We havent had Thursday Funnies for a few weeks now. With a break from new Aftermath shows there are no new scientology idiotic responses to dissect.
Some of these funnies are a little old, but they are still fun…
Gathering of the Brave?
Or at least those with 150 pounds burning a hole in their pocket.
“Well-known authorities”?
Do tell…
Turning the tide…
Really? How?
The Largest Ideal Org in the US
Still pushing how many empty square feet they have as the only thing they’ve got going for them…
Really milking it…
The world “humanitarian” day isn’t really something scientology should be crowing about.
The Wichita/TC Alliance?
Money-making makes for strange bedfellows
The Bard of the EUS is at it again…
What does it take?
Old people in togas apparently…
Game of dones?
What have they gotten done?
It’s everywhere…
YNOTs?
Good question. Wonder if this “mind-blowing” event answered it?
Confront and Shatter Suppression Kings
These are the two who ran away and hid when they saw I was on the same plane flying back to Tampa…
Tom? Tom?
Where are those 2 billion people you promised us?
Legendary?
Never heard of him…
This is good?
They made a promotional piece out of this…
Yeah, college is a waste of 4 years
Money, money, money…
Flag bs
It’s all beach time and hanging in the sun…
The future Canada AO
Yeah, well it’s been sitting empty for a decade or more. So what’s there to celebrate?
Texas Rebel Alliance?
No scientologist, by definition, is a rebel.
Yeah, stuck in that moment forever
This sounds exciting…
More money, money, money
More, more money, money, money
What else is new?
Do something about the world?
And exactly what is that?
Still running this bs
Atlanta has not grown 1X
Wow
Laura Malm was in the SO half a century ago! Just finished the SRD? Now that is rocketing up the bridge…
Another “about to change”…
Does anyone REALLY buy this? Or do they just play along so as not to be sec checked
Not a mention of scientology
Help civilization triumph…
Believe it or not, there are those who believe with utter conviction they are doing this.
They’re making a new world
And they believe that too…
Free T Shirts
For the photo op…
No comment…
Hello again.
Went on line and found an very, very, good video series by a woman named: Karen de la Carriere. Karen was an level XII in the cult, and a member for 35 years. Her husband, Herber Jentzsch was president of “Church of Scientology International. He has since been a captive of DM and has not been seen since I believe 2007. There are pictures of DM giving her husband a coat for his birthday, but still had him imprisoned.
Mike, you know this woman, and she has mentioned and shown this blog several times in her talks. Great stuff.
You can see her videos by going to YouTube.
Her e-mail is: [email protected]
I bet you watch more than just one episode. Enjoy.
Lance Caldwell.
Sure he can. And did! LOL
I no longer recognize scientology’s “right” to make me go to events, participate, or give money over.
This is glorious.
When I was still with the program I went to all kinds of events I’d rather have skipped. I skipped what I could, but my underlying desire to achieve all the promises helped me mold my own mind into agreement so that I could hopefully get the gains I was after.
So even if you see the wrongness of the Ideal Org program, you keep it to yourself and do what you can to keep up appearances, not rock the boat, and keep your mind right so as to not damage your bridge.
You give money to your own bridge, and this helps get you up the bridge to hopefully get the magical awareness and ability, and can placate the regges who want dollars as straight donos for IAS, CCHR, Ideal Orgs, LRH Hall, Ad nauseam.
I had a million tricks in my bag to keep myself focused right, to play nice, and to keep my own sense of personal control. I SAW others give money they couldn’t afford, give to dono and not have any left for bridge, who gave up all free time to staff or FSM/OT committee activities.
I used to be pleased with how I was able to duck and weave and keep my integrity while also being a “good scio” and moving up the bridge, helping as I saw fit and not dictated by less trained/audited zealots under stat push pressure.
…
now
I don’t have to work hard at any of it. No more tricks, no more hopes, no more molding my mind.
…
Now I do what I want.
There is such a gulf of difference I couldn’t even begin to describe it.
….
Thanks for the Thursday Funnies, reminding me of how far I’ve come so far, and what I have gained.
“I no longer recognize Scientology’s “right” to make me go to events, participate or give money over. This is glorious.”
Yes, indeedy it is, secret! VERY well decided. You’re making my day.
Secret has busted out. Yey! One more soul liberated.
Reading through the event promos and silly guest speaker invitationals, I am struck by one thing: just how absolutely boring scientology is.
Don’t mind the crickets chirping.
Oh, and to the last one out (Dave), don’t forget to turn the light off.
Propaganda and more propaganda. Fortunately the truth about Scientology is becoming ubiquitous. And I see not let up on that until the criminal organization is defanged.
Beach time at Saint Hill.
I had no idea that East Grinstead was on the British coast.
The Texas Rebel Alliance.
Well, Texas is considering seceding from the United States so……..
These all make me vomit…
Sea OrgWuss is right lol…
Hey Mike hey I wondered how Sct feel about there so High standards on Drugs & Misc other things yet T.C dose movies w the very things they appose Isn’t that a double standard yet wait I think I know the answer from the pattern they seem to have & they swear like the sailors they are,were WTH are they doing wait I see pretty much Nothing but trouble No but really there standards they put on there ppl yet doing Movies is okay I don’t get it,Love yah Mike & all U survivors…
The poor young lady who has been coerced into joining the cult with the classic black and white thinking:
“I DID IT BECAUSE I WANTED A CAREER WHERE I COULD HELP OTHERS WITHOUT HAVING TO STUDY FOR 4 YEARS JUST TO GET STARTED.”
Really??!!!!!! Since when are those two concepts mutually exclusive? Only when you have uneducated ‘staff members’ trying to get other people into a mind controlling cult with black and white thinking!
My daughter is one of those who joined the SO at age 16 parroting the same line. I, being the mindfucked wimp I was and not wanting to rock the boat said OK as long as she finishes her high school education and gets a drivers license. I told myself that she wouldn’t like it and would leave. That’s what I wanted to believe.
Six years on and she was still in the SO wanting to help. This time the IAS found out we had a college fund set aside for her and she was convinced that donating it to the IAS would be the greatest good. And she was looking forward to going on stage and being acknowledged for completing her patron status. After the cult had secured her funds, they told her that SO people were not allowed to be publicly acknowledged because it would upset the other SO staff who were less fortunate. So she was snubbed in exchange for giving the IAS her college funds. The IAS and $cientology are a criminal organization.
All I can say about that at this time is that there is one thing the cult has to say about her Dad which I agree with …………………………. He is a fucking idiot! I hope I have learned some small thing in the process of waking up from the mindfuck called $cientology………..scheesch …… it takes some of us a lot of tries to figure it out.
Now she is 35 years old and still in. It has been over five years since she disconnected from her family and I have no idea where she is, where she lives or if she is even still alive. The cult is a very bad group to fall in with.
Yo Dave,
I will never stop telling people the truth about Your cult nor rest until the menace called $cientology is gone. Never, ever relax good buddy!
Your story is sad and Scamology is mind boggling with their never ending evil agendas. I am sorry this has happened to you and your daughter.
This is the tip of the iceberg, CG.
The Dude – so very troubling.
Newcomer —
It just breaks my heart every time I hear another disconnection story. I’m so sorry your daughter hasn’t gotten out yet.
I cannot imagine being away from my son for more than a few days (he’s only 5 yrs old), let alone five years. There are no words to describe the heartache you must feel. Hugs to you.
I’m sorry for the loss of your daughter, but I will pray God opens her eyes, mind, and heart to the evils of Scientology, giving her the courage to leave and find you.
I am so, so sorry for you. It’s like a death in the family. I feel so badly for you.
Wow! What an evil cult. So very sorry for the loss of your daughter and the inevitable heartbreak that disconnection brings.
I am sooooo sorry to hear of your sorrow and struggles. Breaks my heart:(
Newcomer – I hope your daughter is one of the people who get out soon.
That’s our hope for everyone still in the cult, Spike.
Fortunately I don’t have any family in there, Old Surfer Dude, how about you?
Don’t beat yourself up, Newcomer. You weren’t dumb. She was 16, she got it into her head that she wanted to do this. If you had opposed or obstructed her too much she would have resented you and never forgotten it.. You let her go. You didn’t stand in her way. It was what she wanted. You did the right thing.. Basically, you did the only thing you could do. And that ability she has to make decisions for herself is precious. For one reason or another it can get reactivated one day and enable her to leave.. That will of her own – its precious. What got her in will get her out, I’d say.
Silly funnies and silly ads. If only they could see it for themselves. Sad!
I think that in a race between $camology and the atomic bomb the latter would win within a few microseconds.
If I was that eagle I would be searching for the, snort, snort, poet and crapping copiously on their head.
“Game of Dones” – they got the poster done.
Ohio Buckeye Bash – “Cornhole”, that’s where the regges threaten you with a corn cob to make sure you hand over the extra few dollars you have stashed in a place where the sun doesn’t shine.
“Help civilization triumph…”, join $camology and you definitely be crushed down in the mud to grovel at the feet of a little demented madman.
Their continual use of children is seriously creepy.
I REALLY wish they would stop calling it the Santa Barbara org! Are they that geographically challenged??
The new Idle Morgue is in Ventura (where I have lived since 1982) and we are 30 miles south of S.B.
And that building is nowhere near any road or traffic that is used or seen. Except from U.S. Hwy 101 you can see it but it has no signs of it being a Scio building. There is absolutely zero foot or car traffic on that road and it’s next to a small water and bird preserve – which is more like a swamp.
You can bet I will be there protesting the ribbon cutting if that ever happens.
Bottom line, we are Ventura and not Santa Barbara. Quit calling it that you f*cking morons.
‘Bad..’ “Are they that geographically challenged??” Why, yes, they are! The “Cincinnati Org” is in Florence, KY.
I lived in Ohio for 41 years, Ohio Buckeye. If I remember correctly Florence and Cincy are also separated by a mighty river. So many buildings, so little time to remember where they put them. Go Indians !!
Lol!! This is priceless…
Anyone else notice that the jets on the Top Gun poster are MiG-29s? Now why would they put Soviet fighters on a Top Gun poster? Maybe they’re cooler than F-14s?
OMG!!! HIlarious…
THANK you! Probably to avoid copyright problems.
Ok, so the “Ideal Org” has a pic of a police officer in the add? Even if you were a Scientologist and a police officer, are you not obligated by your JOB as a police officer to investigate complaints? Not just a barking dog, but real abuse issues? Sexual assaults? Imprisonment? Kidnapping? and on and on.
My grandfather and father were officers, if I even mentioned a rumor I heard, they would investigate.
Yeah, they are mandated reporters for child abuse just like teachers and doctors. They can face criminal penalties for failing to report abuse.
Breaks my heart to see the little girl in the last image. After watching the Aftermath and seeing how this organization has hurt children, I sure hope her family comes to see the light.
It always kills me when they say “See if you qualify for staff or Sea Org”.
As if they would ever turn anyone down. They love to have slaves.
Unless, of course, that person has ever seen a psychiatrist (oh, the horror!).
Or if perhaps they had watched the Aftermath ………….. then it is a major disqualification.
You qualify if you can exhale on a mirror.
They sure have got their repetitive BS, I mean processing, no, I mean advertising, sheesh, I don’t what to call it anymore, down pat. Same ol, same ol dribble and it’s all about getting your money and/or getting your life. Predicable as the tide chart.
zzzzzzzz…
Sleep tight, I Yawn. I’ll man the lookout post.
Your money of your life? Scientology wants both. UGH!
I missed the Thursday Awkwards. The “old people in togas” pic is truly a gift.
It is a two-bagger. It’s also SO “daffy old people in Florida.” Mike and I excepted, of course.
Whenever I see one of these pix of a small group of Still In oldsters dressed in togas or pirate costumes I get a flash of Miscavige laughing at them over his evening scotch.
What do the shepple think they’re donating $ for ? I think they have all these events so the culties can see all their friends and family and think about what would happen if they left the cult. Of course they’ll be brainwashed more.Events could be fun in the 70’s and 80’s. Don’t think they are anymore.
I can be a Bard, too. Maybe I’ll be accepted as an EUS Eagle.
What does it mean to blow through all stops.
all barriers
all distractions
and the sharpest rocks.
In my socks
or with a fox
with chicken pox.
I think Dr. Seuss
was their muse.
That’s very good, tku.
It did bring to mind (I’m not American, but was brought up on US TV) Dudley Do Right of the American Eagles. His proton energy pill giving him the power of 10 atom bombs for 10 seconds sounds Scientologese too.
I had a misguided youth with far too much free time on my hands, or better stated, I just don’t have any control of what I remember or what puts a smile on my face.
That was Roger Ramjet, not Dudley Do-Right. Different animation company.
OMG! – thanks Espi. I always try to deny I’m losing my mind but keep forgetting why it matters. Goodbye youth… your story is being rewritten by a not so sober ex-Scientologist.
Now, what’s for breakfast?
Seriously horrible poem….I won a literacy award in 3rd grade with a poem like this. Pathetic..
Now now, seriously horrible, is a seriously horrible thing to say to someone. From what height do you view others so called, pathetic efforts? Can you list your most recent literacy award please?
Just back over from MartyWorld, and I’ve noticed a number of people seem to be suffering from PMS (Pernicious Marty Sycophancy). Can any of you tech experts offer a touch assist or something? Maybe it’ll take 3-400 hrs of Scatological processing. Who knows?
I’ve been known assist in creating large smoking holes in the ground. Maybe that’s technical too.
It’s quite incredible how the few remaining Marty supporters still believe his bullshit.
It’s clearly obvious, to anyone with half a brain, that he’s a lying, backstabbing, hypocritical prick of the highest order. Why they continue to deny it is beyond me.
KatherineINCali, the only “followers” Marty has left are those who are pro-pedophilia & pro-human trafficking. In other words, the criminally insane.
Have you ever asked yourself, “Is Mike Rinder on the same flight!”?
Scientology can help you with that.
LOL!!
Interesting and funny and very very sad. All at the same time
“The future is ours”. Yes, creepy cult, and what a dim one it is.
Funny statement that, when you really look at it. According to Hubbard and his philosophy, also his interpretation of Buddhism, that’s all you ever “have” anyway – a future. You know… the old, ‘be it good or bad you’ll be there’ pitch. Sheesh, if I could translate that sort of tactic/strategy into producing a more efficient fishing lure or better flighted golf ball – goodbye money worries forever!
That’s not being in present time.
If a Scientologist was every in present time, they wouldn’t be a Scientologist any longer that’s for sure!
Dave,
If you and your Joker want to take a break from the same old shit, take a look at Tony’s post today–for a real knee-slapping caper. You and your Mark should have been sitting in the bleachers on the Clipper Ship. LOL
I could’ve driven down for that Ohio event. I think it would have left me feeling like I’d been cornholed, whether I’d played the game or not.
Interesting to see all of these posters at once. Wouldn’t it be great to see a graffiti artist change some of the wording to things such as: Come to the Bitchin’ Buckeye Bash ! Live Cornhole demos by D. McSavage. Tour our new building and never see the light of day again ! Build yer own replica of the hole with Legos !
The Hollywood clean up poster has a LAPD seal at the bottom as well as a councilman seal. Money talks, and talks and talks. Minions unite.
Good point Moop.
WOW!! it is all too wonderful, I am convinced, I am selling everything I have, holding up a few banks, and maxing out my credit cards to help pay to save the planet.
Oh, wait that was a nightmare dream. Guess the cult is on its own.
They could have tagged the “Top Gun” ad with “Turning and returning to some secret place and time…” But of course you have to pay to get there.
Lance Caldwell.
Hubbard wrote lies into his philosophy? Who woulda thunk it?
Get out-a-here! Really? Who told you that? 10 million worldwide and growing can’t be wrong.
Another term could be phrased re Scientology I guess, Whales-R-US
(wobbly, blubber minded idiots does come to mind)
Once again I’m going to state the obvious: Membership is mostly made up of older people. But I do feel bad for the kids that get roped in. Especially the ones who get sucked into the SO.
You’re not wrong Dude. Everything about the Cof$ makes you feel bad.
I feel bad for folks from different countries.
My dad used to have a great phrase to describe overblown hyperbole like this.
“Platitudes with Latitude”.
Don’t know the origin, but it certainly applies to all of this egregious nonsense.
“Platitudes with Latitudes.” Sounds like a Jimmy Buffett song.
Poifect!
I’ve so missed Thursday Funnies! They need better quality control/proof readers for their flyers. The font on the top flyer is fairly often used and is difficult to read clearly. The New York flyer says starts at 11am near the top and starts at 11pm near the bottom. The wasting 4 years of study (college) flyer makes them look extra ridiculous! And my favorite is the super ironic Trouble with Finance? seminar! Surely some members have to connect the dots on why they are financially struggling! RIGHT? Please say yes Mike. Your sardonic quips add so much KAW – Keep Aftermath Working!
This is a fascinating development. I’d love to have been a fly on the wall when the dwarf found out about it.
https://tonyortega.org/2017/09/28/aftermath-fan-gets-into-party-at-scientologys-int-base-brings-karen-pressleys-book-along/
Damn!!! I wish I would have known about this event… I would have gone with my copy of “Troublemaker”. I would have written on slips of paper and slipped them into the hands of SO’s offering sanctuary….dang it!
Mike, you may be being a bit too hard on Santa Barbara this week…the promo piece for C-Note Sunday shows a costumed culty cutting a c-note in half…I saw it as truth in advertising, because that is what anybody giving them Ia C-note (as I often used to…CRINGE!) might just as well have done!
Cut it in half, flush it, burn it, throw it out the window on the freeway, actually ALL THESE OPTIONS are better than putting it into the war-chest of the tiny dictator (or that the tiny tator-dic?) well either way, we all know who I mean…;)
You’re a true hero Mike, carry on mate!
-Sneaky Lil Phuq
“There is a key statistic at Flag which quadrupled in 2016”, but we’re not going to tell you what it is. Just like the classic $cientology graphs which never have their axes labelled.
Graham, you can’t leave me hangin’!
Departures stat.
Axes labelled?
Yo, listen up, dude! We’re Scientology! We’re the most theta group on the planet! And we don’t need no stinking wog stuff like Rene Descartes and his Cartesian Coordinate System! Besides, it reveals too much!