OMG — It’s Yuuuge
Kevin and Barbara Wilson, executives extraordinaire are going to be the new ED and D/ED Valley. Wonder what is going to happen to their incredible WISE business.
Anyone know the protocol for selling a Mark Super 7?
Not really. Probably better off just throwing it in the trash as it is now worthless.
Scheduling problems
They seem to be constantly changing these events — when nobody RSVP’s that they will be attending, they just change the date. And apparently none of these EVER have anyone RSVP.
It’s a VERY important meeting
Well, aren’t they all? But the subjects are pretty bizarre. This is “Flag”, not scientology “management.”
Keep the Highlighter
Wow, such a deal. But don’t be a square — give us more money.
Epic, Legendary, Legacy
Lame.
Moneywinds
Another Conventio that is optional
And another one…
This one gets no date at all — but surprise, its about the REAL prerequisite to “OT” – having money.
More money…
The right to be prosperous… Really? Not with any regges around.
One of the most famous opening lines in science fiction
At least inside the bubble.
A bit of an overstatement?
Not content with claiming it is the first breakthrough in the history of earth – it’s in the history of the entire universe.
Big Release
A “program”? Surely they jest.
CF countdown
Only 5,000 files left. Out of 6,000.
Training is permanent
Unless of course there is a new course released. Or another version of “GAT”. Or new books. Nothing is actually permanent in scientology if there is an opportunity to sell it all over again.
New Teeth Whitening Tech
The Purif. Now I have heard it all….
Theme: Pirates
They really seem to equate the ideal org program with pirates. Wonder why?
A Dianetics Campaign like you have never seen before
Unless you were around in the 80’s when Jeff Hawkins was running the Dianetics campaigns.
Now they need “continental studios” even though SuMP is going to “broadcast to the billions across the world.”
Expansion
33 empty auditing rooms is way better than 2 empty auditing rooms I guess…
Money, it’s always about the money
ED Criminon
Apparently he doesn’t do Criminon any more. IAS Commissions is a better gig.
Shame on you
5 and 6 year olds — “Recoveries”? “FSM”? “IAS”?
Why is Nancy Cartwright’s name never mentioned on cult promo material?
Is it on her instructions?
Don’t the $ci public think this is unusual?
Mancy or her advisors must be aware that it is toxic PR to the real world.
What do people think…?
Does each of the shiny new CLO buildings (SH, EU, …) contain a small but lavishly equipped TV studio which can feed into SMP Master Control in LA?
I saw Maria Robb a few days after she “left” her job at sterling a couple of years ago. She showed me some black and blue marks on her arms and she told me Kevin Wilson hit her. Is that how he plans on getting the stats up at valley org?
Since She Who Must Not Be Named was mentioned in the promo –
Shouldn’t her title be “His Majesty’s Governess of the Vast Valley Territory” ?
If they want to keep the “Her Royal” styling, the third word needs to be an adjective. Suggestions?
Why are they not naming her any more? I forgot…
FSSO Sharon Webber is looking skeletal, and I notice they didn’t include her name in the flyer. Maybe the cult expects her to blow. I hope she does. She doesn’t look well to me.
Asking permission to sell an overpriced ohm meter ? Very very sad… Phil
Yeah, and clams can’t just answer a damn question – it’s “see the bookstore officer for the reference.” Always a damned reference – how to dust a car, wash windows, make baby formula…
The Freewinds brings conquering life titans to La.oops make that next week.
Legitimate entrepreneurs in scientology? That is impossible. Axiom 1: Life is basically a scam. If it is not a scam it is not scamotology.
So I looked up like Tom Cummins and Emmet Osborn.
And obbb.org/west-Florida/business-reviews/energy-service:
The BBB has received a pattern of complaints from customers involving sales practice and billing issues alleging that the rates they are being billed are double and triple their previous invoice and that of the rates the business had promised.
In February 2014, BBB contacted American Power and Gas, LLC requesting information as to why the business believes the customers are filing the complaints and what actions the business has taken to help eliminate the cause of complaints.
American Power and Gas, LLC believes the cold weather induced surge in energy costs and electric bills which has affected many energy suppliers. The business stated it has expanded its customer service department in order to individually service any and all of their customers to ensure their needs are handled
– See more at: http://www.bbb.org/west-florida/ reviews/energy-service-business-
From past employees Glassdoor on American power and Gas LLC.
Pros: The only pro to working for this company was the day I no longer worked for this company!
Cons: Ghettorific environment, Egocentric no it all trainers with Sailor language including the President of the company. (Editor Note: he just completed the golden age of c***sucking interning under COB himself) I really wonder if they have ever been sued for sexual harassment or in appropriate behavior towards employees. I have never worked anywhere who encourages employees to smoke the way this company does. You can’t stand anywhere near the building because the haze of smoke that comes through the hallways o… Show More
Advice to Management
Not much since it’s all a lie. Perhaps not cursing so much during training and stop showing the boiler room as a great example on how to sell. In boiler room they all went to jail. Which is what will probably happen to some of you. Oh and watching the cookie monster rendition of the boiler room and acting in appropriately with a woman is not my idea of a GREAT TRAINING TOO!!! You definitely give good trainers and bad name that are in this industry.
Pros
There are absolutely no pros to working for this company. According to posts on internet via several consumer complaint agencies, they rip people off.
Cons
Speaking of cons, one person hired has more than one felony. The people working there were dressed sloppy, bad grooming, the facility is a dive. They aren’t even accredited by the Better Business Bureau.
Advice to Management
Find a better way to finance your life other than by running a scam operation. The vulgar language really isn’t very professional. Basically it backs up your true nature.
Doesn’t Recommend
Negative Outlook
I have been working at American Power and Gas full-time
Pros
THERE ARE NONE. IT’S A TELEMARKETING SCAMMING PLACE.
Cons
Energy telemarketing at its worst. Lying to customers to make money is not a job. All management are scientologists and it should be kept out of the work place. These guys will get sued soon for bad business.
Advice to Management
You’re not above the law. Stop now.
Pros
Great place to work as far as money is concerned, if you’re able to make it through training and show you have potential, they will work with you. I worked there for over a year and made a nice income.
Cons
Oo boy here we go. Business model is based off of undercutting the utility’s price and luring the customer into a lower rate. This rate is an introductory rate that is only lower than the utility’s rate for the first month of signing up. The company will actually lose money the first month a customer signs up with them, hence them making their into rate so low. They call it THE FLOAT. The customer sees that lower rate on their first bill, and says hey this company is great. Hahaha no sir, people then watch their rate double, even triple in most cases. This company in no way helps their customers. They legally screw people. I honestly couldn’t work there anymore knowing what was going on after we enrolled people. I could go on and on here, but I don’t feel like typing anymore.
Advice to Management
you guys have no conscience, making money is great, but at what costs? the worst part is I, among others have heard the ones in charge speak of how much these peoples rates will be raised. You guys need to rethink what your doing, and find something ethical to do for a living. That or stop being so greedy, and actually help your current/potential customers. It’s just wrong, and hopefully enough people will complain, that something gets done here
Kaye Champagne: definitely someone you want to listen to:
Used to sell rugs and velvet Elvis paintings on Clearwater streetcorners.Now moved up to tents in shopping centers
Biggest brownnoser on the whole track: commissioned a sculpture of the galactic samurai for Davey’s birthday in 2014. https://www.mikerindersblog.org/flag-otc-brown-nosing-reaches-new-heights/
Has a deep insight: Jason Begeh left scientology because he was pdh’d(scio slang for influenced by pain drugs hypnosis)
Dear Brandy wil probably sound like her in 30 years.
But wait maybe she will start getting it she recently redid the Student Hat and PTS rd. http://www.truthaboutscientology.com/stats/by-name/k/kaye-champagne.html
Jim Bridgeforth is in charge of the telemarketing for the energy scam.Doesn’t he looks like a retired mafia sub boss?
Whoa! The Mafia now has their own submarines? Who do they get to operate them?
I have actual experience in political fund raising. During the period between my pizza delivery job and driving a cab I worked for two weeks at FLS-DCI to raise funds for the Republican Party of Minnesota. As rough as it can be on the fund raiser there is NO EXCUSE for treating the potential donor as just another sucker.
I seriously told the fellow who hired me that I’d “eat my gun” before I would do anything to help the Democrats. And he thought I was a bit over the top when I said that.
The call center was a nice place to work and the use of what our boss called the “effenheimer” was grounds for termination from employment and we had to exercise call in the language we used in general. One day I tacked up in my cubicle the following verse:
Yea though I travel in the Valley of Death, I shall fear no evil, for I’m the kind of person whose character and conduct may not be discussed in the call center.
Of course after two weeks of listening to a bunch of benefactors of government spending whine on and on about how they were entitled to a piece of the taxpayers money I was ready to start dropping some F-bombs myself.
(Note: I’m presently living on Social Security Disability, but I’m not going to be an ass about it.)
I’m 1) in an airport 2) in Cleveland 3) looking at massive quantities of bumf from the SS Mesothelioma. Death is an option.
Man, this week’s selection is depressing. Lots of the Failboat, lots of Valley’s lasts gasps of desperation before the death spiral begins (and appointing the Human Whirlpool Kevin Wilson as ED is a sign that the fun’s about to start), another abortion from Mighty My Mammy…it really sucks the life out of you. It makes you long for one of Kansas City Morgue’s inappropriate Western-themed flyers, or a picture of Gavin Harry Potter giving a lecture on a subject he knows nothing about. And, of course, the lack of material from HAPI is acutely felt. We need more reasons why Scotland is great! Of course, they’re getting close to 100, so maybe they’re pacing themselves.
At least RB is guaranteed to provide some lulz tomorrow. And, as the song goes, it’s only a day away.
Turning lemonade into lemons.
[ ] I want to attend this convention at a later date, the 5th of Never.
Oh, man! Sorry hgc! I thought we were supposed to have lunch together on the 4th of Never! I’m blaming it on my CRS…
‘We are putting in place every continental studio to directly connect to Scientology Media Productions straight from every continent- further expanding our reach and capabilities.”
So that is what SuMP is, a hub for a clam ‘go to meeting’. No connection to the general internet, but only to 1 of each clam ‘continent’. Dissemination, that isn’t!
Maybe, SuMP is actually supposed be a COL or Clams Online! Scientology’s own version of AOL! The time frame is about right for Scientology Technical advancement. 10-20 years after something is at it’s height being popular and forgot or soon to be. At least on AOL you could browse the regular internet with out woring about OSA tragating you for disconnect.
Continental studios make some sense – bleed the foreigners of their Euros and Yen. BUT – since “Achieving St Hill Status” is impossible (fresh bodies simply refuse to be routed, those stupid Wogs), why not order all Ideal Orgs to purchase/build their own local studio? More fundraising, more cash, more insanity.
Regarding Los Gatos event, I believe Marc Hilly is the son of Diane and Dick Hilly.
Poor kid. I was hoping these people were out. What is it 35 years now. Wake up people!
Hi Mike, The photo of the children with arms entwined seared my soul.Innocent and free to be,they have no clue what is going to hit them all.Really heart wrenching.The recoveries tee especially troubling.
And I must decline another post card pix of that Blue Dust Rust Bucket.That Old Lady really has had her day!Money is the only pin holding her up.Take it all away and she will gratefully sink to her rest.XXOO
I wouldn’t worry too much about it Ann B., that photo looked like a stock picture with the letters superimposed onto the backs of their t-shirts. not that scn has any qualms about using children for labor, but I don’t think those particular children are scns.
Hi sashiebgood, I am so relieved that those boys are not Scientologists.The picture with the blue tees took me back to Sea Org days when the little ones were @ Children’s Org,and exspected to have Big Being abilities even then.That Org is hard to shake,even after the long passage of time.XXOO
I see the Bart Simpson woman is still wearing her spectacles. That one small fact alone gives the game away. If you can reach OT VIII and still don’t have sufficient power over MEST to sort out your own eyesight then how can this whole crock of sh1t be anything other than a delusional fraud?
She just needs to redo her purf. and Objectives. Plus, throw in a couple of running programs and boom no more GLASSES. But most importantly write a note to the auditor about feeding her the Laser Eye Correction Cognition!
Who is next to bring back ?…Dean Stokes
Why is Jim Meskimen hosting the Valley shill-a-thon in his Jammie’s?
He doesn’t want to upstage Quinn the Eskimo.
Mike, you ask what *WILL* happen to Kevin Wilson’s “WISE” business, Sterling Management, if he joins the Valley Org as executive director of “Day.”
I strongly suspect he’s joining because of what has *ALREADY* happened to the Sterling Management business. I believe the WISE scam is largely played out among the historical constituency, dentists/chiropractors/other small professional practices. If you search Google for “Sterling management” and “dental”, 6 of the 10 results on the first page expose the connection to Scientology and only 4 are pro-Sterling. As we all know, the Scientology brand is more toxic to be around than a notebook full of Ebola-coated kiddie porn. And, adding insult to injury, the Google entry for the Sterling Management corporate site contains a warning that the site may be hacked, making people even less likely to click the link to get further information.
I recall that you published a document leak a year or two ago that showed relative financial contribution from various WISE-affiliated entries and I seem to recall that one or two individuals were contributing something like 2/3 of the overall funds from WISE; I don’t recall who they were but I would strongly suspect that Sterling was #1.
The overall amounts were small — $2 or $3 million per year, out of a total cult-wide revenue stream I estimate at around $150 million per year (though WISE revenue is royalties and it is therefore pure profit; the WISE consultants pay all the costs). But if those one or two people aren’t able to drive the WISE engine any more because of plummeting demand, I suspect that Miscavige is holding them responsible for the failure of WISE.
So is it possible that Wilson is being forced into indentured servitude as ED of the biggest fail in the entire Ideal Org scam as a way of making “amends” for letting the WISE revenue stream dry up? After all, WISE embodies Hubbard’s sacred “admin tech” which everyone knows is guaranteed to work on all organizations everywhere since it’s the same “admin tech” that propels Scientology to unprecedented straight up and vertical expansion. So if WISE is drying up, it’s clearly a function of incompetence on the part of the staff. And I’m sure Wilson has been browbeaten within an inch of his life over his failures already. Now he’s just trying to save his “eternity.”
Oh my! Not a conceptually pretty picture at all but this post sure lays out the crappy cycle of demise once involved with WISE. The fact Wilson is still clinging onto a sunken ship is sad, his eternity is now solidly guaranteed, like a train wreck. What makes it really suck is that he now can infect others (what’s left of ’em anyway) from a position of authority. Scientology is so full of ugliness.
Well spotted & presented John, but how do you remove that horrible left over taste?
Come In And
LEARN HOW TO DO BAD THINGS TO YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY!
Disconnection – Getting Money For Nothing – How To Program a Case For Maximum Donation
We can teach you how to do these things and more without feeling anything and it all starts with the simple principle, SCIENTOLOGY IS MANKIND’S SAVIOR!
Make your reservations now! Seats are selling fast!!
“LEARN HOW TO DO BAD THINGS TO YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY.” ROTFLMAO! Now that’s some funny shit, Mary! All completely true, but, funny nonetheless…..
?
Creating a more honest piece of promo.
Of course the Co$ is fascinated with pirates. After all, what were their most prized and expensive cargo? Human slaves.
The picture with the little boys actually makes me feel sick and ragey. Shame on them, indeed.
As for the email about SMP, does it mean what I think it means – SMP is here, but now you need to donate towards continental studios to connect to SMP before we start actually disseminating?
I chortled at some of the funnies up to that point but that kid photo stopped me in my tracks, truly sobering.
Right there with you, UhLasare. Those poor little boys have no idea what their parents have gotten them into. Shameful. And, of course, they need more money for the “continental studios.” All in a days work for the Church of Sucking You Dry…
That looks like a stock picture with text added on top.
You can see the same one here,
http://blog.sportssignup.com/blog/bid/196368/4-Tips-to-Avoid-Junk-Food-When-Traveling-for-Sports
That is good news. How did you find that picture? Good detective?
What a fucking waste of paper. $cientology, the religion of dead trees.
+1! I’m right there with you, HellOSA. I’m a tree hugger. When my wife and I were in Muir Woods in northern California, it was incredible! Some of the trees were hundreds of years old. Talk about your case gain.
Hmmm…wonder why no wide shot photos from the Valley shindig? Could it be embarrassingly low turn out?
Low attendance is a given at Co$ events – the more depressing stat (for COB) is the average age of the attendees. Is everyone there over the age of 55? My cousin (staff at Seattle Org) posted Xmas party pics – 3 tables, nothing but AARP-eligible victims. Sad.
quantum meters were squirrel when the OT 8 meter was released.
on the black market they sell for $400.or less.
If you get caught using one you get an instant SP declare unless you already have one(goldenrod).
scrapped quantum meter parts are sold in Sunland surplus stores for art projects
some still in the box are taken apart and in parts bins within minutes of coming through the door.
Is this true that if you were caught using a Quantum Mark VII Meter instead of the new OT VIII meter, you’d be instantly declared? Where did you hear this from?
OT 7 at Flag, I had purchased two quantum meters for the SHSBC
and OT 7 then poof, the COB moved the goal posts.
Write a letter to the COB if you are in doubt.
OUCH! Commiserations…
Looks like Kevin and Barbara will do the same for Valley as for Sterling. Straight down and vertical. Sterling got sued by a chiropractor for constantly sending out scam faxes.
In the deposition in 2014 the pers. director Moraru said:
MORARU: We are a small company.
PIPER: How many people are currently employed at SMS?
MORARU: 25.
PIPER: How many were employed in 1994 when you became Director of Public Affairs?
MORARU: Close to 300.
PIPER: Is there any particular reason why the number of people working there has gone down?
MORARU: Well, I can answer with one question. The economy. One answer I meant.
A report on working for sterling from Glassdoor in 2014.
“I worked at Sterling Management full-time
Pros:
I quit the micro-managing culture. I got away after she set up the cameras to watch when employees went to the bathroom.
Cons:
New management micro managed, vague directions that needed deciphering, old ideas, and trust issues. She fired the one person that kept the place running great. You are on call 24/7/365. New manager didn’t do anything, and left the work for everyone else.
Advice to Management:
Retire.”
Give it 6 months after opening, they will be demoted or declared and Valley will be another Sea Borg Org full of young eastern europeans. Well they have to have something for them to do.
In order for the Valley org to deliver 2000+ hours of auditing a week, each of the 33 rooms would have to be in use for 8.6 hours everyday. That dog don’t hunt.
Damn that wog math.
@Scott, they would also have to have 33 or more auditors willing to work those hours (not happening) and 33 or more available PCs (even less likely).
Are there even 33 trained auditors in the Valley anymore?
Interesting. Trying to figure out how many people would be served by 8.6 hours * 7 days.
I’ve never been in Scientology so I’m making seat-of-the-pants assumptions about audit session length and repeat visits. Please correct me if I’m way off.
Rounding the hours down to 8. If a session is 2 hours, then max capacity would be 4 per room, 132 a day, 924 sessions a week. If the regulars come in twice a week, then they’d be servicing 462 members per week. The Valley org isn’t even going to come close to that, are they?
Hmm, serial crim CEO Kevin Wilson is going to run the Valley Org. This aught to be fun. Where’s my popcorn?
I’ll buy the popcorn, Mike. It’ll be my pleasure. Can I bring anything else? Beer? Wine? A Goldenrod?
OSD, I don’t think alcohol will get us through it. Need something stronger
I think I can provide what you need, Mike. And, again, it will be my pleasure!
I can’t wait to see how Kevin will respond to the sec checks which will result from a failure to get the stats in power.
“Was there ever a time when you had negative thoughts about Cee Oh Bee when he told you to SHCOHB?”
Is this Barbara Wilson the longtime marital partner of Kevin Wilson?
Question answered, and Kevin and Barbara LONG time ago I think were involved in old Texas Mission(s) and lived that heyday period way back prior to 1982 Mission collapse in Scientologyhistory.
So, it likely won’t be a renaissance that Kevin and Barbara create, but the thought seems like the right direction from the viewpoint of trying to capture if possible the pre-1982 Mission system collapse excitement and drive to build up Missions.
Honestly, Kevin now, if he does pull this Valley Org off to any degree, if he’s game, he’d be the official Scientology of tomorrow in that he’s lived at least, the pre 1982 era, he and Barbara were training in 1980-81 on the old OEC Course, I helped train them at Flag Clearwater back then. They were great students back then, Kevin I always thought a model diplomatic and reassuring leader trainee.
The mentality though that Hubbard built into the top Sea Org management ranks I think would rebuff Mission Executive Directors, one for one.
The Sea Org rules just harshly grate against the spirit of Mission Executives.
Kevin I think and Barbara, had that old Mission Executives’ view, and that for a Scientology Mission is good.
How that will translate, their long term lives living through all they lived, and Hubbard’s principles about rekindling failure purposes, that line about “all you have to do is rekindle the failed purpose” type of thing, if that at Valley could even work, I think of Shelly Corrias’ statements (ex RTC Dissem person, ex Dissem person at Int) about the society around Scientology just isn’t buying Scientology, that the audience out there just isn’t buying, will really be the biggest block.
I don’t see how Scientology’s PR can ever be repaired due to the population at this time at least, has a greater understanding of what Scientology is that no amount of Mission spirit advance into society can counter.
IT’s gonna take a couple future generations who aren’t educated enough to even remember the Scientology actual history, to outstep the current societal rejection overwhelmingly of Scientology as a subject.
I think it’s gonna take MORE than just getting some old vet pre-1982 Mission collapse era execs to make Valley succeed in society’s current well informed understanding which prevents current society from buying Scientology period.
It’ll take decades of intervening ignorance to have a clientele of people in the world who don’t know the history of Scientology, to in the future ever “buy” Scientology.
The problem with that is…
1) I suspect that decades from now, there will still be an internet and that it will be even more integrated in people’s lives
2) Scientology is already very outdated, cannot evolve, and will be completely obsolete by then
The last time I was seriously concerned about status was during a session of Dungeons and Dragons.
Oh, if you come across a gazebo during a D&D session, leave it alone.
Or a statue Leslie. NEVER touch the statues!
Does it detect evil?
Which one? Hubbard or Miscavige?
You never heard the gazebo story, have you?
http://www.dndadventure.com/html/articles/gaming_stories.html
Eric and the Gazebo
Copyright 1986 by Richard Aronson (Original Story)
Let us cast our minds back to the early days of fantasy role-playing… In the 1970’s, Ed Whitchurch ran “his game,” and one of the participants was Eric Sorenson, a veritable giant of a man. This story is essentially true: I knew both Ed and Eric, and neither denies it (although Eric, for reasons that will become apparent, never repeats it).
The gist of it is that Eric… well, you need a bit more about Eric.
Eric comes quite close to being a computer. When he games, he methodically considers each possibility before choosing his preferred option. If given time, he will invariably pick the optimum solution. It has been known to take weeks. He is otherwise in all respects a superior gamer, and I’ve spent many happy hours competing with and against him. *Even today, if any player in our group takes an unreasonably long time to decide what to do, he draws calls of “Hurry up, Eric.” So if you imagine pauses before any Eric response, with the word pause to indicate an unreasonably long pause, you’ll have the flow down pat.
Ed, on the other hand, is very quick witted, of the general school that if you do the wrong thing quickly it may work out better than the right thing slowly. His pauses were usually signs that players were asking something very important or unbelievably unimportant.
So… Eric was playing a neutral paladin (Why should only lawful good religions get to have holy warriors? was the rationale) in Ed’s game. He had a holy sword, which fought well and did all those things holy swords are supposed to do, including detect good or evil (by random die roll). He was exploring some lord’s lands when the following exchange occurr.
Ed: You see a well-groomed garden. In the middle, on a small hill, you see a gazebo.
Eric: A gazebo? What color is it?
Ed: (Pause) It’s white, Eric.
Eric: How far away is it?
Ed: About 50 yards.
Eric: How big is it?
Ed: (Pause) It’s about 30 feet across, 15 feet high, with a pointed top.
Eric: (rolls dice) I use my sword to detect whether it’s good.
Ed: It’s not good, Eric. It’s a gazebo!
Eric: (Unusually long pause, even for Eric) I call out to it.
Ed: It won’t answer. It’s a gazebo!
Eric: (Pause) I sheathe my sword and draw my bow and arrows. Does it respond in any way?
Ed: No, Eric. It’s a gazebo!
Eric: I shoot it with my bow (rolls to hit). What happened?
Ed: There is now a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
Eric: (Pause) Wasn’t it wounded?
Ed: Of course not, Eric! It’s a gazebo!
Eric: (Whimper) But that was a plus-three arrow!
Ed: It’s a gazebo, Eric, a gazebo! If you really want to try to destroy it, you could try to chop it with an axe, I suppose, or you could try to burn it, but I don’t know why anybody would even try. It’s a @#%!$*& gazebo!
*(author’s note: Ed was in the army, and no, he did not say @#%!$*&. The letter count has not been changed for the linguistically curious. Clue: it was a gerund.)*
Eric: (Long pause – he has no axe or fire spells) I run away.
Ed: (Thoroughly frustrated) It’s too late. You’ve awakened the gazebo, and it catches you and eats you.
Eric: (Reaching for his dice) Maybe I’ll roll up a fire-using mage so I can avenge my paladin…
At this point, the increasingly amused fellow party members restored a modicum of order by explaining what a gazebo is. This is solely an afterthought, of course, but Eric is doubly lucky that the gazebo was not situated on a grassy knoll.
How pissed is Paul Cruse going to be when he discovers the super quantum meter he was talked into buying for $3000+ is now completely worthless? Still it’s good news as it will be another little upset with the cherch to add to his accumulation. My mark seven meter was not a special edition and I got ‘a good deal’ on it so it cost under $2000 however it was still painful tossing it into electrical recycling.
Wow! $2,000 for something that measures how sweaty your hands are or how hard you’re squeezing the cans. Yep, that sounds like a great deal! It does, though, sound like a great send-off for your meter, Gimpy…