“We are actually running governments!”
It is astonishing the level of self-delusion that these people engage in.
It would be VERY interesting to find out which government(s) they are referring to and check in with them — “Are you aware that you are being “run” by scientology?”
More IAS — Give us your money NOW
It just never ends.
But what an amazing feat — with 2000 public on lines and 12,000 local scientologists, they have managed to pull together 69 donations “that I can document.”
As always to celebrate such milestones we, the Flag OT Committee, the most upstat OT Committee on the planet, will want to play a game where everyone wins to help raise funds to safeguard and advance our religion. So in the spirit of play, the game has been launched and many are playing big! The Game Is- It’s 200 individual donations to the IAS in the next two weeks and a higher than last game amount raised (and we did really well on our last game in July). As of right now we have 69 individual donations that I can document. I know that there are more, you just need to let me know about them. That means we need to donate and get others to donate to the IAS, lots of people to donate. By really getting this flow of the number of individual donations it will help tremendously in getting a great amount of funds raised. And remember we are on the Flag Org board under Division 6C so we want to especially flow donations to these staff members and help them get their quota. You can give your donations to any Sea Org member or turn it directly in to the IAS but we do want to help get Div 6C quota too! Please write on the donation form “Flag OTC” or “Division 6C”. So the game is afoot, start now by donating to the IAS and get others to. Remember to send me an email to me letting me know who you gave it to and how much and report it on the weekly stat form also. Here’s to Highest Ever number of individuals donating to the IAS produced by Flag OT Committee members and the Highest Ever Funds Raised!!!!! Debbie Sharp Flag OT Committee PES
We are Clearing the Planet!
6 Clears in one week. HIGHEST EVER!!!
Wow, how impressive (These must be the ones that LA Org couldn’t make).
At this astonishing rate of 6 per week or 300 per year, they should have everyone in a 2 block radius of ASHO done within 5 years. Wow! And everyone in the LA area within 40,000 years. A mere speck in the billion year contract.
Now that’s worth putting out a promo piece about.
More fun from the South Coast Mission
They have provided a lot of entertainment recently. I just couldn’t pass by the tag line on their Facebook Page.
I wonder what they think when they go to the IAS Event and hear Dear Leader rant about “Cleaning up the field of Mental Health”?
Portland is smoking
Not sure WHAT they are smoking…
I guess nobody has told them LA Org and Tampa Org have been promoting that THEY are the first SH Ideal Orgs in this “new Golden Age.” Or that there are about 20 other orgs that have been declared “SH Size” at various times.
And let’s not forget the reports we have had from people who have toured the “ideal” org recently and found it to be as empty as a Swedish nude swimming beach in February.
Flag OTC gone high tech (or underground):
I havent had time to post anything about this, so am putting it here. For anyone who wondered about the minutes from the Flag OTC, they could never plug the leak, so resorted to sending out these “Messages of the Week.”
It’s great because they are able to include a picture of Dear Leader each week to keep their brownie points accumulating.
They have earned a new moniker: “Only Toadies Committee.”
Plagiarism Alert
Someone needs to tell the copywriters to come up with something new.
This is the SAME copy they used to try and convince everyone the INTERNET is what is important and to buy special edition red, blue and green emeters to fund KCET.
Now they are using their dubious stats to “prove” that it’s really TV.
Birthday Corn
The Royal Governor of the Vast Valley Territory?
And it’s surely going to her head. Nancy Cartwright, channeling L. Ron Hubbard when asked what she most wanted for her birthday replied “an Ideal Valley Org.” Now if she was really on source, she would have gotten the quote exactly correct. Here is what L. Ron Hubbard said: Birthday games began long ago when someone said, “What would you like from management for your next birthday?” Now, you’ve all heard such questions. The normal answer is “A tie,” or maybe, “A chocolate cake.” Well, I surprised them. I said, “5X the stats!”
But good news, they are doing it for Bart….
Respecting beliefs of others
No comment. None needed.
NY Org
This was sent in by a Special Correspondent.
This crappy mailing was a photocopy on cheap paper — even the signature. They just added the scribble at the bottom to “personalize” it.
This was sent to someone in Los Angeles….
As the recipient so appropriately noted: “This is the largest city and financial capital of the richest country in the world. You’d think they have other things to do.
All I can say is: Absolutely. I’ll be sending all my wealthy Wall Street friends right over.”
Regraded Being
We have a double feature from Regraded Being this week. That RB is a busy beaver.
First, a new promotional item.
And the traditional comic strip:
That TV looks like it is from the 70’s.
I wonder…has anyone told the CoS that coming to TV is a tad late to the party?
A few “Scientology Logics” …
If it is true that …
SO members are forbidden to watch TV …
LRH says TV watching is hypnotic …
Scientology wakes people up from their hypnotic trance …
TV stations are moving over to online broadcasting services because people prefer the internet …
it logically follows that
we need to build our own TV station
and hypnotize people.
If you had a cognition, see the Examiner, write a success story, thank COB, and donate.
I think that person misheard, the actual quote was, “we are running from governments.”
According to the hours watched list, by age, I should be worshipping the glass-eyed god for 42 hours a week. Before I literally put my idiot box on the nature strip outside (it sat there for two days before someone grabbed it) two plus years ago my viewing was down to one hour a week. Do I miss television? Short answer: NO.
The Church of Miscavige, Maniac is becoming more and more desperate and their grovelling to the rusted-on and robots are pathetic.
The most disturbing thing I found in all these stories (well, they are all horrendous – not detracting from them) is the seeming fact that all staff have some sort of damn quota for IAS and I suppose anything else that they can think up. Firstly as we all know it is against Policy (donations – Org Series 4 as I recall) and secondly the good old “Job Endangerment Reports” PL or whatever it was called – this crap is not their hat. Such giving of quotas for these things must be a nightmare for the poor staff still beavering away, plus I reckon they are not allowed to go home or sleep etc. until the quotas are made.
Thing is I am not totally sure that if the (general – i.e. not Reg or BSO) staff member gets a donation from some schmuck that he/she then gets the 10% commission in his pay and then if so, agrees with and goes along with the whole scam as that is the only way he can survive financially (if he/she does survive that is). This of course, if so, is yet another very clever means of destroying training and thus auditing as all the efforts of the staff go into making enough to buy them cigarettes and hot dogs for that week, never mind that their post may be D of P of D of T and that by doing their post properly might have made them enough money – to not bother with having to get the 10% commissions! And so it goes – on and on. This 10% commissions thing, initially for Regs and BSOs, was introduced in the early 1980s and in my opinion is one of the biggest foot bullets “Scientology” or some rascal made. It corrupted the scene grossly and led to further corruption in later years with IAS and Idle Org and all the other donations. It shifted the emphasis from product to simply getting the dough.
In the photo of the 3 “Clears” getting their certs at ASHO it looks like there are only 2 public in the audience. All the rest are staff. Where are the public?
LOFL, War Horse!
And your right, I wouldn’t put it past them!
It’s funny reading the church’s data on TV. It’s like they just discovered TV. Once again the church is a day late and a dollar short; traditional TV is evolving into online broadcasting services. Perfect time to open up a TV station. Doh!
I also question their TV watching stats (er…well, any stats presented). I would have expected online and mobile usage to be on the rise, and TV on the decline. But what do I know.
I’m still confused – what does Scientology do with money again?
Launders it.
You know how their spelling is on those promo flyers.
They’re probably ruining actual governments.
Upcoming Valley promo pieces:
1) Nancy won’t always be here. The stars glisten from a Network light-years away.
2) Nancy’s purpose is to lift the San Fernando Valley out of the mud it thinks conceived it… It’s a star-high goal. But she thinks it’s your goal too.
3) Whenever you find yourself wondering how much to donate to the Valley Ideal Org, you should ask this one time-honored question:
“What would Nancy do?”
4) Who IS Miss Cartwright?
Find out in her latest book, “Hymn of Nancy”.
Opening line: “Am I Nancia?”
A stretch? Give it six months.
The LRH “datum” that TV is hypnotic was not about television content, but rather TV tubes. At the time of his warning “boob tubes” were actually cathode ray tubes. It was LRH’s contention that emissions of cathode ray tubes are hypnotic. Flat screen TVs do not employ this technology so in and of themselves are not hypnotic per LRH’s description. It always used to amuse me, from the late 70s on, when stick-up-the-ass Scientologists virtuously let it be known they shunned television and only used their TV sets to watch videos. For me LRH’s warning was simply his opinion.
Right-on Kathy these stick-up Scientologists can only know data, never the condition of existence.
Let me guess…. the 3 clears that were made in one day were made either late Weds night, or Thurs before 2.00
Very accurate cartoon. Rex Fowler was on OT 7 and had his own business
until the vultures smelled money.Rex emptied the company assets into cash for the
IAS for the made up fake ploy of saving Africa. Outcome was he murdered his CFO
and failed suicide. Now doing life in Prison. David Miscavige got all his money.
PTS/SP course of memorizing Scientology holidays is like memorizing
National Baloney Day to become Mr. Universe.
Nice picture of Daphna Hernandez BTW.
I have trouble remembering the date of International Talk Like a Pirate Day. How am I supposed to remember National Bologna Day, and can I have mine on white with mustard?
Well, if they are running governments, what the hell are they so proud about ? What a bunch of loons.
“Methinks the well is running dry.”
We’re tracking, Hallie Jane. I was just thinking, or cogging, if you will, that with IAS money being the principal source of income now for the Church of Scientology, this fundraising has to be ongoing. Whereas in former times it was once or twice a year, now, with very little auditing or training being sold in orgs, this is where the income comes from – this, and Ideal Morgue fundraising, of course, and they can’t even keep it, or possibly only a small portion of it. Must be a nightmare for public and staff alike. Even more for staff, I would think, in that public have ways of dodging and hiding, or showing up and flowing $20 or something. But the staffs not only have to be IAS shills but they’re also going to get grief for not doing their own hats on their own posts. AND, on top of all this, they have to do their PR mock-up that everything is GREAT. Sooo glad I didn’t join staff. Poor guys.
I get a completely different picture when you say “cogging” 😛
Incidentally, I think I’ll be going back to the church. I’ve always wanted my own government to run – you know, in a kind of “if I was king of the world” way.
$19.57. That’s what they will be flowing this week. Their own promo made it ok. Sheesh. How stoopid can you be.
Summary:
LRH has got new initials and modern lower case, and will henceforth be referred to as etc.
KCET: You need a TV studio to reach the Internet? Whatever…
Nany Cartwright is being primed to become Her Royal Governor of the Vast Scientology Empire (hah! fat chance!)
Oxymoron alert: Scientology parent
NY Org: They’ll be sending out their letters on the final scraps of toilet paper soon.
Regraded Being: ROFLMAO!! Has quickly become one of my favourite comic strips! (What does the fine print say about OSA at the very bottom of the sex therapist’s sign?
“All counseling session records are strictly confidential and kept secure with OSA.”
That’s a relief! And here’s Laura claiming anyone can read them!
Ha! I like the first one:
“I really want to thank COB, and yeah staff or whatever, but really just COB.”
It’s mandatory. If DAVID MISCAVAGE is not acknowledged as the Master of the Universe, you know someone is headed for the RPF. Tiny body with a humongous ego…
Taken from the book Manson
The Life and Times of Charles Mason
by Jeff Guinn
The constant danger for gurus is that they must keep producing new wonders for their followers. They can’t let the act get stale or seem to be wrong about something or, worst of all, fail publicly.
Nice, 0.0! Scientology is following that script exactly.
Hilarious comics RB! I love the sex therapy shop, that masturbation is SUCH a problem! That’s what you get when adolescents are running the place, immature sexual attitudes. And there’s a party where we get to be queens or princesses!!!!! It’s only money, you don’t even have to find a prince. They expect only 200 ias donations in two weeks?! This is a striking outpoint in contrast to the tens of thousands of Scngsts that are supposed to be still in the rcs. Me thinks the well is running dry.
As for the clears my clear number was in the 9000s in the late ’70’s. I figured out my clear number compared to clear number one and if the clear number climbed at a steady rate per day, there were 714 clears per year between the first clear and when I became clear. I know it didn’t, so there were times when more than 3 clears per day and 6 clears per week were commonplace. I remember clear was almost passe about the time I became clear, just another small step towards OT. Can’t help but be a little skeptical and wonder what those 6 clears’ first clear number was, one giant leap backwards for the RCOS.
Not only did I never receive my declare, but I also didn’t receive my clear cert. (I guess the staff at SFO always “knew” I was a SP, after all, they are so OT.)
What a RIP…
Oh well, at least I escaped before anyone could force me to redo any/everything…
Sorry guys, but these folks are NUTS.
“Unfortunate, too, that so many grown-ups lack any fundamental understanding of what the word respect even means.and how it might apply to the things about our lives we hold most dear –“
WTF? How could they even manage to compose that sentence? I guess the same way they have CCHR. Flat out flabbergasted.
Great selection today Mike!
Running governments… give me a break. More like running from governments like France.
And awesome work from Regraded Being – Golden Age of Storage LOL!
Scientology TV .. what is that? You can look there all the theta movies 24 hours a day .. like Battlefield Earth .. and in a 5 Minute interruption you see always an exploding vulcano ..
Six clears in a week? Easy as pie.
Just take six people who have been undeclared clear and change your mind and give ’em a new cert. Don’t worry, you can always take it away again next week.
The world record, from what I’ve heard, is FIVE times from clear to un to clear to un…
The organization itself is sociopathic. It has no conscience. It insists on that attitude from each and every staff member. It inflicts that attitude on each and every victim hapless enough to buy into their bull.
Just what I was thinking, Les. It just goes on and on like that. If all of a sudden there is OBVIOUS proof that “they” aren’t controlling gov’t or not expanding, the lie is just changed around and those stll in buy it or ignore it out of fear. The church will lie its way to “The SP’s won.”
“Running governments now”…OMG, half-rations of Koolaid for you for the next 2 weeks, lady – doctor’s orders.
“WiseGuys Consulting”…”The Ideal Orgasm”…Regraded, thanks for these and other much-needed chuckle-inducers.
Oh, and how helpful to be informed as to what Royal Governer truly wants for her Birthday! That’s one less thing I have to worry about.
New York Org has to be desperate to be outflowing to out of state areas for PCs when it is sitting in the middle of one of the most trafficked areas in the world in a city of 9 million people. With foot traffic in the hundreds of thousands within a 4 block radius of this Ideal Org I find passing strange they’re not being overflowing with PCs. What happened to “Build it and they will come”? Not so much, eh?
The photo of the 3 Clears at ASHO…about 95% of the audience are staff members. Only a very small handful are public.
Only 3 new clears, the others must have been retreads that are doing ‘clear’ for the 3rd or more times. Damn those semicolons. Great snark from the commenteers today. The WISEGUYS comic is hilarious and all too true to life.
With all those printing abilities, why can’t the CO$ actually produce a spelling and grammar correct ‘brochure’? I look forward to their TV station doing closed captioning in the worst possible way. I expect to see something like Monty Python’s Hungarian Phrase Book.
I am sure Scientologists feel that they are running governments that are paranoid like Scientology itself.
Scientology does seem to reflect the increasing paranoia afflicting USA as a whole.
Compare USA government to Canadian Government and you may appreciate this point.
That antiquated TV in the promo piece reminds me of the old TV’s that were confiscated in the 80’s at the Sea Org bases. The Wut?! reason given was because we didn’t spend enough face time with our fellow staff members in our “free time”. That one pricked more bubbles that management ever realized.
Hey wait a minute – that IS my TV!
Well, that may have been the reason you were told, but the reasoning was based on an LRH datum that TV is hypnotic and creates zombies who are incapable of communicating.
Honestly, I think a dose of reality from TV would do SO members a world of good. Perhaps they might get some reality on the world.
You know, Mike, when I was on staff, one of the mission staff came over to my home in Kailua. I had a TV and he immediately sat down and started watching it. I mentioned that we needed to head back but he REALLY wanted to stay and watch TV. You see, they didn’t have it in the house he and 8 others shared. He was just fascinated by it. The things we take for granted..
True, but if they actually would be shown some TV it would probably be supervised by ethics officers and a nice selection of bad news would show that depicted the world in total chaos …. and (many) hypnotized SO members would happily go back to their little “island of sanity” – isn’t it cozy in our bunk beds …
“a nice selection of bad news would show that depicted the world in total chaos…” You’re right on the money, George! They want ALL staff to be afraid of the world around them. What a way to live!
Yes, I remember that one too. when I asked to see the order, I think it was an LRH Advice claiming it was just issued based on a recent PAC survey. It was handed to me by a CMO staff. I do remember additionally reading the hynoptic zombie warning. Honestly don’t remember if this was included in this advice or if it was a separate issue. What I remember most is that the in-the-toilet stats at that time quickly got flushed to new bottoms shortly after this madness, and the number of staff leaving through the crack soon opened up to a double wide exit.
When I was on staff at Flag, there were a bunch of us South Africans living in one apartment. We had a little portable TV and watched it every spare moment we had. If we heard footsteps coming up the stairs we would switch off and throw a blanket over the tv in case it was someone who would rat us out 🙂
South Africans are not that good about following senseless orders. We also had cars and drove without doing car school.
If they now believe they are actually running governments they must no longer believe in separation of church and state. Henceforth, it must be OK for some governments to run their church.
if there is no separation of church and state and they are running governments, then don’t they lose their tax exempt status?
Nice haul this week, Mike!
I’m still in love with the idea of Scientology discovering television. Everyone’s watching it! There are TVs in every home!
The plagiarized copy is icing on the cake. What’s so awesome about this, I think, is that it could have been plagiarized from LIFE magazine in 1963. You could toss this flier onto a coffee table on the set of Mad Men, season 2 — with a story line involving the JFK assassination — and it wouldn’t look at all anachronistic. “Planetary Dissemination” would even be a cool-sounding phrase.
If this is the direction Scientology is heading, I can “dig it,” as the kids say. Maybe next we’ll hear that e-meters are made with real transistors. No tubes!
Well, it was a logical next step after investing tens of millions in establishing an “international dissemination center” printing plant to produce magazines and fliers (don’t tell anyone, but they have a few of these “international dissemination centers — Golden Era, Bridge Publication, New Era Publications, THE printing plant and no KCET).
Next year will be the MONUMENTAL planet and universe changing announcement that will turn your entire time track upside down — the new, state-of-the art internet interactive MySpace platform for all scientologists to catch the wave of the interwebs using Golden Age of Miscavige tech to set the trends for this and every other society leading the way to planetary clearing not to mention busting through the roof of Target Two.
Imagine how many people you could reach with papyrus scrolls! Have the works of LRH been translation to Egyptian hieroglyphics yet? Next up: cuneiform tablets.
hgc10, that is a brilliant idea! You know, this way we could reach egyptologists and archaeologists, who usually have their noses buried deep in mud or dusty books filled with useless data, and who otherwise would never have a chance to find out about the incredible breakthrough of the semicolon!
🙂 Classic.
Heh – Golden Age of Miscavige – GAM
@richardgrant The TV set they used in the promo would be the TV set that was used to watch the JFK assassination in 1963. Seriously – when was the last time you saw a TV set that looked like that?
They should’ve had the old test pattern with the Indian Head on the TV.
That’s what I was thinking too, Valerie. But, as I’ve said before, they seem stuck in the 50s or early 60s. What’s that thing they talk about? Present time? Well, they’re not in it.
And, yes, TDA, the Indian Head would have been classic!
You are so right!
I knew if I read far enough that someone else would point out that no one has seen a TV like that in at least a decade.
Way to go, guys…always in PT.
Love the old TV set they choose for a “TV” – shows where they are stuck at
You know, George, SO are not allowed to watch TV. I’m sure DAVID MISCAVAGE has the latest and greatest flat screen in all his homes. So using that TV from many decades ago is very appropriate. When Sea Orgers saw the add, they probably thought that TV was state-of-the-art!
Those cartoons by Regraded Being are so true. And I loved the logo for Wise Guys, bats and all. What a great cartoon.
LOL…… Great cartoon! Too bad it is the total truth. I have a story which has yet to be broken about this. Fortunately it did not involve me or my business. Watch for it in December!
Waiting with bated breath Coop… I am sure it will be a doozie.
Gosh, Coop! I don’t know if I can wait that long! What a tease you are!
Anticipation is one of the truly great ’emotions?’) to experience …… especially when you know you will like it!
Come to think of it, I have two true stories I will be relating to all you good bloggers here! 🙂
My anticipation is through the roof, Coop! I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight! I just know you’re going to unleash a blockbuster of a story! Ummm, I mean stories…
Coop,
I thought you would highly appreciate the WISEGUY’S wise words: “Does your 2D or business partner protest your donations? We’ll make you right and them wrong, EVERY TIME!”
Greta
Coop, I’m just using patented DGAFAY tech when it comes to your upcoming announcement. I’m sure it will be nothing ;0) tell me please please please erm I mean I could care less what you have to say.
Who is “Adam Hubbard”? is he an LRH descendant? He is listed as the Field Control Secretary for the NY Org Day in the letter from “John Buchanan”
No relation. Not an uncommon name, Hubbard.
I am so done with Scientology.
+ 1!
+1 ! And it feels soooooooo good.
Doesn’t it though, Coop! One of THE best days of my life was leaving staff in Hawai’i. I started bar tending just down from the cult’s mission. What a difference from being on staff where everyone is spying on everyone else. Going from staff, let alone the SO, to not being on staff is like night and day. It was suddenly pure freedom! I was single and very ready to mingle. And…I did just that! Ahhhhh, Hawai’i in my youth…
You certainly made the right choice OSD. Nice to have a life to live.
Amen
I really enjoy your Thursday funnies Mike – thanks. And as for your comic strip, ROTFL. Sadly, it skates so close to the truth as to be quite scary. We are busy putting down a very similar situation now on a property we jointly own with an OT8 – I am refusing to sell at his behest, he wants the hell out of dodge as he is “still connected” and must be going out of his mind with fear of what will befall him. (We used to be his family not too long ago). Ah well……………………
Maybe he should retrain the PTS/SP course so he can figure out how to confront and shatter suppression? It’s amazing how the supposed masters of handling suppression are SO terrified of anyone even labeled suppressive (of course, in the last 20 yers there have been probably been NO actual SP’s declared by the church).
ANd many of them are “OT’s” who are “fully at cause over life.”
It is perhaps the single best demonstration to the world of the efficacy of this “tech.”
+100 – 🙂
Confront & shatter suppression? Can’t confront & shatter a teacup. That’s my new mantra.
You got that right, Mike! Church of the Cosmic Delusion. Not sure how effective the PTS/SP course is, though. When SPs show up, everyone tends to run away. Maybe they’ll come up with a course on running away Ideally…
Perhaps that is what the Cause Resurgence (Running) Program is??? Practice running away effectively and causatively.
Shelley, Yes, cause over life means running with your tail between your legs when you see a “Special Person.” As they hide behind the bush they peak over and say, “Yes! I really confronted and shattered that SP by running away! Why look at him, he’s so caved in he can hardly walk into the store.” The OT waits in their car to see the “SP” when he comes out of the store, and then spots him with lots of grocery bags (cuz he is flourishing and prospering) and then the OT ducks down when the SP looks over, waves and smiles at him.
Shelley, Re the deal you are in with the OT VIII, hold to your guns and don’t sell at the wrong time just because they are frantic to disconnect. And if they give you crap, take them to court and let the truth come out on public record.
Cindy, smiling and waving at people still in as an SP is one of the highlights of my day! Especially when they start to run away. I run after them! I know, I know. I’m a bad boy…
I’ve been through that, someone who didn’t want to sell a parcel that I had an interest in. If you have 50+% ownership of the property in question, I would let any complaint he has go in one ear and out the other, if you’re unfamiliar with that kind of tech. 🙂