Not surprisingly, this week’s funnies are dominated by an apparently endless stream of hype for the “milestone of milestones” – the HSN of cults. Scientology TV
A spiritual awakening?
They actually think canned Infomercial matter could awaken anyone spiritually?
That’s how out of touch they are.
150 “confirmeds”
That means 50 will show up for the biggest, bestest and most important event EVER! In Chicago.
Celebrate with “local non-profits”
WTH Fdn, Narconon, CCHR, Youth for Human Rights and the other scientology front groups wanting your money… What a great way to spend a Saturday evening.
LA’s young, active scientologists…
Not likely to be a packed house.
But very likely to be surrounded by SO recruiters waiting to sink their teeth into anyone silly enough to show up…
Something Can Be Done About It…
We agree on something.
Hope someone goes along and takes some shots of the big, EMPTY, yellow tent…
I am going OT…
And I AM going to be a millionaire, star in the next Star Wars movie and win a Nobel prize.
Hey, you don’t have anyone who has actually GONE OT to promote?
The ideal disease has spread
Now missions are “fundraising” to “go ideal”? Every great fundraising pitch permeates the scientology world faster than the Basics.
But it’s going to take a hell of a lot of tacos…
Kansas City declares victory
Why and over what, nobody seems to quite know.
They’re so coy…
Why not come right out and say what it was? Everyone knew.
That’s a weird response
Scientology TV makes me want to do filing.
And check out the carrot being dangled to participate. An already opened bag of potato chips, some Coke and lemonade and a bowl of Hershey Kiss wrappers. Woohoo. Where do you sign up?
You couldn’t get one of them?
68 million people and you got nada?
But a new building off the beaten path that no tourist is ever going to see will make all the difference right?
Or do you think they will all be tuning into the Cult Shopping Network while they’re at Disneyworld and rush over to find out all about the EMeter?
It’s Command Intention!!!!!
Put enough exclamation points and it guarantees compliance.
Injecting MEST into thought?
Lewis Carroll would be proud of some of these statements.
And this guy thinks it makes perfect sense and will encourage people to join staff at Battle Creek!
Eternally hopeful for absolutely no good reason, you gotta admire his persistence.
Seattle PD falls for it…
Wonder if they will also have some NOI people there to rant about the Jews.
Yes, join now!
The floodgates have opened. Tens of thousands of people are going to be flooding into the org after watching the Cult Shopping Network.
Somehow I think even the people inside the bubble are losing faith in the promises.
SuMP casting call
How weird is this?
Nothing unreal about this…
Perfectly normal thoughts for someone on an acid trip.
This is what being on staff at the Tampa Org means? You will be a master of the universe?
The most important event in history
If that’s true, why is it being held ON THE STREET? And you have to scramble to get canopies and heaters at the last minute?
Remember when you held events at the Shrine? Or even the LA Sports Arena?
Your shrinkage is showing….
50,000 times clearer?
Has anyone ever explained this? It’s like you get XRay vision or something when you buy one of these?
Another one who says she is a Christian…
But that never stopped her from a little old-fashioned self-promotion.
She and Crazy Joy Villa are quite the pair.
Our “secret weapon”
Giving money to the IAS.
This is how you win the game for the fastest expanding org on earth. You get people to give money to the IAS. Nothing whatsoever to do with org expansion. Hubbard is rolling in his grave.
I’m now seeing an optometrist who’ll make my vision 50,000 times clearer.
I just love, “Good Ole Fashion….”
NOT with that sweater, COB….
Apparently one of the powers you are given by joining the Tampa Ideal Org is the power to ignore with impunity the rules of typesetting.
The HSN of cults! So true! Lmao ? ?
One thing I will never understand is why the upper crust of scientology just doesn’t throw Miscavige under the bus for all the crimes scientology has committed, and then just move on pretending to be a religion, or whatever the fuck they want to be, who really cares at that point.
Just pin the blame on that one sad sack Miscavige, and be done with it. Are they really that pathetic as humans?
I was personally involved in two organizations where an asshole egomaniac was ousted by a few brave souls who decided to do something. One of these organizations was professional, the other was a volunteer community organization.
Where are the brave souls in scientology, or are they all cowards?
I really should join up with scientology as a sleeper cell, like a Manchurian Candidate, and just rot it out from within. I know those people are there already, and Miscavige knows they are there, but I’d like to be one of them to write an amazing book one day.
A tomato turns state evidence on Miscavige and sends him to prison… so OT. LRH would be proud of me.
Why don’t we all file lawsuits against David Miscavige for fraud, deceit and abuse?
Lets do to Miscavige what Miscavige did with the IRS – overwhelm him with lawsuits…
Imagine if 2,500 hundred of us filed lawsuits against the dwarfmeister dictator….
Force him into the court room.
It’s time to send David Misdcavige for crimes against humanity…..he needs to go to prison for life.
Computer Guy, because you lack standing in a court of law to file such lawsuits.
But in Scientology, there’s no mechanism for doing that – no functioning board of directors, or anything. It’s essentially a totalitarian regime, like North Korea, Syria, all the little countries with effective presidents-for-life, Saddam Hussein’s Iraq, Stalin’s Soviet Union, and so on.
Most don’t because has their PC folders with all the secrets they don’t want the world to know about them…
What Are Your Crimes, Because those “at the top” were used to scamology being run as a dictatorship. Also, the same people who were afraid of Miss Cabbage as he took power are the same ones you are talking about.
Mike,
Hearing the news that Aftermath Season 3 is coming made my week! I cannot put into words how much I admire you and Leah for exposing the cult. It must be so stressful and emotionally draining for the both of you. Thank you a thousand times over!
On a funnier note — that Taco Time flier just kills me. Seriously, $5 for kids and $10 for adults for some shitty tacos? Unbelievable. My parents attend a Christian church and whenever there are events the food is, of course, free. But $cientology just can’t refrain from squeezing every last dime out of their deluded members.
Do scientologists not realize that the flamboyant and gold “RON!” signature they keep using looks exactly like the word “PORN!”, specifically GAY porn with all the dazzling flim-flam around it??
(A nod to Seinfeld…”not that there is anything wrong with that”…)
Having been an employee of HSN for 11 years, I found “the HSN of cults” and “Cult Shopping Network” to be hilarious descriptions!
I hope the OT powers that guy will soon get includes the ability to pick a less ugly sweater.
Disruption invitations anyone? If you are in the area of any of these ridiculous scientology events, you owe it to humanity to get out there to protest and educate.
Oh, if only I could get out of this potted plant vessel. LRH promised me mobility on OTVIX (Operating Tomato 9).
Come on Hubbard, I am ready!
My favorite quote of the day: “Take Ron’s advice and do it!”
Here’s a fun project: Take a list of Ron’s “advices” (for example, Way to Happiness) and contrast them to what he REALLY did! Even on subjects as straightforward as dental hygiene and paying one’s bills; and that’s only a humble start; there’s so much more. That information is readily available. For example, in Russell Miller’s and Jon Atack’s exceedingly well-documented books.
Ron’s TRUE advice sums up to this: You can take my advice. I am not using it!
That last “ALERT” piece is, I take it, about the “birthday game” competition. It shows quite the cutthroat competition – and over administrative actions (“Exec Council” approval), and donations, not serving members.
I’ve heard that the birthday game is rigged in favor of orgs that management wants to win, and I think we can see in that granting of points for an administrative action, how the powers that be can put their foot on the scales.
It also seems that only recently-minted “ideal” orgs have whatever it takes to compete to win the game. I’m guessing that’s because they’ve recently been pumped-up with extra staffing as part of the “ideal” push, and a reminder that the orgs that went “ideal” in previous years are slipping back into sub-par performance – not building toward “St. Hill size” or whatever.
Yeah.
Ask Sracy Francis about “Bishop” Noel Jones.
Same as it ever was.
Same as it ever was.
*Stacy
And IIRC – somehow the NOI ties in as well.
Busy girl.
On the promo piece that has the names of 150 people who confirmed to be at Sump’s grand opening, one of the names was “Johnny Cash.” Think they are just making up names to look good? I perused the names and didn’t find any I know and I know a lot of people in Scn. So I think they have to be staff member names, made up names, and maybe a few real people because only a few people signed up.
Are they letting them close the street for their block party??? Omfg. ?
Every week another asking for folder help . I was a teacher for 24 years. Anytime I needed something done I would tell the class anyone who helps gets a free test pass. Just offer free rise up the bridge, noticed free, and all will be done in less than a week.
Good idea, David Bates, and this may work in the real world, but it doesn’t work that way in Scn. Back in the 80’s and 90’s the church needed some admin help on the files project and so they told public Scns that they would pay them for work in the form of training awards so that they could eventually earn free courses in Scn. So lots of people got excited about that and signed up and worked their tails off only to find out the church reniged on its promise and didn’t pay. They made some excuse and ended the project. One person I know had earned enough to buy the Briefing Course and then the church reniged and refused to pay.
I live in a particular area of Virginia that is saturated with military ,CIA ,and other high technology entities . I researched just out of curiosity about where the nearest Ideal Org is located and it’s in Washington DC. Just wondering why they haven’t made real efforts to set up in Virginia like they do in other states.One possible explanation is that where I am from,we have the largest conglomeration of Navy personnel and it would seem to me that anyone from Scientology seen wearing the Sea Org uniform would be laughed out of town. Am I correct in that assessment?Just wondering after reading about all these “launches” and their “monumental “impact they are supposed to be making ?
Well, there are a lot of states in the US without any scientology org:
Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Delaware, Idaho, Indiana, Iowa, Louisiana, Maine, Maryland, Mississippi, Montana, Nebraska, New Hampshire, New Jersey, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Vermont, Virginia, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming
I thought there was some Scientology place in Elizabeth, New Jersey. Isn’t that where LRH held forth before he came up with his Scientology pitch? It’s some kind of shrine, I think.
Yeah it’s an old house in Bay Head. But no Scientology Org in the Garden State.
Well according to the ICS Website they have mission on Westfield Ave
Elizabeth, NJ. I thought so. Though on Google ratings it only gets 1 1/2 stars. Hmmm? When I read the LRH biography I remembered that Elizabeth, NJ played a part in the early days of LRH’s huckstering.
Whoa! That really highlights just how small they are. Boy, those states with no Scientology are a bunch of lucky ducks! But, soon enough Scientology will be an afterthought.
This is interesting information and puts the size of scientology in perspective. I thought they were in most if not all states. Shows how fake bullshit can spread.
I had to process your entire response . That’s makes a lot of sense . Thank you.
I don’t think Scientology ever really made an effort to set up in states – their orgs (and the missions, now mostly fading, that some orgs grew out of) are accidents of history, depending on where clusters of students of Dianetics and Scientology happened to form, and often coming down to whether one or two people had the energy, charisma or resources to build up groups and organizations. No new orgs have been opened in about 25 years, even as the US’ urban footprint has expanded by about 30%, and the only thing that has happened is that, once again, the orgs that have some affiliated individuals with initiative and resources, have gone ahead and raised money for large (but largely empty) “ideal” buildings, while everything else (including the mission network that is supposed to feed the orgs from satellite locations in surrounding areas) has languished.
I did an example analysis over at Tony Ortega’s Bunker, with Washington state, showing that their Seattle org is only within the 15-20 minute driving range that business analysts consider the maximum that potential potential customers are likely to drive, of 7% of the city’s metro area population, 5% of the state’s population, and 3% of the population if Idaho to the West is included to account for all the sort of states that Mike cites which have no Scientology presence at all. And yet rather than trying to build out (or even support the mission network, which is actually collapsing), Miscavige has concentrated on encouraging existing orgs to expend their energy and resources burdening themselves with unneeded large and lavish buildings.
As much as Scientology is in many ways a business, they haven’t even done what growth-minded churches have done, and planned to expand geographically including into unserved areas. I think that is due in part to an odd philosophy of extreme belief that individuals should do everything for themselves with no help (which is why they don’t help the poor, disabled, etc.), along with Hubbard’s mistaken expectation that the “mission” franchise system (they are, bizarrely, financial franchises) could be counted on to encourage individuals to continue to expand Dianetics and Scientology the way it had worked during the early years of popular interest.
I just thought about this from your explanation ;Virginia is a Commonwealth and has very unique tax laws concerning property taxes. I wonder if that’s also a reason because our property taxes are HIGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Zardu, thank you for asking the Virginia-heavy military-Sea Org uniform question (and Mike, thanks for your clear response). I’m ex-Navy, in NoVA and I’ve wondered what I would do if I saw them strolling down the street in that uniform. And echoing your property tax comments for here in VA!
Zardu – Captain Miscavige and the gang decked out in their military blues or blacks or whatever color they are would probably get a lot of attention in your area.
Zardu Bafflemaff I have similar experience in your area. No longer there but fairly involved in the local scene for some time. I think the same thing about the SO uniforms. I literally laugh when I see the SO picture with Davey standing in front with the other SO members behind him. You are so right about being laughed out of town.
Hey Eff Pee ….. wanna come out and play?
Sorry folks, I couldn’t resist. And let me pin my own ears back for being so childish so Effie won’t have to waste any valuable time doing so!
Yo Dave,
Howz the angst today good buddy. Only about 30 minutes to wrap up those highest ever, all time greatest influx of new meat into your Orgy stats for this greatest of all weeks of all time …….good buddy!
Oh yeah, the Thursday stats! Forgot about those. I wonder who the infantile little monkey is slapping around today for fucking everything up?
I live near Seattle and HATE that the PD is involved w co$. Has anyone had any luck getting their local departments to pull out of events like this? I was thinking of posting the flyer on their local FB page and calling them out on it.
Do it Susie Q!
You definitely should!
Just a non Scientologist question here, but does anyone who is now out, now believe that David Mischavige (Little Napoleon) still believes in LRH’s purported mission, or did he catch on eventually that this was all about getting rich and powerful by any means? I am a big believer in a follow the money (which can mean any type of benefit) motives.
I believe Dave believes that he eventually caught on to how to best run the universe. After all, who else could figure it out.
The dwarf said he was a “Natural Clear”. As well a “Natural OT.” So he doesn’t have to do shit. I wonder if he signs autographs…
Sigh…it seems the more I try to get a handle on all this the more I really need another piece of chocolate and an aspirin 🙂 Thank you for your feedback.
Peggy,
If you stick to your ‘follow the money’ theme I think you will have 99% of the answers. The last 1% can usually be resolved with an alcoholic beverage of choice.
That’s a great piece of advice Newcomer! Thank you.
And he also bitch slapped his last auditor, being the little bitch Miscavige is. He is SO going to enjoy the Federal penitentiary.
That’s one of the things I was wondering WhatAreYourCrimes – who’s watching where the money is going? Is it being transferred to some off-shore account just in case someone needs to make a fast get out of town trip where there’s no extradition?
I am holding out hope that this is just one of those long investigations because the corruption goes so deep and across so many different states and includes LE, the attorneys , etc. Someone has to care about all those children who are not even given the decent education of reading and writing and math skills. What a tangled web.
Thanks for the notice about the Leah/Mike series renewal. I’ve read her book and his book. I already knew the stories but both books were so captivating that my heart pounded whilst reading, thus I couldn’t read them at bedtime. Mike, you and Leah are so brave in what you are doing. I still wonder why everyone on the A&E show still calls it a “church” and the suckers/people “parishioners.” Threats from their lawyers? Hmmm …
Old habits are hard to break but they could probably refer to “the organization and it’s members” without legal liability. Every time they want to say “the church” just say “the organization”.
The sea org as “the ecclesiastical order of the organization”? How about “the military style part of the organization”? They walk around in military style uniforms and might have some sort of ranking.
It’s all about the terminology.
CDJ I didn’t see the notice about the Leah Mike series renewal. Can you give any details? I’m so looking forward to them having another season.
Nevermind. I read further on the comments and found the info on A&E Series renewal. Congrats to Mike and Leah!
How about a few of us show up at the “block party” wearing tee shirts that read:
1) Call your mother…..
2) Want out…..we can help
3) Life is BETTER on the outside
4) Blow & don’t look back….
5) Aftermath TV…..the TRUTH spoken
6) St Patty’s Day Celebrations are better than LRH Birthday celebration
7) IT WILL COST YOU NOTHING TO JOIN US
A few other ideas I have as well……
Brilliant, Balletlady! Simply brilliant! Bravo! When do we start printing?
How about a T-Shirt that says:
Cost to become a:
Christian, Jew, Mormon, Muslim
Hindu, Buddhist:
$0
Scientologist OT VIII
$250,000 to
$1,000,000 & up
Oh, Our community can come up with a few more!! : )
Your Secret Weapon? Well, let’s see, Stacy. you’ve got at least 3 lbs of hair weave.. Plenty of room in there for something – a gun, maybe? You look like a gal who’d be packing. .
Good one, Aqua. I looked at her pic and thought she was a guy in drag.
Bean & rice tacos… Yeah, give the public a tatse of what it’s like to eat like an SO member.
Minus the tacos:)
The SO only wishes they could dine so well.
Couple thoughts on the Chicago announcement.
1. I love that one of the attendees is named “Friend.”
2. Why in the world would the event be held in Northlake? There’s a Walmart and a Portillos and a truck stop in Northlake. And those are the interesting things. I’ve lived in Chicago most of my life and attended lots of conferences in the city and suburbs. Not once have I ever been to the “Midwest Conference Center” in Northlake, Illinois. I Googled it, and I’ve driven by it many times. I thought it was a senior living facility. There’s a picture of it on Google with a view of a park out the windows and the city lit up in the distance. Complete and utter Photoshop. That’s not what that area looks like at all.
Nice catch. I looked it up on Google Maps, and the conference center is near the airport, tucked into a corner backing up against an on-ramp of the intersection of two major highways, across from recycling facilities. Classy, particularly given that they have a large historic building with a beautiful exterior in the heart of Chicago, that is going to waste because they haven’t been able to raise the money to fix up and use it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKrOF3Wje40
Bwah ha ha ha … IDEAL ORG!? Ha ha ha ha ha!
I googled a few of the people who are set to attend the Chicago event. Some of the names don’t some up with much info. Alex Alemis does, however. It appears he is a dentist. http://www.familydentalcare.com/alexander-alemis/. He’s a member of the “Concerned Business Association,” which is based on Scientology, Hubbard, and The Way to Happiness.
That Midwest Conference Center seems perfect for a modern CoS event. Reviewing the photos from past events, it looks like CoS will be keeping the finest of company:
*Here’s a big deal – from 33 years ago!
https://goo.gl/maps/oXRU9WAGexo
*Mike Ellis Jewelry – Strengthen the body without weight loss! https://goo.gl/maps/JAUvNtrWT4m
*Elma Nail Tech School – all the Tech your grubby fingers need. https://goo.gl/maps/DQLqB83isvs
*Boxing Ring Babes
https://goo.gl/maps/1PxTUArSQqq and
https://goo.gl/maps/fcCB5ndeF4S2
*Phillip Marlowe lookalike contest, or Mafia Convention 1958: https://goo.gl/maps/kzurjLn6MCB2
*Not* a Scientology gathering:
https://goo.gl/maps/7A3z4SGAfQz
*This* is the Scientology gathering:
https://goo.gl/maps/AFKmdjqFqrv
P.s. COB won’t be happy with the facility adult-size podium, so don’t expect him to attend unless someone brings his special shorty version.
How many peach boxes does the dwarf use nowadays?
Herbalife, ha ha. Scientology is the Herbalife of religions.
Stacy is so proud of that cover, using 16” of cleavage to sell a “religious” publication. Well, she better like it, because she’ll be using those for holiday “stocking stuffers” until she’s 80.
Yes – huge hair, eyes like sink holes, extreme decolletage, silver- glitter stiletto booties – that classy look – Nashville on steroid overdose.
Taco Time??? So out of touch on so many levels. Why is the woman not Latina?
Is there going to be an Ol’ Fashion hymn-sing afterwards? After singing “We Stand Tall”, the repertoire is exhausted and everyone just heads for the border?
She is. It was stolen from a Mexican commercial artist who died over 50 years ago.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eduardo_Cataño
They took the pic from the Wiki, I think.
First, I think it’s worth noting that we have yet to see Scientology claim that anyone has come in to the orgs because of ScnTV – and we know that we can count on them to hype and over–hype even the vaguest hint of response – though of course 2pm Thursday has yet to come. I’ve also not noticed anyone showing up here or at Tony Ortega’s Bunker asking questions after having watched ScnTV.
It’s interesting and a bit creepy to the see subtle coercion going on with them naming in print all the people who said “yes” to doubtless incessant invitations for the “birthday” event in Chicago and were then expected to show up. And that list of 133 people probably represents just about everyone they could ever get to come to anything, more or less confirms other signs I’ve been seeing that the average org in a good-sized US city has a total “field” of around 100-150 who will show up for “all hands” events; only about half of those will likely be active members, maybe less in Chicago where their “field” is too weak to have even gotten it together to renovate the decaying historic building they bought more than a decade ago to be their “ideal” org.. And that in a metropolitan area with a population of 9.5 million people, with not a single mission.
We’re definitely left to wonder what “Victory” might mean in Kansas City, yet another of the locations where they bought a historic building more than a decade ago, and have been unable ever since to complete the fundraising to renovate it. Is it just over-hyping of some minor progress in their stalled campaign? Or did they get put on the list of orgs to finally be bailed out with outside help by Miscavige, so that he can keep up the appearance of a steady pace of “ideal” org openings, as was recently done with Orlando?
‘yet another of the locations where they bought a historic building more than a decade ago, and have been unable ever since to complete the fundraising to renovate it.’
Well, the good news is, when Someone does finally nab these miscreants, they might not have ‘the passwords to/the bank accounts’, but they Will be able to seize Million$ in real estate!
Peacemaker, you wrote: “It’s interesting and a bit creepy to the see subtle coercion going on with them naming in print all the people who said “yes” to doubtless incessant invitations…”
What makes you think that even ONE of them said ‘yes’. Maybe all they are doing is trying to shame those individuals to show up.
The coersion continues.
Based on my experience, and what I can tell of how Scientology operates these days, they have refined their coercive techniques a bit more than that. They will have badgered people constantly by every means possible to get them to say yes and “confirm” – a “stat,” or count, some staffer was pushed with “unreasonable” expectations to get as high as possible, and is responsible/blamed/punished for – but they have the problem that many people may have given in finally just to get get Scientology off their backs, and as Mike alludes to, many not actually come. So now they’re trying to put people on the spot publicly, to try to ensure that they do actually come – and to make it clear that Scientology is keeping track.
Nailed it Jim.
Back in the day when the East/West Germany wall came down, the iron curtain, the church spread the PR line that it was because of all the people auditing on OT VII and their postulates that made the wall come down. So if they would claim that, of course they’ll claim all sorts of un-verifiable OT things happened as a result of SUMP opening.
Hmmm … Ever wonder why the big tent is yellow? Ever heard the expression, “Do not eat the yellow snow?”
Could it be that former members have stopped by in the past and when no one was looking, they ….?
Great News about a 3rd season!
Congratulations on the renewal for Season 3.
I read that, “A&E renewed a series dedicated to taking down the controversial religious group.” at the following link. I never knew that before. But so much the better:
http://tvline.com/2018/03/14/leah-remini-scientology-and-the-aftermath-renewed-season-3-ae/
I’ve heard it is expected the North Korean dictator will have all the NK athletes executed because they failed to win a single medal. That is just a rumor at this time. But I feel sorry for those people who are producing the CO$ TV show. When the ratings are made public, I can just imagine what Little David will do to them. Maybe the result will be that he finally gets charged with violence against innocent people.
I also saw that Kirstie Allie wrote a fairly heartless tweet about Stephen Hawking. I wonder what the CO$ position is on that. I know they hate Psychiatrists and Psychologists. Is it possible Kirstie that saw he was a Physicist and mistook that for a “Psychologist”? That would just be more evidence of the need to educate the poor slaves in that cult. But it would be so hilarious.
https://pagesix.com/2018/03/15/kirstie-alley-shares-heartless-tribute-to-stephen-hawking/
More likely she just looks down on him for being a “Degraded Being” who pulled in a body that didn’t work properly.
Stephen Hawking’s views of the universe were “light years” apart from those of Elron. I don’t know if he ever trashed Scientology but I think in one of his books he said heaven is a fairy tale.
A has-been and a foul-mouthed bitch, commenting heartlessly on the death of an adored Nobel prize-winning physicist.
That really says it all.
She chose the pseudoscience of a snake oil charlatan over the actual science of a real scientist. She is PATHETIC!
“It was manifestly impossible for one being to individually train and audit 2.5 billion people. Time alone would have prevented it.”
Hang on, LRH, you’re injecting MEST into thought there. Just postulate it and make it go right.
Hahahahaha brilliant!???
Here’s how he would say it: JUST MAKE IT GO RIGHT!!! At the top of his lungs. He’s really good at screaming.
People have been sent to the Hole for worse. LRH is an SP.
I meant people have been sent to the Hole for LESS.
Join staff at Steven’s Creek… Good one!
The headline packs a punch: “Something big is about to happen…”
Then, the graphics — like COBey’s fist coming right off the page — AT YOU.
Well done.
Duck and run!
“Something big is about to happen.” Don’t they say that at any and all events?
I’m going on three years out and it’s still the same old shit.
You don’t expect it to change in any way, do you?
From Frederique Mollet: “Please let me know it’s a rush.” Ok, ok, it’s a rush! Happy now?
Just new to your blog Mr. Rimder, but have been watching you and Leah’s great show, glad for a season 3. Then truths u r telling to expose this cult are mind boggling, and glad to hear Scientology numbers r dropping, the things I see on the show that happen, I can’t even imagine living that. It must take so much guts and stress to leave. I know u and your show are making a DIFFERENCE, thank you, and I hope one day your Children will see the truth and come back to you. Mike, is there Scientology in Canada, I don’t think so??? Thanks, Glenda from Canada
The fact that you are not aware that $cientology Does exist in Canada is a good indication of just how Well they are doing!
I’ve seen mention of them being in or around Guelph, ON, I think?
And Toronto still has a place they call a mORGue I think.
I nominate “over 68,000,000 visitors” to Orlando to be the world’s all-time most irrelevant statistic. Yes, how many feet of electrical wiring is actually more important. How many people who use the Internet every day is more impacting. I am frequently in Orlando, and know it pretty well. Outside of the area around the airport and International Boulevard and points south and southwest (Disney, Universal, Kissimee, etc), the number of tourists in the rest of the Orlando metro area is about the same as for Des Moines, Iowa.
But I have an idea. Why don’t Scientologists recruit people in airports? I know the Hare Krishnas use to do it with some success. If they could hawk their whack to some of those 68 mil coming and going at the airport that would at least show a respectable effort.
Just for fun, a short clip from the opening credits of “Airplane!” Notice David Leisure (“Joe Isuzu”) as a Hare Krishna. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iijPvIiDbL0
The e meter has 50,000 more clearer reads and even with that you are telling me nor the public, nor the staff can detect the SP inside Scn while receiving a PTS check?
Boy, something is still very wrong.
Silvia – I think this phenomena can be explained by confronting ALL of L Ron Hubbard’s Laws of Confusion and Commotion Tech….
You see… For every piece of Tech that says Scientology Works…there is an equal and more senior piece of Tech that justifies why it does not. That is How Scientology Keeps Bamboozling their members.
They WON’T LOOK and by now – CAN’T look! The truth could actually kill them. I think many would really lose it if they saw the degree of scamming and duping they have been subjected to. They would rather DIE to be right and sink with the proverbial Ship.
“The Cult Shopping Network” ???
Get a ‘Clear Bracelet’ for only $5,000!
I melted down my Oh tee Ate bracelet into wedding bands. I think I paid 3k for the bracelet as a way to get my remaining funds for accomodations off the freakwinds.
The happiness which was elusive in the cult has turned into reality. And that was a very good way to get rid of something I would be embarrassed to wear into something I am proud to wear!
Yo Dave,
How is Shelly doing?
Good for you, newcomer! Please say ‘Hi’ to your wife for me. I still think back about the great time we had.
And there are more to come OSD.
I’m looking forward to it!
Get a Scientology “CLEAR YOUR BANK ACCOUNT” Bracelet for only $1,534,231 – see your Registrar today.
it is a charm that says – “I cleared my Bank Account for Slappy Miscavige”
“One Day Sale on EasyBakes Your Favorite Spring Colors Lemonade, Milk of Magnesia Pink and Int Event Blue $5 Off While Supplies Last”
The HSN is a multi $ billion success story running non-stop commercials with “good deals” on consumer goods. The Cult Shopping Network (CSN) is selling well packaged lies against a tidal wave of nasty, criminal accusations. This is no more than Miscavige’s last ditch effort to snag a few deaf, dumb and blind people….. but most people still have a sense of smell. And, the smell of decomposing flesh in Scientology is a dead giveaway…
Scientology TV? Couple a thoughts
Not with a bang but a whimper
Another Scientology Oxymoron, Hollywood cult … crappy production.
Answer songs. This is the equivalent of answer songs.
I think they need to redo.
Can it be a bang with a whimper?
?
Also known as a ‘blamper’. A cousin to a “fizzer” in firecracker terminology.
What the Hell is a ‘blamper?’
Thanks Mike.. as always, good reading.. it’s funny, but not at the same time.. whenever I see one of these posters, I still get this small, level of anxiety that I need to perform some how, ugh
Signing of the Constitution, going to the moon, Berlin wall coming down, 9/11… those pale in comparison. This year’s LRH birthday celebration is THE BIGGEST EVENT IN HISTORY. Wow.
And $10 for some shitty tacos?? No thanks, I’ll wait for Scientology sushi night.
Mike, I can’t wait for Season 3 of Aftermath. Congratulation to you and Leah. Might I say, Very Well Done! Lol.
Beware Bad …………. there is a lot that is fishy with our favorite cult! You may want to wait for more rice and beans.
Hey, Badafuco, don’t forget that OT 8s brought down the Berlin Wall with their Super Duper Mind Powers.
So, where’s the list of ‘attending celebrities’ at the LA org?
Maybe Danny M will show up if he can coerce Julian Schwartz to come along and stuporvise his activities.
He’s not in jail yet?!
He is definitely in a jail of the worst sort. Though luck!
“Remember when you held events at the Shrine? Or even the LA Sports Arena?”…..The SHRINERS DON’T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS CHILD ABUSING CULT !
Hey, Noble:
Are you a shriner?
I’m not a Shriner, but, I am a shiner.
God forbid one EVER thinks about an action before doing it.
“Now, jump off that cliff!”
Can anyone guess why an aspiring, felonious cult leader would want to inculcate its members with such an admonishment?
Agree wholeheartedly with your summary on that one. That Hubbard quote would have to be the one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever tried to equate into the Scio mindset, or any mindset. Just goes to show how any effect from source is a good one for a Scio I suppose (even better if it leads to money – Scios axiom 0).
Scientology bank accounts are full of “thoughtless money,” but they insist otherwise. Oh my… Scientologists are such silly people, no wonder they are broke.
It does make me appreciate the utter uselessness of that organisation though. If Scientology collapsed tomorrow and Miscavige thrown into jail along with the other fraudsters in its inner sanctum, the rank and file Scio would stand there with mouth agape in complete shock – “now what?” So much for that cause over life scenario promised by that ‘religion’ hey? Self determinism is the last thing a Scientologist has or will ever have believing in dribble like that.
What you wrote got me thinking I Yawn, what WILL the last ones standing do and think? To be a fly on that wall…
Gosh, I dunno , Wyn. 🙂
I too am clueless Aqua. 😆
Woo Hoo on Season 3 of the Aftermath! Keep the pressure on! I would bet that ratings for the Aftermath is 1000’s of times better than SUMP!
So the newerest meter reads 50,000 times clearer?
Huh. According to the circuit for the Mark 8 E-Z Bake, the D/A converter driving the meter needle only has 4096 output values. Any resolution higher than that is the product of a wild imagination.
That “50,000 times clearer” really shows that whoever wrote that promo hasn’t got a clue about the subject!!
If “50,000 times clearer” actually means 50,000 times more sensitive, then the needle will be flicking around all over the place, making reads impossible……..
If it really means 50,000 times “more magnified” then you don’t need to be Professor Einstein to work out that the minutest needle tick will be magnified to full scale deflection (and then some……). This will also make the reads impossible to interpret…………
Anyone with half a grain of common sense can tell that this “50,000 times” is yet another of the scion’s fantasy figures.
How much are these pieces of useless junk anyway?
I bet I can get a far better automotive test meter (which IS useful) for a fraction of the price…………
I believe that a new EMeter is roughly $4k-5k. Used – last gen and before – seem to fetch $300 on eBay.
The Mark 8 has a clock built in, and a self-destruct countdown. If someone doesn’t do the yearly “update”, or their central records show that it’s not in the hands of a Scientologist in good standing, then it’ll lock-up until it’s reset. Plus, the paperwork fine-print says that people didn’t really buy them, but they’re still owned by CoS.
I doubt that they’re worth much on eBay.
RMycroft, I have been trying to figure out that “50,000 times more sensitive” claim for a long time. There is nothing in the electronics that justifies it.
Since it uses a digital front end and back end, by definition it has to have less resolution than the old analog versions up to the MK VII.
If by “sensitivity” they mean gain, that also makes no sense because the gain is set by the “hand squeeze test”. You squeeze (increase the grip) and adjust the gain until a squeeze gives you 1/3 of a dial of drop on the needle. The ability to adjust the gain to some ridiculously high setting doesn’t help any unless you are trying to audit an elephant or something. Their very tough skin with no proper sweat gland concentrations would make the e-meter pretty useless, regardless of the gain.
Maybe they use that high gain when they audit tomatoes.
Resistance is futile! “Ohm”-ly speaking the truth.
Bruce, how tomatoes are audited with 50,000 times the voltage. Hubbard style.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aukC_PhK2mY
I bought an e-meter for $125 in 1976 or 1977. They now cost 40 times that much. That’s inflation and technology for you.