the lost tech of multi-level marketing!!!!!
I make a fabulous living in an extraordinary network marketing company and have for over 10 years. I help people transform their lives. I found the real thing. Even Forbes Magazine has researched the industry and written that this is the industry that is going to save the Baby Boomers – (to their big surprise.). So, I just want to make that distinction so others don’t equate this industry with the mafia-like Co$.
The network marketing industry has the ability to save lives (It did mine.). I don’t want someone to overlook the investigation of it as an option in their lives because of a blanket statement intended as a joke. At the same time I suggest that people actually do intelligent research before they get swept up in any “money games-like imitations.
That being said, the Co$ is is more like getting into a mafia or police state. It is far worse than even the poorest excuse of a Ponzi scheme masquerading as a network marketing company. Forgive me for clarifying this about my profession…I just had to say something.
Amazing that you have their actual stats. Pretty low, I must say. I’m sure the staff are not quite “well paid.” (if they are paid). This is after “massive advertising” including the super bowl, grammy’s and billboards throughout Portland.
My guess is the majority of their GI and auditing hours are from people redoing services, like the Purif and Objectives.
Looks like it’s time to send in the Sea Org.
They can blame all of this on the SP’s – but am pretty sure that doesn’t open the door to much of a handling.
Things are only going to get worse as Going Clear officially debuts in 12 days.
I agree Sheldon, the GI and auditing hours at the Org are probably mostly from old public. New public at class IV Orgs are not only scarce, they are very, very toxic because they already know about OT III and OT VII and LRH, etc… (Which will be even more so, after HBO airing)
When I was working at the AO in Denmark in 1973 I remember a Pre-OT PC who accidentally saw the word “free-wheeling” out of a confidential OT folder and was afraid he was going to die or go crazy because he got “confidential materials” as a grades PC, before he had gotten to the Confidential OT III materials, the Wall of Fire.
With 99% of the new public fully aware that OT III and other OT levels are basically about auditing body thetans and 99% of the old staff and public NOT yet on OT III or above, (and therefore very confident they too will explode and die if they read any confidential materials before they spend a few $100K and 10-20 years to get to OT III)…
Wow, what do you think? This is like mixing fire with gun powder. How can the two groups exist in the same unit of time?? This is a fundamental problem for the growth of Scientology. Unless you can separate these two groups, how the devil will an organization based on secrets survive when there are no secrets? Ruh-roh!
That’s a really good point. I guess they’ll have to make new public sign a confidentiality agreement
that states they have to keep their mouth shut. Course that would drive the new folks away. No real solution here except to declare the wogs before they take their first course. Can’t put this toothpaste back in the tube. Oh well; deny, deny, deny.
Time for someone that needs to do a big amends project to disrupt HBO’s transmission facilities.
Excellent work Mike…A whopping 83 active members. That’s straight up and vertical!! Two years after investing $10 million on a pipe dream, the fancy new building yields a return of less than 100 active members.
Definition of insanity: Trying the same thing over and over (Atlanta, Miami, Kansas City, Columbus, Detroit, Buffalo, Chicago, Toronto, Pittsburgh, Austin, Denver, etc.) and expecting a different result.
Sucks to be COB….
Eighty-three Scientologists! In a city of just over six hundred thousand? yeah. Booming. Riiiiiiight.
83! C’mon now! You forgot to count the body thetans! Sheesh! If you’re going to do it, do it right!
Now I get it.
12 million members =
12 million body threatens
David is right. It all adds up
Now wait a minute! I spent a few years and some serious bucks (goddamit- I hate admitting this but it is the frickin truth) auditing out those frisky little pests. I think it was something like 4 to 6 sessions a day, 365 days a year for at least a few years. So lets just say that I nabbed two or three of those guys each session and lets throw in a few clusters too, and they all headed out into the universe as clears.
That’s at least 50,000 bt’s per member times the 12 million members so add that up!
Yo Dave,
Some of those pesky little bastards ought to be showing up in your Morgues soon. You figure that the 12 to 16 year old new Cee Ogre members ought to be showing up clear real soon. How exactly do you test for that Dave. Do you just ask them straight up “Who were you stuck to last lifetime?”
A) “Well I was one of those CICSMFAH that was stuck to that frickin SP named Newcomer and that was a real bitch goddamnit. So I am here now to make it all right by you Dave………do you want me to SCOHB or what good buddy? As you can see, I have disconnected from that loser …… thanks to you and all your wonderful tech.”
Dave) “Well I have bad news for you. That asshole did not do his bridge standardly with the new GAT II tech so you are going to have to get your ass stuck back onto his body and get him to see the IJC.”
Now you’re cooking with gas, dan! I knew you’d catch on! But, keep in mind that I believe every man, woman and child on Teegeeack has between 2000 & 3,000 (more if you’re super rich) body thetans attached to their bodies. The numbers add up quickly!
Well, check this out, guys. In 1978 or 79, the COSMOD Mission (Church of Scientology, Missions of Davis) in Portland would have big weeks of $35,000 in 1970’s money. Minimum wage was $1.25 an hour, for example. I’d say about $20,000 to $25,000 were average, good weeks for the mission at that time.
Some staff were getting paid $50 to $150 a week. I’m not sure what the auditors were getting paid. But that was enough to rent a room with a couple of staff and eat alright, at that time.
And that’s all Portland is making now? Pffft.
Here is the inflation rate between 1978 and now.
$35,000 of 1978 dollars would be worth: $127,272.73 in 2014
$35,000 of 2014 dollars would be worth $9,625.00 in 1978
$100 of 1978 dollars would be worth: $363.64 in 2014
$100 of 2014 dollars would be worth $27.50 in 1978
Someone should show this to the Portland Org ED and Treas Sec. Maybe they, being old timers, are stuck on the time track where $35,000 was a big week. Might open the door to a handling, once they see why they aren’t being able to pay their light bill AND their staff.
What about it, Mark Stanley?
The Ideal Org here in Sacramento is very very empty. What is the latest news on the Santa Barbara Ideal Org?
This just in to the Weekend Update news desk: Santa Barbara org is still dead.
That’s good news.
Just like Generalissimo Francisco Franco, LOL!
You got the reference!
I spent many years working abroad, most of the time in the Middle East. When on holiday here in California, my sister and her fellow Scientoloists , in Santa Barbara, would tell me that the Arabs were crazy. I did not have the heart to tell these Scientologists the truth. They would not have accepted the truth anyway.
Did they try CPR to revive the Santa Barbara org? If not, are all the staff now part of the walking dead? I mean, being a zombie isn’t all bad…is it? Well, I guess a zombie auditor might try to bite his/her PC. But, hey, shit happens!
This is wonderful news to me about the org in Santa Barbara and I will make sure Basketball Jane knows it I jus. t moved to Ojai and besides buying the Larry Hagman estate to turn into an Alanon Celeb Center, the $cilons now have opened an office right off Main Street and I hear a rumor that I will be checking out that the SHED gym directly across from the famous 12 step club on El Roblar is Scientology owned. I looked at all the books behind the desk at the gym and didn’t see any Hubbard trash at first examination but if he’s a $cilon, after March 29th, he won’t want anyone to know it. Just so you know, the Ventura mission has moved twice from its former location, first to Telegraph, and now behind the $3 theatre next to Chick Filet. My business partner/friend is the main volunteer there as well as the primary funder. She only came here because of me. I feel like I brought evil to Ventura because they had virtually no presence until she came and they started draining her substantial bank account. She is about to be heart broken when I’m declared SP as a never-in as she still seeks to convert me and get me in.somehow and she did not sell false stock as our OT5 partner did.. The church swindled me of enough. The next Scientologist that comes near me I will tell to get away or I will call the police. I think they are ISIS without physical weapons and should be avoided at all costs. I have heard that from several people in Ojai and on March 30th the tidal wave begins to swallow Miscavige once and for all.
Mike! That is so funny. I just googled that last night. For those too young to know (or who weren’t Saturday Night Live fans) here’s what Mike was referring to. I added the hard of hearing part because, well, some of the “still-ins” can’t hear very well, apparently. Plus, it was funny.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=butZyxI-PRs
Thanks for the update on Sacramento, Dan. I’ve been very curious about that org. I have some ex-friend staff auditors there. I heard they were getting paid and taking vacations and doing so great. I thought when I heard it it was a lie, but you never know. I thought that maybe there was one org out there that was actually viable.
McCarran,
A mutual friend and I took a stroll past the Sac Morgue after returning from the Going Clear Documentary last Friday evening. Course was out and students were leaving …… all five of them.
Now given that I don’t know the time for Friday graduation and all, it could be that the hundreds on course had already left the building. Of the five I saw, one was an OT VIII and I think his wife was with him, also an OT VIII.
I know that my (ex) son used to work at the Org (2.5 yr contract for the Ideal Morgue opening) but he is currently not on staff and not on lines. I suppose he might be banned from courses and auditing because he has a mouthy loser dad who is declared …… just sayin …. that may be a why. Otherwise, he might be waking up. Hope so, we’ll see how all this goes.
It’s empty. Like a haunted house. Full of ghosts
Good morning Mike. I enjoy your blog.