Weekly Saturday feature from Terra Cognita
The Illusion of Self-determinism in Scientology
Self-determinism is a highly touted state of being in Scientology. Being self-determined is a goal of every Scientologist. “Other-determinedness”: not good. Deciding for oneself: good.
“Self-determinism is that state of being wherein the individual can or cannot be controlled by his environment according to his own choice. In that state the individual has self-confidence in his control of the material universe and the organisms within it along every dynamic. He is confident about any and all abilities or talents he may possess. He is confident in his interpersonal relationships. He reasons but does not need to react.” L. Ron Hubbard, Advanced Procedures and Axioms.
If self-determinism is good, pan-determinism is even better. Someone who is pan-determined is in control of not only his own life, but of all those in his universe. He has “the ability to regulate the considerations of two or more identities, whether or not opposed.” LRH, Creation of Human Ability. A pan-determined person takes full responsibility for both sides of the game.
I’m not sure how things would work if everyone were pan-determined and everybody was responsible for everything. I suspect a lot of overlap and cross purposes might muck-up the works.
There is nothing wrong with being self-determined. Self-determinism is good. Deciding to play the guitar is great. Achieving that goal is wonderful. Reaching one’s dream of becoming a teacher is fantastic.
The First Time is Always the Best
New people to Scientology frequently experience initial surges in self-determinism after receiving auditing or completing a basic course. Life Repair can be a godsend for what’s ruining a person’s life. The Communications Course can be life-changing. These early services also act as dangling carrots. The promise of greater self-determinism and being fully in control of one’s life is often what leads a person up the Bridge.
All too soon, this boost in self-determinism crawls to a stop. Whereas one used to decide things for himself, LRH and DM now provide all the tools on how he is to live his life.
From ethics, conditions, and PTS tech, to what to read and how to study, Scientology doctrine replaces a person’s need to think and reason. Other religions, practices, and schools of thought become superfluous. Most are based on lies and formed on cracked foundations anyway. Many are suppressive. All are forbidden.
Penn and Teller
Self-determinism in cults is an illusion. Members do rid themselves of unwanted conditions; they do have gains. More often than not though, these wins come at the expense of personal freedom. And self-determinism. Every step in the direction of self-sufficiency and independence comes with a price tag.
For every proffered freedom, cult members must comply with strict rules and regulations. Severe penalties loom large for all those who step outside these narrowly defined boundaries. The Church of Scientology is no different.
Scientologists are required to believe in L. Ron Hubbard and its present leader, David Miscavige, without question. Everything LRH ever muttered is considered one hundred percent true and workable. Every new program DM marches out is genius and considered that which will save the church.
Scientologists are only allowed to communicate with people deemed acceptable per LRH doctrine.
Continually threatening Scientologists with trips to ethics, disconnection from loved ones, and never going free are favorite tools of control. Members must regularly surrender themselves to an unsympathetic and callous system of security checking, conditions, and penalties (enforced by kids still wet-behind-the-ears).
Scientologists are taught to fear the outside world.
Scientologists avoid critical thinking to the extent that not recognizing truth and reality from the absurd is routine.
Truth and Irony
The irony is, Scientologists—like all cult members—are some of the least self-determined people walking the planet.
Their entire world is regulated by the church. What and how they study is controlled by their supervisors. Their “route to freedom” is governed by their C/S and auditor. With whom they associate is regulated by their ethics officer. Questions of right and wrong, good versus evil, and one’s “condition” in life is determined by the MAA. Life’s greatest questions have all been answered by LRH. David Miscavige precisely uses this tech and policy to boom Scientology and clear the planet.
Cult members’ lives are largely determined by their fears: their fear of never handling their ruin; their fear of getting sent to ethics; their fear of disconnection from family and friends; their fear of not going OT; their fear that Scientology is their last chance and if they don’t go free this lifetime, they’ll be condemned to an eternity of wandering a cold, unforgiving universe.
Bro’s
Just like North Korea, Scientology is a full-blown dictatorship. There are no boards of directors, governors, or advisors. There are no regents or watchdog committees. There are no independent branches of review. Checks and balances are for democracies.
There is no room for dissention, much less discussion in the Church of Scientology. Innovation, originality, invention, and self-determinism have no place on a Scientology Org Board.
Besides using the same hair salon, Kim Jong-un and David Miscavige rule their kingdoms with iron fists. Any word but theirs is not tolerated. It’s their way or the highway.
Just like in North Korea, self-determinism in Scientology is a foreign concept.
Staff
Staff members are the least self-determined of all Scientologists. Sea Org members are the least of the least. Their lives are strictly regimented and controlled. Step out of line, and it’s to the RPF.
It’s hard to be self-determined in today’s society when you have no time or money. For impoverished SO members, leaving is especially hard.
Life isn’t as bleak for the public as it is for the staff. But just barely. As a person falls further and further into debt, so too does he become less and less self-determined. He becomes more and more a slave to his job, his mortgage, credit card companies, collection agencies, and the tax man. Scientology perpetuates this condition by repeatedly persuading people to “donate” beyond their means. Which incidentally, is completely off-policy per LRH.
A common refrain from Regs and DofP’s is that this person will make back the money ten-fold after completing their next level. When pigs fly.
Eyes Wide Shut
A person becomes self-determined when he opens his eyes and finally decides what’s really true for himself. And what is not. He becomes truly free the moment he walks out of the church for the final time.
LRH famously wrote in Personal Integrity, “What is true for you is what you have observed yourself. And when you lose that, you have lost everything.”
In Scientology, what is true for you is what LRH and David Miscavige say is true. Period. No room for discussion, debate, or other opinion.
Determining for oneself the truth of Scientology tech or policy is antipathetic to the ideals and survival of the church.
Last Words
LRH wrote, “Self-determinism is that state of being wherein the individual can or cannot be controlled by his environment according to his own choice.”
In Scientology there is only one choice: be controlled by Scientology. Personal observation, judgement, evaluation, and resolve are secondary considerations.
Still not Declared,
Terra Cognita
Jonathan Mark. That’s my question also…what is MAA??
Cognita mentions being subservient to “MAA.” What is “MAA”?
Master at Arms (Ethics Officer)
Master-at-Arms I believe is the term they use, a relatively senior manager in the pseudo-naval hierarchy of the sea org at a local church or Org. Someone can correct me if I’m wrong.
Yes, is Ethics Officer but in the Sea Org.
Self Determination; the Scientology real definition:
Just nix the word self. The real meaning is Ron determined.
Ron establishes a learning environment whereby common people redefine their value system to have the values that L Ron Hubbard implants through study and Altitude Instruction. The self dynamic is redifined.
How many Scientologists were told by reges, that their desire to accomplish something other than buying Scientology was surviving only on the first (self) dynamic.
In Scientology, the dynamic of self is twisted and distorted. Self, in Scientology is denied, crushed and redifined.
All determination in Scientology from self to pan is regimented into the narrow confines of promoting Scientology.
The genius of Ron was convincing us that our self determination is selfish and Ron determination will save the universe.
I believe it can be said that all of this manipulation of human values, that Ron created in Scientology, had two real motives:
1) the acquisition of tax free money
2) personal power for Ron
Scientology was created by these two Ron self determined desires and motives.
The save the universe angle, was Ron using the human value of helping others to amass a fortune for himself alone.
It was always always about the money; our money.
“In Scientology, the dynamic of self is twisted and distorted. Self, in Scientology is denied, crushed and redefined.”
Dianetics and Scientology were promoted to me as SELF help. The TV commercials for Dianetics were about curing SELF of fears and doubts and impediments that we’re holding one back from achieving THEIR goals and dreams in life. Turns out that was the hook to bait the SELF.
After some initial wins, and feeling better about myself, self-determinism was then used against me by the reges. I was told I was being selfish-determined. Since there were 8 dynamics, I was fighting a losing battle by being focused on the 1st dynamic-the self dynamic. I needed to be pan-determined. I needed to be focused on the group(scientology) and contributing to clearing the planet.
In other words, I needed to stop being myself and become a scientologist.
“In other words, I needed to stop being myself and become a scientologist.”
I just threw up a little in my mouth. Not really, but I think we all did that. I think all. Maybe there are a bunch who did not give up themselves to become cultified.
Scientology plays a good language game. It sounds right, intelligent and spiritual.
It claims the moral high ground then uses the trust it has established to destroy self determination.
I think the word for that is deception.
🙂
Self-determined: Deciding for yourself that what scn determined for you is right. Anything else is other-determined.
Or what *they* believe he said that was “true” for them. Back before the mission theft, I worked in a mission which used no policy books. Didn’t have any in-house. When asked why not, the mission holder said simply: If I use senior policy, I don’t need the rest. Senior policy is “we always deliver what we promise.” And that’s the way the mission worked.
I distrust Hubbard definition of self determinism, sounds like he is describing a rebel a renegade.
The key points in the post mirror my own experience. Gains on Life Repair and
Communication followed by Hubbard’s distorted view of reality.
IMO, Scientology takes dysfunction and makes it more dysfunctional.
I saw this pattern in my own march up the “bridge”.
We are always free to do the right thing. I don’t think self-determinism has any relevance beyond that objective. Hubbard’s discussing it as an aim unto itself demonstrated his intellectual and moral depravity in my opinion.
If doing the right thing isn’t the motive behind our self-determination then what difference does it make whether we are furthering our own mischief or ‘other-determined’ mischief?
Great article. Yup, that is the way it is.
HEIL MISCAVIAGE!
It seems to me that the phenomenon of achieving initial wins, and possibly dining out on those for a long time while pursuing something that becomes less and less rewarding is fairly common.
First off, a person making a life change, such as becoming involved with an organization that promises “wins,” usually does so from a place of need, or deftly marketed-to “ruin.” For example, a person is unhappy about their health, their spiritual condition, their loneliness, their dead-end job, etc.
So they take action: They sign up at a dating site, order gym equipment, test drive a local church or other spiritually minded organization/support group, hire a job advancement coach, order a few get-rich-quick schemes or even start dabbling in some form of recreational drugs. Invariably, they will feel a sense of relief, of having taken control over what ails them–a sense of increased “self-determination.” It’s fair to say that along with this comes a certain experience of euphoria, a vision that THIS–however beneficial, neutral, harmful or simply futile as it may be–will lead to a better life and will do so indefinitely. Call it the honeymoon, the pink cloud, the placebo effect, or even “self-determination.”
And some real “wins” may even occur as a few pounds of water weight melt away, a new resume is written, visions of an internet marketing empire or the initial joys of “getting high” are enjoyed,a couple of dates are set, etc. These effects will occur whether the newfound remedy is beneficial, neutral or even harmful. Still, a person may feel that they are on a better and more productive path. Having made an investment of time, money and hope will convince them even further that they are on to something and will harden their denial of all evidence to the contrary.
This makes for an “ideal scene” for anything fraudulent and predatory whether it’s a miracle health cure, a get-rich fraud or a cult taking over a person’s life and their real self-determination. In this respect, scientology is not at all unique, just a lot more ruthless in using the initial euphoria as a means to bleed its adherents in every aspect of their lives.
Thanks, TC, for an interesting and thought stimulating piece. And thanks to MR for providing the platform.
Agree about the initial wins causing one to continue on with something that becomes less and less rewarding. States my experience.
I left before my wins ran out. Haven’t regretted that ever!
Seeking wins, I think, is a good part of what life is all about. Choosing the good ones is the challenge. Often, we are incorrect. The earlier one can spot the errors is a measure of gained self wisdom.
Todd Cray, your comment was interesting and thought provoking, as well. Thank you for sharing that.
Todd, thanks for this thoughtful and insightful piece. You get to a particularly interesting point about an external factor that may provide much of the sense of benefit experienced by people doing Dianetics and Scientology – “taking action.” Scientology itself goes to lengths about the power of intention, but may not want to acknowledger how much that itself, along with placebo effects, are responsible for the results attributed to processing and training.
The interesting question raised, is would someone who committed themselves to some Scientology work, experience much the same personal benefits if they had similarly dedicated themselves to meditation, or doing a bunch of items on their bucket list, particularly if that was done with some expectation of personal growth? Unless or until some proper research about Scientology’s results is done, that’s a question, though it’s likely – and the evidence from other types of research, suggests – that it’s a big factor, if not even the major factor.
A “placebo” effect is actually a cop out. In the more recent studies, it’s becoming obvious that some internal belief is/was powerful enough to create the effect. We are far more powerful than we have yet to understand. A terrific book on the subject is “The Biology of Belief” by Dr. Bruce Lipton. 2014 update version is the most current.
Todd, you are so right. I can think of many experiences in my life where the “honeymoon” phase of some pleasant new experience was more delightful than the later phases. Shoot, when you really think about it, that applies to almost everything in life!
You know what is scary? Some other creepy guru will be using LRH and his destructive “religion” as a playbook to create a new harmful organization, preying on good folk who are only looking for answers and happiness in an uncaring universe. It all makes me so sad.
All we can do is speak out and try to stop good people from stepping over the edge into these inhuman organizations like scientology.
Thanks a lot terra, your articles already can be summarized in a good book.
By the way Personal Integrity was a course after which a sucked in, in week I was on the purif then life repairment and there quickly I was already arc straightwired, by the way almost all my big wins stopped after that.
As I was never in I tend to stay away from discussions about COS philosophy (or bs, or whatever you want to call it).
Just a thought.
If we all are pan-determined and decide to go to Mike’s place to have a beer over at his house it would be very busy at his place. Just note that in that case Mike himself would also decide to have a beer at his place.
More busy than at the average Idle Org.
Good thing Mike has a virtual place here.
Cheers!
🙂
Good post.
As usual well written
Funny to take a pan determined look at Scientology.
Describes the process fairly,without hype and melodrama.
As a bestselling writer -books translated in 24 languages-,I appreciate the work it takes to
write one single posts where you all strip it down to the basics.
Keep writing.Look forward to many eloquent and informative posts.
Xenu’s, what books did you write if you feel comfortable answering? If not the name, at least the subject or fiction/non-fiction.
CPO——It seems that Xenu is the “ghost writer” for all those LRON books that his name gets stamped on.
Thanks, Xenu.
Another well-written and thoughtful article TC. It appears as though one of the biggest traps we are all tempted into getting ourselves ensnared in, is to allow someone else to think for us (true for not only Scientologists, but for all of us).
I’ve found that thinking can be one of the most difficult and exhausting things a person can do. It’s much easier to just let someone else do the thinking for us, and for us to just regurgitate a bunch of recycled talking points to make us feel as though we are 100% correct and unquestionably confident in our own sets of beliefs (which ironically, are really just someone else’s sets of beliefs that we’re repeating ad nauseam).
And I would imagine that we are all susceptible to it (just watch any heated political debate between two groups of people). It seems like it’s just an aspect of human nature that applies to all of us, including me, you, those still in the mental prison of Scientology, and every single other person walking the face of the Earth.
Granted, those inside of the world of cults seem to have been deeply ensnared in this mindset, which I would imagine is probably one of the most difficult mental chains to break free from. But we all must constantly challenge ourselves to make sure we aren’t falling into the same trap (which I’ve done many times and will likely do many times more). Hopefully more and more Scientologists will start challenging their own pre-conceived notions and beliefs and start thinking for themselves.
Overall, I believe that we must all work very hard to actually be able to think for ourselves. Only then can any of us truly achieve a measure of “self-determinism”, which is another way of saying that we can finally have more control over our own destiny in life.
Thanks again for the great post Terra Cognita. It not only gives insight into the mindset of a Scientologist, but also can serve as a warning for all of us to not fall into the same mental trap of allowing someone else to determine our own course in life.
Thanks, Mick.
Mick, it’s generally acknowledge that human beings evolved with cognitive biases that can mislead our individual judgement and decision-making, while adapting to living in hunter-gatherer groups where collaboration and group survival (including survival of one’s genetic pool, if not oneself) were primary. And one of the principal mechanisms of cognitive biases, is that the allow us to rely on others for elements of our decision-making, particularly those based on cumulative knowledge. We couldn’t have advanced in relatively primitive times, and certainly couldn’t now, if we were limited to living with only those processes and artifacts that we completely understood ourselves, like making a shoe or that the earth is round.
In human society, we’re inevitably reliant on the experience and judgement of others who understand things that we simply do not have time to fully learn about ourselves. The problem comes when we are overly reliant on others, particularly single individuals or small groups, and fail to engage in at least some scrutiny ourselves in critical matters, such as consulting alternative sources of knowledge and expertise, and paying adequate attention to signs that the “source” (!) we have relied on may be faulty and should not be relied upon.
There’s some good basic information on cognitive biases, including an illustrative infographic, at:
This Graphic Explains 20 Cognitive Biases That Affect Your Decision-Making (That Screw Up Your Decisions)
http://lifehacker.com/this-graphic-explains-20-cognitive-biases-that-affect-y-1730901381
There must be a local cult-Anon group in Clearwater where a poor, scared, kid in the SeaOrg can find refuge and help (???)
Is there anything like a battered woman shelter for fleeing members in Clearwater or Hemet? I don’t live anywhere near those locations, so just wondering.
I can see a possibility of picketing in Clearwater, or any scientology location for that matter, constantly advertising to the poor zombies that they can find help out there if they are thinking of leaving, and that there is help and support available.
That is exactly what one of my posts was about….people “locked in” because they know they have nowhere to run to for help or comfort. How can one “blow” when you have no one on the outside to let know you’ve “escaped”….where do you live, who will help you & your family (if they go with you) with shelter, food, clothing, financial assistance until one can find employment.
When one is brainwashed into only ONE way of thinking, it would be extremely difficult to adjust your entire life to living on the outside in the so called “Wog world” that you’ve been taught to fear
.
I hope and pray that in Clearwater and the Hemet area, there might be those willing to help. A fair sized rented store front with a few cots in the back, a shower, donated clothing & food, some HELP from former “organization members” who have walked the walk & can “talk the talk”(COS lingo) so that the person who has escaped feels comfortable speaking out.
Wouldn’t it be lovely to have a Van drive by the Hemet location several times a day as a “rescue van”…but IF that were to happen, I am sure that DM would put a choke hold on the already tight security.
HOW just how do “they” get away with not allowing Sea Org or staff members to LEAVE at will…how do they get away with literally HUNTING down those who “blow”, like Aron & Claire…….seemingly gestapo like tactics to forcibly bring you back to “the fold” that you’ve just ran away/blown/escaped from..
A “billion year signed contract with a “religious organization” seems to be permitted to take away one’s PERSONAL freedom….right here in the USA???? REALLY? Sickening beyond belief.
So do you have a song I can play?
Hopefully a “swan song” when COS circles the toilet and gets flushed.
L Yash, I am willing to get this thing up and running, and put some of my money on the line. I don’t live in the United States, but I am in North America.
I would love to be a part of scientology rescue foundation, so how can we communicate privately? Mike Rinder, you might be able to put people like me and L Yash together, O.K?
WAYC, I haven’t seen George weigh in recently, but he has been talking about an anti-cult center in Clearwater, and I hope is paying attention to some of the ideas being discussed here. Thanks for asking a good question, that has sparked some interesting discussion. I’m going to comment on a couple of responses.
As to resources, it’s been posted that the FBI will actually help escaping Sea Org members as victims of human trafficking, which I assume is correct, though it hasn’t been much publicized. It would be interesting to find out if any other groups will help as well, and find ways to start to try to get that information to Sea Org members. And on a longer horizon, one of the reasonable legal changes I think should be worked towards, is to require that human trafficking information and warnings be posted in workplaces, including communal living compounds where individuals are performing free labor, similar to what is required now in terms of postings for workplace safety and wages – there would be a broad coalition of allies for such efforts, since they don’t just apply to cults.
The idea had also occurred to me for something I was thinking of as a “blow bus,” that periodically drove around Clearwater and even stopped at some of the same (presumably public) stops as the Scientology buses. A key part of that would be to have advertising-like messages on the sides that provided basic information on issues such as human trafficking, as well as phone numbers and websites. A lot of tourism information centers operate out of parked buses, and so that might actually dovetail with the idea of a cult information center.
Also, If I recall, in the 1990s there was something of a cult recovery center, I think in a rural area in the Northeastern US. I don’t know what happened to them, but that was around the time that Scientology was attacking CAN, and the center might have suffered the same fate. I don’t even know how formally it was organized, but I do remember some reference to it.
I’d certainly be willing to donate to such efforts. The attempts to raise money for billboards don’t seem to have been long-term successes, but perhaps there is enough attention on the issue that there would be opportunities for broader fundraising, including even from foundations and government.
p.s. If it’s true that Sea Org qualify as victims of human trafficking, besides trying to get them word about resources available for them to re-enter society, it ought to be pointed out to the outside individuals and groups that Scientology front groups are trying to “safepoint.”
PeaceMaker, your comments are really sinking in. I would be willing to be a volunteer “BlowBus” bus driver to help people who want to escape but are too scared to make the attempt. I would be willing to donate to a shelter for blown scientologists too.
As a caring community, we can make this happen. Mike Rinder, please help with this! Let’s all pitch in.
S’about right. You ARE free… Free to CHOOSE to serve Scientology and DM to the exclusion of all else. That’s self determinism. You self-determined that you will let the church determine your values, goals, relationships, belief system and choices from here on out. That constitutes choice. Like drug addiction. You make the first choice to snort cocaine or shot heroine and ever after the drugs make the choices for you. Easy-Peesy Hubbard-Cheesy. “Can or Cannot be controlled by his environment by his own choice”. Well there ya go. So go shut down all the anti Scientology web sites. It is all just a matter of choice, and credit card balance.
Terra C : I read this with great heartache for those who seemingly dedicated themselves to something they whole heartedly believed in only to one day see the light , how THEY no longer had a life because every aspect of their lives was being controlled 100 %. I mentioned it before, hos hurt all of you must have been and still are, and the courage & strength it to for ANY of you to pick up and get the HELL out.
Can anyone give a description of HOW you rebuilt your lives once you got out? I am curious to know how you re-established yourselves on the “outside” wog world”….did you find work immediately? Did you have others on the outside to help you re-adjust? How long it took to re-establish a life outside the cult?
I am asking this in the HOPE that someone who is STILL on the inside might read some of your personal stories that YES< it takes a lot of work but you CAN build a new life outside of CO$. Maybe your stories will give those who feel hopeless that they will forever be "locked in"….the courage to leave.
The "disconnection policy sickens me and chills me to the core. I pray that Leah & Mike will discuss this fully in Season #2, along with the issue of members being placed "in the hole" for undetermined periods of time.
L Yash: For me, leaving was easy. I wasn’t in the Sea Org; nor was I on staff at a lower org or mission. I had a well-established business and good friends and family on the outside.
I didn’t have any relatives stuck inside, either, so I never worried about disconnection. My life is great.
For a penniless SO member, with little education, no experience operating in the real world, and no friends outside the church, it’s a whole different story. Especially, for those whose family are all Scientologists.
Terra C…..Thank you so much for your reply! I knew a few young people decades ago who got involved with Hare Krishna, Moonies and CO$…some got in pretty deeply, but got out in a few years. They were broke, & had no direction in life. Some “made it” on the outside…others became involved with drugs and alcohol.& came to sad endings in their lives.
MY deepest concern is for those you mentioned, Sea Org or staff or those deeply in for decades who know nothing else. Born in’s who are really young are a double concern as it’s the ONLY life they know…… YES, something HAS to be done, but what? There is no “safe place” for them to go if the members want to BLOW…. ..
If the “hole” is still being used…horrific indeed and I am sure there has to be evidence of the abuses that entails. How does an “organization/church” get way with to seemingly hold people hostage…the “6 foot razor blade sharp wire” isn’t used to keep people OUT….it seem to be used to keep members IN.
I KNOW I am asking too much of Leah & Mike….but my deepest request would be to cover some of this on Season II….
Terra, luckily for me I, too, was in your situation. Other than my own cognitive dissonance, the cult had no other leverage on me. When I wax pejorative of others who seem unable to “cognite” on what are obviously the reasons they should ditch C0$, I have to remind myself to remind myself that for others its not so simple.
L Yash, I so love that you asked this question. The stories of the people I’ve read today have been really good.
I was a staff member briefly at the beginning of my scn experience. We had a dynamic ED at our mission who was funny, irreverent and someone I wished to please. I was young and ridiculously willing to do awful, boring and difficult things in order to be validated.
I was the perfect mark for this cult. Young, insecure, not a lot of friends, and drifting and needing an anchor. Well I got my anchor and was initially very gung-ho. I did my fifteen hours a week study and saved up for auditing. I wanted auditing to work so badly that I worked super hard as the PC so I’d find whatever the auditor asked for.
I bared my soul when overts were asked for, I always came up with incidents and dived past life (great imagination, right?) when I didn’t F/N on the this life incident. I was so gullible. After giving all my money and spare time for years I had the big cog that no one but me cared if I survived financially, so I needed to stop telling all to the reg.
When I got in I loved my reg who’d pull me off course and we’d talk and make plans to improve my income and job situation. (No college) But my reg and I were creative and when the reg said your income will go up after your auditing we figured out how to make it so.
When that reg said “make the money” I did. And being pushed like that by someone I deeply admired is something I can’t bring myself to regret. I felt the love. Then that reg left to get married and join staff with their new spouse.
The new reg was just ordinary and truth be told, losing that mentor in my life was sad. I kept trying to make friends with future regs, like Hy Levy at Flag who I really adored even as he pushed my bank account into the red.
I remember shocking reg David Light when I burst into tears. He’d yelled at me and I was so shocked. I requested a different reg, and got one.
But my regging history aside I was always trying to prove myself and it was the glue of validation that kept me pushing my way up the bridge against all the odds.
I was one of the younger people who made it to OT VII. But all the borrowing, regging, pushing, targeting and the horrible grind of solo auditing while madly PTPed left me in ill health, old before my time and a bit of a wreck.
Of course good girl that I was, I was all smiles and cheer leaderish at the events and it was my fault that my health was faltering and I was a 30 year old mess. In debt, bad debt, crappy used car, renting, not owning, marriage hanging on only because my spouse was true blue, not because he was happy. How could he be happy, we’d been one good illness or car accident from bankruptcy for my entire – years – of OT VII solo auditing.
Somewhere on OT VII the cognitive dissonance started to get louder. I met a guy that had trouble sleeping. He looked like death, yet he was auditing on OT VII. He said he just had to handle that part of his case that was causing the sleeplessness. He’d been to doctors and tried tons of stuff. He was hanging onto the hope that OT VII getting complete would handle him. I’m guessing he died on the level, he was doing that bad.
Another guy high up on OT levels had an ethics folder room all to himself with all his adultery, lying and heartbreaking women with “you’re so special” love em and leave em ways. But he’d buy more books and crap and they’d let him back on and he’d find another gal and have sex and leave her feeling dirty and used. Ka-ching!
I was wondering how this guy could break up marriages, lie and just be a sex addict and be on OT VII while I was sent to Ethics for yelling at my spouse or some nothing type thing. The cognitive dissonance grew louder.
I quietly without “enturbulating” anyone about my scene slowly re-built my health and got back on course. And didn’t like it.
I hated the events. I started pulling away. A love bombing mission was sent and got me back on. But I’d become a “bad scientologist” and even the love bombing couldn’t make me want to do stuff that no longer gave me pleasure.
But I stuck around. I won’t even go into the unjust and off policy and out tech things dished to me on OT VII. I sucked up so much resentment, and anger. Just sucked it up.
Then my spouse started getting treated poorly. Bad move. You can hurt me, but do not hurt someone I love. That was my breaking point.
I left, quietly. It wasn’t hard as I didn’t work for any scientologists, and I found I could survive the loss of my friends. Who clearly didn’t know the true definition of friendship. My spouse and I are well, luckier than many others our age.
Thank you for sharing. Remarkable.
🙂
To L Yash–thank you for bringing this up regarding what do you do when you get out– and Clearly Not Clear… Your story resonated with me.
Like you, CNC, I, too, got in young. In my early twenties, I had just moved to a new city and was really alone right from the start. I was looking for an honest community of people with whom I could connect spiritually, ethically and creatively.
That’s how it started.
I had little in the way of a formal education but had talent and an adventurous spirit. Initially, I did well on the early courses/processing and it helped with my profession (or so I thought at the time).
I now look back and it’s no wonder I am still alone 30 years later wondering how I am going to survive. I was never staff but took my hits as a public person married to a long time Scn.
I’ve found it helpful coming here to this online community and blog. It makes it a little easier to know that I am in good company. It is a bit curious to me that the “never ins” have so much compassion and interest.
Wouldn’t it be great to create some sort of “retreat” somewhere like an “aftermath rehab” for those of us who need to brush up on job skills, social skills and give ourselves some time to heal? That would just be so cool.
Thanks for the topic today, Terra.
You consider past lives “imaginary”? Just because they’re spoken of in scio hardly means they’re not real. Literally billions of human beings consider them to be real, and have done so for over 5000 years. I directly experienced some through auditing and was able to prove one of them true. Helped a lot.
thegman, there has NEVER been one single instance of a past life that has been scientifically verified.
At one time countless millions of people believed in fairies, brownies, gnomes and the like. That is meaningless as to whether or not they are real.
I have gotten reads in auditing recollecting events in this life which I later discovered via documented proof did not happen as recalled. I merely believed they did and therefore got the read and I got that momentary sense of relief and optimism about the future. Very pleasant indeed.
Whether a thought form is a memory or a fantasy can sometimes be determined through documented proof. For instance my vivid ‘memory’ of an old girlfriend accompanying me and my family on a vacation as a teen had to be relabeled ‘fantasy’ when I recently found an old photo showing that girl to be somebody else. Indeed the vacation itself did take place. Still, that false memory remains vivid in my mind.
In short, there is no difference between a fantasy and a memory other than the label we give it. They aren’t made of different substances. Maybe we can recall past lives but within a single past life recollection what parts of that recollection are memory and what parts fantasy?
Roger, just read a great book about that, “The Memory Illusion”, Dr. Julia Shaw https://www.amazon.com/Memory-Illusion-Remembering-Forgetting-Science-ebook/dp/B019CGXQA8/ref=sr_1_1_twi_kin_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1492982643&sr=8-1&keywords=memory+illusion She talks about ways to create false memories that are 100% indistinguishable from real ones. And the method is startlingly similar to what goes on in a Scientology session.
There was a craze in the late 80s early 90s that was finding evidence of satanic rituals in the pasts of ordinary children. Using hypnotic regression or just by making leading suggestions. Then they found out that you could induce a false memory by these techniques and the “satanic ritual epidemic” became an embarrassing example of manipulation by unscrupulous promoters.
I am not saying that this proves anything about past lives, for or against, but it shows that the leading questions, “latent read scouting”, suggestions that there must be something earlier, encouragement of the pursuit of vague impressions that “become clearer” as you progress and so on are actually able to create fake memories. And these fake memories become just as “real to you” as real ones.
We should think twice before making life-changing decisions based on the pursuit of “past lives”, no matter how electrifying we find them or how excited we may be to discover this seemingly broad new vista of human experience. Remember what happened to Bridey Murphy.
Yes:)
CNC & Titlewave…Thank you so much for opening your hearts and lives to me. I KNOW somewhere on the “inside” someone is reading your life’s history and saying HEY..that sounds just like ME’…..maybe it will give them courage to get OUT now!
Leaving what you’ve know for a long period of time to start your life all over again takes so much COURAGE, strength of character, & really looking deep inside oneself to see that there IS another choice. You’ve been thought so much and like some folks I’ve seen go through similar events, some came out really well, some did not.
I can’t imagine the heartache of this low life guy using women as if he was owed sexual favors. I also knew people like this involved in other “cults”, way back when I had a friend whose cult leader was “having his way” with many young girls and also with the wives of members of the cult. His “rule” was that HE was their “spiritual leader” and that as members of this group, ALL was to be shared, including wives and children. He got away with all of this perversion and escaped justice. He is STILL out there somewhere if he is still alive.
It seems as a never in, IMO….CO$ punishes some and others simply get away with their crimes against others. As long as one is FAITHFUL to “the leader” they can do as they please.
FLDS is like that….if a male member displeased Warren Jeffs….Warren Jeffs would simply take away one, some or all of this man’s wives & children & GIVE them to another male member who was more loyal. The “wives” had NO CHOICE, they had to go live with another man & be subjected to rape or beatings by someone they did not agree to be “married to”.
I dearly hope and pray that somewhere (noted in another post) even a “store front” location could be opened by former members where someone who has escaped/blown can go to for help. Maybe a few cots for sleep, a shower, donated clothing, donated food from the community, counseling, help with education & jobs. I say “former members” because as I noted someone who is recently out, would feel comfortable knowing that another former member has walked the walk & can “talk the talk” (scientology lingo the never ins don’t understand)….that they WILL see they can do well on the outside.
My deepest love and respect to you Clearly Not Clear & Title…..WOW you’ve really opened A LOT of eyes today….& HEARTS too! Thank you!
CNC, thanks for sharing that detailed and insightful personal account.
One thing that particularly stood out for me, was that what happened for you in a earlier and somewhat gentler time in Scientology, is that you found someone in an org willing to be a sort of mentor and career coach. That was of course incidental to Scientology – but Scientology would try to get you to credit that to Hubbard (and, now, COB).
Clearly Not, I have two words for you to send to all scientologists, and you must do this with all conviction and venom… “F*** YOU”!
And then you must dig deep inside you to scrape all your innermost vilest mucous, and fling it hard against the creature called scientology. You have allies with you, so fight this shriveling organization. Good on ‘ya!.
As heartbreaking as it is to not have my son in my life due to disconnection, being out from under the oppressive thumb of the church and not supporting the abuses (if only by not staying a member and waving my true banner) was without a doubt the best thing to do. How to rebuild ones life is different for everyone. Scientologists as a general rule have a good work ethic and sometimes that’s the only start one needs. My income did not suffer because I left and in fact, has gotten better and not just because I’m no longer giving tons of money to the church. The way I have “rebuilt” is to just put one foot in front of the other and try to stay creative and upbeat. It gets easier and easier.
Frankly, getting out is the best statement anyone can make as far as ending the abuses committed by members of this church and by david miscavige. If all who were done with this church and are who are just “under the radar” or drifting away quietly would stand up or speak out against the abuses and the lies, the church and david miscavige would end that much sooner. It makes a difference in ending any tyranny.
Good for you McCarran. I would say the only possibly valid six month check would be to your dentist, who might only extract a tooth as opposed to the entire content of your savings account.
“six month check” – toxic words 😉 I stay away from any and all. LOL
We never know what life will be like on the outside, it breaks my heart to continually hear the saddest of the sad, stories of the sickening “disconnection” policy. NO ONE should ever have the right to separate us from our children or extended family. Brainwashing is a horrific event, the organization is blaming YOU and they have your children also blaming YOU.
Karma is a bitch, one day the sun will rise on the downfall of this organization and those on the former members on the outside will see justice. I hope and pray your son eventually reaches out to you so you can once again hold him in your arms. My heart aches for you, and thank you for your words of wisdom.
I guess it was easy for me too.
I was on staff for 7 years but never Sea Org. (I always refused to join the Sea Org.)
After I completed my contract I stayed on as a public for another 20 years – made it to OT V and did a lot of training. Been out for about 11 years now.
When I joined staff I already had a decent education and I always stayed on good terms with my family,.
To me, the poison dwarf was just the dude currently running Scientology and I never felt any allegiance to him personally whatsoever. I never acknowledged either him or RTC in any success story, on ending a course, or for anything else. Probably this is not allowed these days. Back in the day you were more able to say what you actually felt.
After leaving staff, I had no means of earning any money but almost immediately I was able to start over in a new and very well-paying career.
Scientology was actually very helpful to me in getting this started in an indirect way. I am of a naturally indolent disposition and the idea of getting up the Bridge was what motivated me into working hard and making a go of this.
Of course, Scientology was a huge drain on my income although I never went into debt until right at the end when I tried to get onto OT VII. It was my experiences at Flag at this time that led to my exit from Scientology.
It took me a couple of years to clear my debts.
After that, all good really!
My career is completely unconnected to Scientology and did not go away after I left. I am now in my early 60s, still in very high demand and life is great.
Cavalier, VVVWD on leaving the cult. I’m so glad you left and that you made it go right to make a career and have money and survive. You did great! And we’re all glad you’re out of the church and into the sunlight. What year(s) did you try to get onto OT VII at Flag? O was on OT VII and saw it getting worse and worse as far as predatory regging going over the years.
Keeping a long story short, I had tons of help from my family, all non-Scientologists.
I had no driver’s license, no credit history, no bank accounts, no usable references more recent than 25 years ago, no contacts, no networking skills, well over 50 years old, and some pretty nasty health problems (though not life threatening). A two year college degree from the 70s.
While I was in the Big Blue “routing out” I bought a book about computer repair and studied that. Then I convinced my handlers to allow me to do a CompTIA A+ PC Technician test and passed that, so I had a certificate. Then I talked them into letting me go to the DMV and get a driver’s license. Then my folks found some US Bonds that my grandmother had put in my name, so I cashed those and started a secured credit card account and bank account.
Halfway back to the real world!
But still it was a real rough road to find a decent job at 55+ with no references and a decades old Junior College degree. Finally I just dropped the old degree from my resume so they couldn’t figure out my age from that, and took out a lot of the really weird sounding “experience” (from the Sea Org), and started getting interviews. But one look at my grey hair and interviews became don’t call us we won’t call you.
I really strongly suggest to anyone in that position, don’t try too hard for a really good job or tear up the job sites or spend tons of time on the internet in the library. Just get a retail job or fast food or a temp agency, whatever you can, and get on health insurance fast so you find out the hidden health problems from decades of body abuse. Believe me, if you have been in the Sea Org for a few years you need to see a doctor! And a dentist! Then when you have a little experience and are back on your feet you can try to get a job in your field.
Finally I got a job from a really desperate local in-house computer repair office. They had two guys leaving and absolutely had to have someone driving around changing hard drives for those who paid for in-house on-call service. My folks bought me a used car, let me sleep in the basement and I had a career! Sort of.
But I was still a hard-core true believer. You can take a Sea Org member out of the Sea Org but you really have to work to get the Sea Org out of the Sea Orger. I was kind of glumly working on my Freeloader Debt and thinking I would have to do six hour weekend commutes every weekend to restudy all my training at the closest org.
Then Dave Miscavige rode to the rescue! He came out with the Freedom Magazine “Posse of Lunatics” article, which features a lot of my old friends. I could tell he wrote it from the language. And I could tell it was all lies because I knew these people.
So poking around a bit I found Tony Ortega at the Village Voice and got some of the true scoop. Then with the help of Jon Atack’s great book and Russell Miller, and the many articles here and later at the Bunker, and the many folks who replied to my faltering and incoherent comments at the blogs (Thank you all from the bottom of my heart!) I finally started to figure it out.
It is not easy to admit to yourself that you have been taken in, dedicated your life to a lie, deceived others, neglected your friends and family, all to the glory of a con man. Some use counseling or get help from other exes, some just go on hoping forever, some have serious issues.
I use information from Steve Hassan’s books, from Jon Atack’s Open Minds Foundation web site, from books and articles, from Jefferson Hawkins’ excellent “Counterfeit Dreams”, from books by other exes. With tears and laughter, love and forgiveness, I try to work it out.
Mike and Leah’s shows also help, plus they are accessible to my family. So they can finally understand what it is really about. My family saved my life, just out of love and respect, but they never really understood what it was that I was struggling to deal with until they saw the “Aftermath” shows.
Still a work in progress, and it is not clear how I can “retire” with little savings and barely enough years contributing to Social Security to qualify for benefits. It all works out mathematically if I retire at 70 and die at 75. Beyond that, my golden years are more of the tinny sort. Another point of advice for others, whatever else you do get some kind of a job for long enough to qualify for Medicare and Social Security. It will be rough when you can’t work anymore if you don’t at least have that.
Tried to make a long story short, but didn’t succeed. Hope your question is at least partly answered, L Yash
Bruce. This is really an excellent comment.
If you would like to flesh it out as you might feel it needs it (I only say this because u said you tried to keep it brief) I would like to publish this as an article as I feel it has very valuable information that I think should be better preserved and more easily accesssd than buried in a comment.
U can email me if u want to discuss.
Agreed, Bruce you have a lot to contribute. You have a birds eye view on many essential techniques experiences.
I would love you to do an on going blog post here like Terra. I may do you good getting it off your chest. I know it will help others.
Warm Regards,
Brian
Nix the word techniques.
Dear Mike….
.I HAD to ask that question, as a never in I had a great desire to actually hear from former members what life for THEM individually had been. I really feel that by having their personal stories noted on the blog, others might gain some insight into their own personal stories within the organization, that they weren’t the only ones who dealt with the same treatment and subjected to the same abuse.& lived the same lie about “the organization”
For those who are never ins like myself, and those who are STILL in, hopefully these stories will be an eye opener and give those still in courage to leave, no matter WHAT age they currently are. To spend 20+ years or 1 year “in” the same results seem to be reoccurring.
I hope that now you’ve read some of these heart breaking stories from former members some of who your personally might know, THIS would be good “fodder” for Season #2.
WHAT could be better exposure then the TRUTH.
I can fully understand why “What Are Your Crimes” says he/she “lashes out in anger”…THIS would be the place to do just that…… …so much support and love here & most of all UNDERSTANDING…….so wonderful or Mike & Tony to have blogs to do just that!
My best wishes to everyone on the blog, especially the brave former members who have willingly opened their hearts to others with your own personal stories of life on the inside.
YOU have helped each other more than you will ever know!
Thank you!
Guys that leave can always get a job driving for Uber.
Bruce,
Thank you for this, as well as for most all of your comments. You are so open, honest and sincere. It is impossible to read what you write and not be genuinely moved.
I hope you take Mike up on his offer to publish this. Also, as far as your pending retirement goes, you should seriously consider writing a book about your own experiences. You have a way of describing what you experienced in a way that is compelling and you have an innate talent for writing. The climate is ripe for the subject right now. You really should consider it. Sincerely
I agree.
Exemplary: Thanks for posting this. Bruce should write, as should us all so inclined… A lot of healing (for lack of a better word) may come of this. My advice: Start a journal at the very least. (Most of us have LOTS of KR’s (ignored) this may be excellent fodder, should one need reminders….)
Also…. A note on “PTSness..” JUSTICE is an amazing remedy… Elcon in his “infinite wisdom” was clever to never point that out as it might make Scn culpable for their crimes.
The “Why is always YOU.” What a flippin’ con, Lron.
Which reminds me: MM: LOVE your poems, do you have one for self determinisn or did I miss that?
Bruce: Thank you!!! You have a great perspective and you offered solutions about what to do re Social Security, finding a job and going to a doctor.. It’s obvious that you really care about your fellow… You are incredibly resourceful– loved your advice—and your “attitude of gratitude.” Keep it up!
Bruce, that was a great comment, as most of your comments are. From my past recollection of your comments you seem to be very knowledgeable in the computer world.
Your story though gave me some mixed reactions. First, that I am so glad that I got to start my life at such a young age in comparison. Even though 15 years of my restart were spent in South Africa where it doesn’t help towards Social Security benefits. Secondly, any UTRs or current SO members who may read this (hint..OSA) should really wake up and leave when you can. One has to work a real job and contribute to Social Security in order to benefit from the program. If you wait too long to get a real job NO ONE is going to look after you financially when you most need it. You have to be paying into Social Security. If you remain in the cult, SCN will never look after you.
Leave while early, leave quickly!
Bruce, Yes I second Mike’s suggestion that you write a complete article on how to leave the SO and get your legal and working ruds and body ruds in, kind of like a checklist for others. And you’re right that working long enough to get SS is crucial. Although you can also buy your way itno SS if you haven’t worked long enough by paying money into it. But most can’t do that because they’ve just left the SO and don’t have money. If Davey had been legal himself, he would have been paying FICO for years for the SO workers so that they actually would qualify for Medicare in their old age. But he instead paid them next to nothing and didn’t pay the employer’s portion into the system, and so now ex SO as they age have a huge PTP of not qualifying to get Medicare and the health care they need. If you are on Obamacare, when you turn 65 you no longer qualify to get Obamacare because it is just assumed you’d be on Medicare at 65. So your suggestions are so needed as a full article. And YES right your own book!!!!!
You could theoretically maybe get married to someone who could help. Myself, I never wanted money and was fortunate my dad taught me to live off the land. I wanted wisdom. I was forced to get wiser leaving Scientology. Thank goodness for the Posee of Lunatics. Thank you for your story Bruce 🙂
Bruce: Thank you for that.
Bruce, sometimes I lash out in my posts against scientology, and wonder where all this anger comes from. Your story is exactly why I am so angry.
First, please know that you are a wonderful person and I really believe your future is a lot brighter than you might think.
Second, thank you for sharing your story.
I shall kick and scream against this despicable organization until the the current leader is jailed, the celebrity shills hang their heads in shame, and the founder LRH is despised worldwide for the evil he unleashed on the world.
Bruce & Cavalier…..I am so very proud of both of you. Leaving could not have been easy and to restart one’s life all over in what is still considered “middle age”….what an awesome “ride” for you Bruce. Your really worked hard to get where to wanted to go, and I am proud of you! Not many would have the guts and determination to do that, God Bless you1
Cavalier, to give your all and to walk away from that is mind boggling….something inside you told you that you were BETTER than what you had, that alone no doubt was what got you to walk away from “it” and that nasty person who controls it all.
For What Are Your Crimes…I would HOPE that ALL of you would kick, scream, yell from the roof tops, about everything that you experienced that was unjust. Maybe THEN others will truly begin to listen and more investigative doors would be open to review about this organization.
CPO…this is what is needed….exposure of the misdeeds.& for anyone who might be “bedazzled or sucked in or hanging on “…..time to wake up and get out!
Wow Bruce, thanks for writing that. Best of luck buddy.
L Yash. I could write a couple of chapters about leaving the SO and having to start over but I’ll try to be succinct. My parents took me out of High School at 17 (1 year remaining) and my parents, 2 sisters and I went to the Apollo in 1971. Luckily before I joined, I got to go to normal schools in Iowa, was fairly good in sports, did well in academics and I was popular and other than when at home, had no SCN influence. So I knew how to live a normal life – as much as a 17 year old knows.
I stayed in the Sea Org until I was 29 years old. We first got jobs in Texas where my parents were living and they helped us with a place to stay. Within 6 months we moved to South Africa and my wife’s parents helped us with housing and food until we were fully on our feet. It took us a couple of months to be on our feet.
I lied about my education, my past employment experience and got into sales. Sales is something that one really doesn’t have to have specific training. I consider I have a degree in bullshitting. I have done sales my entire life since leaving. I also started a computer company (sales to corporate) in South Africa. I’m now a Mortgage Broker – selling loans. All of my jobs were great successes and I have owned about 4 or 5 homes both in South Africa and now in the US.
I think one must REALLY start over in all aspects of your life and mental outlook. I made a point to not tell anyone about my previous connection to SCN. I’ve had buddies that have known me for 30 years and until a year ago they had no idea of my previous relation to SCN. I’ve always felt that SCN is too weird to admit to being involved. Also, until the last year or so I basically blocked all memories of my Sea Org days. I wanted nothing to do with SCN or the SO. I became a real “wog” in all aspects and I started my life from scratch at nearly 30 years old.
It really helps to have family or friends help while you get started in a real life. I don’t think it even has to be one’s immediate family (in case someone has parents in the cult). I would bet many Aunt’s, Uncles and even cousins would help someone trying to leave this cult. It seriously doesn’t take long to get started on a job and making real money (even if minimum wage) feels like being a mult-millionaire compared to Sea Org pay.
And life becomes good again.
Clealy: I think we must have come from the same planet.
CPO…thank you so much for your past involvement with the “organization”….I am so glad you got out early….and that you had family support too. I know that having those who will stand shoulder to shoulder with you, to get you to restart your life is one of the greatest helps and motivations one can ever have!
Sometimes we have to block out what we once knew, as much as there might have been certain aspect of that past we felt good about, you know what your life would have been like had to remain locked in like so many.
With you hard work and dedication, good things have come your way! I have nothing but a feeling of great joy for you and your family! Best wishes always!
L Yash, you asked a good question as I also have been curious about how long-time, middle-age SO members successfully reintegrate back into society; with nothing to put on their resumes, no health insurance, and possibly no family to help them. Appreciate Bruce’s point of view.
Thank you yo everyone who THANKED ME for my question. I TRULY am awestruck by the open hearted honesty that has been displayed. Everyone was very forthright in their tales of horror and how some risked everything to restart a new life. Sadly, having to leave loved ones who refuse to “blow” is the most hurtful of all…BUT it is THEIR decision to STAY.
.
A new life not without risk, as in Bruce’s story, to be in one’s 50’s and have nothing to fall back on, or so you say…but you DO have wonderful GIFTS Bruce….the ability to create your own “Mr. Fixit Shop” where you can offer up your computer services…or as a consult to someone who is opening a business and needs EXPERT help in setting up their computer system….OR as a friend of mine did…GIVE CLASSES to novices that know little to nothing about computers (kinda like ME, haha!).
For many of you, you are free of the chains that once bound you. Free to go where you want, when you want without a “monitor” tagging along to make sure you return to the fold. The right to keep most of your salary (except taxes) for yourself r yourself and your family. to LIVE the life you should have had and NOW you really get to enjoy like reading newspapers, magazine, and watching TV Shows of your choice.
Breathe the fresh air of Freedom! I am really Revved up for Season #2!
Bravo! Well said Terra. Not an easy easy task conveying the deceptional use of self-determinism when dangled as bait by cults and other unscrupulous assholes.
Hubbard sure burnt the candle from both ends. His contradictions run through Scientology like a brush fire the more you wake up to the evidence that you were suckered more and more the further you advanced into the subject. There’s no such thing as OT on Scientology’s Bridge to Ruin & Miscavige is just pure asshole!
Terra, excellent post.
You described the bait and switch process perfectly.
When I was very young, and very dumb, that carrot looked extremely delicious. If it were not for an older woman who was on staff in Clearwater, back in the 80’s, who had taken an instant and severe dislike to me, the feeling being reciprocated, I may have stayed in long enough to find myself completely trapped, like so very many of my peers. I come to all of this with a “There, but for the grace of God, go I” perspective. Only all these years later, do I truly see just how much so many have and still do suffer because of this sinister and destructive cult.
Thank you.
+1! Outstanding post, e-angel. Especially those coming from foreign countries who believe their lives will be better in the US. They have no idea what they’re in for…
The bait is data and workable techniques to assist one to survive better. Its helpful; at least, I found it quite helpful.
What occurs along the way is that an arbitrary gets introduced one’s use of the tech, and arbitrary which evolves into the linchpin for any and all usage of the data and techniques.
This arbitrary is: “Scientology handles everything, so when deciding what to do or what not to do, always put what’s good for the Church of Scientology first, and eventually, everything will work out fine”. This is my concept of what it is and the phraseology is mine.
It is this arbitrary continually inserted into one’s usage of the tech which causes a thinking person to morph into a Sheeple, a Cultie, a robot.
In the beginning, as a new Scientologist, one has to be REMINDED to insert this arbitrary into the formulation of one’s decisions.
After a while one need never be reminded because it becomes AUTOMATIC to insert this arbitrary into every life decision.
“What’s good for Scientology” then becomes THE factor that most influences their decisions on all dynamics. A “What’s best for Scientology” decision is ALWAYS rational – yes, no matter how irrational the decision was based on obvious other factors, no matter harmful to their families, finances, or to their own consciences – no matter, its still “the most rational thing to do”. ALWAYS.
And Co$ REWARDS them for acting stupidly and irrationally, via plaques, pins, commendations and other bullshit.
They don’t spot thISoutpoint, thIS huge arbitrary they’ve inserted into their thinking, their decision making processes, which effectively turns the tech, for them, into a suppressive trap.
Between the razzle dazzle false flattery they get from the cherch (carrot) and the threat of being disconnected from family/loss of income/loss of eternity (stick), they don’t spot this arbitrary which is behind their “Prison of Belief”. (Brilliant title.)
If, and/or when, by some miracle they DO spot it, well, they’re out the door. These would be your UTRs, your blown staff or public.
I’d like to qualify what I wrote above in-so-far as it is writtenfrom the viewpoint of a former public Scientologist. I was never staff or SO. What I wrote wouldn’t apply that much to a Class V org staff member and not at all to a Sea Org member who is told precisely how to think and what to do and so forth, from the get-go. Scientology public get the slow frog boil; Class V staff are simmered on medium heat and Sea Org are thrown right into the boiling pot.
Aquamarine ,
Love the way you correlated the “arbitrary ” with the “linchpin ” . Interesting observations. I also like the way that you explained the varying degrees of being boiled. Lol.
Btw, Aquamarine is a really cool handle.
Well said.
I ask once more: How in hell can ANYONE lose their eternity? Just because scio says so? Just really try to grasp the total idiocy of the concept. If such is even remotely possible, Miscavige will be at the head of the line since he’s not even been audited since the early 90s! Case level? A Joke. And he doesn’t even make use of anything available, misuses virtually everything in order to create still more destruction and disaster for the cult. Very oddly, Miscavige IS scio’s worst enemy.
Even when I was in, I wondered. How can one be a Chairman of the Board, with out having a
Board of Directors ?
The dwarf is so OT, he don’t need no stinkln’ board of directors. He knows what’s best for everybody…
He was bored with the directors so he got rid of all of them.
Great observation! Miscavige is just living one big fat lie after another.
You could see this happening via the events, the early ones had lots of different presenters, later it was DM for the whole 3 hour show, I guess he felt that in the end he was the only person he could trust!
A Board of Directors would give DM a really big pain in the ASS…..they would not agree to everything he says or wants to do, they would “vote down” on certain situations they would disagree with. It’s a dictatorship and DM is the one and ONLY head “DICK”…..simple as that
Thanks, as always, TC.
My first thought when starting to read this, is what I find myself increasingly noticing in Hubbard’s works – his knowing little asides, a little sort of symbolic wink (and maybe he did give some cue of body language, in the original lectures), cluing in anyone really paying close attention that he’s about to pull a trick of distraction or deception. Here, it’s that he’s going to raise you to the point of awareness of being able to chose whether to be self-determined or other-determined – and at that point, if you let him and Scientology determine your life, and take your money and time, it’s your own fault, you were warned. That’s the justification of the con man – or the black magician.
I know that several others with much more direct experience of Hubbard’s work, including George and Brian, have come to much the same conclusion about how Hubbard operated. I would be interested to hear from others who do not quite see things that way, but who are interested in getting to the truth – which is where I was, until relatively recently.
Also, I want to note that the issue of pan-determinism is an interesting one – and one that I know the indies in particular love to talk about. From the critical perspective, I think it is one of the things that Hubbard believed only truly applied to himself, and possibly a handful of other “big beings” – and that Miscavige considers himself, and perhaps the other TC (Tom Cruise), to fall in to that category. In the broader view of things, I think that it is viable, if not even crucial in the modern world, for individuals to take a broad view of responsibility, though Hubbard’s take on pan-determinism might indeed be messy in some of its details, perhaps because it is colored by his particularly egoistic worldview; in modern views, the concept or a related version that might be more functionally useful, is sometimes referred to as shared responsibility.
Terra, good article and I have also seen the ironies and hypocrisy you speak of. But I don’t know what your sub title, “Penn and Teller” was referring to? I know they are a magician and sleight of hand act in Vegas. Was reference to them something to do with smoke and mirrors? It wasn’t clear in your article.
Cindy: Just as Penn and Teller deal in illusion and slight-of-hand, so did LRH. Much of his tech had people looking one way while “off to the side,” something else was going on.
PeaceMaker, I agree. I’ve come to believe LRH knew what he was up to. I’m quite sure he knew some of us would graduate from Scientology. 6 years ago after reading Amy Scobee’s book I was a basket case until I figured out the only way to fix myself was to get wiser then LRH. All the data is easy to find and free. Any one even ‘homeless’ persons like me can become wiser then the old man. There is no longer such a trap. The information is all around now. The only remaining trap is in each person’s mind they allowed to be put there. Work it all backwards if you have to but somehow please free your selves. There is so much more joy in life then worrying about Thursdays stats, making sure you don’t trip up, looking for what would LRH do. What will YOU do is self determination. 🙂
Excellent!
This is a really great article and you have expressed my viewpoints on freedom and responsibility perfectly. The big S dictates all aspects of members lives (if they let them) but promotes a belief system that promises self determinism and spiritual abilities that are unattainable.
I always thought that once you reached the point of self determinism a person would no longer need the big S to tell them what to do and how to think. Graduation would then be leaving the church automatically.
The realization that super spiritual states are just carrots that always require more money and less self determinism is the scientology “clear” cog. (as opposed to the dianetic clear cog which still applies)
I became self determined and had the scientology clear cog in 1980. But you know what? I am grateful for what I learned from the technology and for the gains I experienced spiritually while in it. I am really sorry to see the trap the church has become for so many!
Still Declared…. Eh=Eh
Can’t help but agree, Eh. I got a lot out of it but didn’t keep crediting it to someone else. I did the work, did the looking, had the cogs, did the crying, laughing and figuring it out. Around 1982, I knew I had “graduated” and very quietly left. I feel the same way about those things as I did then. I definitely kept on the spiritual path and learned still more. From my point of view, the journey never ends and I’m happily riding the rails into my own future. Everyday is a new adventure and will always be what I make of it. I wish you a very happy and beneficial future, Eh, and hope it never ends for you.
Like all cults, you are told what to do in Scientology. There is no freedom in Scientology. There is no discussion in Scientology. It is their way or the highway.
This is a mind bending, family destroying, financial ruining, toxic, totalitarian CULT. Run by a psychotic & evil dwarf who beats his staff. The ‘crazy’ in this cult is through the roof.
Don’t you hold back anything there Dude – say what you really mean about what you think of Scientology… OK?
Ok. And they wear creepy uniforms.
Correctomundo.
Very well described, Terra Cognita. As a member of the Church of Scientology you are more or less OWNED.
Scientology dangling carrot is ironically “The Bridge to Total Freedom”. Using that, the practice to get you to do what they want – with the pretense that it is in your best interest when in actual fact it is in their best interest (money and statistics) – is very aggressive.
Hubbard’s definition of slavery is “being positioned in another’s time and space”.
One day (I was in the Sea Org and on ethics lines and under constant surveillance for many months) I was reading this definition again and then realized that my own decisions were squashed over the years to nearly zero. That as per Hubbard’s own definition I was positioned in another’s time and space and thus was a slave. There was not much left anymore of my self-determinism and freedom.
Excellent points to consider. Very helpful. Thank you.
Very early on Hubbard wrote that if you offer a person total freedom you can attract and trap them. He used this to the hilt. Offering freedom while actually trapping a person in an evil cult. Hubbard was brilliant in a criminally insane kind of way.
Well delineated Terra!
Wynski: So right. Personal freedom is a huge attraction. And trap.
Just one more unfulfillable, unreachable goal within the parameters of Scientology. Nothing in this cult is reasonable or attainable. “Clear the planet” but for what is there is no society left? Scientology begins with the individual, slowly erasing what makes that person his or her own being. They become one more number in the Borg Collective. Erase what makes us individuals, destroy friendships and family bonds- destroy what makes society a community. Then what do you have? Scientology wants to clear the planet but if there is nothing left of humanity then what is the point? Has the organization even thought that far ahead?
*if* there is no society left.
Im sure Scamology never has. Its all bullshit!!
Good post Terra.
Yep, Ron figured it all out. Only he’s allowed to be self-determined and never questioned. Here’s an example:
We will not speculate here on why this was so or how I came to rise above the bank. We are dealing only in facts and the above is a fact — the group left to its own devices would not have evolved Scientology but with wild dramatization of the bank called “new ideas” would have wiped it out.
Well Ron, I question anything I damn well please, and your use of the plural pronoun ‘we’ is a not so subtle form of mind control. The truth is, you’re only speaking for yourself. Like others here, I prefer to make my own way.
Yep, Hubbard sure blew a gasket with his own egotistical nonsense. KSW is a symptom, not a solution of Scientology or anything else – it’s pure Hubbard!. Deny people the right to think and act for themselves is fight’n talk. It all caught up with him and it will and is doing the same to Miscavige. People like Cruise are just self-important idiots with lots of money and will have to live with themselves in the aftermath, no amount of $ will cushion that fall. Travolta I was hoping wasn’t so bad but his recent ‘side show’ in Clearwater sunk his boat imo. He’s just as screwy as Cruise and deserves everything he gets when Scientology goes down the toilet.
It seems like going into seclusion by reason of feeling like you’re being hated is some sort of Scientology process.
Inside an auditing session:
Auditor: Spot an SP.
PC: Okay.
Auditor: Spot another SP.
PC: Yes.
Auditor: Spot another SP.
PC: Alright.
After three hours, PC begins to dope off.
Auditor: Did something occur?
PC: It just seems the whole planet is crawling with them everywhere I look!
Auditor: Your needle is floating.
Go to the top of the Scio class and get a silver star on your cert for that process!
“We will not speculate here …..”
You will one day have listened to my 4000 reel-to-reels, 300 books and make it to full OT then you too will understand…..
In the inimitable words of my great grandmother, Oy vey!
The true result of the having people follow pointless commands for hours (look at that bottle, walk over to that wall, etc.) until it doesn’t bother them anymore is to get the scientologist to believe that when someone gives them an order, and they decide to follow that order, they are being self-determined. From this point, when the scientologist is confronted with a command they don’t want to follow (most commonly, hand over more money than they should), they will convince themselves that this is something they want to do and then do it, telling themselves that they are being self-determined, and failing to recognize the fact that they are a trained circus animal.
TC, leave out the word Scientology and scientologist and you have the perfect description of every cult, ultra orthodox religion and many political organizations.
Excellent article and the perfect entré into opening the eyes of a programmed cult member aka(scientologist).
TC at the rate you are going you will have a great book on how to look at Scientology with critical thinking. You help focus each issue that makes Scientology such a toxic cult.
Thanks for your persistence and creativity in putting together these articles for Mike.
Rock on!
Thanks, BK.
What is the difference between “beingness” and “havingness”…which, as far as I can tell, aren’t real words…
Thank you
“Beingness”, by my reckoning, is a feelingness about your or another person’s identityness. “Havingness” is also a feelingness. It is where you experience a pleasingness from your lookingness at things. Both terms imply a grantingness or an allowingness or a not-grantingness or a not-allowingness.
I’m glad I could clarify this for you.
Roger: Much thankingness for your clarifyingness.
All this readingness and writingness enhances my blogingness.
To Terra & MM…
LOL! All the “ness” nonsense cracks me right the hell up. It’s so absurd that Hubbard made up those silly words.
Roger and Terra, you guys cracked me up!
Why that old fart (LRH) couldn’t use proper words beats the hell out of me. I guess he just wanted to solidify the cult aspect of his “religion”.
Is surfingness a real word? Damn right it is! Why? Because I say so!
If the cult can make up words, I can too!
You’re so right Dudeness.
It could be simply discounted as poor writing. Or it could be seen as a part of a comprehensive effort to isolate people in a cocoon where you exercise command intention over their relationships with family/friends, their sexuality, spirituality, time, finances, interpretation of ethics and even their ability to communicate with those “outsiders” that you so painstakingly warn them about.
Beingness is the personality you adopt for a particular role, you could look at someone and say they have the beingness of a parent or that of their chosen career path, eg the typical government employee.
Havingness has several descriptions, the one I remember is the ability to reach and not be prevented from reaching. For example you can have low havingness if your standards are not very high, or if you are not prepared to rip off your ‘friends’ My experience was the scns universally over charge for their services without the slightest pang of guilt.
Havingness is basically “self-esteem”?
Beingness is your demeanor?
When I spill my soup and the dog has toppled over the dining room table, it’s a lot of having-mess. Hope this helps.
Wow. You nailed it once again.
Did anyone see the episode on Investigation Discovery called: Scientology A Students Descent?
I think its high time the differentiation between Scientology being applied outside by those because of suppression within.Theirs good getting done still outside of the suppressive church under the dictator
scientology is a destructive practice invented to create a cult. It is a scam inside or outside of the “church”. If you want to promote that it “works”, bring proof.
Hmmmm…just what kind of “proof” do you demand? How can one prove *any* belief system? And who is it who demands it? What are *they* willing to prove?
Strictly, I don’t think one “proves” a belief system as a whole, but individual beliefs can be examined to see whether they have observable consequences, and those which do can be tested.
For example, the state of “clear” was at one time claimed to provide “perfect recall”, but an attempt to demonstrate this publicly ended in failure. (And per Wikipedia, Hubbard explained the failure was due to his own use of the word “now” – contradicting the claim that everything he said was carefully considered!) This failure occurred well over sixty years ago, and there has been no success since.
As far as who demands proof – well, I must admit that some of them may be doing so disingenuously, as you imply, planning to ignore the answer. But I would suggest many are in fact prepared to consider evidence.
Can you identify anything from Scientology which (1) is observable, (2) can only be explained by Scientology, and (3) has actually been observed?
You don’t know what scientific proof is? That explains your inability to pull away from a dangerous cult.
Terra makes the point here that there is definitely something valuable to be had from scientology, the mistake we all made was sticking around thinking there would be so much more to come. A bit like hanging onto a stock which has made you lots of money thinking it will continue to climb, only to see it nose dive with all your money tied up in it, except in scn its your life tied to it. Scientology wasn’t useless to me, not getting out many years before I did was a mistake though, and I don’t like the fact that it instills hidden thought processes that you find yourself using sometimes before you realize what you are even doing.
Well said. There really is no end. There’s always more to come. Even if you’re OT8, there’s the promise of OT9 and 10. Tragic.
The issue I increasingly have with talking about any possible benefits from Dianetics and Scientology, is that we don’t know what the downsides or dangers really are – or at what point they start becoming a real problem, whether it is early on or only later.
To being with, Scientology not only selects for those for whom its processes work – with the least likely to benefit weeded out by initial testing and processing – but tends to quickly eliminated anyone for whom it is not working or is even causing problems, so those who stay in for any length of time are getting a selective and even warped impression of the effects on people in general. An exaggerated analogy would be attributing the development of looks and intelligence themselves, to being in a high-level beauty pageant, when obviously what is going is an extended process of selection for certain qualities that eliminates many people even from consideration.
Then, Hubbard and Scientology have, completely irresponsibly, and totally in breech of every notion of actual science, failed to do any sort of proper follow-up on the results of their processing – and I even suspect this is because Hubbard knew from what he observed, that any actual accounting would not make him and his work look so good in the balance, particularly when some largely hidden bad outcomes were accounted for. The independent Scientology community has also followed in Hubbard’s sloppy failing footsteps, with the possible exception of Sarge Gerbode and his work with Traumatic Incident Reduction (TIR) – the results of which suggest, that to get to the real effective elements, the Dianetics and Scientology have to be taken out of Hubbard’s work, reducing it to a simple combination of techniques from the sources that Hubbard plagiarized (along with some updates from modern therapies), to end up with anything workable and safe.
I have to conclude that until some proper research is finally done after more than half a century, proving that even the lower levels of Dianetics and Scientology processing are reasonably safe for anyone who might try them, given all that is known about the damage they can eventually cause, they have to be presumed to have harms outweighing any benefits even at the lowest levels. And it’s irresponsible to even talk about possible benefits, given the possibility that someone might get involved and instead experience the harms.
Finally, essentially all the studies ever done, show that Dianetics and Scientology are based on flawed premises, and provide no benefits. It can be argued that those studies are old or flawed – but then it’s up to proponents to do some new, proper research and disprove them! Until or unless the CofS and the independents get their act together and take some responsibility for ensuring results and safety, Scientology remains a disproven pseudo-science, discredited by evidence of its harms that have been accepted in court.
?
This post of PeaceMaker’s should be bronzed and put into the glossary here.
Hi Hadely, Im fairly new here, and never in, but I’m learning to read carefully, so I can determine whether it’s the CO$, or Independent being referred to.
What good is being done, outside COS? Are folks charged for books and auditing? Does Indy follow all of Hubbards policies and teachings?
Definitely so.
I’ve wondered about attacking critics (of Hubbard), fair game, and denying critical thoughts of Hubbard, during auditing or elsewhere.
Wow.. Looong sentence!