A quick report from a Special Correspondent in the home of the “ideal” New York org (and of course the invisible CCNY and the imaginary Harlem ideal org, and the non existent Missions). This is where the infamous “stress test” began — pushed into a fad by Angie Blankenship when she and Jenny Linson were sent by Miscavige to “expand the org” so the ideal building could open — 10 years ago now. And yes, he spoke to them on the phone AT LEAST ONCE EVERY DAY and sent them long, rambling written orders every day too. Warren McShane and Allen Cartwright perjurious deposition testimony notwithstanding.
Pretty sorry state of affairs. And these criminals are not using a Warehouse 8, so of course they are 50,000X less effective than they otherwise would be….
I guess the ideal org cannot afford the latest in technical advances to ensure they are delivering “standard tech.” They probably got these 4 meters as hand-me-downs when Rich and Karen Beatty bought their 2 Warehouse 8’s (each).
Here is the report:
Mike I took these this weekend in NYC (last weekend now). I have video of my wife, whose face is off camera doing the test. This guy was awful and that is no joke. He had her read a card and then tried immediately to sell her a DVD. All in about 3 minutes.
They had two tables with four E-meters and only one guy.
Are not these E-meters the useless outdated garbage? Can’t the ORG afford to get the best up to date once, would that not be a selling point or at least a talking point to engage the public over? Are these things not cleaned between uses? To tell the truth, they looked disgusting and I am sure hundreds of hands have touched them.
I also found it odd, he never said we can help you but instead “get this DVD”. At one point he was no longer reading the meter, but asking Ruin Questions face to face.
On a weekend, sunny, nice day in one of the busiest cities in the world, Scientology had one guy with outdated equipment by himself doing a really poor job.
PS, the guy in yellow is not a VM, but a guy selling bus tickets for tours of the city.
A couple years ago, we were using even older meters – any meter we could get our hands on. And the way it’s trained, you don’t even really use the meter; it’s mainly just a prop – you just pretend as the needle moves. You ask a question, if the needle moves anywhere you say “that! What was that thought?” The person will say “nothing,” then you just start talking with them to get their ruin.
And when they wouldn’t buy the book, you inevitably say as they walk away,”oh, I guess their confront just isn’t up enough.”
Apparently, Dianetics used to fly off the shelves in the 50’s. Not in my generation.
Also, where’s the marketing campaign when it comes to the book cover? Tremendously outdated and the photo has nothing to do with “personal enhancement.” No button whatsoever to catch a buyer’s eye.
Anon,
A short time ago on this blog Mike (our Mike) explained to me that DM cut all funding for the DMSMH book ads as well as declared all the marketing people who used to create these ads, and never replaced them.
I think that’s very sad. I really do. For, despite all the MUs I got reading it, despite all my scepticism, my failed help buttons – all kinds of stuff I had going on back then – despite the big gaps in my understanding of it, something resonated in me, something communicated, and I walked myself into an org shortly after reading it, to find out more. So what LRH said about books bringing people into orgs was true in my case. I was a “one out of 25”. And I really do think its a damned shame that its not being promoted – not because its killing the RCS – that’s the silver lining in this dark cloud – but because it did put me on the path to handling some things which I had thought were hopelessly unsolvable. And what worked for me in Dianetics and Scientology worked only because it was not forced upon me. Its very sad the way the Bridge is forced on pulbic now. It just can’t ever work that way. But I digress.
You’re so right Aquamarine.
If the RCS didn’t have such terrible PR, its millions could be spent on book ads for LRH’s works so that they could be sold in bookstores, drug stores, every place. Why must this bookselling cycle be so damned significant?
Back in the 80s I was in a rush to get somewhere and some guy had a little Dianetics bookstand set up in a busy area. Walking by, I gave it a quick, curious glance and the guy picked up on this and smiled at me and said, “Read this, its a great book!” No hard sell; I could have ignored him but instead, hardly breaking stride I asked, “How much?” “$3.50!”, he said, to which I dug out the money and stuffed it into his hand and took the book and walked quickly on. I didn’t think much of it. It was a book. I liked to read, I read all kinds of stuff so I bought a book. Big deal, right? Well, reading DMSMH did change my life. But the cycle of buying it? No big deal at all. Am I so different from everyone else? I would buy a book today, for the same reasons; I like to read, I’m curious about things, its easy, its cheap – why not? Its only a BOOK, for Christ’s sake! There have to be millions of others like me, who have this viewpoint about books. I would think,and if the church’s PR were not so rotten it would be a breeze to sell DMSMH to public like me, who love to read and who are willing to read just about anything!
And, while we’re on the subject, let me get another book-beef off of my chest. When the Basics came out and Dianetics jumped in price from $8.00 to $20 I was told by staff that inexpensive paperback books are not valued by people, that only higher priced books are considered worth reading. I’m paraphrasing but that was the gist. A book had to look right and cost money or it would be considered a cheap paperback not worth reading. Wow, did this NOT indicate to me, or what? Talk about your specious reasoning, my God!
Forgive me, people, but I just want to make something clear: It is a serious Div 6 outpoint to make the buying of the DMSMH book an act of HUGE significance (“This book will change your life”…”Dianetics will TOTALLY handle that (major ruin of your life, no money, no 2D, grief over death of loved ones, etc. etc.), just read it, buy it NOW”, etc. etc. Even if the PR weren’t rotten, even if it were excellent, it would STILL be a big mistake to sell DMSMH this way, because it is a LIE.
READING Dianetics does NOT necessarily handle ANYTHING. What reading it DOES do, or, I should say, what it did for ME, was open a window that certain things that were bothering me – (ok, ok, RUINING me) COULD get handled. It opened my reach, was what it did for me. Now, that’s a BIG difference between promising someone that reading a book WILL handle. The current stress test patter, i.e., that READING it WILL handle, etc., etc., is deceptive of raw public. Its an attempt to overwhelm, and a big overt. I always hated saying this crap to people. It was just so unreal for me.
OK, I’m done now, thank you 🙂
That staff member looks stressed out himself in this photo. Probably ’cause he is using the wrong e-meter, OFF WITH HIS HEAD!
And speaking of Ms. Karen Beatty is she still the ED of NY day? With her millions can’t she donate a ‘new’ meter? Oh, gees, what a stupid question. No, Ms. Prima Donna has to be the FIRST and ONLY one to have the BEST. Not surprised she’s still ‘in’ cause she NEVER got the tech. For anyone who doesn’t know Ms. Karen, she’s just one of those Bitches who married a trust fund baby and walks around like her shit don’t stink and has never showed an ounce of ARC towards anyone (at least not in my presence). But really, if it weren’t for Rich (a nice guy) she’d be flippin burgers at some gin joint. Just sayin, I’ll be quiet now.
You must watch this Australian (?) spoof of the stress test. The Gullibility Test:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IQQE04_TCM
Funny film. And at least the woman from the Church did not react to the spoof and actually seemed a little amused by it.
Compare that to calling all Scilons to “swarm! swarm!” and shut the guy up and hound him off the street while demanding to know what his crimes are!
In fact, if Scientology would just lighten up and be more like that woman in the film they would have a lot better luck with people. Having the humility to accept being lampooned is somewhat admirable and could even lead to learning and reform. The other option — going rabid mad dog about the evil psychs and the SPs — well, not so effective.
I know it caught them totally off-guard, and they were not only unprepared to retaliate, they were well aware that they would be on a widely viewed TV show.
But you’re right. Why so serious? Why so defensive?
so well made and written! what a laugh riot!
The yellow jacket guy is probably quite savvy – he’s figured the stress test customers, after being crush-sold, made to feel stupid, and dirty, offers a fantastic tour of NYC by way of light relief.
In Bromley, south west London, the Wakleys would often corral a few reluctant volunteers – myself included once or twice – to do stress tests there on a Saturday morning. Although it did result in some book sales, the number of verifiable public arriving on service at London Org was about nil. I think Nick was on a never-ending amends project as some one who had arguably the most colorful ethics history in the UK. Since Anonymous appeared these have all but disappeared now anyway.
So, this shows the real ‘ideal’ scene of the poor show of what Black Heart calls the strategy of the universe. As usual no products, wrong whys, stat push and zero results. On this he is definitely straight up and vertical.
Probably 30 years ago in a mall in Lafayette Louisiana, there was a Stress Test table outside a movie theater when I was coming out. I got the “Amway/Herbalife warning vibe even then, long before I learned about Scientology. But I remember that they were giving away Battlefield Earth, and that I didn’t get very far into it before it went to a used bookstore. (It was probably 1982, now that I’ve checked and learned that that’s when it came out…probably they had cases and cases to dispose of after buying them to make sure it went up the sales chart.)
I’d say I had a close call, but i was in no danger…my mom was a …psych! She’d have steered me away, filthy SP that she was 😉
Hey, at least the witches are upfront about their beliefs and often have candles and some nice celtic jewellery to sell. Considering they out number scientologists 22 to 1 here in England churchies should be grateful they’re even allowed at these gigs.
Laughter!
Dear Scientologist – if you will just donate $500 or more to the new Ideal Stress Test Set-up to provide Ultra Meters, we can flood public by the tens of thousands into the org and clear New York by this time next year. Much much much love and wet kisses – John Carmichael
The Warlock reworked div 6 to mean the Department of Q and A. He established a totally squirrel div 6 where you get a guy in and you sit in him down to Q and A with a television monitor.
He has the div 2 public in continuous Q and A trying to figure out where / who they are and running back DOWN the bridge. That IS Q and A!
He shut down the missions declared Hubbard an overt product maker sabotaged the div 6 network ARC broke the field cancelled certs planet wide and set the Church up on a begging plan to survive. Spent years generating P.R. flaps and law suits that he keeps in pending baskets, PAYS to keep in pending baskets.
This is a full blown S.P.. HIM! Not US!
Really David, which one of us couldn’t have been just as suppressive if we wanted to? I am not even impressed with your suppressiveness. It wasn’t even a challenge for you with the set up you rolled in to. Just a few false reports and a lot of comm line cutting and bullying.
You are basically a common trick not even really artful at ceremonial magic.
Most people aren;t even leaving the Church because they are mad. You have just BORED them to death!
The more you try to puff yourself up the smaller you get against the back drop of your own create. Laughter!
You have gone effect of the magic. The only honor you have had this week is my referring to you as The Warlock. I upgraded you from Pimp to Warlock.
Because you are into the game of thrones. Alhhh but you have no heirs, only copies and slaves. You own the clone throne. That’s your place.
Dave’s big plans all seem to say
‘May you always be my prey.’
Watch your golden age decay
As they haul your ass away!
Chairman of the Boring
Audience is snoring
When you die like Goering
There will be no mourning
Laughter! 2FF!
All the way to the reactive bank.
Laughter!
I always thought these “stress tests” were a real stupid idea conceived by a moron.
Now you tell me that Dave was the one behind this BS.
All I can say is…..
It figures.
What happened to selling ’em DMSMH or getting ’em to do a personality test?
Don’t know of any other way of using an e-meter to disseminate other than auditing the person.
Otherwise it’s just a pointless waste of time.
So it responds when someone thinks of something.
Polygraphs, Encephalographs,Galvanometers even Voltmeters basically do the same thing.
So what?
It’s the person using the device who makes a difference.
Lord have mercy. More progress body routing. This was not a bright idea. I mean, it is not a bad idea to reach out and be there to hob knob with the curious. That is good. But why is this guy sitting on the street where people can cross the street and fly about? He does not own the street and it is not a way to run some control and the area itself is noisy with distraction. And why is he selling DVD’s?
It has gone from body routing the person in (not that those OCA tests were very magical in my opinion) but you could get the person in a close space with you and give them your undivided attention. Have a more personal conversation with them in the org or mission and they could see what was there instead of dubbing in what might be there from a street corner.
And the idea was to sign the person up right there. For SERVICE and have them start, not send the home with a DVD to Q and A.
Who dreams these things up? AAAAaaah, people who have never worked on the streets, people who have never worked in div 6, people who have never worked in an Org or Mission. People who have never worked with PUBLIC!
But it’s a go and you know why? Because it was a Sea Org Member who ordered it.
Basically what this guy is doing, is sitting on the street Q and A ing with people. Well that’s alright if the purpose of div 6 is to Q and A.
Isn’t that exactly what David Miscavige does at every event? He gets people to sit down and go into some kind of Q and A.
Lord have mercy this is pitiful.
He spends a bloody FORTUNE of the Church’s money earned by HARD WORKING SINCERE people for props make up a videos. The public get houded to show up to clap for him. He packs the place as best he can and then FUCKS with head!
They leave in one biog fucking Q and A!
“Am I trained, or not trained?”
“Am I the blind leading or the blind following?”
“Are movie stars really the most valuable?”
“Did I just find out my certs are cancelled?”
“Did I just get ordered to do a retrain?”
“Did he just tell all of us we are overt products?”
“Did he just say Hubbard was an overt product maker?”
“What does this mean for me?”
“Does this mean my whole auditing is all fucked up because of miscalled FN’s?”
Etc, etc etc etc.
And while they leave the event in a fog of Q and A and mystery, they are hit by the staff to BUY BUY BUY the latest that will bring them right of it!
That little mind fucking warlock. He isn’t qualified for the RPF!
A veritable doomsday machine parading as a droid.
So true TO – that is exactly the Q and A that he has created. That is precisely what leads members to start questioning it all. He is on a mission of self destruction. You are right – he does not qualify for the RPF – that would imply some hope for the guy.
They should have just posted the DVD for free on YouTube. That would have been progressive. But that would mean their goal would be to help people and clear the planet. Apparently they care about something else.
Seeing these pictures with the old meters reminded me of one of Karen’s videos where she said David Miscavige studied the franchising model of McDonald’s to get his idea for ideal orgs. First, let’s imagine for one second that the Mark VIII isn’t some overpriced POS that’s been gathering dust on a shelf for nearly a decade. Now imagine that McDonald’s discovered a new, secret and exclusive blend of coffee it could use in its fight to win business from Starbucks. HQ believes it will be the best coffee they’ve ever sold and they get all of their regional managers excited. It sends out advertising materials to every one of its stores and tells them to hype the hell out of it but….they don’t send the new coffee. Does that sound like a good business? Of course not. That would be ridiculous. But that’s what’s happening here. With the Super Bowl ad, I’m sure many people have seen the new meter whether they’ve wanted to or not. It’s been advertised. So why doesn’t the billion dollar Co$ provide units for the orgs so curious onlookers might try it out?
Oh well. By the way, I didn’t see any Purell or sanitizing wipes in those pics. Why would anyone touch those meters? As you say, who knows how many hands have touched that thing? The idea that someone else’s sweat might wind up on my hands, well, that might stress me out a bit 😛
Back when there was a lot more Org public, I thought that Div 6 struggled because they would usually put the weakest/newest staff members into Div 6 positions. From this write up it sounds like that has continued and then with the VFP being changed to getting them to watch the Miscavige DVD… Div 6 has dived from bad to worse.
But this is *not* a new staff member! He has been doing book sales for many years, and when I left at the end of 2011, he was in fact running the raw book sales for NY Fdn. They used to have teams going out every day, mostly made up of commandeered staff members but also including some public. Looks like they don’t have enough staff anymore who can be spared from their posts, and certainly no public volunteers. It’s just Jimmy, on his own to keep the stats up, so he has to cut straight to DVD sales (easier than that big book) and to heck with finding a ruin. Lo, how the mighty NY Stress Test is fallen.
That’s interesting that he’s what passes for a seasoned veteran these days… funny how Miscavige goes on and on about how they’ve conquered KSW. This is the correct Technology for expanding Scientology?
I can believe this. They relied on volunteers. FSMs. BSOs and PES’ were desperate and stuck with the job unless they had volunteers. I was one of them once for a short while. I never did stress tests, just sold the books.
At one point the NY Org Senior C/S, Debbie Indursky, was made to go out daily to a table in front of the org there, like in the photo except the table was against the building wall, and do pinch tests ( but called a stress test ) on willing people as they walked by. The word ‘stress’ was used in the patter but i don’t recall if she used a sign. this may be the time frame Mike refers to about orders going in to get this done. Previous to this is was unheard of to see the C/S doing anything but being in the Ivory Tower.
Debbie was the only available meter trained staff member they could send out, who could leave their post to do this. There was usually someone there to tag the sale of a book or course start with her… she really didn’t know how to sell. They got many people in this way. This was back in the late 80’s or early 90s before the Ideal org was created from the run down building the org occupy. That location has always been dead, despite some efforts and a fancy renovation.
you know in down times……which is going on two decades now IMO……… something like their “stress test” should be a brisk if not a booming success……as it no doubt was in the increasingly distant past.
there are a LOT of stressed out people but they walk on by because they’re hip to it in one way or another, they already have a “reality” on the matter in some form that is likely not a positive one.
as a never in, i bet i could walk up to one of those tables and know more about the subject, what questions he’s asking and why, better than he does himself.
the march of time has not been kind to scientology. in short, in it’s present form, it is a relic of the 20th century gasping it’s last breaths. it doesn’t fit into a 21st century society.
many years ago the catholic church was vastly different than today, back then THAT was the church, today THAT church no longer exists, though a similar church now exists in it’s place.
if scientology is to continue into the 21st century, it will be in name only, the status quo has no future.
the fish are much more educated these days, the same old bait is not going to work like it used to.
someone should stand down the block from one of those tables and survey people who’ve walked by it and ask what, if any, thoughts they had about it? and see what kind of answers you get.
Survey the public? Are you out of your friggin’ mind?! Where is that written in any MCOB?
I would only survey them that walked by if you can handle hearing an aweful lot of expletives
One of their problems is that the COS exist to spread the word of Hubbard, through his books. Counting “books sold” as an important stat shows that in many ways the COS is a worst case scenario version of an intrusive book club. The problem is book clubs worked fairly well back in the 70s, 80s and 90s, but the Internet has pulled the rug from under their feet. Not many people today are going to hear they need a self help book and then sign up for a book club at at street corner. Video killed the radio star, and now the Internet is killing book club cults.
“…. COS is a worst case scenario version of an intrusive book club. The problem is book clubs worked fairly well back in the 70s, 80s and 90s, but the Internet has pulled the rug from under their feet. Not many people today are going to hear they need a self help book and then sign up for a book club at at street corner. Video killed the radio star, and now the Internet is killing book club cults.”
That’s an interesting comment.
$cientology to use a track & field analogy, has been “lapped” by technology. And they’re falling even further behind. Basically $cn. is a dinosaur who will not adapt.
Is this at CCNY – what street is this?
Times Square
But they ain’t square enough to take the test.
Thank you. It almost looks like a movie set of what a Scientology table would look like on Times Square, instead of the real deal. Must have passed by this a million times without noticing.
Good to see that those stress test tables are totally useless. I tried selling books about 10 years ago and it was a total waste of time. I would work for 10 hours a day and never sell one book. I did it as a volunteer and really tried hard to sell books – the world is HIP to Scientology and Dianetic’s and they ain’t buying it!
Scientology is DEAD!
The various orgnaizations that put on fairs etc won’t let Scientology into any venues so they have to go to witch fairs and snake oil conventions. LOL
I love Mark Bunkers clip from “Knowledge Report” where he does a stress test for real.
When the Scientologist asks him “what is ruining his life” – he says, ” the leader of his religion or group is beating and slapping people; they call him SLAPPY and then asks “Can Dianetic’s HELP SLAPPY?” and the Scientologists says – “YES – Dianetic’s can help”!!
It was hysterical.
🙂 Too much!
i haven’t seen that but i lol just reading it.
God this brings back memories. So many similar things happened in South Africa with these book-a-thons and “stress test” set-ups. The public often mistake these stands are free “blood pressure” tests, and have NO idea what they are about to get into.
At one point booksellers were resorting to selling really cheap-junk black and white news-print booklets from the VMH Handbook for R10 a piece (that’s less than $1) – and claiming it in the stats as a “book sold”. So MANY of the stats being reported were not even DMSMH books. I really pity the few staff and public that are still being forced to go out on these book-a-thons – it must be gruelling for them. Of course the word “Scientology” is not mentioned or displayed anywhere.
I was sent on a number of occasions to secure bookstands in shopping malls, and was very heavily drilled on not breathing a word about “Scientology” but instead saying we were from “Bridge Publications” – selling self-help books. We were even told to avoid using the word Dianetics if at all possible.
Kind of hard to sell anything when you’re on a continuous withhold.
Yes, I always felt witholdy when selling books.Not about the tech itself, but about the organization, the church. It was so uncomfortable. I’m so glad I don’t have to do that anymore, and I resent the time I wasted doing this – more, even, than the money I threw away to the Ideal Morgues and the IAS (which wasn’t peanuts, by the way). Funny, what really pisses me off are the afternoons I wasted doing this. And going to events. I figure this way: money you can get back, but wasted time? That’s gone.
It’s a learning experience. All grist for the mill.
“The public often mistake these stands are free “blood pressure” tests, and have NO idea what they are about to get into.”
They will sure as hell need a blood pressure test before they get out of it!
Yes!! Same at our org in the states, too. Oh boy, I had forgotten about the VM booklets. You would sell one of those cheap booklets and get a book sold stat!!! (A booklet that any other church would give away for free out of genuine concern for the person’s improvement).
On the street promoting stress, he’ll take your MEST though it’s just a test.
They’ll take your MEST, though just a test, with all your money left behind,
Then they’ll ask for more and take your soul, but they think they’re being kind.
A cult is a cult and that is very true, but a cult like this one will leave you broke and blue.
So know yourself and you’ll be fine, walking down that long thin line. The joy of being out is good! Celebrate like I know you should.
With apologies to MJ.
Apology accepted Surfer Dude. You inspired me with song –
Give my regards to Broadway
Forget about the stress test there
Tell all the folks ’round Forty-Second Street
Don’t be caught unaware
Whisper of how I’m yearning
To warn each woman, child and man
Give my regards to old Broadway
And tell them it’s just a scam!